by MJ Carnal
She whimpered as her pace faltered. She shifted her body forward onto his; changing the position just enough that she saw stars. Her nails dug into his hair and her legs tightened around him.
“That’s it baby. Let it go. Come with me, Lil. Now.” He pressed his mouth against her chest to muffle his moan.
She felt the heat from his body as his cock exploded in pleasure. That was all it took. She came harder than she ever had in her life. She struggled to catch her breath. He circled his thumbs against her thighs keeping her body on high alert.
“Shit, that was the best birthday present I’ve ever gotten.” Steve laughed as he wiped the sweat off his forehead. “That was seriously hot.”
“I didn’t know you had that dirty talk in you.” She giggled. “That felt so good. Can you imagine that without clothes?”
“I do almost every night.” Her expression made him wink. “Come on, I need to clean up and I need you to walk in front of me.”
After getting himself put back together, he walked back out to join his friends. They all toasted him when he walked back over, high fiving him and talking shit. He felt his cheeks heat but he wasn’t ashamed. Hottest. Night. Ever.
“Dude, that was hot to watch. Andi better be home from work when I get there.” Kevin raised his glass in Steve’s direction. “Question though. Did she fucking kiss you?”
Steve chuckled. “No. Bit my lip.”
“Still impressed. She doesn’t get those gorgeous lips close to anyone. You’re my new hero.”
“Why not?” Steve wrinkled his forehead as he struggled to hear Kevin over the music.
“Her rule about kissing. Something about not kissing anyone unless she’s in love. I tested her. She slapped me. Of course, that was a huge turn on for me.” Kevin continued talking but Steve tuned him out.
His phone buzzed. The way you make my heart feel.
He smiled. She hadn’t said body. She’d said heart. He threw the rest of his beer back. He had a decision to make. It was full speed ahead or put on the emergency brake. They couldn’t stay on this middle ground. They were forever. Now they needed to decide which forever was theirs. Friends or lovers.
Chapter 8
Sitting at lunch the next day, Steve’s stomach was in knots. After the party, the girls had gone back to Layla and Ryan’s house and had a slumber party. He and Kevin had considered crashing it until Andi called not feeling well. Kevin had raced home and Steve had been left alone at the apartment. The silence of being alone had blanketed him and he felt smothered. He never knew silence could be so loud. His mind had not shut off the entire night. After two hours of fitful sleep, he had called Mark to meet him for lunch.
“Have you considered the possibility that she might love you? It looked like that to us last night.” Mark took a sip of his water and pushed his plate away.
“I didn’t say anything about love.” He pushed the heels of his hands into his eyes and groaned. “What happens if I tell her I’m having all these feelings and she runs? I’ve never had anyone in my life like her. Her friendship means more than I can even tell you.”
“I get it, brother. I do. It’s how I feel about Molly. If I couldn’t spend time with Soph, I would rather be with Molly than anyone else. Your issue is that she’s your Sophie and your Molly.”
“Fuck.” Steve threw his napkin on top of his uneaten lunch and looked at his hands. “I don’t know.”
“I was an asshole when I met Sophie. I spent every night trying to get into someone’s pants. I met her and everything changed. I don’t want one day without her. She’s my person. If you love Lily, you need to dive in. Don’t think. Just tell her. Like ripping off a Band-Aid. If she doesn’t feel the same, then you spend as much time as you have to convincing her she’s wrong.”
Steve laughed. He had known Mark his entire life. Hearing advice on falling in love and staying in love from the one person he was sure would never settle down was almost comical. “I’ll think about it. I will.”
“Shit.” Mark shook his head and stood. “Don’t even think about coming over here.”
Steve cringed when he heard the voice that responded.
“I didn’t come over here to see you so sit back down. Besides, he should hate you too. You were part of it.”
“Amber.” Steve cursed under his breath. “What can I do for you?”
In true Amber fashion, she sat down next Mark and smiled as she poked her chest out a little farther. Her red hair, the color of fire, used to be a turn on to Steve. Now it just made him angry. The smug look on her face made him ball his fists. A muscle ticked in his jaw.
“What’s the matter baby? Why so tense?” She reached out and ran one artificial nail up his arm. He felt sick.
“Don’t call me baby and get to the point.” Steve growled.
“I tried to call you yesterday to say happy birthday. I was hoping to be able to see you for a little while.” Amber pouted.
“What the fuck for Amber?” Steve’s harshness made Mark laugh.
“I would like to know the answer to that too. I can’t think of a worse birthday present so do tell.” Mark crossed his arms over his chest.
“Stevie,” she whined. “Don’t be like this. I miss you. I thought maybe we could get together and talk or something.”
The bell over the door rang and Mark visually relaxed as he noticed Sophie and Lily coming in. They scanned the restaurant for somewhere to sit but seeing Mark, they headed toward their table. Steve’s back remained to them, his body language screaming how uncomfortable he was.
Amber reached out and took his hand but Steve pulled it away like he’d been shocked. “I can’t stress this enough. I want you to go away. There isn’t a chance in hell that we’ll be talking or doing whatever the something was supposed to mean. You fucked my best friend. You fucked my coworker and you’ve probably fucked half of Los Angeles. I gave you everything I had. The only thing you gave me was an emergency visit to my doctor to make sure I was clean after I heard the laundry list of people you had done while we were engaged. If you want to give me something for my birthday, how about your back as you walk away from this table? That would be an amazing present.”
“Don’t be an asshole. I made a mistake. Do I have to pay for that forever?” Her whining voice made Steve want to punch the table.
“There you are baby.” Steve jumped when he heard Lily’s voice. “I was waiting for you at home.”
“Home?” Amber glared as Lily sat down next to Steve and took his hand.
“Have we met?” Lily popped her gum and threw her blond hair over her shoulder. Steve almost laughed as he watched the show.
“No, we absolutely have not met. Who are you?” Amber glared at their joined hands.
“Oh dear. I don’t like not knowing my pookie’s friends. My name is Lily. I’m his.” She extended her hand but Amber didn’t take it.
“I’m leaving. When you come to your senses and drop the bimbo, give me a call.” Amber stormed off and they all laughed.
“Thank you.” Steve made eye contact and was captivated. Lily’s sparkling blue eyes looked back at him with so much promise. Her tanned skin was so smooth and flawless. Her makeup was natural and her laugh was musical. She was exactly the opposite of Amber in every way. He shivered. She was so beautiful. Was he in love with her?
“Anytime pookie.” Lily laughed and picked up a french-fry. “So that was the legendary Amber, huh? Not what I expected.”
Steve chuckled. “It’s amazing the shit you notice when you aren’t desperate to keep someone. I can’t believe I was so blind.”
“Happens to the best of us, man.” Mark laughed when Sophie punched him in the arm. “Think about what we talked about. I’m taking Soph to get some shoes. It looks like it will be a magical day.”
Steve laughed as Sophie’s jaw dropped. Seeing them together warmed his heart. Could he have that with Lily? The thought both terrified and excited him. He needed to tell her how he felt.
&nbs
p; “So what’s on your agenda today?” Steve asked, noticing Lily’s eyes sweeping the room.
“Are we ok? Did last night change anything? I just need to make sure before I tell you what I need to tell you.” Lily’s voice was quiet.
“Lil, we’re great. You can tell me anything. I want to talk to you too. You go first though.” Steve put his hands on hers to stop them from fidgeting.
“The LA music awards are next weekend. Liquid Regret is performing and I told Damien I would go with him. He’s supposed to meet me here to take me shopping.” Lily let out a nervous giggle. “I don’t know why I was nervous telling you that. It’s stupid. I know I can talk to you. I was just so worried after last night. He says his publicist thinks he needs to have a date. Anything to stir up something in the media. You know how it is”
Steve wanted to throw up. He was one of the hosts of the show and hadn’t thought of asking her to come because he would be so busy. Knowing that she would be there on Damien’s arm, smiling, being photographed with the lead singer, made him extremely jealous. He knew he needed to say something. She was just staring at him awaiting an answer. His body flushed with anger.
“Is it hot in here?” Steve grabbed the rest of Mark’s water and tossed it back. When Lily didn’t answer, he felt the need to keep talking. “I’m suddenly really hot. Are you hot?”
“Are you ok?” Lily giggled and handed him her water.
Steve took a deep breath. “I need to be honest with you. Last night was a little different for me. Looking into your eyes. It was…” He paused trying to gather his thoughts. “Intimate. It was different than the night in my room. It was more. It felt real. Is any of this making sense?”
Lily nodded so Steve continued. “I don’t want you calling Damien if you’re lonely or need someone. I want that to be my job. I know that could change things but last night kind of already did.”
“What are you saying, Steve?”
“I don’t know exactly. My head is all over the place. I haven’t stopped thinking about last night. And then this.” He pulled her hand to his heart. “I didn’t ask you to the awards show because I knew I would be so busy and I didn’t want to leave you sitting alone. I never considered the possibility that he might ask you. I just got really fucking jealous.”
“Steve.” Lily’s eyes widened. “I don’t have to go. I said yes because I knew you were hosting and I wanted to see you. I can tell Damien no. He’ll understand.”
Steve ran his hands through his hair and sighed. “You need to go, Lil. He’s my cousin and he likes you.”
“I’m sorry.” She ran her hand over his cheek. “Is that what you wanted to talk about?”
Steve shook his head and started to speak. “There’s more. I don’t know how to say it.” He noticed movement next to them. Looking up, he saw Damien standing there grinning at Lily.
“Am I interrupting?” Even his voice screamed rock star. Steve rolled his eyes.
“It’s cool. We can talk later. Thanks for the save back there, Lil. I’ll see you at home.” Steve threw some money on the table and turned to leave.
“Don’t wait up, bro.” Damien winked at him. “I’ll have her home sometime before daylight.”
As they walked away, Steve pulled out his phone. He smiled as Lily pulled hers from her pocket to read it.
‘The way your smile lights up your entire face’
Chapter 9
“Red.” Damien winked at Lily. “You’re the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. You should stand out. So, red.”
Lily stopped looking through the dresses and stared at him. “That’s the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.”
Damien stepped toward her and took her hand. Lifting it to his mouth, he kissed it gently. “Lil bit, you have no idea what you do to me. Being with you in Atlanta was great. I’m smitten. Love would be so easy with you.”
“I don’t know what to say to that.” Lily pulled a red dress from the hanger and hugged it to her body. “I’m going to try this on.”
Her hands shook as she undressed. She really liked Damien. Every time they were together, she laughed and his touch was welcomed. They held hands like they had been doing it forever. If she was honest with herself, there were a lot of things she liked about him. He was a gentleman and being from the South, she was used to that. He held doors, looked people in the eyes when they talked, and regardless of who was with them, he acted like she was the only one in the room. He was so handsome that she got weak at the knees. The one problem? The fundamental issue with a relationship with him? He wasn’t Steve.
Steve was a mystery. He had been so withdrawn from anything dealing with love. But lately, he had been more physical, more flirty, just more. She had caught him looking at her several times. He was smiling more. He was becoming someone she couldn’t stay away from. She wanted him. More than anything ever before, she wanted him to be by her side and give them a try. He was trying to open up and his effort was refreshing.
Smiling at herself in the mirror, she pulled her hair up into a knot on the top of her head. The dress was gorgeous. Red with a black lace overlay and an open back. She stepped from the dressing room and Damien groaned. She giggled at his reaction.
“I could look at you all day.” Damien stared.
“You haven’t seen the best part.” Lily winked and turned her back to him.
Her skin was tanned and his mouth watered. The dress dipped dangerously low in back and he longed to touch her. He knew she would be soft and perfect. He stepped forward and ran his hand across her bare skin. She shivered and he bit his lip. “We don’t need to look any further. This is it. I’m one lucky son of a bitch.”
When Damien handed the dress to the saleswoman, she smiled and took his credit card. Lily protested his paying for the dress but he wouldn’t budge. “You are the most gorgeous woman in the world. You should have a gorgeous dress. If I could give you the world, I would.”
She blushed. Damien had never seen that from her and it did crazy things to his heart. He pulled her to him, wrapping his arms around her waist and hugging her close. She put her head on his chest and could hear his heart pounding.
“I’m sorry about your sister. It was a stupid move. I freaked when I realized how much you mean to me.” He kissed the top of her head. “Is there a chance for us?”
Lily sighed. “I like being with you. It’s easy and you’re fun.”
“What’s holding you back?” Damien rubbed her arms and smiled at her. “Is there someone else?”
“The truth? I don’t know. A part of my heart belongs to someone and I don’t know what to do about that.” Lily’s eyes filled with tears.
Using his thumb, he brushed her tears away. “There’s never been any pressure with us. Take your time and figure it out. I’m here when you’re ready.”
She held his hand as they left the store. Her heart was so full but her head was torn. The man she thought she could give the world to wasn’t ready for love. The man that so desperately wanted to give her the world, wasn’t the man she was already falling for.
Steve rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands. Jennifer’s tears echoed through his head. Her hysterical voice had awakened him from a dead sleep. “Calm down, J.” He tried to keep the emotion out of his voice. “Take a deep breath. I know you want to scream. Calm down and tell me what happened.”
Jennifer sobbed on the other end of the phone. “Ben cheated on me. He packed all his stuff tonight. He says he loves her and wants to be with her.”
Steve’s voice shook. “I’m so sorry.” Tears filled his eyes. His wounds were still fresh. Amber had not only broken his heart, she had shattered the person he had been. “Do you want me to come over?”
“I just want you to tell me what to do. How do I get over this? It hurts so much.”
“Cry. That’s all you can do tonight. It’s hard, J. I know exactly what you’re feeling. Just let yourself fall apart. I’m here for you. I’ll cover your portion of the s
how tomorrow morning and I’ll swing by on my way home.”
“Ok.” Jennifer’s voice was sleepy. “I’ll call you if I need you.”
Steve hung up his phone and headed to his dresser. He had contemplated putting Amber’s ring away so many times in the last week. Lily had opened his eyes and he had thought that there might be a piece of his heart that craved her love. The phone call from Jennifer had reminded him about how cruel life could be. Taking a risk on love wasn’t something he was willing to do. Being alone was far better than ever being vulnerable again.
His hands shook as he remembered the look on Amber’s face when he walked into their bedroom that night. Her body wrapped around one of his friends, her smirk had been the first thing he noticed. She had made it such a performance; like she had rehearsed what she would say when she got caught. And she probably had. She had likely never been faithful to him. The thought made his stomach churn as a wave of nausea hit him.
“I didn’t think you’d be awake.” Lily leaned in the doorframe and watched him as he ran his hands over the ring box. “Everything ok?”
His bloodshot eyes met her and Lily took a step into the room. “I just got off the phone with Jen. Her boyfriend cheated on her. Just opened up some old wounds.”
Lily took his hands and led him to his bed. “I’m so sorry to hear that. Are you going over there? I can drive you.”
Steve took a deep breath and smiled. “You’re a good person, Lil. You really are.” He leaned into her as she rubbed his back. “How was your shopping with the rock star?”
“It was fine. I was hoping we could talk?” Steve focused his attention on her. “I need to know how you feel about me.”
His forehead wrinkled in thought. “I love you, Lil. You know that.”
“Damien asked me out tonight. Not just on a date. Like, asked me to date him. Exclusively.”
“Fuck.” Steve laid back on the bed and threw his arm over his eyes. “I can’t do this right now.”
Lily crawled over his lap, straddling him and whispered. “I need to do this right now.”
