37 Days In A Strange World

by Dave Hazel

  Kurt feigned indignation. “Oh, wait a minute Sarge. You ain’t no Mr. Innocent.”

  “Never said I was, but just look in my record, you won’t find one bad thing.”

  “That’s cuz you never been caught,” Kurt argued playfully.

  “That’s right, and that’s the way it will stay.” Mykal said.

  SSgt (Staff Sergeant) Denny Felps rushed to their group. His hands were filled with paperwork. His face gave the impression that he had put in a double shift, but the morning just started. In his early thirties, Denny frequently said he ‘feels twice his age’. He started losing his hair and what remained began turning gray. He jokingly blamed his quick aging process on the six man squad under him. Denny wished he would have stayed out of the Air Force the first time he separated. Trying to find work to support a family of six forced him back in to the stability of the military.

  Denny’s squad consisted of Mykal, Boris, Kurt, Sam, Rich, and Sgt Larry Weston who hadn’t arrived yet. Denny’s team built a negative reputation for the many pranks pulled at the expense of others, on duty and off duty. Some destructive shenanigans were still unsolved, but the accusatory finger pointed back to Denny’s squad. As a squad they were the most disrespectful, foul mouthed, disgusting “un-military” people many of the ‘old-timers’ had ever seen.

  Some have argued they need to be split up and separated. The opposing view was to keep them in one group and not allow them to pollute other squads with their negative attitudes and their disrespect of discipline, honor and lack of devotion to the military structure.

  Denny, however, wouldn’t trade them for any others. When it came down to the performance of duties they were the best squad on Crew 4. Denny would stack them up to any squad in the squadron’s nine Crews. “They are individualists who won’t submit to the military’s narrow-minded gung-ho mentality,” he answered when asked what was wrong with his squad.

  “Boris, sign this,” Denny held a form out. “After you sign it give it to the LT or one of the FSS’s so they can file it. Myk, you wanna trade jobs?”

  “Noooooo thanks,” Mykal said and laughed at Denny’s tired face.

  “You wouldn’t believe some of the changes that idiot LT made a couple of days ago,” he whispered and quickly looked to make sure he wasn’t heard disrespecting the Crew’s only officer. “I’ve been here since five o’clock and the FSS’s have been here since four.”

  “For what?” They all replied in unison

  Suddenly a voice boomed in the hallway. “A meeting in the conference room in ten minutes. Squad leaders only,” barked the overweight Rob Mansfield. “I repeat, squad leaders, a meeting in ten minutes. Don’t be late.”

  “Damn it, as if I don’t have enough--” Denny grumbled and looked at his watch. “Hey, where the hell is Larry?”

  “You know Larry is never on time,” Boris said and blew smoke.

  “Give him, oh, twenty-five maybe thirty minutes, and maybe he’ll be here,” Sam laughed.

  “Don’t say that,” Denny groaned. “I’ve already had another chunk taken outta my ass this morning. You know, whenever you have a bad day, it just seems like everything else just falls apart?” He finally laughed showing the large gap between his front teeth.

  “Hey Denny, how come ol’ Mansfield sounded all pissed off?” Rich’s southern accent was followed by his never ending toothy smile. “I thought the big man ‘id be happy since he’s getting’ his last tour off.”

  “It’s not gonna be his last day,” Denny replied. “By all rights, he should get the tour off. We have more than enough supervisors. The back office doesn’t have a problem giving him the week off to start his retirement out processing, but Edwards said no. Mansfield’s buddy just screwed him one final time for the road,” he chuckled.

  “What a jerk,” Boris scoffed. “He’s been kissing the LT’s ass since the LT got here.”

  “What’s really bad about it,” Denny continued. “Jake’s qualified to take the Crew, plus now we have Finn, who’s taking Mansfield’s place, and he’s coming out with us this tour. Still, Edwards said no. He’s making Mansfield go out to the field one last time.”

  “That’ll be good,” Mykal chuckled. “They’ll be at each other’s throat all tour long.”

  “But listen to this,” Denny stopped them with a wave of his hand. “This is the real ass kicker. The LT’s reason for making Mansfield come out for one more tour is to make sure Finn is up to speed on the job. Finn has been doing the same job on a different Crew for a couple of years, plus Jake’s been doing it for a while now. So Jake could show Finn what Edwards wants. Even Miller, that spineless wimp, could show Finn what needs to be done on our Crew.”

  “Wow! That sucks man,” Kurt said.

  “Edwards just doesn’t want to give anyone any time off. I guess the way he sees it, if he can’t have any time off, then no one will have any time off. So this tour, we’re going to have an FSO and four FSS’s out in the field with us.”

  “Oh boy, that really sucks,” Boris blew smoke in the air. “That means we’ll have more chance of seeing these idiots since there’s so many of them.”

  Denny frowned and showed his annoyance. “Tell me about it. Ya wanna know another thing our great leader did? From now on, on the day we go out to the field, he and the FSS’s have to be here at four AM, and we squad leaders have to be here at five so we can all help each other get all paperwork and any other things done that needs to be done. Ya wanna know why?”

  “I’m afraid to ask,” Kurt said.

  “So we can all ride out to the field together.”

  “What?” They all asked sharing the same disbelief.

  “Yep, so we can all ride out to the field together like one big happy friggin family. From now on we all have to leave the base at the same time because Edwards wants to keep an eye on everyone. It doesn’t matter if four squads are ready to leave and one is not, we’ll all wait.”

  “What the hell is his problem?” Kurt bellowed.

  “Why does he want to micromanage everything?” Boris dragged on his cigarette.

  “And he mentioned something about stopping people smoking in the building.”

  “Gimme a break,” Boris sighed. “Are you kidding me?”

  “No I’m not. 1983 started off good,” Denny said. “But now it’s just gone to shit.”

  “How long do you think this will last?” Mykal asked calmly. “We’ve seen this kinda similar shit happen in the past. Someone gets a little taste of power and changes everything. The changes usually fade out and things would go back ‘to the way we’ve always done it.’ Ya know what I mean?”

  “I know what you’re saying,” Denny chuckled in response. “We’re having a meeting cuz all the squad leaders are pissed. We don’t wanna get here at five in the morning to do their damn work and then have to sit around here waiting for everyone else. We’re trying to get this nonsense stopped before it gets started.”

  “Give ‘em hell Denny.” Rich smiled and grabbed Denny shoulders for a mock massage.

  “And talking about the LT not giving any time off, he’s making us all go out with seven to each site when there’s no need. And he truly wants to know why morale is down.”

  “Man, I don’t understand this guy,” Sam raised his voice. “Our Crew being fat like this isn’t gonna last forever. He needs to get some damn sense and let some people have the tour off. I was planning on asking if I could get the tour off,” he joked.

  “Well you better watch your step.” Denny shook his head. “The LT’s really pissed off at you and Jake. He’s watching for either one of you to screw up so he can jump all over you.”

  “I know. I was only kidding.”

  “But you should have seem it,” Denny laughed slapping his thigh and looked to make sure he couldn’t be heard. Denny pushed his tongue through the gap in his teeth which normally happened in times of stress or nervousness. “When Mansfield found out that he wasn’t getting the tour off, he almost started
to cry. All morning long he’s been following the LT with his nose right up the LT’s ass, begging to have the tour off. He had made plans and now he can’t be there. It was funny guys. Mansfield was getting him coffee, telling him how good his uniform looked. In my whole life, I never saw a grown man do so much ass kissing in one morning.”

  “This has gotta change,” Kurt said.

  “Besides everything I just told you, I also have some bad news.” Denny frowned.

  “Bad news?” Boris said and rolled his eyes.

  “The LT is personally making some assignment changes. “Rich, you’re not coming out with us this tour. You’re going out with Doc’s squad.”

  “I can live with that,” Rich replied. “I like Doc, but is Sgt Black going to be there?”

  “You got it,” Denny let out a laugh when he saw the happiness drain from Rich. “And guess what? You’ll be working the same shift as Black, so watch yourself,” Denny’s humor ceased. “I overheard him talking to Doc and he’s looking for you to screw up on anything. He wants to nail you and I know how close you two are,” Denny added.

  “Aw damn it. C’mon Denny, get me outta it. Work that magic of yours,” Rich begged playfully. “Shake that little ass of yours for the sissy LT.”

  “Shhhh!” Denny held his hand up. “Shut up with that crap. I tried, but the LT is pissed off at me too. He jumped all over me, giving me a load of crap that I’m a poor supervisor and things had better change, blah, blah, blah.”

  Mykal, Boris, Kurt and Sam were all laughing at Rich. Sam laughed the loudest because of Rich’s intense hatred for Sgt Black. “Have fun,” Sam slapped Rich on the back. “You might have to do some ass kissing this tour.”

  “You shouldn’t be laughing either,” Denny turned to Sam. “You’re going out with ‘Dumb Shit’ Dobson’s squad. The LT wants you where he can keep an eye on you.”

  “Aw c’mon, Denny,” Sam protested, no longer laughing. “What the hell, man? Why Dobson’s squad? He’s honestly gotta be the dumbest idiot around here.”

  “Sam stopped laughin’ real quick, din’ he, y’all?” Rich laughed louder than Sam.

  “Uh oh, here comes that friggin Bible thumper,” Boris mumbled when Stanley ‘Ski’ Winczewski approached their group.

  “Not only is he a Jesus freak Bible thumper, but he’s mister ‘By the Book’,” Sam added. “I hate working with him cuz he always singing religious songs and wants to talk about that religious stuff,” he whispered as Ski got close.

  “Good morning, everyone,” SSgt Winczewski greeted them. “Hey Myk, do you have a minute?” He nodded implying they step away.

  “Sure, let’s go down here,” Mykal started down the hall. “What’s up, Ski?”

  Ski was the youngest staff sergeant on Crew 4 and was a friendly outgoing leader. His love of God compels him to witness and share God’s love with everyone as the opportunity presents itself. Ski knows most of the younger airmen laugh at him and mock him for his religious convictions, but he felt he has to be true to his heart by being true to his God. He knew the Air Force’s policies so Ski was careful not to “shove it down anyone’s throat” as he had so often been accused of. But if anyone asks him a question Ski will take the time to answer the question ‘thoroughly’.

  “I know this is going to sound strange to you, Myk, but I have to share it with you,” Ski nervously tapped his fingers together. “I had a dream about you last night and when I woke up I couldn’t go back to sleep,” he paused as if awaiting a response.

  Mykal looked stunned. “Ski, we gotta stop meeting like this,” he joked uneasily.

  “No, no, nothing like that Myk,” he gasped in wide eyed disbelief. Ski was uncomfortable with crude sexual humor. “I don’t fully understand what the meaning of my dream was, but I do believe God can speak to people through their dreams. There is evidence of it in the Bible, so I believe it. To make a long story short, I think God wants me to let you know, that I support you, and that I am going to support you.”

  “Support me in what?”

  Ski blushed. He looked like he felt out of place. “I don’t know.”

  “What the hell? Ooops, I mean, what the heck Ski?”

  “I know it sounds strange, but after I woke up, I prayed all night for God to give me some kind of clarity. The only response I felt I got out of my prayer time was that I need to let you know that I’m here for you and that I’m to support you and help you. I don’t even know if its military related or not. Even though I outrank you, God told me I’m supposed to support you.”

  Mykal stared at Ski, speechless. His thoughts reverted to his ‘gut feeling’ when he woke.

  “Do you have any upcoming plans? Are you going to separate when your time is up?”

  “Not that I know of,” Mykal answered.

  “Are you and Pam looking to have another child or maybe buy a house down town?”

  Mykal continued to shake his head. “No. Not that I know of.”

  “Well, I’ll keep praying about it and as soon as I feel God gives me--”

  “Ski, you know I’m not a church going man, right?” Mykal cut him off and didn’t like this at all. He wondered if he should mention the premonition he had this morning.

  “I know. I’m just being obedient to what I feel God has laid on my heart. If you think I’m being foolish, that’s fine. I would rather man think I’m a fool for being obedient, than for God to think I’m a fool for being disobedient.”

  “Ski, you’re starting to scare the crap outta me,” he joked to make this end.

  “I didn’t mean to,” Ski said and lowered his eyes.

  “Well, if you figure out what this is all about, let me know,” Mykal said. He wondered if God would want him to stay home from work today, but why would God use Ski to tell him?

  “Squad leaders,” Jake’s voice boomed in the hallway. “In the conference room, now!”

  “I gotta go. I can’t be late,” Ski said. He turned and ran.

  Mykal joined his friends just as Denny turned for the conference room. “Denny, real quick, if Rich and Sam aren’t coming with us, who’s taking their places with us?”

  “This week we added a couple of ‘newbie’s’ to the Crew. They’re right out of tech school and their first time to the field. The ‘new meat’ is coming with us,” he explained while walking backward. “I’ll tell ya more later. Boris, get on the phone and call Larry’s house. Tell him if he hasn’t left yet, I’m gonna stick my boot up his ass.”

  Jake stuck his head out the conference room door. “Denny, the lieutenant is waiting on you. Move it,” he barked. Jake rolled his eyes showing his harsh tone was for Lt Edwards’s benefit.

  “I’m coming, I’m coming,” he moaned. “This is gonna be one of ‘those days’.”

  “Hey Jake,” Sam yelled to his older drinking buddy, but Jake ducked back inside the room before Sam could fire off an obscenity or anything Jake would have to respond to. They all laughed. “So Myk, what did nut case, Ski, want?”

  “I don’t know,” Mykal laughed with them. “You know how he is.” He didn’t want to explain the conversation or the strange warning he sensed earlier.

  “Yeah, he wants to convert your ass, Myk,” Boris laughed and lit up another cigarette. “You know two of the airmen on his squad have become religious nuts like him, right? He’s trying to get you to be a Christian like them. Some call his office St. Mary’s Cathedral.”

  “No he’s not. I already told him I’m not into that church going stuff.”

  “Yeah, but he brainwashed those two idiots on his squad. Now he’s got his sights on a sergeant,” Boris added. “I just hope one day you don’t come to the field doing the Hail Mary stuff or whatever the hell those Christian idiots do.”

  “Man Sarge, that must mean Boris thinks you’re an idiot who can be brainwashed,” Kurt joked and laughed out loud.

  “Listen dumb ass,” Mykal fired back. “Do you want me to make it so you can work with his squad this tour? Cuz you know he�
��s mister ‘By the Book’, and he’ll run your ass ragged.”

  Kurt playfully snapped to attention. “I’m sorry Sir. That foolish talk will never come from my mouth again, Sir,” Kurt said and saluted him.

  “That’s better, cuz I’ll make your friggin life miserable for you, you goof,” Mykal laughed. Mykal would never opt to work with anyone other than Kurt and Boris.

  “It’s about time you got here,” Boris said when Sgt Larry Weston walked through the front doors. “Denny was looking for you. And we were just getting ready to call you.”

  “I think Edwards wants to see you too,” Kurt said.

  “Yeah,” Sam agreed. “I heard Mansfield saying something about the LT being pissed off at you cuz you shaved your head bald when he told you to get a haircut. Man, I still can’t believe you did it,” he laughed when Larry removed his beret exposing his skin head.

  “Forget him,” Larry laughed while taking off the large sunglasses the lieutenant warned him not to wear while in uniform. “Forget him and that fat assed, butt-buddy, friend of his, Mansfield.” Larry snickered while rubbing his smooth head. Larry’s Boston accent sounded as thick as Rich’s southern accent.

  “Dem ol’ boys said you shaved your head just to spite him,” Rich said.

  “If he says anything to me, I’ll just tell him I got bugs and had to shave my head. Then I’ll try to stand near him all the time and keep scratching my head,” Larry said generating laughter from his friends. “I’ll betcha any money he’ll stay the hell away from me.”

  “You’re crazy,” Sam laughed.

  “We didn’t have the inspection yet, did we?” Larry asked Mykal and began to laugh.

  “No, not yet, but it’s gonna be funnier than hell,” Mykal laughed at Larry’s excitement.

  “What’s so funny Sarge? What’s up?” Kurt pried.

  “Nothing’s up,” Larry lied. His large, heavy, frame bounced with his happiness. Larry had always been right at the maximum allowable weight for his height. He weighed more than Boris, but he didn’t look as plump as Boris. “Do you think he found it yet?” He asked Mykal as if the others weren’t present.