Silver & Black

by Tyler May

  ~Chapter Two~

  They’ve been in that corner for over an hour: talking, laughing, and at one point I see Jeff get angry. I know they’re talking about me because Silver keeps looking my way and then Jeff turns and looks as well. What I wouldn’t give to be able to read lips right now. Jeff makes some weird hand gestures. Silver throws his head back and laughs. The guy has a personality, who knew. I can’t stop myself from staring at Silver. He’s actually very handsome when he laughs. Actually, he’s pretty handsome doing just about anything. Ok, he is fucking hot; I’m not going to lie. Thoughts cloud my mind, and I realize I’m staring just a little too long. I shake my head, and go back to cleaning the blenders, this way I can’t see them talking. The wondering is killing me. Another hour goes by. What can they be discussing for TWO hours?

  “Why don’t you take your break?” the other barista asks. She knows about Jeff and me and can tell I am stressing. She whispers, “Just sneak out the back and have a cigarette. It’ll calm you. You have fifteen minutes anyway.” I nod and casually go into the back room, trying not to make it obvious I was taking a break. Don’t want to piss off Silver. I’d like to finish my smoke this time.

  I walk out. Silver’s driver is still sitting in the car. He doesn’t acknowledge I’m there. Fine with me―do as your boss orders. My smoke break must have set off a signal because just as I was going to light the cigarette, Silver comes out scrolling through his cellphone. He stops and glares at me, “Another―really?” He reaches for it, and I stop his hand this time.

  “I’m on my break. I need this cigarette. Don’t touch it.” He does not look happy.

  “I’m not used to people talking to me like that, especially people that work for me.” He runs his hand down my arm to my hand, grabs the lighter, and takes it from me. He strikes the igniter and holds it up for me to light my smoke. I lean in and puff. Is it sad that I think this was totally erotic? “You might want to watch the way you talk to me, Mr. Black.”

  “Since you’re not around a lot, I don’t think you or I have anything to worry about.” He laughs at my words. “Why is this funny? It’s true. I’ve worked here for two years and have never seen you here, so why should I worry?”

  “I like you, Mr. Black. You’re very charismatic.” What is that supposed to mean? I choose to ignore him and casually scan the alley. He walks to his car. The driver gets out and opens the passenger door. Silver pulls his sunglasses back over his eyes and looks at me. “We’ll be seeing a lot more of each other. I promise you that. Remember the world is far too big for everything to be a coincidence.” He gives one last grin before getting in the car. The driver shuts his door, and they pull away.

  After all this, I’m glad he didn’t stick around after he bought me all those drinks, and he did buy a lot, but now that I know he owns the place, did he even really buy them? Not my worry. He’s not really my type. Those eyes and dark hair are killers for sure. He wears confidence as well as he does those designer clothes. That’s hot too. He’s not my type. “God, I act like I’m trying to convince myself,” I mumble to no one. Something about him intrigues me.

  After finishing my smoke and my pep talk to myself, I go back into the coffee shop. Jeff is in the office. I peek in and say hello. Not knowing what they were talking about kills me. He seems uneasy. “Are you ok? Did he say something to you?”

  “Grey, come in and sit down.” His voice is different. He stands from his desk chair and walks to the chair next to mine. He sits and puts his hand on my knee. “He had a lot to say: starting with the fact that my coffeehouse is one of his largest grossing corporation’s for a suburb of Manhattan.” He is so happy, hell I am happy for him.

  “That’s great. Does it come with a plaque or something? Maybe a crown?” I hold my hand over my head trying to make him laugh.

  “You are so fucking cute.” His smile goes to a frown. “He doesn’t want me seeing you anymore.”

  “Why is it any of his business what we do behind closed doors? He can’t tell you not to sleep with somebody.”

  He stands up and starts to pace. “I’m his cooperate manager here. I work for him. Eventually I want to purchase this franchise from him. So technically, no, he can’t, but I was going to tell you tonight.” He stops and looks at me. He takes a deep breath. “I’m seeing someone else and I really see it going somewhere.” I don’t know what to say. Jeff and I have been together for a while. Yeah, we weren’t official, but we were constant. All I can do is gaze in disbelief at the floor. Why am I so hurt by this? He’s always told me it wouldn’t go anywhere. “Grey? Look at me.” He lifts my chin with his finger to make me look into his eyes. “I’m sorry if I hurt you.”

  “You didn’t,” I lie, trying to hold on to some form of pride. “The way you asked me to go out tonight, I thought we were going to….” Have sex!

  “You’re going to think I’m horrible, but I’m going to be honest.” He lowers himself to his knees in front of me and takes my hands. “I wanted one last night with you.”

  “So you weren’t going to tell me until after you fucked me?” I brace myself for his answer. Although, I’m sure I already know it.

  He sighs and runs his hand through his hair. “I don’t know how to quit you. I just wanted to feel you one last time.” Damn his words. Damn him. Fuck all this.

  “A woman?”

  “Yeah, she’s great. You’d like her.” Doubt that. I just nod like a fool that has just had his heart ripped out. Jeff was my constant. A part of me always thought he’d want more someday. How naïve was I? He just sits there on his knees in front of me staring at me and all I can do is look to the wall beside him. I can’t even make eye contact because I’m afraid I might cry. I don’t fucking cry and I hate that I’m feeling this way right now.

  “Is that all? Or did he say more. I mean you guys were talking about me. I saw the stares.” I still don’t make eye contact.

  “That’s it. He asked what I thought about you.”

  “And?”

  “And I told him I thought you were great. Grey, please look at me.” Fuck! I close my eyes as they start to tear. “Grey, please. Fuck, come on, baby.” He cups my face.

  I push his hand away. “Don’t call me baby, Jeff. Are we done here? I have to go back to work.”

  “Sure.” He moves to let me stand. I walk toward the door, but he stops me by grabbing my arm.

  “Please, let me go,” I mutter. He pulls my back to his chest and kisses the side of my neck. “Don’t,” is all I could say as I close my eyes and hope he would listen. He yanks me around to his face; my eyes still shut. I can’t look at him. I just shake my head. Fuck the tears that decide now to drop from my eyes.

  “Oh, baby, I am so sorry.” He wipes the wetness away from my face and I finally open my damp eyes. “I never realized how much you…” He leans in and kisses me. My heart sinks into my stomach and I pull away. “Grey?” I shake my head, turn, and walk out of his office leaving part of my heart with him.

  The rest of the day is horrible. I spend most of the time avoiding Jeff and he spends most of his time trying to talk to me. How am I going to work like this every day? I can’t. Four o’clock hits, and I am out of there. I can’t stand to be there anymore. I walk to the subway as fast as I can. It isn’t that far from my apartment in Rose Hill. It’s a decent neighborhood, it’s close to the university, and the rent is controlled thanks to my roommate’s grandfather. Levi, my roommate, is working late tonight, so I’ll have the entire place to myself. I need it too. I just want to crack open a bottle of whatever frilly wine Levi has and drink my pain away. I get off the subway and walk the few blocks to my apartment building. I can see Levi in the window as I look up to the five-story building. He hasn’t left yet. I could use a hug.

  I love Levi, but we’ll always be just friends. Levi is outspoken, loud, and sparkly. I’m not being rude by calling him sparkly, he loves it and he’d tell anyone that himself. “Sparkle” is what his man friends have nicknamed him when
he works at the local gay bar. I’m very type specific when it comes to men. I want a manly man. I want a sexy and handsome man. I want him to be able to wrestle and then make love to me. Like I said I love Levi, but he’s not the manly man type and that’s ok. He’s very handsome, though. Any man that’s lucky enough to have Levi should count himself very fortunate. I open the door and Levi knows right away.

  “Oh, sweetie, what’d he do this time?” He comes right over and hugs me. “I know some guys that can kick his ass. I’d do it, but let’s be real.” He flares his hands. I throw my head back and laugh. He cracks me up.

  “He didn’t do anything, Levi. It’s over and I should have known.”

  “Well, if you ask me it’s his loss, sweetheart.” He gathers his stuff for work. “Will you be ok? I feel bad leaving you.”

  “No, I’m good. I’d really like to be alone with your bottle of wine anyway.”

  “Oh, she’s a good brand. She’ll keep you nice and warm,” he says through a quirky smile. He leans on me and starts to straighten my shirt. “Look at you all in shambles. You are going to find a man that will treat you like the prince you are and then you’ll never email or call and I’ll have to hire a hit man to come find you and bring you back to me.” He laughs.

  “I don’t have much faith anymore.” I plop my sappy ass on the couch.

  “Oh please, child. You are gorgeous. Look at this face and those caramel-brown eyes and don’t even get me started on your body. Mmhmm, MY GOD!” He fans himself. “I could grate cheese on that chest of yours. You are every man’s wet dream. You’ve just been wrapped up in Jeff’s world too long. I know it doesn’t feel like it, but this is going to be the best thing that’s ever happened to you.” He stands and pulls his bag on his shoulder then walks to the door. “I see good things in your future, honey.” He opens the door and gasps, only the way Levi could. He turns to me and winks. “See,” he says as he walks out. I think he’s just being typical Levi until I see Silver standing in my doorway. What the hell is he doing here and how does he know where I live?

  “Uh, Mr. Silver, what are you doing here?” I stand a little nervous.

  “I saw you leave the coffeehouse. I went back to talk to Jeffery and he told me what happened. I came to make sure you were ok, and to explain.”

  I cut him off. “Why do you care? You asked him to stop seeing me. You got your way.”

  “May I come in?” I nod, and he steps in closing the door behind him. He is quiet, too quiet. What’d he do come here just to stare again? Maybe I am just eye candy. I sigh and walk over to the canister box on the corner table. I open it and pull out a rolled joint. It’s Levi’s, but he said I could smoke it if I ever had an [Oh shit moment] and we’re here. I light it and inhale sharply. I just want to make this shitty day go away in one big puff of smoke. “You smoke pot as well?” Knew that was coming.

  “No, not usually. My roommate does and he keeps it here just in case I ever need it.” I hit it again and blow out. “Is that a problem?” I hold it out to him and he shakes his head. “Don’t do anything like this?”

  “I have to have a clear mind. Was that your roommate that just left?” He takes a deep breath and loops his thumb into his pants pocket.

  “Yeah, Levi. He’s a nice guy, and don’t think I didn’t notice you didn’t answer my question there.” I hold out the joint again and he holds his hand up to say no. “Suit yourself, but this is my place. Don’t come in here telling me not to do something.” I sit on the couch and put my head back. The effect is already working. He comes over and joins me on the couch. I look at him. I’m sure I already look toasted because I feel it. “You came all this way just to see if I was ok?”

  “No, I came to―” his words are interrupted by a knock on my door, a constant nagging knock.

  “One second. Let me see who this idiot is.” I hand him the joint and he reluctantly takes it to hold. I float to the door―that pot is great―and open it.

  “What the fuck is this about?” Jeff screams holding up his phone. I had texted him on the way home and told him I couldn’t work for him anymore. “What do mean you quit?” I push him in the hall and shut the door. I don’t want Silver hearing any more than he just did. Jeff starts to pace the hall. “You can’t quit, Grey. You can’t.”

  “I think it will be easier for both of us. You really want your relationship to work and I can’t be around you.” He rolls his head back and exhales with sadness.

  “I can’t do this, Grey. I never imagined that you would quit. I can’t lose you completely.” He pushes me to the wall. “I can’t.”

  “You ended things; what do you want?” His nose touches mine.

  “Are you high? You smell like pot.” I can’t help it, I start laughing like a kid that just got caught by his parents. “Oh my God, you are.” He smiles and my cock starts to tingle. His smile gets me every time. He rubs his hands around my hips and rests them on the base of my back. He moves in close pinning me motionless. I can’t breathe. His eyes fill with lust, I’ve seen it before, and he leans against me, kissing my lips. At first he’s gentle, sucking lightly on my lips and then he goes hard. His tongue invades my mouth and it feels so good. He rests his forehead against mine, his chest heaving in and out. “I need you, Grey. I need to make love to you.” Oh, God. “Let’s go in please.”

  Fuck, Silver’s in there. “I’m not alone,” I say and he pulls away. “Mr. Silver is over.”

  “What the fuck is he doing here?”

  “I don’t know. He was just about to tell me when you knocked. Just come in, who cares what he thinks,” I say, and open the door without giving Jeff a chance of rebuttal. Whether Jeff likes it or not, Silver knows he’s here.

  ~Chapter Three~

  Silver is standing by the couch when I open the door. He had put the joint out in the ashtray. I’m pretty sure he heard us in the hall. Jeff looks like a deer in headlights. Why does he freeze like this? I grab Jeff’s hand and look at Silver. I could care less what he thinks of me and Jeff, or maybe it’s because I’m high and have no common sense right now. Who knows? Who cares? I want Jeff naked now.

  “Is this something we can talk about tomorrow? Jeff and I need to talk.” His face is serious and he frowns as I say those words, but he doesn’t respond. Instead, he looks Jeff in the eyes. I can feel Jeff’s hand tense. “This has nothing to do with you. What we do when we’re not at work is none of your business.” Ok, I said it. Someone had to; Jeff wasn’t going to man up.

  “You’re right. We can talk tomorrow.” Well, that was easy, too easy. He walks slowly to the door. He stops next to Jeff’s shoulder and glares at him. “Give Mr. Black my phone number.” Jeff nods, but doesn’t make eye contact with him. Grab your balls, baby. Be a man! Silver then turns his eyes to me. He smiles politely. “Have fun.” I think he actually means it. This pot has my mind messed up. This whole evening is a rollercoaster of emotions.

  “Thank you.” I let go of Jeff’s hand to hold the door for Silver as he walks out. I watch him get into the elevator, his eyes glued compellingly to mine. Why does his stare have so much of an impact on me? I feel heat growing in me after then the elevator doors shut.

  I turn back into my apartment and shut the door. Jeff is sitting in the chair. I stroll over to him and kneel in front. He smiles and pulls me up for a kiss. I reach for the buttons on his shirt and unbutton them one by one, kissing his chest with every clasp undone. He pulls my T-shirt off and throws it on the couch. I stand and straddle him in the chair. God, I just want him to take me now. Why do I do this to myself? He goes slowly: tasting every inch of my skin, caressing every part of me. I pull away and hold his face. His eyes are wet and then it hit me. I knew. This was it for him. I can’t move. I don’t want it to end. He strokes my face and rubs his thumb over my bottom lip. My eyes instinctively close at his touch. “Jeff, I don’t know if I can do this.”

  “Sure you can.” He pulls me into a passionate kiss.

  “You really mean it don’t y
ou? This is it.” He doesn’t say a word as his hands reach for the button on my jeans. “Jeff?” Oh, God, the tears start falling from his eyes.

  “I love you, Grey.” My heart fails. What? “I do. I love you.” I stand and just shake my head.

  “You love me, but you want to leave me?” For a woman!

  “It’s what I have to do.”

  “That makes no sense. Why are you doing this to me?” I sit and bury my head in my hands. He rushes to my side. “Why am I doing this to myself?”

  “My family is very conservative, Grey. If I bring a man home, I’ll never inherit.” I couldn’t believe he was saying that to me. “It’s my lifeline. It’s how I’ll eventually buy my franchise of Silver Coffee. They have expectations and truthfully, so do I.”

  “Fuck you and your expectations.” I get up and storm to the bathroom. The tears fall freely from my face and I don’t know if they’re from sadness or anger. Expectations?

  “Grey, I’m not explaining this very well.” Ha, you’re telling me! “Come out so we can talk, please. Let me see those big brown eyes of yours.” I open the door and walk past him to the couch. I hate that he thinks he can charm his way with me. I’m not easily wooed.

  “Please, don’t talk to me like I’m a child. I’m a man. I don’t need sugar coating.” I take the joint out of the ashtray and light it.

  “I never thought I would care for a man the way I do for you. It scares the shit out of me. I wasn’t raised like this.”

  “Like what? Gay?” I hit the joint again. He comes over and takes it from my hand and hits it himself.

  “I’m not gay. I have to be bi, if anything.” He has no clue. He’s been in denial too long. “I like women. I like Callie.”

  “Callie? Is that her name?” Of course, she would have to have a cute name too.