by Tina Susedik
“Come on, Cassie. You’re telling me that once in a while a lie like the one Jazmine told can hurt?”
“That’s exactly what I’m saying.”
“What about little white lies?”
“What good do they do?” Cassie asked. “Eventually they turn into big white lies and then into mammoth black ones that do nothing but ruin lives.”
Hogan sat back in his booth and set his napkin on the table. “Whoa. Wait just a minute. We’re talking about a three-year-old who just wanted to feel important to someone.”
“No we’re not. You mentioned white lies. I don’t care if they’re white, purple, green, or orange. Lies are lies and do nothing but cause problems. The earlier kids learn this, the better off they will be.” Cassie took a sip from her drink and slammed the cup on the table.
Billy whimpered. Without thinking, Hogan reached over, popped the tray from the high chair, and lifted him into his arms.
“Okay. Let’s say a friend came to work one day wearing a horrendous, bright purple dress.” He rubbed Billy’s back. “It’s shaped like a gunnysack with large yellow flowers and a pea-green ruffle around the bottom. On her feet she is wearing a pair of glittering red shoes.”
He leaned toward Cassie, placing Billy’s bottom on the table. “Now, when she asks what you think about her outfit, aren’t you going to tell her a little white lie so you don’t hurt her feelings?” He was satisfied when her lips twitched.
“Hogan, I would find something good about that dress. Maybe the neckline shows off her graceful neck. Or the green brings out the color of her eyes. It could be the red shoes show off her slim ankles.” She leaned across the table, smoothed Billy’s hair. “But, I would never tell a lie.”
Hogan swallowed around the lump building in his throat. He wanted to pursue a relationship with Cassie for the job, and for himself if he wanted to be honest, but with her feelings about lying, what would happen if she found out about his job? He was living a lie. His whole life was one.
But then, he hadn’t really told a lie, had he? He’d simply failed to mention the exact truth. That wasn’t the same thing, was it? But then, undercover agents didn’t have the option to reveal their lives to anyone. He wanted Cassie to get to know him first as a person. Maybe by then she would like him so much, his lie, or untruth, wouldn’t seem so bad.
“Wouldn’t that be a lie of omission?” he asked.
Cassie frowned. “A lie of omission?”
“Let’s say your friend went out on a date with this great guy. The next day you wanted to find out all the details.” Hogan truly hoped Cassie would get the point of this. “But she only told you about going out to dinner and a movie, but not what happened when they went back to her place. Did she lie to you because she didn’t tell you everything?”
Emotions crossed her face as she considered his words.
“You’re good with children, Hogan,” Cassie said, changing the subject.
Hogan was glad the lie discussion was dead. He smiled into Cassie’s eyes. “From what I’ve heard and seen so far, you’re not so bad, either.”
“You wouldn’t say that if you had seen how nervous I was all day wondering what to do with them next. I was afraid I’d royally mess things up. This is the first time I’ve had all three at my house for a weekend.” Cassie laughed. “If you could see my living room right now, you’d know how we literally messed things up.”
“I think it’s important to let kids play and make messes.” Hogan gave Billy a fry. “I had an aunt who had a fit if her kids left anything out of place. My cousins couldn’t do anything in her house. I hated going there to visit.”
“I take it that your mother let you and your sisters run wild?”
Hogan laughed. “Hardly. My two sisters and brother and I were allowed to play anywhere in the house, except my parents’ bedroom. We made forts, did experiments, and cooked, but she made darn sure we cleaned up, too.”
Cassie thought about the blanket tent she’d made for the girls. Before her father died, he would help them do fun things like build tents and forts, make tire swings, play hopscotch, and simply be there for her and her sister. Then things changed. Annie had been too busy making a living to help them be creative.
“Sounds like you had a nice childhood, Hogan.” Did she sound envious? Well, she was. Her inner mother sighed when Billy fussed and Hogan placed her nephew on his shoulder and patted his back tenderly.
“I did. My parents were great. Still are, actually.” Hogan smiled at the fond memories. “If we didn’t understand something and they didn’t know the answer, they would search until they did. Sometimes we’d forget the question before they had the answer. It taught us never to give up until an explanation was found. What about your folks?”
Cassie recalled her mother’s demands to keep quiet so she could sleep between jobs. How Cassie learned to cook at a young age so she and her sister would have warm meals while Annie worked. She never felt comfortable talking about her childhood.
Hogan switched Billy from one shoulder to the other.
“I think the little tyke is tired,” Cassie said, glad to change the subject.
Hogan shook out his arm. “Man, they get heavy when they conk out.”
Cassie glanced at the clown clock on the wall. “No wonder he’s asleep. It’s seven-thirty. I’d better get the girls.”
By the time Cassie came back with Emily and Jazmine, Hogan had Billy bundled into his coat.
Upon seeing their sleeping brother, her nieces suddenly became like wet noodles, hanging on her, asking for help with their coats. “Sheesh, two seconds ago they were laughing and playing like there was no tomorrow.”
“My nieces and nephews are like that, too. One second they’re tearing around my parents’ house, chasing each other like wild gazelles, the next they’re passed out right where their batteries ran down.”
Cassie smiled at the image as she picked up Jasmine, took Emily’s hand, and headed toward the door.
With his free arm, Hogan held the door open so Cassie and her nieces could pass through.
“Are we almost to the car yet?” Emily mumbled, leaning against her aunt hard enough to make Cassie list to the left.
“We’re here, sweetheart.” Cassie unlocked the car. “C’mon, climb in.”
Once she made sure everyone was safely buckled, Cassie walked around the car to the driver’s side and opened the door.
“You know you don’t have to go with us tomorrow.”
Hogan smiled, his dimples growing deep. “I want to. It should be an experience taking three children to the zoo.”
“I just don’t want you to feel obligated just because the girls asked you to come along.”
“I don’t feel obligated at all. And don’t forget, I do love monkeys. What time should I pick you guys up?”
“I think the zoo opens at eleven.” Hogan’s grin make her heart hitch. “If we leave at ten-thirty most of the early traffic should have disappeared by the time we get there.”
“Ten-thirty is fine. Do you have strollers?”
Cassie’s heart dropped. “Darn. That’s one thing Bess didn’t leave. How are we going to manage three kids with no strollers? She didn’t leave me a key to her house.”
“Don’t worry, we can rent some at the zoo. Are you going to be able to get the kids into the house alone? Would you like me to follow you and help?”
“I’ll be okay.” Cassie slid behind the steering wheel and started the engine.
Hogan put his hands on the top of the door, his gaze resting on her lips. She could tell he wanted to kiss her good night again, but she’d made it awkward by getting into the car.
“Well, I guess I’ll see you at ten-thirty tomorrow morning then.” He slapped the car roof.
Hogan shut the
door and stood in the parking lot watching her drive away. Having Cassie and the kids with him at the zoo would help his cover. Since all he was doing was observing Angelino, no one would be in any danger.
While probably not a good idea at this point in his life, he was hopeful their day together would guide him into a relationship with a very special woman. Lighthearted, hands in his pant pockets, he whistled as he strolled to his car. The only thing marring his happiness was the knowledge of his “untruth.”
At least he could kill two birds with one stone at the zoo tomorrow. Spend time with Cassie while scoping out the suspect.
By the time he got to his Corvette, he had himself convinced he was justified in what he did and hummed all the way to his cold, lonely condo.
Chapter 7
Billy fussed and fought Cassie as she tried to wipe mashed bananas from his face. “C’mon, squirt. Let’s get this done and over with so we can get ready for the zoo.” Adding excitement to her voice and pantomiming a monkey, she added, “Billy wants to go to the zoo, doesn’t he?”
Billy quit fussing and giggled.
“Luckily he’s easily distracted.” She lifted him from the highchair, eyed the kitchen clock, and turned to the girls. “We have one hour to get ready for Hogan. If you all behave and do what you’re told, we’ll make it in plenty of time. Emily, Jazmine, I want you to watch cartoons while I wash and dress Billy. Don’t move from the couch. When I’m done with him, I’ll help you two get ready.”
Anyway, she hoped they would be ready on time. Besides people telling lies, her other pet peeve was people being late, including herself. And here she was, still in yellow slippers and ratty robe. Her hair was swept from her face with the green knee sock again. Last night she’d had good intentions for the morning, including waking early, taking a shower, and getting herself spiffed up before the kids woke.
After yesterday, she was hoping the kids wouldn’t wake at the crack of dawn, but no such luck. Putting them to sleep so early yesterday had probably been a mistake. Cassie sighed and watched as Emily and Jazmine dutifully climbed on the couch. If she hurried, she would have at least half an hour to get ready. Not much time to make herself glamorous, but at least she’d be clean and presentable.
With Billy slung on her hip, Cassie left the living room and headed for the stairs. Just as she put a foot on the bottom step, the doorbell rang. Jazmine raced for the door, and with a sense of déjà vu, called out, “Young lady, don’t you dare open that door.”
Hogan waited on Cassie’s front steps. Except for the time of day, it was déjà vu all over again. He glanced at his watch.
“Good,” he muttered. “Ten-thirty. Right on time. Hopefully that’ll count for something.” Last night, after their discussion about lying, he felt as if he needed to rack up brownie points. Today he’d try and total up as many as possible.
Hogan tapped his foot impatiently on the white porch floor and contemplated what the day would be like. He was sure they’d have fun. Supper last night was enjoyable, the kids great to be with, the conversation with Cassie interesting.
By the time they were done wandering over the vast grounds of the Milwaukee County Zoo, the kids would probably be exhausted and ready to crash when they got home. That would give Cassie and him time to get to know each other better. It was something he was truly looking forward to.
Suppressing a yawn, he leaned against a pillar holding up the sloped porch roof. He hadn’t slept much again last night and woke up early trying to figure out what it was about her that set him off like a randy teenager.
He reached out for a second ring on the doorbell, when the porch vibrated with pounding of feet. Cassie’s yell echoed through the door. Like Friday night, the door was yanked open and Jazmine smiled up at him. This time Cassie didn’t seem surprised, but shocked.
Eyes wide, she stepped behind her niece. “H-Hogan, what are you doing here already?”
Billy, still in his sleeper, sitting on her forearm, tugged on her ponytail. Hogan tried to suppress a smile as he took in Cassie’s attire. Yellow bird slippers on a grown woman? Somehow, that and her tattered robe made her seem more real than the women from his past. They spent so much time trying to be seductive and elegant, they totally missed being wholesome and real. He was tired of seduction and elegance. He loved that Cassie was real.
“What do you mean already?” He glimpsed his watch again. “You told me ten-thirty. That’s what time it is.”
She held the top of her robe together, scooted behind the door, and peered around it. “Hogan, it’s only nine-thirty. You shouldn’t be here for another hour.”
Damn it all anyway. He’d grabbed the wrong watch this morning because he’d been too busy thinking about the day to pay attention to what he was doing. “I am so sorry. I grabbed my East Coast watch. I’m running on the wrong time.”
“East Coast watch?” Her brows dipped together. “Don’t you have any clocks in your house with the right time?”
Could the earth just open up and swallow him whole? “Well, no, I don’t. The first thing I do in the morning is slip on my watch. That’s what I go by all day. It seems as if no two clocks are set for the same time.”
He didn’t want to explain how he had a watch for different time zones. With as much traveling he did, he found it frustrating trying to reset his digital watch every time he hit a new zone. He was digitally watch impaired.
“Well, I’d say your watch is set at a different time all right. As far as I know, we’re in Central time.” Her smile lit up her face and warmed his heart. “Yours seems to be slightly fast.”
Hogan ran his fingers through his hair. “Look, I’m sorry. Should I leave and come back in an hour?”
The way his dark hair flopped back into place, a small curl falling across his forehead, fascinated Cassie. Her fingers itched to sweep those thick, dark strands back into place.
What the heck. He’d seen her smeared with strained baby carrots, tired with dark circles under eyes and no makeup, what difference did it make if he saw her dressed like a slob? At least this way, hopefully he would like her for who she was not what she wore, whether it be carrots or yellow bird slippers and a green sock.
She swung the front door open wider. “Of course not. Come in. If you don’t mind, you can sit and watch cartoons with the girls while I get Billy ready.”
Hogan stepped into the living room and nearly fell over as Jasmine jumped up and down, then grabbed him around the legs. “Mr. Hogan, Mr. Hogan. Is it a bootiful day like you said? Are we really gonna go to the zoo?”
Cassie cringed at her nieces exuberance and was about to chastise them when Hogan peeled Jazmine from his legs and swung her into his arms.
“It sure is, sweetie. I bet those mommy and daddy monkeys are getting their children all spiffed up for all the little girls coming to visit today. Are you ready?”
“We hafta watch ‘toons while Auntie Susie gives Billy a bath. He gots ‘nanas in his hair. Then it’s our turn. Wanna watch ‘toons with us?”
Emily scooted over to make room for him. Once seated, Jazmine climbed on Hogan’s lap.
“You go ahead and get ready, Cassie. I’ll just sit here and enjoy . . . whatever cartoon this is.”
Seeing that all eyes were glued to the television set, Cassie left the room. Just as she reached the stairs, she heard Hogan whisper to the girls, “A green sock? Girls, why does your aunt wear a green sock in her hair?” The girls giggled, and Hogan joined.
His deep chuckle wrapped around her heart and settled in her stomach. She wanted to turn around and give them the stink-eye, the kind her mother and sister said could melt a bar of gold. Unlike her ex who would have been serious with a comment about the sock, she knew by his laugh he was teasing.
With a light heart, she lifted the bottom of her robe and climbed the steps as regal
ly as royalty. Well, as regally as someone carrying a wiggling child could.
The bathroom door clicked shut and Hogan made a quick decision. “Hey, Emily.”
“What?” she asked, never taking her eyes from the television.
“I’m afraid I made a big mistake this morning by getting here too early. Your aunt is a little upset with me.”
Emily narrowed her eyes, crossed her arms over her chest, and shook her head. How could someone so little make him feel like such a heel? Must be a female trait.
“Could you and Jazmine help me get on her good side?”
Her eyes lit up. “We’ll help you, Mr. Hogan. Won’t we, Jaz?”
Jazmine popped her thumb from her mouth. “Yup.”
“Do you and Jazmine have to take a bath this morning?” He felt Jazmine shake her head against his chest.
“Nope. We’re clean already.”
“Good. Do you guys know where your clothes are?”
Both girls bobbed their heads, reminding Hogan of the little plastic dogs with spring necks bouncing on the dashboards of cars.
“Okay. Do you think you can sneak upstairs, as quiet as two little mice, and get your clothes?”
Heads bounced again.
“Great. Bring what you’re going to wear down here, and we’ll get you dressed. When Aunt Cassie comes down she’ll be so surprised and happy she’ll give us all kisses.” He hoped so, anyway.
Before he could say anything else, the girls jumped up and raced for the stairs. “Girls. Wait!” Hogan put a finger to his lips. “Remember, little mice. Tiptoe.” He chuckled as the girls stepped across the room, bent at the waist, tiptoeing as if they were walking on eggs, each with a finger against her lips.
