Vampire Charming

by Cassandra Gannon

  “Do you have amnesia or something?” Jane’s character on Dracula, Ph.D. had storyline about a forgotten husband, so Jane knew the symptoms. “Your last group of ‘respectful’ peasants overthrew you, remember?”

  “That was an aberration.” Slade insisted stubbornly.

  “An aberration? The whole Vampire Isle dumped your ass, even your grandmother the cat. You told me so yourself.”

  Slade’s expression darkened, even as multicolored lizard-people pirouetted passed. “You don’t need to remind me of my grandmother’s treachery. All my life, she was the one I trusted most. She was always in my corner. But, in the end, Grandma Dawn turned against me and helped banish me from my homeland. I don’t even know why.”

  Jane paused, considering Slade’s uncharacteristically bitter words. It occurred to her that his unflagging confidence hid a lot of hurt and doubts. How could it not? Everyone really had turned against this guy. Slade’s own family had sided with his cheating wife in the divorce. It had to be hard for him to swallow that kind of betrayal, especially when he seemed to be loyal to the point of stupidity.

  “Why did your grandmother…?”

  Slade cut her off. “I do not wish to discuss Grandma Dawn. None of that is relevant to this situation. The rebels wish me to fight. It is their custom. I understand that you have a soft heart and do not wish me to destroy…”

  “I do not have a soft heart.”

  Slade’s mouth twitched as though he found her indignant interruption adorable. “Yes, you do.” He said quietly. “It is why you are here.”

  Jane resisted the urge to slug Conan in his soft head. “I don’t. I’m a pragmatic, bitchy, cynical person. Everybody who’s ever met me knows that. And I’m being completely rational about this. You’re the one not thinking straight.”

  “Nonsense. I am being eminently rational. With the sun coming up, we do not have time to waste on protracted negotiations. Gaining power will be far easier if I kill a few rebels and prove I am the strongest.”

  She raised her voice so he could hear her over the music. How in the hell did they have electric guitar riffs in a world without electricity? “Do you want them to follow you because you’re strong or because you’re right?”

  “I am Slade, King of the Vampires. I’m always right.”

  The urge to hit him was almost irresistible now. “Would you just shut up and listen? Intimidation is a terrible way to run a kingdom. Fang seized control through killing. Is that who you are, too? Someone who scares people into obedience?”

  His head tilted, his expression going gentle. “I would never harm you.” He vowed, as if he thought that must be her concern. “I have no desire to force your compliance. That would gain me nothing. I want you to stay with me willingly.” One large palm came up to touch her hair and he gave a strange sigh as the curls slipped through his fingers. “I want you to want to be with me, Jane.”

  Jane should’ve batted his hand away. It was the sensible thing to do and she was a sensible girl. Instead, she shifted closer to him, her whole body tingling. It was always like that. The guy generated some kind of electricity that zinged through her whenever they touched. She knew it was a bad idea, but she couldn’t bring herself to break the contact.

  His thumb briefly brushed across her cheek. “I would do whatever you ask, if you’d only choose to remain at my side.” He whispered. “I want you to like me, Jane.”

  She did like him.

  Shit. Why the hell would she like such a lunatic? It was an even stupider idea than the rebels building a cage and wanting them to participate in the Seventy-Sixth Annual Hunger Games. No possible good could come from sticking with Slade and she was smart enough to know it. So why wasn’t she running for the hills?

  Maybe she was still drunk.

  “I’m not worried that you’ll hurt me. Not like that.” Jane shook her head, breaking the spell. “Look, I won’t help a king unless he’s fair to everyone in his kingdom. Even the unbilled peasants. These extras are the ones suffering and they should have some say in the story.”

  Slade stared down at her for a long beat and Jane felt her insides dip. As much as she should run away from the lunatic, she could seriously get used to the way he looked at her. Slade might be actively working to ruin her life, but he watched Jane like she was the only thing that could save his.

  The dance number ended with a dynamic flourish of random fireworks. Confetti drifted down from someplace. The music crescendoed and the rebels all stopping in “ta-da!” poses, like they were expecting thunderous applause.

  Jane and Slade ignored them.

  “You will help me?” He sorted through her statement and came up with the one part that interested him. “Really help me? With no more angrily sitting at bars or slipping away when my back is turned?”

  “I never tried to sneak away. I just threatened it. In fact, when you were in trouble, I came looking for you. I’ve been pretty damn helpful so far, buddy. I’m even wearing this ugly bracelet without complaint.” She held up the anti-Werewolf accessory, even though she kinda had been complaining about the damn thing.

  A lot.

  “But, you are not yet committed to our journey.” Slade clarified. “I feel like you are just looking for an opportunity to leave me.”

  Probably because she was. The Vampire did his best to hide it, but he wasn’t a total moron. “Tell me why I should stay, then.” Jane arched a brow. “Why should I follow you?”

  “Because you wish Allandrina to send you back to your gloomy world and I am going to marry the woman.”

  The reminder of Slade’s princesses didn’t improve her mood. “Not good enough. I’ve met you. I figure there’s only a fifty/fifty shot of this girl being dumb enough to say ‘I do.’ I don’t like that kind of risk.”

  “You seem to dislike all risks.”

  “Because, I’m not an idiot. And the smart money says I can hire a Witch easier than I can take over a kingdom. This is a fantasy movie and fantasy movies love Witches. There has to be some scantily-clad enchantress wandering around Bartertown.” She leaned closer him. “So, if you want me to spend even one more hour in a land without potato chips, Variety, and tampons, tell me why you’re worth taking a chance on. Why should the rebels and I vote Team Slade? Convince us. Convince me.”

  Slade angled his jaw at the challenge and turned back to the rebels. They didn’t seem to know what to do now that the music had stopped. Aside from more scattered calls of, “Eleven men enter. One man leaves,” the whole army was silently waiting for them to finish their argument. Why wouldn’t they? It wasn’t like they had storylines of their own to worry about. They were just the red shirts who died in the trenches, while the stars preened at center stage.

  “I will not fight in the Cage.” Slade declared, brushing passed the feathered guy. “Neither will any of you. Today, we begin anew.”

  That line sure as hell hadn’t been in the script. “What?” Chicken Man squawked. “Wait, you can’t…”

  Slade ignored that and stepped up on the wooden platform where the Middle Ages’ version of Twisted Sister waited for their next cue. The music died away and Slade stood there like he was spotlighted on Broadway. Dawn began to peek through the clouds, washing him in an otherworldly glow. No lighting tech could’ve created that effect. It was as if sun was shining down multicolored beams of magic just for Slade. If the dim rays burned him, he didn’t show it. Instead, he braced his legs apart and looked out at the rebels.

  “I am Slade, King of the Vampires.” He announced loudly. “And I know what it is to have my home stolen from me.”

  Just that quickly, he won the crowd.

  The rebels stopped chanting for the Cage and started listening like Slade was delivering the Gettysburg Address. Clearly, no one had ever bothered talking to them before. Their awe would’ve been annoying, except Jane sort of understood their reaction. It wasn’t so much Slade’s words as it was his presence. It was like he knew everything you’d been through and
now he was there to help solve all your problems. Two sentences into his speech and Slade was already the greatest public speaker she’d ever seen. Any political party would have sacrificed small children to have this guy on their ticket.

  “I know what it is to be cast aside.” He continued, his voice echoing through the woods. “To be hated. To be forced from your old life and thrown onto the mercy of fate.” He paused. “To be alone.”

  Jane couldn’t have looked away if her life depended on it.

  “All of us are the same here. We are all unwanted and forsaken.” He shook his head. “But, we are not beaten, or hiding, or prepared to give into our fears. All heroes must struggle. It is what makes them great. And, friends, we are the heroes of this tale. We are the ones who wish to make this world better. And we are just beginning our destinies.”

  People started nodding.

  Even a pragmatist like Jane could feel the electric pull of Slade’s optimism. It was like hope and shininess came together to create this one perfect savior of the downtrodden. Slade’s face reflected confidence, and strength, and so many ideas that you wanted to join his crusade without even knowing where he was headed.

  “The paths we intended to walk would not have led us to this point, it’s true. But I do not question the wisdom out the gods. This was where we were needed and this is where we must fight.” His gaze glowed with absolute sincerity. “You’ve heard the stories of Fang’s cruelty. People here are suffering and scared. If justice for all the citizens of Infinia matters to you,” he looked straight at Jane, “then you must help them. You must help me. It is who you are.”

  “You son of a bitch…” She whispered, seeing where this was headed.

  “If you think a king should be fair to peasants and lords alike, then you must do all in your power to overthrow the Werewolf. Would you turn your back on misery, because it is safer? Would you allow a monster to kill the innocent, because you fear the risk?” Slade arched a brow. “No. I think you are so much braver than that.”

  Jane stared at him and knew he’d just fucked up her whole life.

  “There is a deeper purpose at work, bringing us together.” Slade made an emphatic gesture with his hand. “I believe that. We are here, because our old lives were stifling all we are truly meant for. We were chosen to save this world. And we must do it together.”

  The rebels gave a brief cheer and Slade glanced at them in surprise. Maybe he’d forgotten they were there. The speech was aimed at Jane.

  “Together.” Slade repeated, more forcefully. “Together, we shall overthrow Fang. Together, we shall free Infinia. Together, we shall build new homes and a new kingdom for the people we love. You are not faceless extras in this story.” He looked right at Jane. “You are the story. This is our legend and we are writing it right now. Together.”

  Against her better judgment, she felt her lips curve.

  Slade’s eyes gleamed, seeing that she appreciated that line. “It will not be easy. Great quests never are. But, I ask that you join me in building a better future. The future we were meant to have. The future you deserve.” His gaze stayed locked on hers. “Stay with me and you will not be sorry. I swear it.”

  In that second, Jane saw the truth. She gazed up at the lunatic in front of her and knew that he really was a king. His destiny was huge and important. Slade was the star of this film. Not because he was good looking or charismatic, but because he believed that he could solve all of Infinia’s problems before the credits rolled. He was asking her to save this whole stupid world, because he believed they were the only ones who could do it.

  And he was right.

  Crap.

  Jane let out a long sigh. She wasn’t going home today.

  Chapter Six

  INT. OBSIDIAN FORTRESS- DAY

  Open with a tracking shot along a sinister corridor of the palace. The forbidding Obsidian Fortress looks like Castle Grayskull mixed with the Death Star. The rest of Infinia is terrified of the place and with good reason: Its owner is a mean, dangerous, (but super-hot) Werewolf. All sorts of creatures cower in the darkened corners, fearful of FANG’S wrath. Some of them are crying. Some are praying. There’s a close-up of a scared baby covering its eyes.

  Then we see FANG. He’s looking super-hot and majorly pissed. Ominous music plays, something with BIG sound and BIG drums and maybe some creepy chanting. (Note: We should definitely hire JOHN WILLIAMS to write an evil sounding score for this part.) FANG approaches a hidden door …and the scene fades to black, leaving the audience wondering what this super-hot villain is planning next.

  Redrafted Film Script- “From Here to Infinia”

  How the fuck could Slade still be alive?

  Fang had thought that bloodsucking bastard was long dead. Surely someone would have killed him, by now. Mostly likely Damien or one of Slade’s own idiot followers. The list of possibilities was endless, though. That Vampire was the most annoying, arrogant, meddlesome asshole ever born. There should have been a line around the block of supernatural beings waiting their turn to behead that douchebag. Instead, he was wandering free in Infinia, gathering more followers by the day.

  Fang slammed through the echoing hallways of the Obsidian Fortress, his cape billowing behind him. The entire palace was constructed of glassy black rocks. It loomed over the green lands of Infinia like a tombstone. Jagged and dark, it was designed to intimidate the weak followers of this weak land. It showed them who was boss.

  No one crossed the Werewolf King. Lately, even his own men were wise enough to stay out of Fang’s way. He’d already executed a dozen of them just for being nearby. When he was feeling testy, he needed an outlet for his frustrations and the Goblins were suitably breakable. But, after his justifiable burst of pique had left sixteen of them torn apart by wild dogs, he had his emotions back under control.

  All of this just went to show that if you wanted something done right, you had to do it yourself. Slade had ruined Fang’s last homeland, but he wasn’t going to get away with it, again. This time, Fang would see the Vampire dead and his stupid, blond head on a pike. Since no one else was up to the task of defeating that bastard, Fang would personally perform the honors.

  He looked forward to it.

  For nearly a week, he’d been scouring the Endless Woods for any sign of Slade and he’d come up empty, though. That ludicrously attired ass-hat had vanished. No matter how many underlings Fang sent into the woods, there was still no trace of the Vampire. In fact, there was very little trace of the underlings. The infinite stretch of trees swallowed everyone who left the path.

  But, Fang knew Slade was still out there. Plotting. Pontificating. Planning to steal his throne. If he was going to defeat the Vampire, it was clear that more drastic methods were needed.

  Fang checked to make sure he wasn’t being followed and then stepped into a stone alcove. Shoving aside a delightfully morbid tapestry featuring a wolf howling at a blood red moon, he opened a hidden door and headed down a concealed staircase. Torches lined the walls, casting eerie shadows on the mirrored surface of the walls, as he descended into the bowels of the palace.

  The Obsidian Fortress had been built on top of Infinia’s most sacred spot. Fang was a big believer in choosing a home based on location, location, location. For generations, the Light Fairies harnessed the energy in the caverns, but they’d fled, now. He had to make do with far less skilled assistance, so it was taking forever to discover the ancient spells. Werewolves weren’t known for their patience.

  “Did you find Slade, yet?” He demanded, slamming into the large chamber at the base of the stairs. It was the heart of the Fairies’ magicks. The walls were made of thick, semitransparent crystal. It glowed with an aurora borealis of power; brilliant colors shifting deep within the white stone. It was said that all possible futures could be foretold in the patterns, if you knew how to translate them.

  The Dark Fairy looked away from the changing colors. “I don’t know his location, but he still lives.”

>   Fang already knew that. Why was he paying this evil bitch to tell him things he already knew? Well, besides the fact that Fairies were the most beautiful of all supernatural beings.

  He glowered in annoyance, but his body was already responding to the sight of her. With waist length golden hair and deep brown eyes, she looked like most of her kind. Except, her angelic face held an underlying viciousness and her smile was all cruel edges. Dark Fairies and Werewolves often worked together, but this woman was particularly gifted at evil. He should probably try to remember her name, but it didn’t matter. Her job was to help him control Infinia and to provide a warm body.

  She gave him a knowing look, sensing his lust.

  “You’ve seen nothing else?” He snapped. “Nothing at all to help us defeat Slade?”

  She glided closer, covered in nothing but an ethereal blue robe. “Why do you worry so about this Vampire? You’ve killed so many of his kind, sire.”

  Fang shook his head, because she still didn’t understand. “He isn’t like the others. Slade is an overconfident, self-righteous idiot. But he inspires people. That makes him the most dangerous kind of enemy.”

  “How so?” She untied the fastening of her robe, letting it fall to the ground. The woman spent more time naked than clothed. The ancient power in the cavern aroused everyone who entered the space and she seemed to thrive on the mindless lust. In the corners of the room, Cave Elves stirred. They were her sexual playthings and they scurried closer at the promise of a new game.

  Fang let out a hissing breath as one of them dropped to its knees before her. Its wide mouth found the junction of her thighs and began lapping at her juices. Her head went back with an erotic moan, but her eyes stayed on Fang. She liked to tease.

  Fang was so turned on by the sight that he didn’t even protest when another Elf crouched before him. Spindly hands unfastened his belt and began massaging his erection. Ordinarily, he wouldn’t allow such a low creature to touch him. Elves were just mindless servants, after all. But, this room amplified sexual urgency and drove him towards release.