Catch All The Girlfriends!
Page 27
“Mishal, Sultry Dance.”
“Crystal, Boulder Smash!”
Being five levels higher, the Mishal went first. Her hips swayed and twitched, taking on a mind of their own. She had a matching veil draped over her hips that barely covered her exposed legs. Just as Yoshi had become sucked in by her performance, she threw her wavy brown-red hair back in exultance, fire shooting three feet high out of her mouth.
Mishal’s SPCL. ATTACK sharply rose!
Not cowed by the performance, Crystal closed the distance between the two of them and with the last of her energy, drove a fist into the Mishal’s flat belly. The enemy’s HP dropped 15%.
It’s Super Effective!!!
Clive let a tiny smile of triumph slip. “Mishal, Vulcan Kiss.”
The Mishal leaped back once, then once more. Her fingertips were on her lips, a smile curving into view. She leaned forward, dropped the hands and a flamethrower erupted from her mouth. Crystal managed to avert her face from the attack but took the full force of it.
It’s not very effective…
Crystal fainted!
The last embers licked themselves to oblivion in the air, leaving a blackened and burned Crystal behind.
“Crystal, good work! Flick, go!” When Clive saw the Felicity standing before his Mishal, he couldn’t help ‘tsk’ from the other side of the battlefield.
“Mishal, Vulcan Kiss.”
It’s not very effective…
Flames once again consumed Yoshi’s girlfriend. After they disappeared, Flick dropped her arms, steam rising from her body.
“Flick, you know what to do,” Yoshi said with a grin.
Flick's Water Slap made Mishal’s HP drop to 20%.
It’s Super Effective!!!
Flick’s HP dropped to 34/80 from the fire attack. She cleaned up her opponent in the next turn and her HP didn’t drop any more.
Enemy Mishal fainted!
Yoshi’s heart was in his throat. Two… effectively one girlfriend left. Clive was staring at his fist, chewing his gum absent-mindedly. Did he still have a couple more girlfriends to go? If he was taking this long to send out his next girlfriend, it was possible they were both weak against water-types. Or was it because he only had one girlfriend left and he was trying to delay the inevitable? He thrust his fist out, revealing the remaining ring on his finger.
“Go Crystal.”
Yoshi couldn’t help it; he jumped and punched the air. The battle was far from over; the Crystal could have been level 50. But the moment he announced the rock-type, he just had to celebrate.
When he saw that she was level 15, not 50, he turned away. Slooooow, deeeeep breaths.
“Flick, Water Slap.”
“Crystal, Boulder Punch.”
The two girlfriends ran at each other. Felicity leaped, water droplets shimmering around her open palm. Clive’s Crystal loaded a right uppercut.
It’s Super Effective!!!
The enemy Crystal crashed into the ground while Flick landed on her feet before overbalancing. They stared daggers at each other, breathing heavily while their respective HP bars responded to each other’s attacks.
22/80. Yoshi flicked his attention to the rock-type. She was down to 45%.
“Flick, Water Slap!”
“Crystal, Boulder Punch.”
Flick got to her feet first. She stumbled and almost fell over in her hurry to deal another punishing slap. “Rrrrrraaaaaargh!”
It’s Super Effective!!!
Skin being slapped had never sounded so good. The enemy Crystal flew limply through the air, thudding heavily on her back several yards away before rolling to a standstill.
Enemy Crystal fainted!
You have defeated Team Boom Grunt Clive!
Felicity gained 845 EXP!
Starlotte is now Level 19!
Felicity gained 845 EXP!
Felicity is now Level 22!
You have received 772 Coins for winning!
Yoshi exhaled the breath he had been holding. Still no attacking move… no matter. The battle was over and he was victorious.
Yoshi took his hat off and ran a hair through his dirty hair and looked at it. Body grease, grime, dirt and other bodily fluids intermingled among his fingers. First thing he was going to do in Sapphire was have a shower. Preferably with his girlfriends. Wonder if Mr. Pampers had a facility for that?
The boom gate rose and Clive stepped out from the check point. “You’re free to go,” he droned.
Yoshi put his hat back on, doffed it at the Team Boom member and walked through. The exit was there, right there, less than 100 yards away. He broke off into a run, laughing like a demented maniac.
Beep, beep!
“Oh shit, sorry!” The transport vehicle drove past, carrying another load of Nomite. As terrible as it was, he was too tired to care right now. The vehicle disappeared into the tunnel, beeping again and turning on its headlights, illuminating someone else who had stepped out of the way.
“Ivan?” Yes, that was his lab coat fluttering in the breeze. “Ivan!”
The figure turned towards him just as Yoshi started running again. Sure enough, it was him and not his eyes playing tricks on him. He stopped in front of him, hands on his knees.
“Oh man, am I glad to see you. You disappeared before!” Ivan seemed to have reverted to his quiet, introspective mode again. “I don’t blame you, that threesome with Suzy and Ziva was pretty crazy.” Yoshi straightened up to look at his friend. Tozuck was standing side on to him, looking outside the cave, as if expecting someone.
“I don’t know how Team Boom let you get through unscathed, I barely made it through just then. But whatever. We’ll talk about it when we get to Sapphire.”
Ivan turned back to him, his eyes gleaming. “We won’t be going to Sapphire.”
Yoshi frowned. “What do you mean? That’s why you were here right? To wait for me to catch up so we could go in together?”
Ivan shook his head. “You’re right about me waiting here for you, but it’s just to make sure that you don’t leave this place.”
37
The Final Boss
“What the hell are you on about?” Yoshi murmured. “What’s Team Boom done to you?”
Ivan chuckled. “They’ve given me money, power and influence. The ability to actually make an impact in this Frank-forsaken place.” He took off his lab coat and flung it to the side. “Get back, we’re going to battle.”
Ivan Tozuck wants to battle!
“You can’t battle, all your girlfriends have fainted.”
“Team Boom revived them all for me.”
“What? Why?”
“Look, don’t get me wrong. I do love the work with Poke, I really do. I want to make a difference. Why else would I voluntarily get stuck in this hellhole?” He took a step towards Yoshi, his six rings glinting on his belt. “But I’d be lying if I said that I didn’t want fame, fortune, the ability to fuck all 150 girlfriends in Ohno, my name on the Merah League Hall of Fame… I want it all!”
“You’re crazy.” Yoshi glanced over Ivan’s shoulder. What’s the chance I’d be able to make a run for it now?
“Oh come on. You can’t tell me that as a trainer, you haven’t thought about lifting the Harem League trophy, your battles played on repeat, from every angle, in super slo-mo for millions of viewers? Signing autographs? Cashing royalty checks from all the sponsorship deals?”
Yoshi said nothing.
“That’s what I want. I’m just not settling on taking the same path that every other trainer is. I’m not scared to get help from those more powerful than me.”
“It’s not too late, Ivan. Let’s just go into Sapphire, talk to the police and let them handle Team Boom.”
Ivan’s laugh was dark and murky. “Team Boom is above the police. Why do you think they have been allowed to continue mining the Grand Stone for this long?” He raised a finger and slowly pointed it at Yoshi. “I haven’t known you long, but I consider you my friend. I
f being the strongest trainer in Ohno means anything to you, you will join me.”
Yoshi mulled it over. “Do I have to wear the ugly-ass jumpsuit?”
Ivan sighed. “Most likely.”
“Then I guess we’re battling.” Yoshi turned and walked back towards the boom gates. With six level 15 girlfriends at full health, the chances of him winning were slim. Think, Yoshi, think! “You know,” he said turning back to Ivan. “There really isn’t much point in us fighting. I’ll probably lose, you get your winnings, then I’ll bounce on over to Sapphire anyway.”
Ivan shook his head. “That’s not happening. Mr. Sanchez has plans for you and they don’t include leaving the Caverns.”
Frank’s balls! What the hell does he want from me?
“Anyway, enough talk.” He shifted his stance and rested his hand on his hip. “You had a Starlotte, a Felicity, a Sophie, a Suzy and… a Crystal?” He nodded to himself. “Yes, that sounds about right. Though those checkpoint guards would have roughed you up a bit. Wonder which of your girlfriends are done?”
Yoshi kept still, determined not to let his body language betray him.
“Well we definitely know one thing: Starlotte’s useless. You’ve done well to come this far with a girlfriend who can’t defend you, but it all ends tonight.”
Yoshi stared at him, nails digging into his hand.
“Go Labby!”
It was weird seeing the dark wolf in denim shorts and a red and black checked, button-up shirt. The uniformed Labby #10 seemed a world away. Ivan’s one carried itself with the same proud ferocity: straight back, arms crossed, silently staring down the opposing trainer.
“Go Flick!” The water-type appeared, wearing cuts and bruises all over her body. She had changed to a fresh, white tank top and pink swimming short shorts, showing off her powerful, smooth legs.
She took one look at the opposing trainer and spun around to Yoshi. “What’s going on?”
“I’ll explain later,” Yoshi said in low tones. “Stay focused.” Flick nodded and turned back to her opponent.
“Labby, Black Jaws!” The dark-type fell onto all fours, loping faster and faster towards the opposing girlfriend.
The odds were stacked heavily against Flick. Attack Ivan’s girlfriends head on and her losing would be a question of when, not if. If only there was a way to stop his girlfriends from attacking…
That’s it!
“Flick, use Flash!”
Even though she was facing away from Yoshi, he still had to turn away when she lifted up her top. The Labby yelped, lost her footing and slid on the floor. With her furred hands over her eyes, she snarled and bit at the air, missing Flick by a couple feet.
Black Jaws missed!
“Flick, Water Slap!”
Felicity prowled around the dark-type, keeping her at least an arm’s length away. Flash was only meant to decrease accuracy by 50%. It seemed to really discombobulate the Labby, possibly due to the fact that she was a dark-type. She held her head up still, her ears turning like furred satellites as she tried to triangulate Flick’s constantly changing position. Ivan’s yelling wasn’t helping.
“She’s over there! Turn around! Yes, there! Dash Tackle!”
For a moving target, this was possibly the most ineffective sort of attack. It was no surprise when Labby powered headfirst into the wall.
Dash Tackle missed!
“Flick, Water Slap!”
Taking advantage of her foe’s further confusion, Felicity stealthily made her way to the jarred dark wolf, drenching her canine face with one slap on each cheek.
Critical Hit!
The combined damage from the first and second attacks brought the Labby’s HP down to 15%.
“Fuck’s sake…” Ivan rubbed his temples, other hand on his hips. “Labby, get back.”
The dark wolf returned to her ring, still somewhat dazed.
“OK, no more dicking around. Patricia, go!”
Yoshi’s heart plopped into his stomach. He’d completely forgotten that Ivan had the electric-type on him.
She zapped out, flipping back her pixie cut and tugging on her bomber jacket.
“Ughhh…” Flick groaned.
“Hee hee, this should be fun,” Patricia said gleefully, skipping on the spot.
Ivan cocked his head, a knowing smile dawning on his face. “It should indeed. Patricia, Shock Lock!”
“Flick, Flash!”
Once again, Flick unleashed the innate power that came with her mutation. Yoshi turned away but found that he wasn’t forced to close his eyes. Patricia however, had been temporarily blinded. Yoshi took this opportunity to bring up Flick’s full stats:
NAME: Felicity (Flick)
LEVEL: 22
NATURE: Playful
TYPE: Water
ACC.: Iridescentia
HP: 39/83
- ATTACK: 24
- DEFENSE: 20
- SPCL ATTACK: 24 (+2)
- SPCL DEFENSE: 18
- SPEED: 20
MOVESET:
Water Slap - Type: Water - 4/35 PP (Deals a wet, punishing slap that has 20% chance of causing confusion)
Flash - Type: Normal - 8/40 PP (Produce blinding light that drops accuracy by 50%)
Water Barrier - Type: Water - 10/15 PP (produces a water barrier that sharply increases DEFENSE and SPCL DEFENSE. Lasts 2 turns.)
Shit, Flash was down to only 8 PP. Pretty soon, she wouldn’t be able to Water Slap either.
It’s Super Effective!!!
“No!” Yoshi yelled. Electricity crackled and rippled at Flick’s left shoulder. The shock was so powerful that she hung suspended in the air for a second before collapsing to the ground. Her HP trickled down to 20/83.
Damn it, damn it, damn it. He was running out of options, but what could he do?
“Flick, use Flash!”
Felicity wearily got to her feet, lifted her shirt and let out another bright – but not blinding – flash of light.
Patricia’s accuracy fell!
If she could just blind her enough, maybe all of Patricia’s attacks would miss… then maybe… just maybe… he could finish her off… that left a rock-type, a ground-type, which Flick had the type advantage against… but she only had 4 PP of Water Slap left…
“Patricia, use Shock Lock!”
Having taken the full force of a second Flash, the Patricia was now far worse off. If the Labby seemed to struggle earlier, the Patricia was virtually disabled. She blinked and stumbled around, heard a sound (which was actually Yoshi running around the battle ring to confuse her) and started running towards it. Picking a random point, she swung a fist crackling with electricity, lost her balance and fell down.
Shock Lock missed!
Ignoring the ranting and seething Ivan, Yoshi focused on the battle.
“Flick, Water Slap!”
The Patricia stumbled to her feet and turned just as Felicity creamed her across the face. Her HP dropped 30%.
Unfortunately, the attack seemed to have brought clarity and focus back to her. The Patricia slapped her own face a few times, keeping her eyes trained on the water-type.
“Patricia, Shock Lock!” Ivan boomed.
She shook her hands out, tiny bolts of lightning skipping across her skin. Flick was side-stepping around the battle ring, beleaguered but not giving in. In a fraction of a second, the Patricia leaped into the air and threw a superman punch. Flick ducked, but the Patricia’s fist homed into the top of Felicity’s head.
It’s Super Effective!!!
Felicity is Paralyzed!
The water-type was flat on her stomach, hands out in front. Blood trickled out from underneath her face. Broken nose, probably. She hadn’t fainted yet, but her HP was down to 2/83.
“If you’re putting her through this, you’re either stupider than you look or you have no other usable girlfriends.”
Yoshi couldn’t tear his eyes away from Felicity. It’s happening… I’m going to lose this battle.
�
��Patricia, finish her off.”
The electric-type straddled Flick. On her knees, she dug her fingers into Flick’s pink locks, wrenching her head up. Blood was streaming down her nose, trickling into her mouth and dripping off her chin.
Patricia used Shock Lock!
It’s Super Effective!!!
Felicity fainted!
Patricia dropped her opponent's head and it thudded back onto the floor.
Yoshi withdrew his fainted water-type and held it close to his mouth. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, replacing the ring.
“So, is that it? No…? No! Don’t tell me!” Ivan scoffed incredulously, watching Yoshi take his final ring out. “You really did leave little Starry to the end.”
“Go Starry,” Yoshi said listlessly.
Just like Flick, she was confused when she saw Ivan standing at the other side of the battle ring. Yoshi greeted her questioning gaze with as much courage he could muster.
“You know, technically, Starry’s my girlfriend. If it wasn’t for Poke, she would be sitting in my GGN account.” He regarded her with pity. “But that old has-been was getting suspicious. I needed to throw him off the trail. She was perfect.” Starry stayed perfectly still, not taking her eyes off the man who caught her. She was clutching the Grand Stone shard in her left hand. “The fact that I’m facing her again today… it must be fate. I was meant to purge her that day, along with her sisters.”
The last vestige of trust Yoshi held for this man crumbled. “You’re scum,” he murmured.
“And you’re about to lose,” Tozuck responded smugly. “Patricia, Shock Lock!”
“Starry, Gaze!”
Starlotte focused her soft eyes on the electric-type.
Patricia’s Defense fell!
The electric-type blinked the temporary effects away, pulled her fist back and drove it into Starlotte’s stomach.
Like a discarded doll, she flew through the air, landing on her buttocks, electricity crackling across her body and dry-retching. Her HP was down to 38/51.