Oberon Boxed Set (Books 1-3) Welcome to Oberon

by P. G. Forte

  Marsha stopped smiling. “That really wasn’t funny.”

  “Oh, yes it was,” Lucy insisted, “Because then she had to wait an entire week before she could make her confession, and I swear she spent the whole time expecting to be run down by a truck, before she’d get the chance to wipe her slate clean.”

  “Like I said,” Marsha repeated. “Not funny.”

  “Don’t be such a prig, Marsha. You’d have thought she was Hamlet’s father the way she was carrying on. How does that line go, again? I wish I had Dan here, he’d know—” She broke off, when she realized Marsha had stopped listening.

  A look of alarm crossed Marsha’s face. She turned to Scout and grabbed her arm. “Scout. Quick!” Marsha pointed toward Kate. The girl’s face had gone dead white. Scout responded so quickly that Lucy could only marvel her reflexes. In an instant, it seemed, she was out of her seat and had Kate halfway to the back of the church.

  Lucy turned to Marsha for an explanation. “What the hell?”

  “It’s these goddamned hymns,” Marsha grumbled. “All this stuff about flesh is food and death and blood, and wounds, and gore... we should have realized it would be too much for a kid who’d just seen her first dead body yesterday.”

  “Oh shit.” Lucy felt all her maternal instincts kick in. “I should go back there with them.”

  “Lucy,” Marsha stopped her. “Leave them alone. Let them bond.”

  “Marsha, don’t be ridiculous. Bond? The girl looks like she’s about ready to puke her guts out. What kind of bonding is that? Anyway, I’ve known Kate all her life. What she needs right now is someone she’s comfortable with.”

  “What she needs is to learn to be comfortable with Scout. She’s going to be her stepmother in a couple of weeks, isn’t she? She can use the practice. Besides, it’s probably one of those karmic things. This was probably supposed to happen, just for this reason.”

  “You know, Marsha. There is such a thing as going too far with this mystical crap. Next you’ll be telling me the murder was supposed to happen, just so Scout and Kate could successfully bond with one another.”

  “Oh, no,” Marsha assured her, “I’m sure there’s a lot more to the story than that.”

  * * *

  “So, how’re you feeling now?” Scout asked Kate, a long while later. After they’d both finished throwing up. After the walls of the bathroom were no longer threatening to spin, and Kate’s face was no longer paper-white, and Scout no longer felt icy cold tremors jolting through her.

  Kate grimaced. “Better, kind of. I think. It was just so – I couldn’t stop thinking about how—”

  “Well, don’t start talking about it again,” Scout ordered, as she felt her stomach trying to turn over again. “I don’t want to throw up any more.”

  Kate giggled. “That was really gross. I didn’t think grown-ups could... you know.”

  “No. You didn’t think grown-ups could what?”

  You know... puke like that.”

  “Oh, yeah?” Scout couldn’t help smiling. “Well, I’ll let you in on a little secret. When it comes to puking, I don’t think you’re ever too old.”

  By the time she and Kate came out of the bathroom, the Mass had ended, and the vestibule was filled with people attempting to leave the church in peace. As they pushed their way through the crowd, Scout caught sight of Marsha and Lucy, just outside the doors, talking with Bob.

  “Oh, there’s Grandma,” Kate said pointing, and Scout turned to see Lillian, who was standing with Rose and a couple of other women, motioning for them to come join them. Wonderful, she thought as she headed their way. More fun.

  “Kate, how are you feeling?” Lillian asked, taking hold of Kate’s chin and turning her face up so she could look at her. “Lucy said you were sick?”

  Kate squirmed uncomfortably. “I’m okay, Grandma. I just...”

  “She started thinking about the body we found yesterday,” Scout finished for her. “I guess it was too much for her.”

  Lillian released Kate, and turned her gaze on Scout. “And you aren’t looking so good either.”

  “Yeah, Scout was sick, too.” Kate told her grandmother.

  “Oh, she was, huh?”

  “Delayed reaction for both of us, I guess,” Scout said with a shrug, unwilling to meet the older woman’s eyes. “I’m going to go see if Lucy is ready to leave yet.”

  “Not so fast,” Lillian said, laying a restraining hand on Scout’s arm. “How do you expect to handle being married to a policeman if you’re this squeamish?”

  Scout stared at her in surprise. “Well, I don’t exactly expect he’ll be bringing dead bodies home on a regular basis,” she blurted out without thinking. She cringed as Kate giggled.

  Lillian’s eyes blazed. “He’s not going to stop doing what he does just because you’re married, you know. You’re not going to change him. If this kind of thing is a problem for you, you need to decide that before you marry him.”

  Scout felt her temper begin to fray. She was not having this same argument all over again. Been there, done that. “I have no plans to change anybody, or anything,” she answered coolly. “I think Nick and I are both fine, just the way we are.”

  * * *

  “Like I keep trying to tell you, there’s no mystery about it,” Scout heard Bob say as she joined them on the steps. “Father Ferris had a family function to attend this morning, so he and I switched masses. You can read all the meaning into it you want, but that’s really all it was.”

  “Yeah, so you say,” Lucy answered, clearly unconvinced.

  “I bet that must have gone over well with your usual crowd,” Marsha said dryly.

  “Why do you say that?” Bob asked, his eyes absently scanning the crowds, clearly uncomfortable with the turn the conversation was taking.

  “Gimme a break, Bob. You know as well as I do what Ferris thinks of the charismatics. And vice versa.”

  “Now Marsha, that’s not very charitable. And besides—”

  “Besides that, he’s also boring as hell.”

  “That wasn’t what I was going to say,” Bob said, but his smile looked a little guilty, Scout thought.

  “No, but it’s still true.”

  “What I was going to say was that all things work for good, for those who love God.”

  Marsha grimaced. “Sure, that’s nice, Bob. But where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there is disorder and every foul practice. Little hard to see how that could work for good, isn’t it?”

  Bob smiled, clearly enjoying the exchange. “Ah, but with God anything is possible, isn’t it? Besides, the wrath of a man does not accomplish the righteousness of God.”

  “Maybe, Marsha shrugged, seeming suddenly to lose interest. “But all the same, you know, the Spirit scrutinizes everything, even the depths of God. So, what’re you gonna do?”

  “Pray for his happiness, I suppose.” Bob looked at her sadly for a moment, before turning to Lucy. “How are you these days, Lucy?”

  “My parents are in town,” Lucy informed him. Neither her voice nor her face gave any clues to how she was feeling, and Scout had to smile at the expression on Bob’s face.

  “Oh. Well, that’s nice.”

  “You think so?” Lucy asked dryly. She turned to Scout. “Are you about ready to go?”

  “Absolutely. Whenever you are.”

  “Great. Marsha, we’ll see you tomorrow morning.” Lucy grabbed Scout’s arm and they started down the steps of the church.

  “So, how’s your sister doing?” Scout heard Bob ask Marsha as they walked away.

  “I have six sisters, Bob. Which one are we talking about now?”

  Scout almost felt sorry for him.

  “Fine. Point taken. How’s Siobhan?” Bob asked again, more gently.

  Marsha sighed. “She’s doing okay, I guess, Bob. Why don’t you give her a call sometime?”

  “I don’t think she really wants to talk to me,” he said quietly. Marsha winced at the express
ion she glimpsed in his eyes, just before he turned away.

  And this, she reflected guiltily, was exactly why it was so important for her to learn to mind her own damn business. Involving herself in other people’s affairs was a no-win situation. Painful for her, and pretty much useless for everyone else. Too bad it seemed like such a hard lesson for her to learn.

  Back to Top

  * * * *

  Chapter Thirteen

  * * * *

  The argument on the porch had been going on for hours. Scout had retreated to Lucy’s big white kitchen along with Joey’s wife, Janice. She had just glanced at her watch again and was wondering how soon she could excuse herself and go home, when Dan bounded into the kitchen laden with several large bags of produce.

  “Good afternoon, ladies,” he began cheerfully, then stopped dead in his tracks as the sounds from the porch reached his ears. “Jesus, Mary and Joseph!” he exclaimed tiredly, his broad shoulders sagging just a little. He set the bags down on the counter and turned to Janice. “They’re at it again?”

  “Mmm-hmm,” Janice murmured as she poured more champagne and orange juice into her glass. “Don’t sound so surprised. What’d you expect?”

  “I don’t believe them. Have they even eaten?” He surveyed the desecrated platters that lay scattered on the counter with a frown.

  Janice shrugged. “What do you think? We finally told the kids to go ahead, and Scout and I have been picking.” She cocked her head on one side and looked up at him shrewdly. “I guess now that you’re here, we can stop worrying about Lucy getting pissed off at us for messing with her platters. You’ll cover for us, won’t you, Dan?”

  “Sure. My pleasure,” he said, smiling wryly. “Where are the kids anyway?”

  “The boys have gone to the park. Mandy got back from her birthday party not too long ago, then she and the other two girls went upstairs to listen to CDs.”

  “Well, that’s something, anyway. Maybe there’s hope yet for the next generation.” He came to stand between them and helped himself to a small piece of lox, popping it into his mouth with his fingers. So, uh... what set ‘em off this time?” he asked reluctantly, as though he really didn’t want to hear the answer.

  “Angela.” Janice pronounced the name with clear dislike.

  “Oh, yeah? Dan seemed at once surprised and relieved. “That’s different. Has someone actually heard from the witch…I mean, our lovely sister-in-law, then? Or are we just re-hashing former crimes today?”

  “No, and you had it right the first time. She called Joey last week.”

  “Ahh. So that explains it.” Dan’s tone held just a touch of malice, Scout thought, her ears perking up.

  Apparently Janice heard it, too. “Explains what?”

  “Why, the lousy mood he’s been in recently,” Dan answered, a little too innocently, his eyes focused on the scene on the porch, the merest hint of a smile on his lips.

  “Huh.” Janice seemed momentarily nonplused. “No, Dan. Not hardly.”

  Dan’s smile grew wider and his eyes twinkled as he looked at Janice with amusement. “Well, it’s obvious he’s not happy about something, Jan. I mean, why else would you guys’ve missed the party last night. And look at him out there now. You know,” he added, turning to Scout. “Joey’s normally the calm one in the family. Calm. Even-tempered. Friendly. But you’ll have noticed that, right? How friendly he is to you?”

  “Dan, you prick,” Janice muttered. “Why don’t you just stop talking for once?”

  Scout, who knew damn well why Joey was not being particularly friendly to her, felt herself blushing.

  Dan chuckled quietly to himself. “Janice, what is that foul concoction you’re drinking?” He grabbed the glass from her hand and took a sip. “Sad waste of good champagne,” he lamented with a shake of his head as he handed it back. “Better switch to coffee soon, darlin’, or you’ll never last the day.”

  He went to the refrigerator. “Can I get either of you ladies something else to drink? Soda? A beer? What’re you drinking Scout, iced tea? Yeah, I guess that sounds pretty good.”

  “Should we do something to stop them?” Scout asked Janice a little nervously, as the noise on the porch increased. It seemed everybody out there had a point to make. Loudly and immediately, and at great length.

  “Ha!” Dan snorted as he poured tea into a glass. “There’s an idea. Were we ever that innocent, Janice?”

  Janice ignored him and looked at Scout in mild surprise. “Well, like what, exactly?” she asked with interest.

  “I don’t know. Do they do this often?”

  The other woman shrugged. “Well, I guess so. What’s an Italian family get together without an argument? You’ll get used to it. If you stick around long enough, that is.”

  Scout ignored the implication of that and strove for a conversational tone as she asked. “So, did it take you long? To get used to it, I mean?”

  Janice raised one eyebrow. “My last name used to be Imperetore. How used to it do you think I had to get?”

  “Ah, quit your palavering.” Dan leaned back against the counter. “It’s not just Italians, you know. My family’s not any different. Except there’s six of us, and four of us boys, at that, so there’s usually a few punches that would have been thrown by now. And then, of course, we’d spend hours more maundering endlessly on about how sorry we all were about everything.”

  He looked at Scout and shook his head in mock sorrow. “You know, Scout, it may be too late for Janice and me, but you still have time to escape. You really sure you want to get involved with this bunch?”

  Before Scout could think of an appropriate response, Janice had rounded on Dan in disbelief. “Well now, isn’t that interesting, coming from you. Correct me if I’m wrong, Dan, but don’t you think Lucy might be just a tad upset if you managed to undermine the wedding she’s coordinating? Even if it did make you a hero with the rest of the family.”

  “Aww, and I always wanted to be a hero.” Dan smiled. “Keep your shirt on, Janice. Scout knows I’m only teasing her. Besides,” he added, his smile widening mischievously. “I can handle Lucy.”

  Janice snorted. “Handle her? Get real, Dan. Your wife has you just where she wants you, and we all know it.”

  “Is that a fact?” Dan’s eyes strayed back to the window and rested fondly on Lucy for a long moment before he turned back to Janice and wagged his eyebrows with smug amusement. “Well now, I suppose she does. And fairly often at that.”

  Janice shook her head disgustedly. “There’s a word for your condition, you know. And if I were just a little more vulgar, I’d use it. But since I’m not, I guess I’d better make us another pot of coffee. It looks like we’re in for a long afternoon.”

  “Ah, well. Look on the bright side,” Dan said, “And, no offense Scout, but it could be worse. At least Nick’s not here this time.”

  “Oh, wow, that’s true, isn’t it?” Janice nodded in agreement. “Good point, Dan. Maybe they’ll actually calm down before dinner, after all.”

  “What’s Nick got to do with it?” Scout asked warily. The other two turned to her in disbelief.

  “You’re kidding, right?” Janice asked her. “He’s got the worst temper of any of them.”

  “Worse even than Angela’s,” Dan said. “And that’s saying something.”

  “Oh, absolutely,” Janice agreed. “In fact, he’s the only one Angela ever backed down from.”

  Dan shrugged. “Well, and can you blame her?”

  “Nope.” Janice shook her head. She looked at Scout, and her face became perplexed. “You have to know about this, right? I mean, you two have been together a little while now, you must have seen him lose it by now?”

  Scout shook her head. “No, not really.”

  “Well, what about last night?”

  “Last night?” Scout couldn’t imagine what Janice was talking about. “What happened last night?”

  “The argument you and Nick had. After everyone went home
?”

  “Oh, that.” Scout shrugged. “That wasn’t really an argument, more of a misunderstanding. I can’t really say Nick lost it, though. I think I got more upset than he did, to tell you the truth.”

  She peered at the other woman curiously. “How did you hear about it?”

  Janice lifted one shoulder. “Lillian overheard you, I guess. She was probably hanging in the hall outside your door. All I know is, she must have been on the phone with her sister at the crack of dawn. Because when Joe showed up at our house this morning, at about ten minutes past daybreak, he already had it from Rose.”

  “Jesus.”

  “I know,” Dan agreed. “It’s frightening, isn’t it, the way they’re all up in each other’s business like that?”

  “So he’s really never blown up at you?” Janice persisted.

  “Nick?” Scout tried to picture Nick blowing up in anger, but she just couldn’t do it. “I can’t even imagine that happening.”

  “Amazing,” Janice breathed, shaking her own head. “Absolutely amazing.”

  “So what do you think, Jan?” Dan smiled at Scout as he spoke. “Think maybe Scout here could have a hidden talent as a lion tamer? I bet she’d do okay with a whip and a chair. Maybe you could have her give you a few lessons. You know, just in case it looks like Joey’s good temper is gone south for good.”

  “Oh, I don’t think so, Dan,” Janice said, smiling sweetly. “If I really want to keep Joey whipped, I think I’d be better off taking lessons from Lucy. Although I guess we’d be talking about using another type of feline altogether, wouldn’t we?”

  Dan howled with laughter. “Better watch out, Janice,” he warned when he recovered. “Gettin’ perilously close to vulgar there, aren’t you, darlin’?”

  “Yes, and it’s all your fault, Dan,” Janice answered with a gleam of amusement in her eyes. “You are an evil, evil man. I don’t know how Lucy stands it. Anyway, the coffee will be done in a few minutes. I’m gonna go check on the girls.”

  Dan turned to Scout after Janice had left the room. She was looking just a little pale, he thought, and all at once he felt contrite. “Hey,” he said softly. “You all right?”