Heroin Love

by Hunter, I. M.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Waking up from the rolling sound of a airplane flying above me. Confused I looked around for a second, seeing the sliding door shattered, a note attached to it. My hands covered in crusty dried blood, still griping my shattered phone. Getting up rubbing my dried eyes trying to acclimate them to the radiant yellow sun, I picked the note off the door.

  'Get your shit and leave before I come home. The door is unlocked.’

  I slowly rolled the door open, hearing the rollers echo through a noiseless house. I call out to make sure no one was around, I didn’t get a response. Creeping across the living room, I felt like a stranger in my own house, I made my way towards the office. Hesitating, I opened the door cautiously, the room appearing as if a mini tornado ran through it. The computer screen shattered on the floor in the corner, my desk drawers thrown across the room, papers riddled throughout the room. Megan discovered my floor safe, the face was smashed in, an obvious sign she was trying to gain access to it but with no success. The picture of her and I that rested on the desk was torn to pieces. Rummaging through the mess to find the spare phone I had in my desk. Finding it underneath a family canvas photo that was tossed on the floor with a big gash through it.

  Replacing the sim card in my spare phone from the damaged one, tossing what ever remained to the floor. Waiting for the phone to power on, I did a once over making sure there was nothing I needed in the office. Satisfied, I made my way over to our bedroom. The room resembled much of a cave, the curtains were drawn, the air frigid, I flipped on the lights revealing, much to my surprise, a perfect room. The black satin sheets neatly tucked with hospital corners, the pillows fluffed and aligned just right. I noticed something twinkling in the light on the nightstand. Her wedding ring, a 4 carat marquis diamond surrounded by pink diamonds laid in rose gold sat next to a note.

  ‘Maybe Rachael deserves this more than me.’

  Reaching into the drawer of the nightstand, trying to find a pen. Grabbing a black sharpie, I turned the paper over to leave Megan a note.

  ‘Only you deserve this. Please call me. Love you XoXo,’ my eyes starting to water again.

  The ominous sound of my phone ringing filled the air, it was Rachael.

  Kevin don’t answer it. Look at what she has done to you. Just ignore it, turn your phone off.

  I resisted long enough for the phone to stop ringing.

  Going into my closet, grabbing a few extra suits that were still in the plastic from the dry cleaners. Putting shoes, briefs, and socks in to my gym bag. The phone chimed ‘New Voicemail.’

  Don’t listen to it Kevin, you will get sucked back in. Just go to your office, just ignore her. You don’t need her, you need your family,’ fighting with myself inside my head. The devil won the battle once again.

  “You have one new voice message,” explained the robotic woman.

  “Baby, I’m so sorry about last night,” coughing through her words, “I am so sick, Pete never showed up. I need you, please come back. I love you, Kev.”

  Her voice pierced right through my heart, a sudden state of urgency compelled me to dart right over there to make sure she was okay. Smacking myself in the head a few times, trying to snap out of it, I resisted. I was going to go to work, I needed to work, get my mind off of everything. I went to the garage to grab me Corvette, don’t want that locked away, I loved that car. Jumping in the car, turning the key, the engine roared as it echoed in the garage.

  Maybe I should just sit in here, let the gas fill the air. I will drift away into a peaceful sleep and never wake up, contemplating an easy way out of this mess. The smell of the fumes started to flood into the cabin of the car, practically coughing my lung out of my chest, I quickly realized that is not what I wanted. Opening the garage, barely giving it enough time, I sped out of the driveway in great haste.

  Calmly entering the lobby of Onyx Environmental, my head down in defeat, my clothes in disarray, blood stains all over my shirt and pants, my hair frazzled. Carrying my suits in one hand and my gym bag in the other. Ann got up from her chair in shock, her mouth wide open.

  “Oh my, are you okay? What happened?”

  “Yeah, I’m fine. I am just going to clean up,” walking past her, trying not to make eye contact.

  “Let me know if you need anything sir,” she stated cautiously.

  Going into the bathroom in my office, washing the dried blood off my hands. Looking up in the mirror seeing the reflection of handsome hazel eyes surrounded by a pitiful disgusting man. The black bags around my eyes were more distinguishable, my face worn. I couldn’t even look at myself, regret festering itself inside of me. Looking back down into the sink, seeing the blood mixing with the water as it swirled down the drain. The cuts on my hands were distinct, seeing the fresh rubbery flesh in the wounds. I removed all my clothes, tossing them into the corner of the bathroom. Throwing water onto my hair trying to get it to a more presentable state.

  Removing one my suits from the plastic, a simple dark blue with pinstripes, white dress shirt, and a black tie. Putting it on myself with carelessness, hardly tucking in my shirt. Running my hands through my hair once more, trying to get it to slick back. I was ready to work.

  Slouching in my chair, twiddling a pen between my fingers, unable to focus.

  I wonder if Rachael is okay? What are you stupid? Who cares about her, she is killing you? I love her, I don’t know why, but I do. Why is Megan so upset? Maybe because you cheated on her. Yeah, but come on, like she never made a mistake? She is the one who is so distant from me. Your not really blaming this on her, are you?

  The thoughts stirring in my head, contradicting myself, blaming everyone else for my mistakes.

  “Sir, your wife is in the lobby,” Ann interrupted over the speaker.

  “What?! Bring her back,” checking myself in the reflection of my computer screen, throwing papers across my desk, acting busy.

  The door opens, Megan walking in cautiously, looking oddly optimistic and presentable. Getting up from my desk to go hug her.

  “Stay over there,” she quickly instructed.

  “Okay,” I replied hesitantly, “how are you?”

  “Cut the shit Kevin. You said you wanted to talk, so talk,” standing with her arms folded next to the door.

  “I screwed up. I felt alone, unappreciated, unloved. I stumbled into that place from odd circumstances, and I just fell in to it.” My eyes starting to tear up, “I don’t want to lose you. I love you. What can I do? I am so so so sorry, forgive me please.”

  She stood there non-responsive, not a step, not a gesture, nothing. Staring at me waiting for more.

  “Is that everything?”

  “I don’t know what else to say to you Megan, I really don’t.”

  “How about explaining why you would buy a house for a whore? Spend all this money on furniture? Risk our life, marriage, my love, my trust, and your business for a little piece of ass.” Still standing there calmly, she waited for a response.

  “I...I...don’t know. When I see her.... I just get put in a trance,” stuttering like a scolded child. “She just makes me feel young again...,”

  Interrupted my Ann, “Sir, I am sorry but can you pick up the phone.”

  I put a finger up to Megan, asking for one minute, I see her just roll her eyes.

  “What is it Ann?” I said sternly.

  “There is a women here asking for you. She looks lost.”

  “And who is it?” Hearing Ann ask for her name.

  “Rachael, she said you would know what she wanted.”

  Shit, is this really happening? I was staring at my wife giving me the evil eye, my girlfriend was in the lobby asking to see me.

  “Can you ask him to wait in the conference room? I will be there in one minute,” slamming the phone back into the receiver.

  “Megan, please wait here. It is really important.”

  “What the fuck Kevin! This is the bullshit I’m talking about. If you leave, I am leaving.�
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  Placing my hands together as I walk across the room towards her, “Please I beg you. I really need to talk to you. I just need to handle this one client. Please.”

  Reluctantly agreeing Megan plops down onto the leather sofa on the wall, “Hurry up.”

  Running down the hall towards the conference room, swinging the door open, “What the fuck are you doing here Rachael?”

  Standing there in a black leather double breasted trench coat, shiny black stilettos, with her hair in a long braid. “You never came home last night, I need you.”

  “Can we talk about this later? I have an important client in my office.”

  “I think he can wait a few minutes,” opening her trench coat revealing her nude body, walking over to me seductively.

  “Where is your necklace?”

  “That is what your worried about right now? Me standing in front of you naked, you worry about a necklace?”

  “I just happened to notice. Where is it?”

  “Well Pete never showed up. He got busted, and I needed a fix. I needed to buy a eighty.”

  “You sold that necklace for eighty dollars? Are you kidding me?”

  David was right, the drugs would always win.

  She just stared me, ashamed at herself.

  “Rachael, I really can’t right now. Please,” holding her at arms length away from me.

  “Ohhh, come on Kev,” pushing me down onto one of the chairs surrounding the conference table.

  Leaning into me, her knee in my groin, kissing my neck. I begin to melt, motionless as she continues to work on me. Her wet lips lightly pressing into me, I feel the coarseness of her tongue rubbing up and down on my neck, her knee oscillating, I feel myself getting erect. Reaching her hand down, I feel her unzip my pants. Grasping my dick firm, squeezing with all her might.

  Snapping out of my trance, I push her off of me, “I am serious, I can’t do this right now. Save it for later.” I gave her a kiss on her lips, leaving the room.

  “What the fuck Kevin!” Rachael screamed through the closing door.

  Standing in front of the office, looking down adjusting my clothes, I let out a big sigh and opened the door.

  “Oh good, your still here.”

  “Kevin, I really don’t want to lose you. The kids need you, I need you. Just come home please.”

  That was a total three sixty, I wonder what got into her. Maybe she finally realized that I wasn’t the only wrong one in this situation. Maybe she just wants me around so she can drive around in her fancy car, with her hair and nails done. Maybe she was just keeping me around for her better good...

  “Why do you really want me around?” I snarked

  Looking at me perplexed, “Are you kidding me? Don’t turn this around on me. So typical Kevin, you destroy something and try and blame everyone else around you. I want us to work through this, I want to be the one. I want us to be us again. But if your going to keep sneaking around I just won’t have it. And until you get your act together don’t come home.” Megan walked out of the room, not giving me a chance to respond.

  “I’m working on it,” I said under my breathe.

  My phone buzzed in my pocket.

  Rachael: Are u coming back? I am waiting

  She was still waiting in the conference room? Great!

  Hesitant, I walked back to the conference room, firm in my stance that we were going to just talk. Pushing the door open slowly, Rachael was covered up with a look of business on her face.

  “Ah Mr. Barrick, please have a seat.”

  Chuckling to myself, “Okay.”

  “Did you ever receive my picture?”

  “Yeah, I have been meaning to ask you about that. Was that real?”

  “Mhmm, sure was. What are your thoughts?”

  “Well I can tell you I was shocked. I didn’t really expect that.” Not wanting to insult her, “How could I say this gently? How do I know if it is mine? I mean you are a prostitute.”

  “Fuck you Kevin. Your a no good cheating husband, I can’t believe I even considered doing this with you.”

  “I didn’t mean it like that, but what if?”

  “It’s yours, I know it is,” her face still stern.

  “Okay, fine. I will accept that for now,” stopping my accusations for the time being.

  “So are we happy? Sad? Or what?”

  I wasn’t quite sure what to tell her, I really didn’t need this in my life. I wanted to tell her the truth about the situation but I couldn’t break her little heart, she was sitting there glowing in joy.

  “I think it’s wonderful,” putting on my best fake smile. “What do we do now?”

  Rachael shot out of her chair, slamming it back into the wall, and ran over towards me, jumping in my lap, knocking the wind out of me. Giving me a hug squeezing me hard, I could feel myself suffocating.

  “So what could we name it?”

  “Really,” I said in disbelief, “we don’t even know what it is yet.”

  “Oh stop it. What have you always wanted your kid’s name to be?”

  Pausing for a second, “I always wanted a Brittany or a Vinchenzo.”

  “Vinchenzo, what kind of name is that?” Her eyebrows curled in confusion.

  “It’s Italian, don’t worry about it. Now go home, I have work to do. I’m a very busy guy today.”

  “Yes sir,” she responded mocking me, “I will be home waiting.”

  “Don’t sell anymore of my shit,” I joked as she walked out of the conference room.

  I let out a huge sigh of relief, one bullet dodged, they didn’t run into each other. Megan still wants to be with me, kind of gave me a hall pass for a few days to work through my own problems. My chest starts to constrict as I think about Rachael, now I got another kid to worry about, she has me by the balls. I can’t just cut it off and throw her out like cheap laundry. I really didn’t want to leave her anyways.

  “Ann, can you get me a drink?” I dictated over the speaker, “I’m in the conference room.”

  “Right away sir.”

  I pull my phone out of my pocket, I really wanted more out of Megan, but she just abruptly left.

  Kevin: Hey, what can I do to make this better?

  Megan: Just be you. Leave your fling and come home, please. We can talk it over.

  I didn’t even want to respond, I didn’t know what to say to her. I wasn’t ready to just leave yet, how could I leave, she is pregnant. Ann comes in to deliver my drink, she turns around to leave without saying anything.

  “So Ann, can I ask you a question?”

  “Sure.”

  “If your friend was in a relationship with two people, one was a little destructive, and one was great except he was unappreciative, what would you tell him to do?”

  Hesitating for a second, as if she knew it was about me, “I would tell him to do whatever made him happier.” She left the room, not wanting to engage in the conversation anymore.

  Happy, what was happy? Is anyone really happy anyways.

  I was just content in the situation I was in. Happy when I got what I wanted, angry when what I wanted was lost or tried to leave. How could I get what I wanted, to be with Megan and Rachael, that would be the best situation out of everything. I could hire a nanny for Amber, it could be Rachael. They have never met, Megan would have a lot more free time, they both would be in the same house with me.

  Now that’s a stupid idea isn’t, or is it?

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Walking into our beach house, I called out for Rachael, I was looking forward to finishing up what we started back in the conference room. I didn’t hear any response, going to the usual place I found her, the bedroom, there she was. Standing in the doorway hearing very staggered breathing. A loud extensive intake of air followed by a long soundless pause. A sudden deflation of her body with a grunt as she exhaled. Watching her for a minute, it was a scary sight, she was out cold, each breathe sounding as if it was her last.

  Approa
ching the bed, a wall of a pungent acid smell filled the air, gagging in my throat I covered my nose with my shirt. My eyes tearing up, the air got thicker and thicker as I got closer to her. A pool of reddish brown vomit covered the bed, pieces of undigested food sprinkled throughout it. I turned her face over to look at it, smears of vomit across her face, over her eyelids, and across her nose. Her blonde hair, colored red from vomit, decorated by food. None of this seemed to phase her, she was sound asleep as if nothing was bothering her. Her forearms bruised, a black vein spidering down her arm. I felt bad for her, a beautiful young girl, helpless because of her addiction.

  Picking Rachael up off the bed, she laid lifeless in my body. Carrying her carefully into the bathroom, I placed her on the shower floor. Stripping her down, throwing her underwear into the wastebasket underneath the vanity. Turning the shower head to the side, checking the temperature with my hand. As it got to a comfortable temperature I turned it towards Rachael expecting a response. She sat there lifeless, her breath still staggered as water poured over her. I waited a few minutes, and nothing, she didn’t respond.

  Getting down on my knees, I poured some body wash into my hands, slowly rubbing it all over her. Scrubbing her down, getting the dried vomit off of her face. Freely moving her without resistance, her arms limp, head down, propped up against the wall. Shampooing her hair, using a brush to remove the pieces of chewed food from her tangled hair. The smell was finally starting to dissipate, and was replaced by the sweet tropical smell of her shampoo. Picking her soaked body off the floor, trying to wrap a towel over her as I balance her body against mine. Tying a towel around her head, I replaced her bra and underwear with fresh ones I grabbed out of the closet. Tossing an oversized t-shirt over her, sliding gym shorts on her waist. Carrying her over to the couch in the living room, placing her head on the armrest, laying a aqua blue polyester blanket over her to keep her warm.

  “We are going to get you help,” giving her a kiss on the forehead, “don’t worry.”