“Is she still at the farm?”
“No, she’s here in Philadelphia staying with her parents.”
Susan closed her eyes.
“Susan, are you all right?”
“Yes, yes of course.” Susan cleared her throat. “Has Gerald called on her then?”
“No, why on earth would he?”
“Well, maybe it will just take time and some persuasion to convince her to marry him. Surely he won’t give up that easily. She certainly seemed to love that farm.”
“He won’t lower himself, Susan. Mary was quite clear that should would not entertain a marriage to Mike’s brother. There’s simply no hope. Gerald was more angry than I’ve ever seen him.” Eloise shivered. “I don’t dare to bring it up again.”
“I see. Well, I’m sorry it didn’t work out the way you’d hoped, Eloise. Now, let’s discuss the church supper, shall we?”
But Susan’s mind was on anything but the church supper. Her hopes that Gerald would be engaged to Mary were dashed. Now what was she going to do?
* * *
Susan couldn’t wait for Eloise to leave. She’d seen Lee enter the house and head straight for his father’s study. The last thing she wanted was for him to see Eloise Trost talking with her.
Lee had the uncanny ability to read people and intentions—he’d always been an insightful child—and there was no doubt in her mind that he would somehow know that she’d been up to something if he saw them together. Eloise was a friend, but not someone Susan typically spent time with.
“I’m sorry to rush Eloise, but I have several errands to run this afternoon. Let’s plan to formalize our plans another day, if that works for you?”
“Yes, of course. I’ve taken up enough of your time,” Eloise agreed affably as she stood and made her way toward the French doors.
Susan moved around her to open the door and came face-to-face with Lee. He stood there with his grey assessing eyes, his arms crossed, his expression unreadable. Susan hesitated, her eyes drawn inexplicably to her son’s, her cheeks flushed. She didn’t want to open the door, but the entire situation would be awkward otherwise, and she mustn’t let on that anything was amiss, despite what her son may be thinking.
She opened the French doors and stiffened her back. “Lee dear, you remember Mrs. Trost? She and I are on a Church committee together and were just discussing details.”
Lee’s eyes rested on his mother’s for a moment more, but not too long that he would be considered rude. He turned his gaze on Eloise. “Mrs. Trost, it’s a pleasure to see you again.”
Eloise’s smile froze on her face at the intense assessment from Lee Jamison. She had heard accolades about his work in psychiatry, and if this was his approach to patients, no wonder he had them baring their souls when no one else had been able to reach them. “Doctor Jamison,” she murmured.
Lee’s eyes moved from his mother to Mrs. Trost and his brow furrowed. Both women then scurried toward the front door as though caught doing something naughty. Lee waited until Mrs. Trost left and watched his mother slowly turn toward him.
“Were you just on your way out?” She suggested, unable to hide the hopeful lilt in her voice.
Lee didn’t respond, he simply watched her.
“I’m just on my way out to run errands,” she offered meekly.
Without a word Lee strode toward the door, opened it, turned to give his mother a final once over, and then left.
Susan jumped when her husband called her name from his study seconds later. Worrying her lower lip, she made her way there.
“Please sit down, Susan, there’s something we need to discuss,” he told her.
She did as he asked and looked at him meekly.
“Are you all right?” He asked, unaware of what had transpired with their son moments before.
“Yes,” she replied.
“Are you sure?”
Lee’s father was a physician, as well—a surgeon. He was retired now, and although Lee had gleaned his love for medicine from his father, they were nothing alike. Lee’s skills in reading people were nearly unparalleled, whereas his father had been an excellent surgeon simply because he never got involved with a patient’s feelings or personal life. They were like night and day.
“Yes, I’m sure,” she muttered. “What did you want to see me about?”
He sighed. “Lee has informed me that he intends to court Mary Hawarden Trost.”
Susan gasped.
“Yes, I knew this would not be news that would make you happy, however, I expect you to respect our son’s wishes. Do you understand me?”
“Did you even try to dissuade him?” She accused.
“No,” he admitted. “Our son knows his mind, and it is quite made up where Mary is concerned. Do not cause trouble, am I clear?”
“Yes, of course.”
“Are you sure you’re all right, dear? You look a bit pale.”
“I’m just a bit tired is all. I may lie down for an hour before running my errands.” She stood and walked toward the solid mahogany door that kept her husband’s study private from the rest of the house, and closed it quietly behind her.
Chapter 24
Philadelphia, PA
“It’s wonderful to have my entire family all together again,” Mary and Claire’s mother effused for the third time that night.
The sisters shared a secret look and a smile, and Jim smirked. Their mother had been trying to get the entire family back to Philadelphia since Mary had gone to Bareglen Creek three years ago. She had sent Claire to Bareglen Creek to persuade Mary to come home to Philadelphia after Mike had died—but instead Claire fell in love with the sheriff, and had ended up staying in Bareglen Creek, as well. It was an immensely painful time for their mother, but she was happy now that Jim and Mary were home permanently, and Claire and Sully returned frequently due to his work helping the governor of Philadelphia with the formation of a new branch of law enforcement that would connect throughout the entire United States.
Claire and Sully were in Philadelphia currently for at least several weeks, called back by the governor to consult locally because of a new rash of crimes being committed in the city—violent crimes. There was even talk of a possible serial killer.
Claire confided in Mary that Sully was involving Lee Jamison in the case, as well, hopeful for any insight he could provide into the perpetrator of the murders. Evidently, inviting a psychiatrist to consult was not popular with Philadelphia’s law enforcement community, but that had never stopped Sully before and it wouldn’t stop him now. He always followed the path he believed was right, regardless of the opinions of others. It was one of the aspects that made him a great leader, and a man that other men followed, and would give their lives for.
Mary found her thoughts shifting to the handsome psychiatrist. He had visited her a few times since she’d been back in Philadelphia, but those visits had always seemed purely professional in nature. Each time she had tried to tamper down her hopes and expectations that it might turn to more.
Tomorrow evening she would be his guest at a University of Pennsylvania lecture, and her stomach fluttered at the thought. She could imagine him standing in front of the large lecture hall, distinguished in a dark suit, his gray eyes all-knowing as his eyes roamed the audience, the audience mesmerized as he delivered his address.
“Mary? Mary!” Mrs. Hawarden called her daughter’s name a second time. “I finally have my family together at the dinner table and your mind is off wandering,” she scolded.
Claire caught Mary’s eye and raised one eyebrow. Mary narrowed her eyes at her in warning. She didn’t want to discuss where her thoughts had been and was grateful when Claire distracted her mother with questions about the upcoming Church fair.
I mustn’t let my mind get away with me, she reminded herself. His interest is purely platonic and professional.
Mary caught Jim’s watchful eyes on her. She offered him a quick smile. He worried about her too much. Collectivel
y they’d decided not to let Mary’s parents know the extent to which she’d been ill before returning to Philadelphia. Mary didn’t want them to worry, and Claire and Jim had acquiesced, not wanting to cause undue stress on Mary.
Since returning to Philadelphia, Mary had found Lee’s thought-provoking questions to help her dig a bit deeper into the reasons behind her guilt, and lately he’d been asking questions that delved into her personal hopes and desires. She hadn’t told anyone that over the last few days she’d begun to realize that although she loved Mike deeply, their marriage had been a source of stress in her life.
It had been a difficult realization.
Mary had found that, as a middle child, she had tried to be everything Mike needed in addition to fulfilling her responsibilities at the orphanage and the children. Preparing lessons, teaching the children, and trying to adapt the lessons to a wide range of ages had been stressful. Add to that the fact that Mike’s dream was owning a farm, and the work that required—and Mary had found herself overwhelmed while trying to please everyone around her.
Lee had helped her realize this, and he had tenderly suggested that it was a husband’s responsibility to help his wife, not overwhelm her. He hadn’t criticized Mike—he would never do that—but he had given her pause and insight into what she deserved from a marriage and husband. He’d done it in such a way that she didn’t even realize he was doing it until she’d thought back on their time together several days later.
Those insights and her choice to open herself up to examining everything that led her to living with immense guilt and sadness for nearly eighteen months, were serving to make her more self-aware, and more honest with herself.
Looking back she could see where it had all snowballed to the point where she was nearly crippled.
Mary smiled, looking around the table at her family. She finally felt more complete and at peace than she had felt in a very long time. She finally felt ready to move forward.
Chapter 25
Philadelphia, PA
She felt as though misery might overwhelm her; looking around the dining room table, her husband sat stoically at the head of the table, and she at the other end. Gerald had joined them for dinner tonight, but he was agitated and angry. He was that way more often than not lately—ever since that dreadful Mary Hawarden had unequivocally turned down the opportunity to marry him in order to keep her beloved farm.
Eloise could tell that her son was letting it fester in his already dark soul.
“Eloise,” her husband’s cruel voice broke through her worry. “Stop dawdling with the food on your plate and eat it. I’m ready for my dessert.”
“Yes, of course, dear,” she meekly agreed as she rose to remove the dishes.
“I said eat it,” he threatened.
She hastily sat back in her chair. “I’m not feeling well,” she admitted, watching his response.
“Then go to your room. There’s no sense in Gerald or me getting sick because you’re too selfish to stay away from us.”
“Yes, of course, I’m sorry.” She rose to remove her plate.
“Leave it. The cook can clear the table.”
His tone of voice and look of disgust sent her scrambling toward the exit.
“Where do you think you’re going? I didn’t excuse you, Gerald.”
There was a mean gleam in her husband’s eyes, and she knew what that meant. Gerald was an adult now, but it didn’t stop her from trying to protect him as she always had.
“I don’t think cook’s meal was quite up to par.” Eloise wrung her hands, guilt clawed at her chest for putting cook in the direct line of fire, but she had to protect their son. “Please don’t blame Gerald for that,” she nearly begged.
“Out of my sight!” He bellowed. “You’re both ungrateful, and neither of you deserve the food I work hard to put on this table.”
Gerald rose from his chair without a glance at his father, but Eloise worried at the cruel gleam in her son’s eye. He walked out of the dining room and headed for the front door.
“Gerald, where are you going?” His mother asked.
“Out,” he spat, taking a menacing step toward her.
She backed away.
“You were sent to your room, wench,” he growled.
Eloise turned and fled toward her room, somehow knowing that something was about to go horribly wrong tonight.
* * *
Gerald stalked toward the barn and saddled his horse. He grabbed the knife he kept hidden behind the tack room, his eyes unseeing. Darkness clouded his vision and built up in his chest until he thought he might explode. Lately there was one thing that provided him with relief, even if the relief was short lived.
He’d been at the market this morning when he saw her—his brother’s widow. She’d been the death of Mike. She was evil and it wasn’t right that she lived when Mike didn’t. She was the reason he lost his brother. Hatred weighed him down, nearly drowning him.
He’d overheard Mary talking to her sister about how excited she was to attend a lecture at the University of Pennsylvania tonight. She’d paddled on and on about some doctor. Just the memory of her voice grated him—she didn’t deserve happiness—and tonight he would make sure she got exactly what she deserved.
Chapter 26
Philadelphia, PA
Claire fussed around Mary, straightening her gown and tucking the final tendril into the clip that held her long, silky hair. “You look beautiful,” she murmured.
Mary tampered down her hopes. “It’s just a lecture, sis, not a date.”
Claire smiled at her. “Come on, let’s go, Mother is waiting downstairs.”
Mary bit her bottom lip. Remember Mary, this is not a date. It’s just a lecture. It’s just a lecture.
Mary and Claire made their way down the stairs, then toward the parlor where Mary’s mother, father, Jim, and Sully waited. It embarrassed her that they were making so much of this, but she loved them just the same. It felt good to have the weight of the world off her shoulders, and to feel happy.
Mary entered the parlor and twirled. Her mother had tears in her eyes, as she rose to take her hand. Jim and Mr. Hawarden rose, and Sully leaned against the far wall.
“You look beautiful, Mary,” her mother assured her as her family formed a circle around her.
“Thanks, Mother,” Mary’s cheeks reddened under their perusal.
Sully moved into the circle. “Mary, Joseph will drive you to the university in the carriage. Promise me that you will stay with the carriage until you are at the lecture hall entrance. Lee has assured me that he will escort you home after the lecture.”
“Yes, of course, Sully,” Mary waved away his concern and made a final twirl toward the door, her eyes sparkling.
Sully couldn’t shake the feeling that something wasn’t right. “Maybe I should take you,” he offered.
“Don’t be silly,” Mary frowned. “Stay here with Claire and my parents. Joseph is perfectly capable of getting me to the lecture. There will be loads of people there, Sully. I’ll be fine.” She stopped short of adding that they were definitely over protective.
Jim opened the door and escorted Mary down the steps where Joseph took her hand to help her into the carriage. Joseph had been with her family for as long as Mary could remember, and she knew she was perfectly safe with him.
“She’s impetuous, Joseph. Don’t let her out until you are at the steps to the lecture hall.”
“Yes, sir,” Joseph nodded his agreement and flicked the reins.
Mary chatted the entire way to the University. If Joseph minded, he didn’t give any indication. The gas lanterns lit the street and everything looked so beautiful. Mary felt as though she were seeing the city for the very first time, even though it hadn’t changed since she’d been here last—but she had changed.
Butterflies swirled in her stomach and she groaned when the carriage stopped behind a long line of other carriages. “The lecture must be a popular one,” she could bar
ely keep the whine out of her voice. The lecture was scheduled to start soon, and at this point she’d be late.
“Joseph, I’m getting out here,” she declared.
“No Miss Mary, I’ve been given strict instructions to let you out at the steps to the lecture hall, and they are not even in sight.”
“Joseph,” Mary argued, “I’ll never make it to the lecture in time if we wait behind all these carriages. I’m surrounded by people and perfectly safe,” she assured him as she shifted to the end of the carriage.
“But Miss Mary!”
“No more arguments, Joseph,” she insisted. “Thank you for the ride. I’ll see you tomorrow,” she assured him as she carefully pulled her gown up, grabbed the bar at the end of the carriage, and lowered herself down each step. She waved as she made her way through the crowds, past buildings, toward the lecture hall.
She paused when she thought she heard a cry—or was it a meow? Yes, there it was again. Something was in distress. She edged toward the alleyway between two buildings and the mewing grew louder. Oh goodness, what could cause a cat to make that noise? It must be hurt, she decided, hesitating before making her way into the dark between the two buildings.
Suddenly she felt a hand cover her mouth and she stilled. Then something cracked on her head, and everything went black.
Chapter 27
Lee glanced at the seat, reserved for Mary, throughout his lecture. The seat was empty. Lee had seen Jim earlier that day and had assured him that he would escort Mary home after the lecture. Had she decided not to come? Had she fallen ill?
Typically he always closed a lecture with a question and answer period, but tonight he ended the lecture, turned the stage over to the head of the department, and immediately exited the hall.
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