Toxic

by Lingard, Alice

“What?”

  “It's a game where you—”

  “I know what it is.”

  “Let's play it then.”

  “Seriously? That's the best you can come up with? Noughts and crosses?”

  “Oh well, if you're scared of losing,” he said.

  “To you? Don't make me laugh. What are we playing for?”

  “If I win,” Todd said. “You can give me some oral delight.”

  “Is that like Angel Delight?”

  “You can be an angel or a devil. Don't care as long as I get me some oral delight.”

  “Classy.”

  “And if you win.” He laughed. “Like that's ever going to happen. What would you like me to do for you?”

  “Hmmm.” Suzy put a finger on her chin. “What would I like you to do for me?”

  “Some Big Todd action?”

  “If I win.” She ran a finger slowly across his chest. “If I win I'd like you to—”

  “Yes?”

  “Wash those pots.” She pointed to the sink full of dirty dishes.

  “It's your turn to wash up today,” he protested.

  “Not when I win your silly game.”

  “Right! Come on then. We'll soon see who the king of noughts and crosses is.”

  “Queen.”

  “In your dreams.”

  “Enough!” Suzy tossed the pencil across the table. I can't stand any more.”

  “You're just scared you'll lose.”

  “We've been playing for forty minutes, and so far we've tied every game.”

  “Does that mean you concede?”

  “No. It just means I'm bored of this stupid game.”

  “Okay, we'll play something else then.”

  “Must we?”

  “Or we could go to bed.”

  “Play what?”

  “Hangman.”

  “Are you kidding me?”

  “What's wrong with hangman?”

  “It's stupid?”

  “Why is it?”

  “Think about it. A man's life depends on you being able to guess a word. How can that be right?”

  “It's a game.”

  “Seems a pretty harsh punishment to me. Being hanged just for not being able to guess a word.”

  “It isn't real. It's just a game. It isn't even a real man. It's just a matchstick man.”

  “Or woman,” Suzy said.

  “It's never a woman.”

  “Why not? That's sexist.”

  “You're nuts. Are you going to play or not?”

  “Okay. But I think it's morally wrong.”

  “Your moral outrage is duly noted. Which version are we playing?”

  “There are different versions?” Suzy said.

  “When we were kids we sometimes allowed multiple guesses at the word. Other times we played it so that if you took a guess at the word and were wrong—you lost. Sudden death.”

  “Whatever. Sudden death sounds about right.”

  “So if you guess wrong you lose.” Todd said. “What's the subject?”

  “For what?”

  “The words you have to guess.”

  “I don't know. You choose.”

  “Okay.” Todd pondered for a few seconds. “Your favourite pastimes.”

  “That's stupid.”

  “You said I could choose.”

  “Okay. Favourite pastimes it is.”

  “I'll go first.” Todd drew eight dashes on the sheet of paper.

  _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

  “A,” Suzy said—pretending to yawn.

  “No.” Todd drew a horizontal line.

  “O” Suzy sighed.

  “No.” Todd drew a vertical line.

  “They aren't connected to one another. “Suzy pointed to the horizontal and vertical lines.

  “They are.”

  “No they're not. There's a gap between the bottom bit, and the side bit.”

  “Bottom bit and side bit? Are those the technical terms?”

  “All I'm saying is there's a gap. That piece would fall over.”

  “Fine.” Todd extended the horizontal line so it joined the vertical one. “Better?”

  “U,” she said.

  “No.” He drew a second horizontal line taking care to make sure this one joined the vertical line.

  “Are you sure this is a real word?”

  “Course I am.”

  “E.”

  “Yes.

  _ _ _ E_ _ _ _

  “I.”

  “Yes.”

  _ _ _ E_ I _ _

  Ten minutes later, and the gallows had been completed. Hanging from them was a stick man with a head, body, two arms, but only one leg.

  “S.”

  “Yes.”

  S _ _ E_ I N G

  “Want to guess?” Todd said.

  “I've no idea what the word is.”

  “One more leg and the man hangs.”

  “I know. Stop pressuring me.”

  “Any time you're ready.”

  “L,” Suzy said.

  “Loser!” Todd drew a second leg on the man. “I win.”

  “What's the word?”

  Todd filled in the missing letters.”

  “SCREWING?” Suzy shook her head. “I might have known.”

  “What's wrong with that?”

  “Favourite pastime? Is that the best you could do?”

  “I win.” Todd stood up and began to unfasten the belt on his jeans.

  “Whoa! What do you think you're doing?”

  “Claiming my prize. It's oral delight time.”

  “Not so fast. It's the best of three. I want a chance at setting the word.”

  “No one said anything about best of three.”

  “They are the rules. Take it or leave it.”

  “Whatever. It's only delaying the inevitable.” Todd put a hand on his crotch. “Big Todd can wait.”

  Suzy rolled her eyes, and then drew seven dashes on the paper.

  _ _ _ _ _ _ _

  Ten minutes later, the gallows had been drawn, and the man had a head, body and two arms,

  “F,” Todd said.

  F _ _ _ I N G

  “I've got it!” Todd shouted. “You lose!”

  “Do you want to guess?”

  “Yep.”

  “Are you sure? If you're wrong, I win.”

  “I've never been surer. Get ready to give Big Todd some oral delight.”

  “What's your guess?”

  “FUCKING.”

  “I win.” Suzy punched the air.

  “What? It's 'Fucking'.” He spelt it out, “F U C K I N G”

  “It's 'Fishing'.”

  “That's cheating. You don't go fishing.”

  “Me and Lacey often go fishing.”

  “You're a liar!”

  “I just love me some Big Trout.”

  “That's bollocks.”

  “So,” Suzy was the one smirking now. “Time for the decider.”

  “Give me that pencil.” Todd made a grab for it, but Suzy pulled her hand away.

  “Seeing as how it's the best of three, we should toss a coin to see who gets to pick the word in the final game.”

  “Get on with it then.”

  Suzy won the toss and drew more dashes on the paper.

  “I hope you can live with yourself,” Todd said, as he ran water into the bowl.

  “Just make sure you get all of the dishes clean, loser.”

  “You don't have to look so smug.”

  “Yeah, I do.”

  You could at least help to dry them.”

  “Forget it loser. You agreed the bet. You lost.”

  “You cheated.”

  “How did I cheat?”

  “First off, you don't go fishing. And who's ever heard of Oregano?”

  “Origami.”

  “Whatever.”

  “The traditional Japanese art of folding paper.”

  “Yeah. I bet you do that as often as you go fishing.”

 
; “Here.” Suzy held up the paper they had been using. She'd folded it into the shape of a bird. “Now do you believe me?”

  “What's that meant to be? A duck?”

  “It's a crane. Obviously.”

  “Well it looks like a duck.”

  “You're such a sore loser. Don't forget to wipe down the sink when you've done, loser.”

  Chapter 15

  “How come your hair isn't orange any more?” Todd asked.

  “Because the colour has all washed out. Why do you think?”

  “I like the colour you've got it now”

  “The colour I've got it now, as you put it, is my natural colour.

  “It suits you. Why do you dye it weird colours?”

  “Blonde seems so boring.”

  “I think you should leave it like that.”

  “Do you? Wait a moment while I check if I care what you think. Hmm. No. I don't care.”

  “What's wrong with you today? You've been crabby all morning.”

  “No I haven't,” she snapped.

  “I'd hate to see you when you are. You've been a right miserable cow, hasn't she Ben?”

  “Oh fuck off, Todd.”

  “Charming. Are you still mad about last night?”

  “I wasn't mad.”

  “It was only a word. A four letter word. I don't know why you went off like that.”

  “I don't want to do this again.”

  “Do what? Talk? Why are you so afraid to talk?”

  “There's nothing to talk about. Just forget it.”

  They sat in silence for the next fifteen minutes.

  “Why don't we go for a walk?” Todd said.

  “Nah, I'm not bothered.”

  “Suit yourself. Ben! Walk!”

  The dog had been sprawled out on the living room floor, but jumped to his feet at the word 'walk'. His tail went into overdrive.

  Todd grabbed Ben's ball which they'd bought from the village shop the previous week. “Are you sure you won't come?”

  “Nah. I've got a bit of a headache. You two go.”

  “See you later then. Come on, boy.”

  Suzy watched Todd and Ben walk along the beach towards the headland. They always went in that direction on their midday walk. When they were some distance away, she grabbed her bag and phone. Damn—it was flat. Todd's phone was on the bedside cabinet. He'd left it on charge overnight. She tossed it into her bag and headed out in the opposite direction, towards the village. If Todd looked back, he wouldn't see her because she was hidden by the house.

  Suzy used the land line in the village store to call for a cab.

  “Where to?” the cab driver said.

  “Leumoor.”

  “Anywhere in particular?”

  “The nearest bar.”

  “The Fisherman is popular. It's on the sea front. Will that do?”

  “Yeah. Anywhere that serves beer.”

  As they drove, Suzy kept checking Todd's phone to see if she had network coverage. Fifteen minutes into the journey, one bar appeared on screen. Moments later, she had a full strength signal.

  “Hello?” Lacey said.

  “Babes, it's me.”

  “Suzy!” Lacey screamed down the phone. “Where are you? Are you all right? Is Todd with you? Is he okay? Why aren't you using your own phone?”

  “Bloody hell, babes. Steady on. Too many questions.”

  “Are you okay?”

  “Yeah. Course I am. Are you? You sound kinda manic. Have you been snorting something?”

  “I've been worried crazy about you. It's been weeks. Why didn't you call? I thought you were dead.”

  “Don't be daft. I'm fine.”

  “What about Todd?”

  “He's fine too.”

  “Are you sure? Is he with you?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Can I talk to him?”

  “He's not here right now.”

  “Suzy, don't lie. It's important.”

  “I'm not lying. He's taken the dog for a walk.”

  “Dog? You've bought a dog?”

  “We didn't buy him. We found him. Well, I suppose he found us. His name's Ben—.”

  “Where are you?”

  “I can't tell you that. I promised Todd.”

  “Suzy, listen to me. He's in danger, and you might be too, if you're with him. There are some really nasty men who want to hurt him.”

  “I know. I've seen them.”

  “Where? When?”

  “Back in London. They came to the hotel. Three of them. One of them is called Goldie apparently.”

  “What happened?”

  “We dodged them. Look babes, we're both fine, honestly. You don't have to worry.”

  “Suzy. Please tell me where you are.”

  “Not yet. I'll talk to Todd. See what he says.”

  “But he's definitely okay?”

  “Yeah, defo. I just had to get away from him for a while. He was doing my head in. What is it with men? Why do they always have to spoil things?”

  “What's he done?”

  “Nothing. It doesn't matter. I'm being a bitch as per usual. Anyway, how's Rawhide? Are you still getting plenty?”

  “He's worried about Todd. Carol is too.”

  “Tell 'em to take a chill pill.”

  “Whose phone are you using?”

  “Todd's. Mine's dead. Anyway, there's no bloody signal where we're staying.”

  “Where's that?”

  “Leu—. Clever. You nearly had me there.”

  The cab came to a halt outside The Fisherman pub.

  “Sorry, babes. Gotta go.”

  “Suzy wait!”

  “Speak later. Loveya, babes.”

  “Beer, please.” Suzy said.

  “Which one?” The middle-aged man behind the bar pointed to the row of pumps.

  “Any.”

  “Half?”

  “Make it a pint.”

  The pub was deserted except for two men sitting in the far corner, playing dominoes.

  “It's lively in here,” she said.

  “Two pounds eighty, please.” The bartender ignored her remark.

  She took a seat at the table next to the window. What was she doing in this godforsaken place? Why didn't she cut out on Todd, and take a train home? There was nothing to stop her. She still had some of the cash he'd given her.

  God, she needed a drink even if the beer was bloody awful.

  What would Todd do when he got back and found her gone? He wouldn't care—why should he?

  She took a long drink.

  That wasn't true. He did care. That was the bloody problem. It had been okay at first—the two of them having a laugh. That's all she wanted—nothing serious.

  She finished her beer and went back to the bar. “Another pint of your best beer, landlord.”

  The man didn't try to hide his disapproving look as he poured another pint.

  The last few weeks had been fun. They hadn't needed TV or the Internet or phones. They hadn't even needed booze. But then Todd had gone and spoiled it all.

  She took another long drink.

  “Stupid bastard!” she said under her breath.

  “I'm sorry. I can't let you have any more.” The bartender pushed her money back to her.

  “Give me a pint,” Suzy slurred.

  “You've had enough.”

  “I've only had a couple.”

  “Five.”

  “Who's counting?”

  “I'll have to ask you to leave.”

  “What's up? Ain't my money good enough for you?” She tossed a five pound note at him.

  “Now, or I'll call the police.”

  “Nice. Very fucking nice. Well screw you, arse hole.”

  The fresh air hit her as soon as she stepped outside. For a moment, she thought she was going to be sick, but she managed to keep it down.

  “Taxi!” she shouted at an already stationary cab.

  The driver gave her a once-over as though unsure if
he wanted the fare. “Where to?”

  “Home.”

  “Want to give me a clue where that is?”

  “Tremain Sands. House on the beach.”

  “I'll take you to the village. You'll have to direct me from there.”

  “Okay, babes. Let's roll!”

  **********

  Ben came running towards the cab. Suzy fumbled with her cash, but eventually managed to pay the driver.

  “Hello boy!” She crouched down to greet the dog, but lost her balance, and ended up on her backside. Ben ran in circles around her.

  “You're drunk,” Todd said.

  “And you're an arse.”

  “Where have you been?”

  “Out.” She pulled herself to her feet.

  “You'd better lie down on the bed and sleep it off.”

  “Okay, babes. Why don't you come with me, and I can fuck your brains out? Whoops!” She put her hand over her mouth. “Sorry. I forgot. You don't like to fuck any more do you? You like to make love.”

  “Come on.” Todd put her arm around his neck, and half walked, half carried her inside. Her head had no sooner hit the pillow, than she was spark out.

  Chapter 16

  Carol was standing just inside the door of the restaurant.

  “Good evening, madam. Do you have a reservation?”

  “Yes,” she said. “For eight o'clock. Carol Westgrove.”

  The waiter checked his book. “Ah yes. A reservation for two?”

  “That's right. My—” She hesitated. What exactly was her relationship with Jason? She was damned if she knew. “My friend should be here any time now.”

  “Very good. Would you like to wait for your friend at the bar or shall I show you to your table.”

  “I'll wait for him at the table, thanks. Could I get a dry white wine?”

  Of course. Any preference?”

  “Whatever you recommend. Better make it a large one.”

  “Very good madam.”

  The table, which was at the far side of the dining area, didn't allow her a view of the entrance. She checked her watch; it wasn't quite eight o' clock. Why was she so nervous? It wasn't like this was their first date.

  “Thank you,” Carol said to the waiter when he brought her wine. She took a long drink. Dutch courage.