Love, Diamonds, and Spades

by Violet Duke

  The soft kiss he brushed across her lips was the last thing she remembered.

  * * * * *

  YEP, IT WAS OFFICIAL.

  He was going to have the worst case of blue balls in the history of mankind.

  But frankly, he didn’t care.

  Watching Quinn come apart before him was the hottest damn thing he’d ever seen in his life.

  And if he’d been an addict before, now, he was beyond saving completely. He’d meant every word he said earlier. He never even saw, let alone noticed any other women anymore.

  Just Quinn.

  She was so goddamn beautiful; he couldn’t believe she thought she wasn’t gorgeous enough. That was just insane. Didn’t she know what she did to him? How little control he had when he was around her? Hell, he’d had to stop himself from shredding her clothes the minute he’d felt her naked skin where a pair of panties should’ve been.

  Now as he played it back in his head, he realized beautiful wasn’t even the right word to describe her. There was only one word he could think of that could possibly fit.

  Mine.

  He repeated it to himself as he eventually tumbled into a bone-deep, comforted sleep with Quinn in his arms.

  Some time later, Rylan found himself in the middle of another scorching hot fantasy starring Quinn—they seemed to be coming nightly now.

  But tonight, the temptress was straight-up blowing his mind.

  He watched with his mind’s eye as she crawled up onto her knees and skimmed teasing little kisses all over his abdomen. Her hands followed, and blistering hot pleasure jolted through his body when her hand closed over him.

  Hands gripping the sheets, he clawed to stay tethered to the dream, fought back the need to wake up just yet. Screw his alarm, screw work. The only thing that mattered right now was that Quinn’s mouth was inching lower, and lower still, her breasts swaying over his clenched thighs, torturing him in tandem, making him so goddamn hard, he was losing his mind.

  Damn it. This fantasy was quickly turning into a wet dream and he was powerless to stop it.

  Her mouth closed over his head and raw, savage need flooded his veins.

  “Quinn.”

  He felt her smile and swipe two tiny, barely there licks across his flesh.

  Something dark and feral awoke inside him, gripping him at the edge of his hunger, shoving him past his limits. A man could only take so much.

  Rylan’s hands threaded through long strands of silky angel hair, and slowly registered the fact that he wasn’t dreaming…seconds before his eyes shot open to see Quinn’s now sharply dilated sapphire eyes watching him.

  Waiting for him.

  …Before her mouth slid down his hard, pulsing length.

  He let out on a guttural groan as she drew back and gently teased her tongue over him, tormented him.

  Dared him.

  His fingers clutched at her scalp and drew her closer. Deeper.

  At the sound of the demanding little moan vibrating all around him, he pumped harder into that hot, wicked mouth of hers.

  Every muscle in his body was strained tight as she worked her mouth up and down the length of him, nearly to the root. The hot, merciless suction drew his sanity right out of him, one slow stroke at a time, until he was nudging her throat.

  Instantly, she swallowed back another moan, and the rolling pressure caused him to thrust deeper into her mouth. Raw, agonized pleasure coursed through him the deeper he went.

  Her fingers squeezed the base of his erection as the one and only warning he got before she plunged her mouth down his entire length and drew back to suck hard and fast, matching him thrust for thrust.

  A hoarse sound ripped out of his throat as he came, harder than he ever had in his life.

  Flashing lights and fractured images of Quinn pressing gentle kisses on his skin swam in his vision while quick-drying cement flooded his limbs. Even his eyelids felt drained.

  Even so, when he felt Quinn’s sexy little body curl up against his, he found the strength to wrap his arms around her and pull her in tighter.

  She snuggled her face against his neck, and draped herself over his torso like a human blanket.

  Soft and sweet, his little hellcat fit against him perfectly.

  And he had no intention of letting her go any time soon.

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  “I DON’T THINK I’VE ever loved anything more in my entire life.”

  Quinn wasn’t surprised by Rylan’s declaration. She was amused by it though. Never had she seen a person so enamored with a set of brand new bed sheets.

  Over the past few weeks, they’d had every single one of their dates at her house. This was their first time at his place, and she’d prepared for the weekend by hitting up a bunch of discount and big box stores to find the silkiest 2,000 thread count Egyptian sheet set she could afford.

  She’d gotten a killer deal since the package only had the fitted sheet, but it fit her budget perfectly. After another hour of rabid bargain shopping, she’d found pillowcases that were a close match as well.

  When Rylan had first opened his front door and caught sight of the shiny new sheets in her hands, his nostrils flared as he took in the scent of laundry detergent. The effect had his eyes fighting a hard, tormented battle between staring at her face and staring at the sheets.

  Funniest thing ever.

  Her laughter seemed to break the back and forth Wimbledon trance and within seconds, he was nabbing her elbow and rushing them over to the bedroom to swap out his sheets.

  He groaned out in appreciative bliss a minute later when he discovered that she’d washed and made the sheets extra soft and fluffy with the same softener scent she used for her towels—a few of which, she was now finding, seemed to have sprouted legs and walked from her house to his.

  The powder blue towels serving as pseudo pillowcases were hard to miss.

  While up until this point, she’d mainly found his never ending frustration with ‘evil’ laundry wash and dry cycles amusing, and his reverence over her soft bath towels endearing, it wasn’t until she actually felt all the scratchy sheets, and brillo pad like towels, and stiff as paper pillow cases in his apartment that she realized just how bad he really was at doing the laundry.

  The last corner of the soft new sheets was barely tucked under the mattress before he dragged her down onto the bed and let out a deep, rumbling purr, burrowing in the sheets and pillow case like a big, brawny lion.

  A long sigh of pleasure whooshed out of him and he sat up to pull her onto the bed, tucking her against him contentedly.

  “Thank you, sweetheart. This is the best present you could’ve given me.”

  * * * * *

  RYLAN TOOK IN the soft glow of pleasure lighting her face. Next to her blushes, these were his second favorite. And he loved that this particular glow had been the result of her getting him a gift. The sweetest gift he could’ve imagined.

  Twining her long legs with his, he felt her run the tip of her index finger over his bicep and then up to trace his tattoo.

  He groaned silently. Everywhere she touched always seemed to become a live current of electricity.

  “You know that first day we saw each other?” she asked, rubbing her finger in tiny circles over his now over-sensitized skin.

  “Yeah?” All he could focus on was each stroke sending a lightning bolt of arousal down his body, looking for the most explosive means of freedom.

  “I couldn’t take my eyes off your arms. Every time you weren’t looking, I’d sneak a peek, trying to see more than just the curling edges of your tattoo every time your sleeve rode up those massive biceps of yours.”

  He made a non-descript sound, because, in all honesty, he hadn’t heard a thing she’d just said.

  She looked at him expectantly.

  Criminy. She’d just asked him a question, hadn’t she?

  He shoved down the roar of blood in his ears when her tongue licked over the tattoo on the inside of his forearm.


  “Is that a no?” she asked, lips twitching in amusement.

  Damn, he caught her.

  “I didn’t hear what you said, sweetie, I’m sorry.”

  “Oh, well it was no big deal.” She shrugged and half-rose from the bed. “I was just asking if you wanted to christen these new sheets, is all.”

  He clamped his hands on her hips and flipped her back onto the bed.

  Laughing, she wrapped her arms around his neck. “So I guess that’s a yes.”

  He skimmed his lips across her shoulder, smiling against her skin. “That’s a hell yes.”

  The soft, happy sigh slipping past her lips had his chest tightening with emotion just as he felt her teeth nip along his jawline.

  Hell. He needed to calm down and regain some control.

  A futile mission, he decided soon after when she then ran her palms across his abs, slowly, as if it were an immense pleasure just to feel him.

  Spearing his hands through her hair, he opened his mouth against her skin to taste her.

  Always so sweet.

  Another sigh, accompanied by a sexy, feminine shiver had him pulling back, even as his hands flexed against her hips.

  “You’re a menace to my control,” he rasped.

  “Right back at you,” she tossed back as she tugged at his shirt.

  Their clothes flew off soon after at an alarming speed, but still it didn’t feel fast enough.

  Already hard enough to hammer nails, he quickly reached for a condom, knowing he would never have the presence of mind to do so later.

  As he slipped it on, he let out a low groan, raw and tortured, when he felt his knuckles graze her hot, slick core. So wet.

  Turning his hand gently, he slipped a finger deep inside her, reveling in the wild cry that left her lips as her hips arched and silently asked for more. Her limbs began trembling as he captured a berry ripe nipple in his mouth, tugged and caressed as he slowly slid between her legs.

  Damn. He’d thought he was hungry for her before, but now he was downright starving.

  With his hard length nudging against her scorching hot heat, he gripped her hips and plunged deep inside her with one long stroke.

  Her hands clutched at his biceps and slid down to manacle his wrists. Planted beside her head, she held on to them for leverage as she bucked up to meet and deepen his thrusts.

  Eyes locking on his, she smiled a secret utterly female smile and kissed him from the inside out, gentle rolling pulses that squeezed over his hard length, made him release a harsh sound of pleasure. Her sapphire eyes darkened, grew so turbulent with emotion, he felt the force of his thrusts increase, her eyes dilating even more with every plunge.

  Her cries quickly dissolved into spasms of pleasure that tightened over him like a hot, silken vise. He was lost in the moment. Ready to come, but wanting this never to end.

  Rylan, please. Harder. More.

  Her words echoed in his head, stripping the last of his control.

  With gentle rough fingers, he reached between them and stoked the flame hotter, reveled in her inner muscles rippling over him as she let out a soft, lust-glittered moan. She angled her hips then, taking him deeper. Just once.

  And he lost it.

  His entire body went rigid, his world detonating with the force of her orgasm that sent him spiraling over the edge.

  With her name on his lips, he surged into her one last time and plunged into darkness.

  * * * * *

  WHEN HE RESURFACED back to the land of the living, he found her awake, again tracing a finger over his tattoo, mind clearly chugging away.

  “What are you thinking about, baby?”

  She sat up and he immediately felt the loss bang against his chest. “Come back and cuddle with me, woman.”

  A smile peeked through at that rough demand but she maintained her interrogation face.

  He sighed, wondering what was going on in that busy little head of hers.

  “Were you holding back earlier? During all the sex, I mean?” A faint blush pinked her cheeks and he almost lost track of the questioning. It never ceased to amaze him—and turn him on—how she could be his ferocious little hellcat one second, and his shy, sweet kitten the next.

  “Was I holding back? Not at all. Why, were you?” He raised a brow. “Are you about to crush my fragile male ego?”

  She laughed. “I think you have plenty ego left on reserve. But seriously, you weren’t holding back on anything? As in things you like?”

  “I like you.”

  “I’m being serious.”

  “No, you’re being weird.” He sighed and tucked his arms behind his head. “Just say what you’re trying to say.”

  After a pregnant pause, she looked him in the eye and said in one long exhale, “I know you’re a dom, and that you like to go to BDSM clubs.”

  He blinked at her for a second and then cursed.

  “So it’s true!”

  Thankfully that wasn’t sheer horror on her face. More a cross between curiosity, amusement, and a tiny bit of hurt, along with a whole lot of questions.

  “Who’d you hear that from?” he asked shaking his head tiredly. “Dani? Xoey?”

  “Yes.”

  He paused and then rolled his eyes. “Well that explains some very weird Christmas gifts I got last year.”

  “From Dani or Xoey?”

  He chuckled. “Dani. Xoey always gives me weird gifts.”

  She tilted her head. “Why didn’t you tell me? That you were into all that whole dom and sub thing.”

  “I’m not.”

  “But…”

  “Quinn, I’m not a dom. But…my ex, Lacey, was a sub. That is, she realized she was a sub while we were dating.”

  Quinn wrapped her arms around her legs and tucked her chin on her knees. “Really? That must have been hard on you two.”

  He loved this about her. That he could just talk to her about anything, even the bizarre and uncomfortable.

  “It was hard. She started researching it heavily and throwing herself into the lifestyle. But I wasn’t in to it. She kept saying if I loved her, I should at least try it.”

  A look of annoyance flitted across Quinn’s face and he almost reached out and kissed her for that. “It wasn’t all bad. But after about six months, I discovered she was becoming obsessed with the lifestyle—in an outsider-looking-in way. Everything about her changed…or no, that’s not right. I think her true inner self just came rushing out all at once.”

  With a heavy sigh, he closed his eyes and tried not to let those long few months fill him with the black sticky webs of discontent and at times, pure misery, as it had back then.

  “Because she didn’t have a dom to help her, she sort of just…lost it. I’ve been told that if she’d had a dom to guide her, or more folks in the lifestyle to help her, she wouldn’t have unraveled the way she did. But basically, she started needing me to tell her what to wear, who to be friends with, how to act, when to talk. When and if to use the bathroom, when and if she should eat. And she wanted to be punished for things, she wanted to punish herself, rather. Almost cruelly. Not for the sake of pain, but almost like she was going crazy in her own skin.”

  Now, Quinn did look horrified.

  Yeah. That’s how it’d been for him too.

  “Then one day, she tried to commit suicide.”

  Quinn gasped.

  “I tried to get her to go to a therapist and she did for a while. Some helped a little but it was still like she was wearing someone else’s skin, going crazy scratching at it to try and tear it off.” He exhaled roughly. “Honestly, I knew I couldn’t go through another six months like the six prior so I made myself think outside the box.”

  Quinn’s eyes widened. “That’s why you went to the BDSM clubs.”

  He nodded. “But not in the way you’re thinking. I really have no interest in the lifestyle. But I found doms who folks recommended I talk to and I had them meet Lacey. By then, she was a shell of a human, nearly br
oken. I couldn’t send her out into a new world—even if it was clearly the world she’d always been meant to be in—without watching out for her.”

  “So I spent a few weeks with her in the clubs, and I interviewed a bunch of doms for her. Eventually, she started to come to life. After a month, I met one dom I just knew was going to be a good fit for her. So I introduced them, threatened his life if he hurt her, of course. And then finally let her go.”

  For a while, he just let the silence sink in. Almost like the thud of a book closing with the words, ‘The End.’

  When he looked up at Quinn, he found she was just staring at him, shaking her head. “You’re just…you’re an amazing guy. You know that, right? I don’t know a single person who would go through everything you just explained.”

  Uncomfortable with the adoration he saw shining in her eyes, he gazed up at the ceiling. “I’m not that amazing.”

  Two soft female hands cupped his jaw and turned his face back towards hers. “Yes. You are.”

  “I couldn’t love her the way she needed, be what she needed. And because of me, she almost died.”

  “Rylan, because of you, she lived. Have you heard from her since?”

  “Once. She’s pretty far immersed in the world but she did contact me once.”

  “And?”

  “She’s happy. Finally. She sounded really happy.”

  Quinn studied him for a bit. “You’ve never told anyone this have you?”

  “No. I didn’t want folks to judge her.”

  “So you had no one to ask you how you were doing during it all, after it all.”

  He almost choked on the emotions in his throat. “No.”

  A silent beat passed before she asked, “Were you okay during it all, after it all?”

  “Not really. I’d felt like every emotion I possessed had been slaughtered in a war that I didn’t even know I’d been fighting until I was cornered and almost crushed. My heart had felt ripped to shreds. Not because she’d broken it, but because it’d been wrung dry, clawed at, twisted around, and cracked open. Shredded. It’d been shredded. But the sad part was that I didn’t ever love her, not really. I cared for her a great deal, but I stayed by her to help her and take care of her. I got my heart shredded and it wasn’t even filled with love for the woman at the time. Crazy, right?”