After several minutes, Shaun spoke first. “Thank you for not pressing charges against me.”
Jackson leaned back in his chair and cleared his throat. “I read your article. It was wonderful. Poignant. I felt like I was right there with you through the whole thing, and the last thing I would do is send you to jail after giving me such a beautiful piece of writing. It must have been hell to live through it.” He chuckled.
Shaun didn’t smile.
Eventually, Jackson’s smile fell as well. “Look, I called you in here because I’m going to sign off on the credits you need to successfully complete your internship, but you are no longer an employee at this magazine. I need to be able to trust my employees and clearly I can’t do that with you.” Jackson leaned forward on his desk, clasped his hands and let his eyes roam over her. “You look like death.”
Shaun took a deep, heaving breath and closed her eyes, which were still swollen from all of the hysterical crying she’d done all week. “So now that you have my completed article—which has been published in my name—you’re throwing me out? I did everything you asked of me, Jackson. I wrote the damn article, I hurt someone very deeply by doing it and I put my entire life in shambles. All for you… All for this godforsaken magazine.”
“You broke into my office.”
“Momentary lapse of good sense.”
“You’ve treated this opportunity like a complete joke. You honestly expect me to offer you a job now? You’re lucky you’re not in jail!” Jackson laughed heartily. “My magazine isn’t a joke. You’ll be lucky to ever work in this town again.”
“What the hell are you talking about?” She was honestly confused. Was she so heartbroken by Adam that she’d lost all ability to carry on a normal human conversation?
“You honestly don’t know?”
She stalled before crying out, “No!”
Jackson leaned back in his chair with gritted teeth. He reached into his desk and pulled out the latest issue of the magazine and, without a word, flipped to her article. Still shaking his head and chuckling madly, he slammed the issue down in the middle of his desk for Shaun to see.
Shaun felt like she could throw up when she saw the official spread of her very first published article. She hadn’t had the stomach to look at it until that very moment. There it was.
‘How to Land a Rock Star in Thirty Days’
Jackson jammed his chubby finger against the byline of the article, looking downright homicidal.
Shaun took in his face, wondering what the hell he was so angry about. He’d gotten his article, it had been published and was already being talked about by everyone. The issue was their best selling in almost five years. So why the hell was he so angry? She squinted at him in confusion.
When he continued to tap his finger angrily into the byline of her article her eyes fell down to the title and, just below it, where her name would surely sit—sealing her ultimate betrayal in print forever.
Her eyes widened at the sight.
Written by: Mickey Mouse
--
Across the breakfast table Katie looked up at Adam from under her eyelids where she’d been pretending to text on her phone, chewing absently on her bagel and cream cheese. She’d been secretly watching him for the better part of the morning and, for the most part, Adam hadn’t seemed in any hurry to acknowledge her existence the entire time she’d been sitting there. Her eyes fell to the magazine he’d been reading—he’d never been a magazine person—then back up to him. The sun shone so brightly through the window of the breakfast nook that she was unable to make out the blurred title of whatever article had him so riveted. The curiosity was becoming too much.
“Hey brother? Not to be rude or anything… but you’ve been reading the same article for the last, like, hour. Has all the sex, drugs, and rock ‘n’ roll finally rotted your brain completely? Do you need me to, like, read it to you?”
Adam could vaguely hear the sound of Katie’s voice droning on and on in the distance, but he couldn’t bring himself to listen past his wild mind. For a week he’d been preparing himself for the backlash, the questions, and the embarrassment that would surely come along with him falling in love with a woman who had been using him from day one. He’d been dreading it every second since the moment he’d found out that Shaun didn’t care about him, at all. That she’d been writing an article on him. When he’d finally summoned the courage to open the magazine to her article and saw that ‘Mickey Mouse’ had written a riveting piece about an unnamed rock star he’d been struck speechless. As his sister had so kindly pointed out, he’d been unable to look up from the pages since.
“Mickey fucking Mouse,” he whispered, shaking his head with a chuckle. “Wow.”
Katie’s stared wide eyed, truly becoming concerned for her brother’s mental health. With a shake of her head she took the bagel and orange juice she’d prepared for herself and slowly backed away.
“I’ll be in my room when you’re ready to join the rest of us here on planet Earth.” She turned the corner of the kitchen with a laugh. “Freak,” she mumbled softly.
Once she left the kitchen Adam finally slammed the magazine shut and covered his face with his hands. The cell phone in his pocket felt like a boulder weighing him down to his chair and he ached to snatch it out and call her. He needed to hash it out some more. The scene they’d had at police station was no longer doing enough to satiate him. She’d tried to explain herself, but at the time it was the last thing he’d wanted to hear.
As he flashed back on her tear stained face begging him for a moment, begging him to listen, he could remember how destroyed he’d felt. The sensation of having his heart ripped clear out had never been as poignant as it had been with Shaun that night and, at the time, he really hadn’t wanted to hear a word she’d had to say. He really hadn’t wanted to see her again for as long as he lived. Even Veronica, who’d slept with his father, hadn’t shredded Adam anywhere near this brutally. What Veronica had done seemed miniscule in comparison to the destruction Shaun had left in her wake.
It had been a week now and with every day that passed he felt like he needed to hear her voice more and more. He needed to look at her. To speak to her. To really hash it out and understand why she’d done what she’d done.
It was no longer easy for him to put the blame completely on her. Could he really blame her for using him when he’d been using her just as much? They had always been honest with one another about what the real end goal was. She’d been a little less honest, sure, but was he right to expect complete trust and honesty from a black woman who’d read all of the terrible things he’d said? Had she been right not to trust him? Had she been wrong to use him?
His mind raced as he thought about the night he’d met her. The first time he’d sat down and heard the sound of her voice and the things she’d had to say. The first time he’d ever put his hands on her. Smelled her hair, felt her body against his.
“We had an agreement didn’t we? You get your face in the paper and I get to wipe the tarnish off my name.”
He winced. Had he really said those words to her?
“I’m not asking you to forgive me, I’m not even asking you to like me. I’m just asking you to hold up your end of the bargain, and your end of the bargain isn’t to be the lady who hates my guts, it’s to be the lady who’s on my arm. We’re just two people doing business, and then cutting all ties when that business is done.”
He had to smile as he thought back to that night. What an idiot he’d been. Even then, Shaun had been barely able to walk in the heels she’d had on. She couldn’t name one photographer working in the industry when he’d asked her which was her favorite. How had he not seen it? Had he been so enamored with her, even then, that he was blind to the fact that she’d been taking him for a fool from the start?
What was real?
He’d asked himself that very question for over a week now. If Shaun really didn’t give a damn about him then why would she bother
to put a fake name in the byline of her article? One that she herself hadn’t even sent in? Celia had sent that article in.
And it wasn’t just any random fake name, but Mickey Mouse. A name so glaringly fake that it mocked the magazine altogether. If Shaun really didn’t care, surely she would have sent in the article with her name and his as well. It would have been so easy. The two of them had already been photographed all over town together. No one would have doubted her credibility for even a moment. She could have reveled in all of the press it would have been sure to garner her. A black woman getting one over on the white man who had insulted nearly every black woman in the country? She could have retired on that article. She would have had book deals. She would have been an icon. A national African-American hero. But she’d given that up. For him.
At that moment the truth hit Adam like a ton of bricks. They’d been using each other from the start… but he was the only one of the two who’d really come out on top. He had wiped that tarnish off his name, and then some. Not only had he regained all of the minority fans he’d been at risk of losing, but he’d gained even more than he’d had before. The new White Keys album was the best selling in the band’s history.
Shaun on the other hand, had lost absolutely everything.
He hated that his heart hurt for her, that it even had the capacity to feel anything for her, at all. But it did. He did.
Palming his cell phone out of his pocket, he stared down at the screen where his thumb lingered over her name.
He wanted more than anything to call her.
Just as he was about to hit ‘call’, the sound of Katie’s voice shook him out of his daze.
“Daddy!”
Adam jumped from his kitchen table and hurried into his living room where he was met with the sight of Katie swinging from their father’s arms, giggling happily. She’d always been a Daddy’s girl and, though they had their issues, Adam and his father always made it a point not to get her mixed up in their business. Katie wasn’t a dumb girl, however, so she understood that Adam and their father were having some problems. She just had no idea exactly what those problems were. If Adam had anything to do with it, she never would.
“What the hell are you doing here?” Adam demanded.
Katie and Patrick both shot their heads in Adam’s direction. Feeling a strange sense of loyalty to both her father and to Adam, Katie released Patrick reluctantly and shoved her hands in her back pockets. “Adam…be cool,” she whispered.
“Go upstairs,” Adam said to Katie, watching in surprise as she obeyed his order without argument, albeit reluctantly. She grumbled to herself as she climbed the stairs to her room, throwing them both a look as she went.
“What the hell are you doing in my house?” Adam demanded, again, once Katie was out of sight.
Patrick held his hands out in peace, never moving far from the open door. “Relax, son… I come in peace.” He took a deep breath and pushed back the open jacket of his expensive suit, shoving his hands in his pockets. “Look… I came here to apologize to you.”
Adam had to laugh. “About what? Fucking my girlfriend? Insulting Shaun? Being a shitty human being? Which one, Pop? Pick your favorite.”
“All of it, and more…” Patrick paused. “I haven’t been a great father to you, Adam, and I know that, but you and I need to find a way to work this out. If anything we need to work it out for Katie.”
Adam heard what his father was saying, but he wasn’t ready. When the urge to defend Shaun rolled to the edge of his tongue Adam was suddenly agitated. “I don’t have time for this right now. I’d appreciate it if you just got the hell out of my house.”
“Adam—“
“Just get the hell out, Pop. I’m serious.” He made his way to the door and held it open, motioning to the beautifully landscaped front yard of his home. “Let’s go,” he urged.
Patrick came up next to the open door, eye to eye with Adam. He watched his son with regret for several long moments before silently making his way out the door.
Adam slammed it closed behind him.
--
Celia ran to the door of her house, shrugging a robe over her naked body and frowning deeply at whoever was banging so incessantly on her door so early in the morning. When she threw it open and caught sight of her friend, the anger on her face rapidly dissipated. Shaun looked like she hadn’t slept in months. Her curls were a wet mop hanging down on her head, dripping random dollops of water onto the wrinkled white blouse she had on. Clearly this was the first effort Shaun had made to get out of bed in quite a while, an effort that had clearly failed completely.
“Oh friend,” Celia whispered.
Shaun held up the issue of Cosmopolitan that she’d swiped from Jackson during their meeting that morning. “Mickey Mouse?”
Celia tried to fight a smirk on her face, then shrugged.
Shaun’s voice rose. “Mickey fucking Mouse, Celia?!”
The smile finally broke on Celia’s face.
“This isn’t funny!”
“Well what else was I supposed to do, Shaun? I couldn’t let you throw your life away by not sending in that article. I couldn’t. But I also didn’t have the heart to screw up your relationship with that idiot Adam, either so… This seemed like the best solution. I’m just glad that nobody noticed that change before the issue went to print!”
Shaun faltered, trying to remind herself of how angry she was at the woman standing in front of her. The small role she’d played in the shit-show Shaun’s life had become. Why was it so hard for her to stay mad at Celia? “And you couldn’t have let me know that you did this BEFOREHAND?”
“You were ignoring my calls!”
“He hates me now, Celia. He never wants to see me again. This wasn’t your business to solve. It was mine, and for the record, it didn’t work! I don’t have a job and I don’t have Adam. My life is completely fucked up.”
Celia immediately reached for Shaun, taking a chunk of her wrinkled blouse and pulling her into the house. “I knew you would be angry, and you have every right to be, but… I’m a huge part of the reason you’re in this mess and I knew that I had to get you out of it.”
“I really thought that you sent in the article with my name behind my back… I was…” Shaun sputtered. “I was never going to forgive you.”
“Well if you had answered any of my calls or texts in the last week I would have told you everything myself.” Celia led Shaun into her living room and sat her down. “I really am sorry. I’ve been a horrible friend and have led you down a terrible path in all this. I had to fix it. This was the only thing that would work.” Celia’s head fell. “But I guess I fucked that up, too. I’m so sorry.”
Shaun faltered. It was the first time Celia had ever so openly admitted to any wrong doing. Her heart softened. “Well… there is one bright side. Jackson is going to give me the credit for the internship so… I’m officially a UCLA graduate.”
Tears shot to Celia’s eyes. “Oh… Thank you god.”
Shaun nodded softly.
Celia reached out and took her shoulders. “Shaun that’s great!”
“And Adam told me he loved me.”
“What?” Celia cried, a smile breaking through the tears.
“Yeah.” Shaun nodded. “He told me he loved me, you know… Past tense....”
Celia’s smile slowly fell.
“Yep…Right before he told me that he never wanted to see me, again. He hates me.” She sniffled.
“How did he even find out? Did you tell him?”
“He must have seen the article open on my laptop when I got arrested.”
Celia’s eyes nearly bulged out of her skull. “You got arrested?”
Shaun waved a hand. “It doesn’t matter. Jackson isn’t pressing charges.”
Celia’s mind raced, trying to make sense of what Shaun was saying.
Shaun continued on, oblivious to her friend’s confusion. “I don’t know what else I could have expected. He was goin
g to hate me no matter what. There was never going to be another end to this story…” Shaun’s face began to slowly collapse in sadness. “I just never thought it would hurt so much.”
Celia immediately opened her arms and cradled Shaun’s head in her chest, jamming her eyes shut. “Oh, Shaun. I know, I’m so sorry. But you know what?” Celia tightened her arms around her friend. “We’re going to get him back. Okay? No more tears because we’re going to fuckin’ get him back, okay?”
Shaun had to laugh. “He said he never wanted to see me again.”
“The man is in love with you, Shaun. He was emotional. He was speaking out of emotion. Of course he wants to see you again.”
“I hurt him so bad. You didn’t see him. You didn’t see the look on his face. The least I can do is respect his wishes, and he told me point blank that he never wants to see me again, so…”
“But Shaun.”
Shaun sniffled softly. “Just promise me one thing.”
“Anything.”
“Stop helping. Okay?” When Shaun saw the reluctance on Celia’s face she pressed. “Promise me that.”
“Okay. I promise.”
Celia held her friend for hours, struggling to hold back tears herself, until they both fell into a slow slumber on the couch.
Fifteen
Janelle stood from the park bench where she’d been pounding away on her iPad and greeted Adam with two quick kisses on each cheek. Taking in his signature skinny jeans and white t-shirt, she grinned knowingly. “You look great!”
Adam looked down at his outfit with his arms out, his Ray Bans hiding the one eyebrow that had jumped skeptically up on his face. “Jeans and a t-shirt,” he said, sarcastically.
“Learn to accept a compliment asshole.” Janelle shot back. It all actuality, this really was the best Adam had looked to her all month. At least he appeared to have showered and thrown his clothes in the laundry before he decided to step out in public. Shaun had all but disappeared from his life and his vocabulary and, though Janelle still had no idea why, she could see the poignant effect that Shaun’s absence had upon Adam.
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