The Docklands Girls

by June Tate

  Olive’s face flushed with rage. ‘I don’t need his sympathy or yours for that matter. I am perfectly happy with my life; I don’t need anybody feeling sorry for me. Not him and certainly not you! Go and find out for yourself how difficult married life can be, then you might understand me better.’

  With a sigh, Hildy rose to her feet. ‘I’m sorry we have to part this way, Mum. I had hoped we could have parted as friends, but I can see I’ve wasted my time. Take care of yourself.’

  She picked up her handbag and walked out of the house. At least she’d tried, from now on all she needed to be concerned with was getting ready to sail and she could do that now with a clear conscience.

  Back in the kitchen, Olive sat staring into the fire. A bitter woman? Yes, she was, and with good reason. These youngsters think they know it all. Now Hildy had made her choice. Well, good riddance! But as she sat, knowing she’d never see her daughter again, tears filled her eyes and she sat silently crying.

  On the Isle of Wight, Belle rushed to the front door, opened it and hugged Cora as soon as she saw her.

  ‘Come in, love. I’ll put the kettle on, or would you prefer something stronger?’

  ‘Oh yes, Belle. A stiff drink would really go down well.’ Cora followed her into the living room, sat in a comfortable armchair and looked around the room with its newly painted cream walls, comfortable furniture, cheerful curtains and potted plants on a small table. It was cosy and attractive.

  ‘My word, you have been busy,’ she said.

  Belle handed her a drink and sat in another chair nearby. ‘I’ve painted myself silly,’ she said. ‘The furniture is a bit old, but it will do until I make enough to replace it. How are you, love?’

  With a shrug, Cora said, ‘Much as you would expect. I’ve lost the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.’

  ‘But you don’t know that.’

  ‘I think I do. If you had seen the look on Simon’s face, you wouldn’t have any doubts.’

  ‘Did you ever sleep with him?’ Belle asked in her usual straightforward manner.

  Nodding her head, Cora answered. ‘Yes, eventually. We took things slowly, I’m sure Simon thought that if he’d suggested such a thing any earlier, I would have been upset. In fact, it was me that asked him. Ironic, isn’t it? I wanted to be courted, like any young woman. I wanted his respect as well as his love. Now I’ve lost both.’

  ‘That’s men all over,’ Belle raged.

  ‘Well, there you are.’

  ‘Come on, let’s go out to the pub, have a couple of drinks and get a meal. The sea air will do us both good and I’ve some interesting news to tell you.’

  It appeared that Belle had received a letter from Jackson in New York and it had been forwarded on to her from the post office.

  They sat at a table with a couple of drinks and Belle took out a letter from her handbag. She started to read the contents.

  My dear Belle,

  I hope you haven’t forgotten about me? It’s been a while, but as I told you, I was going to move to New York and here I am. I’ve got a job working in a hotel as a busboy. That means I help in the restaurant, clearing tables and setting them and assisting the waiters. The pay is good and we get our meals too. I have a small apartment with one bedroom with twin beds so another busboy and I share, which helps with the rent. We work different shifts so that means we have some private time and we get along just fine.

  Gee, Belle, I wish you could see New York. It’s a mighty fine city. They have an area here called Harlem where all we black folk hang out and listen to the music, where we are accepted for who we are. The city itself has so many different nationalities all living together that, here, there is no sitting in the back of the bus. How about that?

  You would love the shops, honey. This city is a woman’s dream. I really miss you, Belle, and think about you lots and the good times we had together and hey, I’ve got me a girl! She works in the hotel as a chambermaid and she’s just lovely. It’s early days yet, but I really like her so who knows?

  I hope you meet someone real nice. You deserve a good man to take care of you, Belle. Write and tell me what you’re doing. Are you still working building Spitfires?

  You take good care now,

  Jackson

  Belle folded the letter and grinned broadly. ‘My boy is doing just fine and I’m so happy for him. I hope he and his girl get married eventually – he’d be a great husband because he cares.’

  ‘That’s lovely news, Belle. I know how fond you were of him.’

  Belle stared off into the distance, looking wistful. ‘I’d like to find a man like that you know, Cora. I know I rejected the idea before, but being alone isn’t a lot of fun once you stop working and the evening closes in. That’s when you need male company with a man that cares about you.’ She looked across at her friend and saw the pain reflected in her eyes. ‘But, of course, you already know that.’ She leant over and squeezed Cora’s hand. ‘Don’t give up, love. He may come back, just give him time.’

  Cora tried to make light of the situation. ‘Just think, Belle. I could have been Joe Keating’s mistress if I’d a mind to.’

  ‘That would have been a big mistake!’ Belle said, looking askance at her friend.

  Laughing, Cora said, ‘You should have seen the look on your face then, Belle. Come on, you know me better than that. I’m never cut out to be an old man’s darling.’

  With a mischievous grin, Belle said, ‘Well, it would depend how old he was and how much money, then who knows, I might be tempted!’

  ‘Bloody hell, Belle, you’d kill him off in a month.’

  ‘Fabulous! Then I’d be a rich widow. Hey! It’s an idea worth considering.’ Then she doubled up with laughter.

  During her visit, the two women decided that Hildy and Cora would spend Christmas with Belle. They wanted to see Hildy before she sailed and this seemed a perfect answer for all of them. Cora would be alone as would Belle so why not get together?

  Prior to that, Cora was kept busy. The clientele of her shop seemed to be going to lots of cocktail parties and business was brisk. Simon hadn’t contacted her at all, which broke her heart, but didn’t surprise her. Now she was looking forward to Christmas.

  The Christmas break arrived at last and Hildy, Cora and Belle sat down to their Christmas dinner, having already celebrated with glasses of wine whilst opening gifts, but the main topic of conversation was of Hildy and her future in America.

  ‘Milt is going to meet me when the ship docks in New York. He’s managed to take some leave from the army so we’ll be on our honeymoon. We didn’t have time before apart from one night at the Polygon Hotel,’ she said.

  ‘Oh how exciting,’ said Cora. ‘Where are you going?’

  ‘We’ll be staying in New York and in the summer we’ll take off somewhere for a few days, but he wants to take me shopping. Imagine! New York and all those lovely shops!’

  ‘And no clothing coupons needed,’ Belle remarked. ‘I’m so jealous!’

  ‘I can’t wait,’ Hildy said. ‘After all, I’ve nothing to keep me here. It’ll be a whole new life, but I am a little nervous, I must confess,’ she said, her smile fading somewhat.

  It was strange, thought Belle, to see Hildy uncertain about anything. In the factory, she was so decisive and together. ‘You’ll be fine,’ Belle assured her. ‘Make sure you write and let us know how you get on.’

  ‘Oh I promise I will. What about you, Belle, what are your plans?’

  ‘I’ll open for business at Easter,’ she said, ‘and hope to take bookings for the summer. It’ll take a while to get established, but I’m ready for that.’

  ‘Whatever, it’ll be better than working in a factory,’ Hildy said. ‘At least you have your own home and that’s a bonus. What about you, Cora?’

  ‘I’ve no new plans, I’ll stay put in London, working at the shop for the time being.’

  Simon Pritchard spent the Christmas with his family in London. He tried t
o join in with the festivities and be cheerful, but he was missing Cora. No matter how much he tried, he couldn’t forget her, nor her background.

  During Christmas, Simon mulled over these facts, going over them continuously until his mother asked him if anything was wrong.

  ‘No, Mum. Why do you ask?’

  ‘Well, son, all through Christmas you’ve been somewhere else, not with us at all. What’s on your mind?’

  He apologised. ‘I’m sorry, I’m just tired and we have a case that’s hopefully coming to a head and I’ve been a bit preoccupied with that.’ He put his arm round his mother’s shoulders. ‘That’s all.’

  It was a week after Christmas and Cora was back at work. The change of scenery and good company had gone some way to help her feeling of loss and loneliness. After all, she thought, if I survived the loss of my parents, I can manage without Simon … most of the time, but in bed alone at night, she longed to feel his arms about her, see him smile, hear his voice.

  She didn’t do a great deal in the evenings apart from go to a cinema and lose herself in the film that was showing. Despite the fact that in her other life, she’d have walked into a bar alone – usually looking for punters without a second thought – now she didn’t feel comfortable doing it. In winter it was too cold to sit out on the fire escape, so she either listened to the wireless or read a book. Sometimes out of desperation, she’d wrap up warmly and walk. She would go window shopping, pop into a cafe and drink coffee whilst watching people, but every time she saw a couple together, she felt alone and abandoned.

  It was after such a walk one evening, she returned to her bedsit and stoked up the fire. Rubbing her hands together for warmth she then put on the kettle, hoping a hot drink would chase away the chill in her body. She was just about to pour the tea when there was a ring on her bell. She couldn’t imagine who would be calling, but she walked out to the main door and opened it.

  Simon stood there, his coat collar turned up against the cold.

  ‘Hello Cora. May I come in?’

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Cora was stunned to see Simon standing looking at her and for a moment she didn’t move or speak, then she stepped back and opened the door wider.

  ‘Come in,’ she said and as she walked away, she felt her legs trembling. She never thought she’d ever see Simon again and wondered why he was here.

  ‘I’ve just made a pot of tea, would you like some?’ she asked for something to say as he followed her into her bedsit.

  ‘That would be lovely, thank you. It’s bitterly cold outside. Would you like me to put some more coal on the fire?’

  ‘Yes, please,’ Cora said. ‘I’ve just come in and it needs building up again.’

  She watched him as she poured the tea. In one way, it was wonderful to see him, but she couldn’t bear it if he was offhand. He’d only break her heart again, just when she was beginning to get used to him not being around.

  They sat at the table. ‘How have you been? Did you have a good Christmas?’ he asked.

  ‘I’m fine and, yes, I did have a good Christmas; I went over to the island and stayed with Belle … and you?’

  He gave the old familiar smile she knew so well as he looked at her. ‘It was quiet, just with the family, but nice to have mum cook for me again.’

  She took a deep breath. ‘Why are you here, Simon?’

  He sat silently for a moment staring at her, his gaze so penetrating she was almost mesmerised by it. She waited.

  ‘Because I miss you. Not a day goes by that you are not in my thoughts. It’s driving me crazy.’

  ‘And?’

  ‘I went to the Horse and Groom when I was down in Southampton.’

  ‘Whatever for?’

  ‘I just wanted to try and understand you, the life you used to lead – the reason.’

  ‘You could have asked me,’ she said sharply. ‘You didn’t have to go round Southampton to pry. I would have told you everything you wanted to know, but you didn’t give me a chance. You made up your own mind – then you walked out.’

  ‘I can see you’re angry, Cora, and I don’t blame you, but it was just a shock. It took me a while to get over it.’

  ‘Really! And you a policeman. You of all people should know that sometimes things are not what they seem, but usually the people concerned have a right to defend themselves. You didn’t give me that right, did you? You were judge and jury. Guilty, my Lord!’ Getting up, she walked over to the window and looked out in an effort to calm down. She turned round.

  ‘You said you loved me Simon, but it wasn’t strong enough to try and understand me, was it? You know nothing about me. You know my body, but you don’t know me!’

  ‘I know how you lost your parents, your home and were left with nothing. I found that out in Southampton.’

  She wandered back to the table. ‘What else did you discover? That I was penniless, what I charged my punters? What services I offered? All you discovered, Simon, was how I survived. You didn’t learn anything about what went on in here!’ She thumped her breast. ‘You didn’t find out how much I loathed to feel a stranger’s hands on my body, how I had to pretend to like what they did to me. How I lied to boost their egos. You know nothing!’

  She was fighting back her tears. Tears of anger, tears for her lost years of innocence and her self-respect.

  He could hear the anguish in her voice, saw the tears brimming in her eyes and was at a loss to know what to do. ‘I’m really sorry, Cora. I didn’t mean to hurt you, honestly.’

  She took a handkerchief from her pocket and blew her nose. ‘But you did, Simon, and you’ve no idea how much. You broke my heart.’

  ‘Can you forgive me? Can we start again?’ He reached for her hand, but she withdrew it from his touch.

  She studied him, recognising the longing in his eyes. ‘I’m not sure that would work,’ she said quietly.

  ‘Why ever not?’

  ‘You would take me in your arms, make love to me, but in the back of your mind, you’d begin to wonder how many men had done the same before you. It would destroy us.’

  He didn’t answer because in his heart he knew she spoke the truth and Cora recognised his reluctance and the reason for it.

  ‘You see, I’m right. If you can’t put my past behind you, we wouldn’t have a chance.’ She rose to her feet. ‘I think it best that you leave, don’t you?’

  ‘Can’t we be friends at least?’ he asked.

  ‘Simon, it’s easy for friends to become lovers; it’s much more difficult for lovers to become friends. Let’s leave it like that.’

  Simon was at a loss to know how to change her mind. As he gazed at her, he knew he still loved her, but he could see from the steely look in her eyes that Cora had made up her mind. He wanted to reach out to her, to hold her and convince her that things would work out, but she stood rigid before him and he had no choice but to leave.

  Left alone, Cora sat at the table and finished her tea. Funny old world, she thought. She had wanted Simon so much, but when they had faced reality together the problem before them would have been too big to overcome. He was still too haunted by her past to make a future together possible. The realisation was hard to accept, but accept it she must and move on.

  It was now January and Hildy was due to sail to America and a new life. She’d been moved to a camp at Tidworth with the other GI brides before being taken to the docks to start her journey. She was sailing on the Queen Elizabeth and Cora and Belle were there to see her off.

  Bands played, streamers flew and, despite the cold, there was a festive air as those on the quayside sang songs. The railings on board the liner were crowded with women. Some waving, others crying and as Belle and Cora searched the faces, looking for their friend, they were in a panic in case they missed her.

  ‘There she is!’ yelled Belle and started waving madly whilst trying to point her out to Cora, who eventually saw her too. They shouted messages to Hildy who herself was yelling at the top of her
voice, neither could hear the other in the maelstrom of sailing day.

  Eventually the roar of the funnels filled the air, the band started to play ‘There’ll Always Be An England’. The stevedores let go the ropes after the gangways were taken in and the ship began to leave. Belle and Cora waved, tears streaming down their cheeks, still calling to their friend until it was time to leave.

  ‘Come on,’ said Belle, ‘I need a bloody drink after all that.’

  Half an hour later, the two women sat in a quiet corner of a bar with a couple of gin and tonics in front of them. They toasted their friend.

  ‘To Hildy!’ said Cora.

  ‘May she live a happy life!’ added Belle.

  The two then started to catch up on each other’s news. Cora told her friend about Simon’s visit and the consequences.

  ‘You sent him away?’ Belle was surprised.

  ‘He couldn’t forget about my past, Belle. He even came here to Southampton, checking me out. Asking questions! That’s a bit obsessive, don’t you think?’

  ‘Maybe it was because he loved you.’

  ‘Don’t, Belle. Leave it, please. I’ve made up my mind about Simon. He too is part of my past.’

  Her friend remained silent, but she was sorry, knowing how much Cora had loved the policeman.

  ‘Come on,’ Belle said, ‘let’s get something to eat before I catch a ferry back to the island.’ They left the bar in search of food.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Belle had settled well in Shanklin and was a happy woman. Having completed her house renovations, she started on the garden. With the help of a handyman, they had built a chicken house in the back and she’d purchased several laying hens, thinking the eggs would help with her catering and spread the rations. They had dug vegetable beds and planted potatoes, runner beans, onions, beetroot and carrots. It had been backbreaking but wholly therapeutic.