Dating Dracula, Jr

by Minda Webber

  “I did. He was a formidable enemy and one I never took lightly. I can’t tell you how many coffins of mine he ruined over the course of the years. And I still bear a burn scar on my shoulder when he got me with Holy water. I believe we were both in Vienna at the time attending Carnival. Then, we weren’t enemies; in fact, we sometimes went out drinking together and discussed paranormal politics.”

  Debbs looked interested and her stance was now relaxed, even though she was frowning. “He went out drinking with you?”

  Dracula laughed. “Port, of course, not blood. Your ancestor loved a good glass of Port as well as I do.”

  She was staring at his shoulder as if she could see the burn scar beneath his black shirt. “My father has told me the story about Vienna and the Carnival. But you left something out. Ya’ll were both trying to win the affections of the same woman, Mina.”

  Dracula’s eyes crinkled at the corners as he burst into delighted laughter. “I had almost forgotten that we were. At that time both of us were terribly infatuated over the beautiful Mina. I got both the girl and the burn scar from the Holy water. But your ancestor didn’t go away empty-handed. He found my Renfield and took him away. The best butler I have ever had. Your great, great, great grandfather eventually forgave me Mina. But alas, I never forgot that he stole my butler. It ruined our friendship.”

  I saw a reluctant grin spread across Debb’s face as Dracula gestured towards the older blonde-headed vampire that had been at Debbs kidnapping. He was now leaning casually against the mantle of the fireplace. “Let me introduce you formally. Adrian Dracula, this is Debbs Van Helsing. Adrian has fought your family as well.”

  “I believe she knows him, grandfather, since he kidnapped her,” Dagan said dryly.

  “Not formally,” he chided. “Dagan, have you lost all sense of ceremony.” You have just passed the most difficult test a vampire of my line faces. You awoke alone and under attack. Yet, not only did you survive without serious injury, but you made some impressive allies who will aid you in your later life.” Dracula glanced over at Seth. “You are the Mummy’s son?”

  His words made me angry. We were all just chess pieces to him. Move them right, move them left. Kidnap one, kill another. I didn’t like him much, even if he did look like Johnny Cash, my grandmother’s favorite singer of all time.

  Seth nodded and finally managed to say, “Yes, Count Dracula. I am my Mummy’s son. Seti Arabus. It is an honor to meet one of your distinction.” I wanted to gag at Seth’s formal greeting. But Seth, if anything, was always polite. Just like his parents.

  He pointed next to Hart. “You are a Hyde of the famous Jekyll-Hydes?”

  Hart actually stepped forward and shook his hand. I caught Dagan smiling in spite of his anger. “Yeah. I mean, yes Sir, I am. Or yes, your Countship.”

  I heard several of the vampires snicker at my slow-talking, but wonderful friend. I glared at them.

  “I am pleased to meet such a brave young man. And you may call me Dracula,” the Count said, as he turned and glared at a few of the snickering offenders.

  Okay, maybe I liked Dagan’s grandfather a little better. Hart had fought so hard and so courageously. He didn’t deserve to be laughed at because he didn’t know proper monster etiquette. It’s not like his uncle would teach him anything but to shoot pistols and ride horses.

  “And you are an Usher,” Dracula said to Zoe, who nodded. “I had the pleasure of staying in your home long before it was moved to San Antonio.”

  “Wait until I tell my parents.” Zoe thought about what she said and shrugged. “At least I can tell my brother.”

  Dracula then turned his attention to Bea who was standing next to Zoe. “This is one of Ben Franklin’s ancestors. I always admired him, even though he was one of those pesky colonists at the time. I met him once in the House of Lords in London. He reminded me of Leonardo.” We all pretty much got that he was speaking of Da Vinci. “A true Renaissance man.”

  “Really?” Bea’s eyes were bright with suppressed excitement. “What did you talk about?”

  “Electricity, what else? And libraries. I am a great reader as well.”

  “That’s so sweet, and so weird,” Bea said happily. “I read that he had a great sense of humor.”

  Dracula laughed in delight. “He did. And may I say, Miss Franklin, that you look nothing like your ancestor Ben. Such a pretty girl. Those eyes and that neck.”

  Bea frowned while we all caught the joke and laughed. Even Dagan relaxed somewhat. He reached out and caught my hand in his own and turned to smile down at me. “You were great, V.J. When they captured me, I thought, this is it. I hated that I wouldn’t get to see you again. And then I was afraid that you would come and get killed.”

  I smiled, but in the back of my mind, I was a little annoyed that Dracula had forgotten about me. He had talked to all of the gang, but me and here I was his grandson’s girlfriend and a Frankenstein.

  “I have to admit, I don’t think I really thought our rescue would work. But I couldn’t just let it go and not try to rescue you from the jaws of death. Hey, our plan sort of worked.” If you overlooked the fact that we didn’t rescue Dagan, nor was he ever in any real danger here at Dracula’s house.

  I only thought Dracula had forgotten me. After a few more words to Zoe about her ancestral home, he turned to me and pinned me with that burning gaze as he crossed the room to us.

  “And this is Miss Victoria Frankenstein.” He presented me his hand. “I knew that you wouldn’t desert my grandson, but I expected your attack to be tomorrow night.” He smiled broadly at me. “How clever of you to come up with a ghoul for a bloodhound. I must remember that. It was a brilliant stratagem and one worthy of a Frankenstein.”

  I looked over at Dagan a little reluctantly, like I was putting my hand in a lion’s mouth, I gripped Dracula’s hand.

  He kissed the back of my hand and then stood tall, smiling. “You were very brave as well. You are more than worthy of your blood line, a fitting bride for my grandson.”

  I looked at him and almost crossed my eyes. What on earth was he talking about?

  He dropped that bombshell and started to walk away. “Grandfather, wait a minute,” Dagan called out. Dracula paused momentarily and Dagan hurried across the room to him so fast that he practically ran. “What was that about? What bride?”

  “Why, your bride of course.”

  “My bride?”

  “Your bride.”

  “Hey, I hate to mention this, but you guys are repeating yourselves. What bride?” I had crossed the room quickly as well. Of course, not as fast as Dagan, but I wasn’t a slowpoke about it either.

  Dracula looked at the two of us like we were a couple of eye-rolling idiots. “You might be married someday. It will be an arranged marriage between a noble monster house and our royal house. I am testing the candidates. Miss Victoria Frankenstein is one such candidate. And may I say, you passed with flying colors. I would be proud to let you enter our royal house as bride. Although, normally I’d try to find someone with royal vampire or wereanimal blood to marry my grandson. Except, you really were quite marvelous in helping my grandson stay safe. You were so adept that I’d be happy to call you granddaughter.”

  At least he said his remarks in a lowered voice. None of my gang had heard what he’d said, but the vampires were giving me frankly assessing looks. I felt like I should comb my hair or do something else, like maybe wipe the blood off my shirt.

  “See, what a lucky girl you will be if you marry into vampire royally. What a life awaits you.”

  Wow, what did one say to Count Dracula about being his granddaughter in an arranged marriage, when you weren’t even out of high school, or even had a thought about marriage in your head, without getting your throat ripped out, or insulting him enough that he wouldn’t let his grandson date you? I mean, I wasn’t ready to march down the old wedding aisle forever. But really, really wanted to keep dating Dagan. Yet marriage for me, was something in the dista
nt future, to be done after college and a few years of touring Europe and Australia, not something to be done any time soon. I was hard-pressed to find anything to say, so I just stood there gaping.

  “Grandfather,” Dagan said as he shook his head slightly. I must admit Dagan looked embarrassed since his pale features turned a light pink. “This isn’t something we should be discussing in front of everyone.”

  Dracula laughed. His laugh cut like glass. “You are always telling me I need to be more American by speaking my mind and not doing dastardly deeds behind the scenes. So I am trying to be up front. You can’t have it both ways. Either I remain silent and deadly, or let people know what I am plotting and be deadly.”

  Dagan opened his mouth to argue, but seemed to lose his train of thought. He looked at me and shrugged his shoulders. Either way, Dracula had just agreed to still be the same dangerous and deadly vampire he had always been, with the exception that he would now have me for a relative in the future. Maybe. I pursed my lips thoughtfully.

  Dracula patted me on the back. “See, my grandson is overcome with his good fortune that you might one day be his blushing Frankenstein bride.” He turned back to the room addressing vampires and the rest of us, mainly my gang. “You were all magnificent. You fought bravely, valiantly and with style. Your parents will be so proud.”

  He left the room, his black cape swirling behind him, and Debbs managed to ask the room in general the big question of the night.

  A frightening question. “

  “About what Count Dracula said,” she began, then stopped, a look of horror on her face. “What did he mean about talking to our parents?”

  Adrian smiled wickedly at her. “Why, Miss Van Helsing, he’s calling your parents to come and pick you up, since he seems to think that if we let you go off on your own, you’ll only get into more mischief.”

  I didn’t buy the excuse for one minute. I think this was our punishment for killing part of his army.

  “I’m a slain vampire slayer,” Debbs protested, shaking her head. “My mom is going to kill me for this! And just wait until my dad gets back home!” She hung her head and moaned, the perfect picture of a vampire-hunting drama queen.

  “I think I won’t be getting off restriction this week,” Seth added mournfully.

  “I’ll never get to hang with you guys again,” Zoe said sadly. “My life is over and I’m only a freshman!”

  “My stepmom will lock me in my room until graduation,” Bea remarked philosophically. “I guess I’ll get a lot of lab work done.”

  “Oh, this isn’t good, Dagan,” I said, as I clutched his hand. “He really won’t call, will he?”

  Dagan nodded his head miserably. “If he said he would, then he will. I’m sorry.”

  “I really should have told my dad and mom. They are going to be so peeved. I may be grounded for life.” I looked at him sadly, then, remembering what his grandfather had said about being a possible candidate for a bride, I blushed.

  Dagan seemed to follow where my thinking had led. “I didn’t know about any of this, V.J. I can’t believe he’s that old- fashioned. An arranged marriage is ridiculous!” He sounded disgusted. Okay, now my feelings were hurt.

  “I didn’t know being married to me would be such a hardship!”

  He looked taken back and started stammering. “I didn’t… I mean…I mean,” Dagan hesitated. “I didn’t mean it that way. It’s just there are so few arranged marriages in the twenty-first century and I don’t want one. Not that being married to you would be a hardship. I know you want to go to college and travel, and me too. I mean I love you and all, but I’m not ready for marriage. I haven’t adjusted to my undead state. Or not eating pizza anymore or hanging out on the beach, much less having a bride, even one as lovely as a Frankenstein Bride.”

  I rolled my eyes. “All right, I get it. I’m not ready for marriage either. In case you haven’t noticed, I’m not even out of high school yet. But you just sounded so disgusted with it all.”

  “I am, but not about you,” Dagan said as he leaned over and kissed my forehead tenderly. “Never you. How dare grandfather do what he did? To make me take a test to see if I’m worthy of his bloodline is a bunch of ancient crap! And he endangered all of you, but mostly you. I couldn’t have stood it if you had died protecting me from my family’s own vampire warriors.”

  “Well, I couldn’t have stood it either, if I had died. I’ve got too much to do,” I replied, teasing him since his words had put me in a better frame of mind. “If my parents ever let me have a life again.”

  Dagan patted me on the arm, commiserating with me. “I’ll go try to talk him out of it.”

  “Do you think there’s a slight chance that you might?”

  “No. He’s never changed his mind in over a thousand years.”

  “Well, one can always hope.” I let go of his hand as he turned to go. “The old fang-faced fart.”

  He started to laugh. “No one has ever called my grandfather an old fart.”

  “If the shoe fits,” I replied, as I watched Dagan hurry out of the room on a mission impossible. I had actually wanted to call his grandfather a whole lot worse. I would have, except for the fact that Dracula thought I’d make a good bride one day.

  I loved Dagan even though I didn’t know if it would last forever or not, right at this minute. I loved being his girlfriend and maybe we would get married. So, I didn’t want to jinx our relationship at this early date by getting off on Dracula’s wrong cowboy-booted foot. I’d keep quiet about the marriage stuff and his being a tattle-tale.

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  “How utterly wicked, how twisted, how abominable! But what else can you expect from the King of Vampires?” Debbs asked, her voice filled with annoyance and a tiny bit of dread. “How could he call our parents? It’s diabolical torture, I tell you.”

  “I know. The vampires are getting back at us for taking out some of them,” I replied unhappily. “My dad will never trust me again. My mom probably won’t speak to me for a month of Sundays or Saturdays, for all of that. Throw in the weekdays too.”

  Debbs smiled at my remark. “By making me smile you’re just as wicked as them. I want to pout and curse, so don’t make me laugh. My parents will roast me alive for this. I didn’t tell them we could have captured a Dracula. I’ll never live it down. My brothers will taunt me forever in regards to this stupid fiasco. I can never go to the family reunion again!”

  This was bad. The Van Helsings family reunions were great. They were always held in some elegant mausoleum with lots of wine, vampire stories, stakes and song. And her brothers would be merciless in their teasing. I remember when Debbs had just turned thirteen. We were concerned about kissing a boy. We never had and we wondered what it would feel like.

  Debbs had gotten this really big crush on Cameron Clark, a boy at school. Her brothers shook their heads and whispered that they had found out a great secret. It took Debbs two days to bribe her brothers into telling her Cameron’s secret. The liars told her that he was really a frog in disguise, and not human. They said that Cameron had been cursed by a witch.

  Debbs, of course, didn’t believe them. So they waited for Cameron to kiss Debbs. One day, with encouragement from her oldest brother, Cameron did just that. He kissed Debbs, both of them unaware that her brothers lurked nearby in the woods behind their house. As they kissed, her brothers dropped a bag over Debbs’ head and took Cameron away and hid him. They then put a frog in front of Debbs and told her that because she had kissed Cameron, he had turned back into a frog.

  Her brothers had laughed until they rolled on the ground. Later, Debbs found out the truth of their little jest and put mud pies in all their beds. Yep, I felt sorrier for Debbs than I did for myself. At least I had gotten a boyfriend out of this deal, while all she’d gotten was bites, bruises and the infinity-lecture coming from her parents, a lecture that would last until the end of time as far as the Van Helsings were concerned.

  “I’m sorr
y, Debbs. Looking back now, maybe we should have told our parents.”

  “You’re only saying that because they are being told tonight,” Bea said, as she joined us in our little talk by the front door.

  “No, I’m not really,” I replied. “At least I don’t think I am. I realized tonight that we would probably be hurt badly or killed and I wished I’d told my dad from the beginning. Maybe Debbs wouldn’t have gotten kidnapped and Dagan wouldn’t have gotten kidnapped, and none of us would be facing our parents disappointment and anger, not to mention punishment.”

  “Yes, ‘if only’ are the saddest words in the English language,” Bea added thoughtfully.

  “You don’t seem all that upset,” Debbs said as she studied Bea’s relaxed expression. “Your stepmom will hang you by your toes, lock you in your room and throw away the key.”

  “But think, Debbs, I never would have gotten to have such great adventures fighting off werewolves and vampires for liberty and justice, if ya’ll had told your parents right off the bat, no pun intended. I certainly wouldn’t have met Dracula.”

  I shook my head and smiled. Bea was actually serious. She was so thrilled to have been allowed in on our monster hunt that she didn’t care she would never see the light of day again once her stepmom got hold of her. “You’re crazy, Beatrice Franklin, as crazy as they come.” Yep, that was our little Miss Liberty.

  She grinned. IT was a grin from ear to ear. “But ya’ll love me anyway.”

  I started to tell them about my having passed the test to be Dracula’s Bride, but as I opened my mouth to speak, I decided that it might be better to wait until we were all in a better mood. Debbs would not take kindly to being overlooked as a possible Dracula Bride. Nor would she like to see me eventually married to the terminally fanged and pale. Instead, I made a remark on how well we did fending off the enemy tonight.

  Like the monster-fearless gang we are, we discussed the garlic bombs and the ghoul bloodhound until Seth came up and took Debbs’ hand, leading her away from us to talk. Probably about being grounded, missing the Halloween Dance and other important things.