Crossing the Line

by Meghan Rogers

  I didn’t answer, but I stopped moving. He came toward me, slowly, until he was right behind me. He peeled the towel off my shoulder. The threads got stuck in the blood and pulled at the wound. I hissed but he didn’t apologize.

  “Sit down,” he said, before turning to get the bag by the door.

  “Why?” I shifted away. “What are you going to do?”

  He put his bag at my feet. “Like I said, you need stitches.” I opened my mouth to argue, but he shook his head. “I’m not asking.” His voice was stern. “Sit down.” He stared at me until I caved and lowered myself onto the couch I’d been standing in front of.

  He sat down behind me and started riffling through the bag. He came up with sutures and pills. “Here.” He held out the pills. “Take these. I don’t have anything else to numb the area.”

  I shook my head. I had been successfully fighting off the craving, and I wasn’t about to jeopardize that. “I’ll be fine. Just stitch me up.”

  He rolled his eyes. “You don’t have to prove anything to me.”

  I shook my head. “I don’t need them. Just do it.”

  “I’m not threading a needle through you without a painkiller.” I could hear the irritation building in his voice. “You’re not going to gain anything by suffering.”

  “I said I don’t need it!” I was sharp and insistent. The more he pushed, the harder it was to hold back.

  “Jesus Christ!” he said. “Why does everything have to be so difficult with you? You don’t need to be a hero.”

  I spun around. “I’m a fucking drug addict, okay?” His face dropped. I’d stunned him. “Get. Them. Away from me.”

  He studied my face, and I knew he was trying to see if I was playing him. “You’re serious.”

  Now I was the one getting angry. “Yes.”

  He dropped his head to put the pills back in the bag, and when he straightened up, he wouldn’t look me in the eye. “I’ll stitch it up cold. As long as you can handle it.”

  I turned back around so he could get to work. “Don’t worry, Scorpion. I’ll be fine.”

  He pulled my ponytail out of the way, his fingers brushing against my burn scar. I bit my lip as the needle broke my skin, trying to avoid associating it too closely with an injection. I exhaled evenly to keep myself steady.

  “I’m sorry.” He wasn’t talking about the stitches.

  “I didn’t choose to be like this,” I said.

  “You don’t need to tell me.”

  “I do.” I wanted to. I was trying to be a partner. He paused and I could see him glance up at me out the corner of my eye. I closed my eyes for a moment, preparing myself. “KATO engineered this drug called Gerex. According to Dr. March it’s one of the most painfully addictive drugs she’s ever seen. The first time they shot me up I was ten. I was addicted after one hit.”

  “That’s how they kept you in line, wasn’t it?” Scorpion asked.

  “Yeah,” I said, grimacing as he threaded another stitch through my skin. “I could only get the drug from them. Anything I bought on the street would take the edge off, but it wouldn’t get the job done.”

  “They put you in a position to need them.” The poison in his voice surprised me.

  “They used it for everything. Every time we sparred each other in training, we were fighting for Gerex. Every time we didn’t complete a mission to their liking, they would keep it from us.” I swallowed. “Going without it—” I shook my head. “I don’t know what they put in it, but going without it is painful. It’s like your insides are on fire and it’s all you can do to keep from burning from the inside out. Every muscle aches, and every nerve screams. It goes away, eventually, but until it does—”

  Scorpion stopped stitching right as a shiver shot through me. He put a hand on my back to steady me. “You’re all done,” he said, rubbing some antibiotic cream on the sutures and covering them with a bandage. I twisted so I could sink back into the couch. “How did you finally get off it?”

  I closed my eyes briefly. Now that I was talking, answering his questions seemed easier. “Dr. March.”

  Realization dawned on Scorpion’s face. “That’s why you were here a month before anyone knew about you.”

  I nodded. “If living in KATO for ten years was hell, the month of detox was just as bad. The drug was so powerful and so specifically designed, March was afraid to give me anything to help with the process.”

  His face got even more serious. “So, you’re telling me you had a cold detox from a drug more powerful than heroin.”

  I nodded.

  “Jesus.”

  My arms twitched and I pulled them across my chest to control it before it spread to the rest of my body. I exhaled slowly and looked back to Scorpion. He was inspecting me and I saw the question in his eyes. “I get cravings sometimes. When I’m stressed or when certain—events trigger the familiarity. I’m getting better with it.”

  “Which is this?” he asked.

  I bit my lip, trying to keep myself under control, and told him what things were like at the end of the mission. I looked him in the eye. “If this had been a KATO mission, I’d be extracted and high by now.”

  Scorpion kept his expression even, but his control seemed forced. “So you’re basically programmed to want it now that the job is done?”

  I nodded and looked at the table in front of us. I couldn’t handle his reaction.

  “You worked for one of the most careless agencies in the world. And you killed for them so easily. I never thought it was because you didn’t have a choice.” He laughed a little and shook his head disbelievingly. “You were fighting for your life, every time. I never stood a chance.”

  I pulled a smirk across my lips. “You never would have stood a chance anyway.”

  He didn’t smile, and his expression had evolved to one of disbelief. “No one should be controlled liked that.” He shook his head. “This life—it’s bad enough when I have to kill someone, but it’s part of the job, and I chose to do it. You never had a choice.”

  I shrugged. “It doesn’t matter.” I shifted uncomfortably, suddenly regretting everything I’d said.

  “Yes.” He was deadly serious. “It does. No one should have been forced into that, let alone at the age you were when you started.” His jaw locked. “The things you did—”

  “That’s why it was so important to stop that sale today,” I said. “They couldn’t get those weapons. The damage KATO would do—”

  “Well, we made sure they didn’t.” He tilted his head to the side. “Though we’re definitely going to have to talk about a new approach.”

  I smiled lightly. It felt so strange to be talking with him like this. Something about the moment reminded me of a conversation I’d had with Nikki. I glanced up at Scorpion. “Do I scare you?”

  He looked surprised by the question. “What makes you think that?”

  “I just a thought I might.” I watched him, waiting, but he struggled to find the words. “Because you scare me.”

  He was ready to say something, but before he could a sharp chirp interrupted us. The phone in the pack was ringing. He held my gaze for another moment, then leaned back to get the phone. I pulled my arms to my chest and gripped my biceps. The call took only a few seconds.

  “We need to move,” he said when he hung up. “There’s a field half a block away. Our extraction chopper is picking us up in ten minutes. They’re taking us to an air force base to get a plane home.”

  We both stood up, and I followed him out the door, leaving the conversation behind. We had to run between buildings to get to the field, which put me back in mission mode. We waited on the edge of the field, not speaking. We were there a minute before we heard the chopper. We jogged toward it before it landed. I jumped through the open door, with Scorpion following. We were back in the air in under thirty seconds.
<
br />   When we were safely on board, I made a beeline to the back corner. I did the same thing when we transferred to the plane. I needed to be alone if I had any hope of keeping it together until I got to Dr. March.

  No one bothered me.

  Chapter Eighteen

  DYNAMICS

  I found my way to the medical wing when we got back. I must have fallen asleep after my treatment because the next thing I knew I was opening my eyes. I relaxed on my back and tried not to think of how stupid I had been. I shouldn’t have told Scorpion as much as I did. I shouldn’t have trusted him. I got caught up in the mission—in the idea of a partnership.

  The door to my room opened before I could dwell on things for too long. “You’re up,” Dr. March said. “How are you feeling?”

  “Good.” I sat up. “Better.”

  She smiled as she put on a pair of gloves. “Glad to hear it. I need to check your stitches.”

  I rubbed the wound on my neck, which was throbbing. I leaned forward so she could get a good look, wincing as she peeled back the bandage. “Elton did a good job with this.” She sounded impressed. “There shouldn’t be too much of a scar.”

  “That’s good,” I said.

  “How did it happen?” she asked, applying antiseptic cream and replacing the bandage.

  “I was too slow,” I said, shaking my head frustrated. “I’ve been working to get my speed back, but I just—can’t.”

  Dr. March squeezed my shoulder. “You’re not that far removed from the drug. What you’re going through isn’t easy. It will take some time.”

  I nodded, still feeling unsure.

  “You’re free to go whenever you’re comfortable,” she said.

  “I don’t have to stay the night?” I tried not to sound too excited.

  “Not this time,” she said with a smile. “You’re stable enough that I’m okay with letting you leave—unless you’re not.”

  “No,” I said, popping off the bed. “I’m good.”

  “Okay, then. You can head out when you’re ready. Director Simmonds needs to debrief you and I’ll need to see you in about five days to get the stitches out.”

  • • •

  Simmonds was waiting for me when I got to his office. From what I could gather, being debriefed by the head of the agency wasn’t something that happened often. I didn’t know if it was because of the way I’d acted or because of who I was, but I wasn’t complaining. I’d rather talk to him than anyone else.

  I was happy with the overall outcome of the mission, but we needed to see what KATO wanted with those weapons. The only thing we had to go on at the moment was the flashdrive from China. I asked Simmonds about the other encrypted files. He said the tech team felt they were close to breaking through the weaker decryption, and handed me a pager, promising to let me know when it came down. He also gave me the details of my cover mission to pass on to KATO.

  I stepped out of the office when I was done and found Scorpion leaning against the wall across from the door. I hesitated, both because he’d surprised me and because I was a little unsure of what to expect from him.

  “Hey,” he said, studying me cautiously.

  “Hi, Scorpion,” I said, trying not to shy away.

  “How did your debrief go?”

  “It was fine.” I started walking down the hall and he fell into step next to me.

  He glanced at me out of the corner of his eye. “And how is—everything else?”

  I turned away. “It’s good.” I felt a weight on my chest. I didn’t want to talk to him. Not now.

  He tugged my arm and forced me to stop. I looked him in the eye for the first time that day, but only for a second. I felt my face flush and dropped my gaze to the floor.

  “What is with you?” he asked.

  “Nothing.” When he didn’t say anything I looked back up. He was staring down at me, his eyes wide with disbelief. I sighed and then I started talking fast. “I shouldn’t have told you what I did, and I shouldn’t have let my guard down. I didn’t mean to say that much.” I looked back to the ground. “No one should see me like that.”

  Silence followed until Scorpion found his voice. “Oh my God.” He sounded astonished. “You’re embarrassed.”

  “What?” My neck snapped up, straining my stitches. “No I’m not!”

  “Yes.” He was so sure. “You are.”

  My face burned hotter and I stepped around him.

  “Hey, now.” He grabbed my wrist before I could get too far away and pulled me back in front of him. “Jocelyn, look at me.”

  I tilted my head up and glared. “I’m not embarrassed.”

  A small smile spread across his lips. “All right, fine,” he said. “You’re clearly not embarrassed. I don’t know what I was thinking.” When I didn’t laugh he got serious. “You asked me something before the extraction.”

  I shook my head. I didn’t want to hear this. “Don’t,” I said. “It’s fine.”

  “You did scare me,” he said. I froze, not knowing how to respond. “But you don’t anymore. And you shouldn’t be afraid of me either.”

  I rocked on my feet uncertainly, and Scorpion watched me, waiting. “I know I’m unpredictable,” I said.

  He snorted. “That’s an understatement.”

  I glared at him, but kept talking. “You should know I would never go back to KATO. I have too much at stake.”

  His smile faded and his expression went stern. “I believe you.”

  My eyes locked on him. “Are you serious?”

  He tilted his head, as if he could barely believe the words that were about to come out of his mouth. “Jocelyn, after this mission, I’m going to believe you until give me a reason not to.”

  I stared at him, shocked. “I don’t entirely know what to do with that.”

  A full smile broke out on his face. “Just sit with it. Take a few days to get used to the idea.” He rubbed his chin. “And something else you can think about—when we’re off comms, partners don’t usually call each other by their code names.”

  I blinked, taken aback. “Yeah,” I said. “I’ll work on that.”

  • • •

  I waited until the last possible minute to get to Global Dynamics. Interrupting KATO’s plans had given me a renewed focus, and I was more determined than ever to keep my cool with Agent Harper. Limiting my exposure played a big role in that.

  I breezed into the room just ahead of Sam. I tried to get to my seat without an incident, but Harper had other ideas.

  “Well,” he said, stopping the two of us. “It’s nice of our problem children to show up.”

  I bit my tongue, which was not what Agent Harper wanted.

  “Kill anyone lately, Viper?” he asked. He refused to let my old name go.

  My temper flared. I couldn’t take it anymore. I took a step forward to fight him, but Sam kicked me. I whirled around to face him.

  Sam shook his head. “Keep walking, Steely.”

  My jaw locked, and when I didn’t move, he turned me around himself. He kept his hands on my shoulders, guiding me back to my seat. “I have a plan,” he whispered.

  I arched an eyebrow, but eased into my chair, keeping my mouth shut.

  Agent Harper looked from me to Sam. “Is there something you want to share with the rest of us?”

  Sam shook his head. “Nope. I’m good.”

  Harper looked suspicious. Sam was never one to hold back. It was enough to make the whole class curious. Agent Harper turned back to his computer and pulled up his presentation for the day. Sam smirked. From the look of things, Harper was playing right into his hands.

  The presentation was on the recent history of Russian espionage. Sam took out his phone. He held his pen in one hand, pretending to take notes, while he typed on his phone with the other. I kept my eyes on his screen next t
o me, watching as computer code ran itself across the phone. The screen changed and a small compact version of Agent Harper’s computer screen appeared in Sam’s hand.

  I glanced up at him, and he smiled mischievously. He then opened a version of the presentation, flipped to the second page, erased the content, and dropped a video file into the slide. He made a few more tweaks to the presentation, then saved it. Once he was done, he went back to Agent Harper’s computer screen and reopened the file so the changes were included. The screen in front of the room blinked. If anyone noticed the change, they pretended not to.

  Sam kept Harper’s screen in the palm of his hand, while I held my breath and waited. Then, when Agent Harper finally flipped the slide, I had to force my face to stay neutral. A giant black video square filled the screen with a triangle play icon in the middle. Most people in the room kept it together, but a few whispers made Agent Harper look back at the screen. “What the—”

  Sam pressed the play button before he could finish his sentence.

  It was a fight. Actually, it was a series of fights between Harper and Cody, and Harper and Travis. As strange as it was to call Travis by his first name, it was even stranger to see him so young. All of the fights seemed to be filmed on phones and Agent Harper lost every single time.

  Real-life Harper’s eyes widened when he realized what was playing. He started hitting keys, frantically doing anything he could to get the video off the screen. But whatever Sam had done, he’d made sure we would be watching the entire show.

  Each time, Agent Harper hit the mat hard. The fights were pretty embarrassing on their own, but together it was downright humiliating—especially coming from someone with as much pride as Agent Harper seemed to have. The worst of them all was the last one. Harper eyed Travis up and down, exuding confidence to the point of cockiness. From what I could tell, they were both still students. They were in the training room, and the entire facility had come to a stop to watch them go at it.

  Travis’s eyes were narrowed and his face was set. He moved slowly to the center of the mat, ready for a fight. Agent Harper met him there with a smirk.