Alive! Not Dead!

by R. M. Smith

  She kept staring in our direction. She grunted a few more times. A few short pieces of poop dropped onto the floor. When she finished, she wiped with the palm of her ungloved hand. Then she wiped her hand on the floor.

  Standing up, she came right over to Mindy and I. “You two don’t look like stiffs to me.” she whispered. “You look alive! You look pretty damn clean, too.”

  I didn’t want to say anything. I thought that no matter what I would say or offer to this girl, it would not be enough to please her. She was hardcore. She had killed many, I was sure.

  “What you say, white boy?” she asked as she put the cold tip of her machete under my chin. Her breath was rotten. “You wanna play?”

  I changed my gaze, looked directly at her.

  “Ah, so, we are alive.” She put the blade to Mindy’s chin. “What about you, girlfriend? You living?”

  Mindy nodded.

  “Well now…” she took the machete away. She looked us both over. She saw my wrapped wrist. “You needed something for the pain, eh?”

  I nodded.

  “Skin can show you pain, love,” she said to me smiling her rotten orange smile again. “Skin knows pain.”

  I didn’t want to ask any stupid questions like who is Skin. Or can we go now? I thought silence was best at the moment.

  She looked at Mindy again. “My” she whispered, “you are a pretty one. I like your hair. I tried to dye mine, but it ain’t never gonna look as good as yours.”

  “What the hell you doing in there Mits? Pinch it off and get out here!” Gordo yelled from out in the hall.

  “Bitch I ain’t done yet!” Mits yelled back. “Can’t a nigger shit in peace?”

  “Careful you don’t shit yourself out,” Cab laughed.

  “Shut up, retard!”

  She put her machete under my chin again. She whispered, “I see here Mister that you gots yourself a situation. Let me let you in on a little secret: the man Skin is looking for a woman. He’s had his eye on your little pretty here for a few days. He wants her.”

  Mindy said quietly “I’m taken.”

  Mits quickly zipped her machete back under Mindy’s chin in a millisecond. She said “You are taken by who we tell you are taken by, girlfriend. You got that straight?”

  I said quickly “Whatever Skin is giving you, I can double it.”

  She looked at me out of the corner of her eye, a smile forming. “I doubt it,” she said. “I like eating pussy. You don’t got a pussy. Your girlfriend do, but its Skin’s now.”

  “You can have mine if you let us go,” Mindy said.

  Mits raised an eyebrow. She scratched her chin with the hand she had just wiped with. “That’s an interesting thought.”

  Mindy whispered “You walk back out of here like nothing happened. Go with the men. Come back later tonight and we’ll be here, and you can have me.”

  Mits was looking down at Mindy’s crotch the whole time Mindy was talking. Mits licked her lips. She said “I need assurance that you’ll be here.”

  “You have my word.”

  “Not good enough, hon.” Mits looked at me. “He’s my insurance.” She looked back at Mindy. “Go hide back in the corner. I will be back tonight with your man.”

  “No! Wait!”

  “A promise is a promise – a deal is a deal. Take it or leave it right fucking now.”

  I nodded to Mindy, telling her that it was ok.

  “Ok,” she whispered. She slid around the corner.

  “Gordo! I found the man!”

  Gordo and Cab came crashing into the room. They aimed their weapons at me.

  Gordo asked “Where’s the girl?”

  Mits said quickly “He said a stiff got her last night.”

  “He’s fucking lying,” Gordo hollered. “She’s gotta be here! I swear I seen em both come in here!”

  “You musta been seein things, Gordo,” Mits said. “It’s only the man.”

  Cab said strongly “Skin will get to the bottom of this – he always does.”

  “You’re right,” Gordo said. “Let’s take him to Skin.”

  I looked at Mits who was smiling to herself as she stepped over a dead man. She walked out the door of the pharmacy.

  Cab grabbed me roughly by the arm. He pushed me in front of him. Gordo followed.

  As soon as I was out the door and past Mits, she stepped between Cab and I. She pressed herself against Cab. “Why you talking shit on me in there, retard?”

  “I was just fuckin with ya…”

  As quickly as she moved her machete from my chin to Mindy’s, Mits quickly and savagely cut Cab’s throat. He didn’t know what had hit him. He stood there for a second, blinking, and then fell forward as blood gushed out of his ripped jugular vein.

  I stepped back, shocked.

  Gordo was shocked, too. Before he knew it, the arm he was using to hold his machine gun was cut off at the elbow. As soon as it was cut off, his throat was cut as well. He fell down next to Cab.

  Mits didn’t even blink. She looked at me. She sighed. “I’m glad to be rid of those two psychos.”

  I was speechless.

  “Skin’s had me running all over town lookin for you folks. I’m tired of being his little fucking gopher bitch.”

  I said “So you were acting in there?”

  She smiled her rotten smile. “Kind of….”

  “So what was the truth?”

  “I like eatin pussy.”

  I hollered back to Mindy. “We’re ok now, Mindy. You can come out.”

  She came out of the darkness, stepping over the dead, questions on her face. She saw Gordo and Cab on the floor, pools of blood around their heads. She inhaled sharply.

  “It’s ok, hon,” Mits said. “They won’t trouble you no more.”

  “She killed them,” I said. “She was just acting.”

  With a stifled laugh Mindy said, “Well you’re a good actor, that’s for sure.”

  Mits said “I want your pussy now.”

  Mindy looked at me, more questions on her face. “I thought this was all an act…”

  “Not all of it, girlfriend,” Mits said.

  “You’re not going to set us free, then?” Mindy asked.

  “If you let me eat you out, I will.”

  Mindy bit her bottom lip. “Here? In the middle of all these dead people.”

  “Well where you want me to do it?”

  “We’ve been staying in a hotel down the road…” Mindy said.

  “I know. The Sleep Inn.”

  “How much do you know about us?” I asked her.

  “I know you come from downtown a couple ’a weeks ago. Skin seen you two and right away he was like ‘I need to fuck that bitch; she’s fine. I wanna make her mine,’” she said with a tune in her voice. “So he had me and these two goofy bastards here following you, waiting for the right moment to get ya.”

  “Who is this Skin guy?” I asked.

  “He’s our leader. He thinks he’s gonna rule the world now that it’s all over. He wants to be the new king or new lord or some shit.”

  “Why do they call him Skin?” Mindy asked.

  She took her glove off. All of the skin on her palm was ripped away. Her palm was scabbed over. She said “He asks for our skin as a sign of belonging. I wear this glove to keep the dirt out. It stings. Everybody calls me Mits cause I wear this glove.”

  “But you really don’t want to belong there, do you, Mits?” Mindy asked her.

  “No. I mean, some of the people are ok and I got a girlfriend there named Lana. We get along real good, but I don’t like Skin and I hated these two fucks.” She kicked Cab.

  I thought about asking her why she was worried about infections or dirt getting into her open sore on her hand when a few minutes ago she had wiped her ass with her other hand, but I didn’t. Instead I was trying to think of an exit strategy.

  “So the only way you’re going to let us out of here is if I let you eat my girl out?” I asked.

&
nbsp; She nodded, smiling.

  “You’ll kill us if she doesn’t let you?” I asked.

  “Motherfucker, you seen what I can do with my knife. Don’t test me no more about it.”

  Mindy said “Not here, though. Back at the hotel.”

  Mits motioned for us to go out the door. We went outside. There was an old Chevy 4x4 with a lift kit and another motorcycle parked next to mine. “The truck was Gordo’s,” Mits said. “Cab didn’t know how to drive because he was such a RETARD!” she hollered back at the door. “The bike’s mine.”

  “Follow us to the hotel then,” I said as Mindy and I got on our bike. Mindy stuffed our shopping bag deep into the sleeping bag rolled up on the back of our bike.

  “No funny stuff,” Mits said. “I’ll be right behind you and I can reach you easily with my knife.”

  “No problem.”

  Weaving through the parking lot full of jammed cars, we went south back to the highway.

  I didn’t know what to do. I was honestly perplexed. This rotten little black girl would only let us leave if she could eat Mindy’s pussy? It made me sick to my stomach.

  Back at the hotel, we went up to the room we had been staying in.

  “Ok leave,” Mits told me. “Go down in the lobby and take some of that medication Mindy stuck in your sleeping bag. It’ll do you some good.”

  I looked at Mindy. Her face showed no emotion.

  “Can’t we talk this over?” I asked, still trying to think of anything to do or say.

  Mits pointed her machete at me. It still had some of the blood on it from the other two men. “We’re done talking,” she said. “You’re lucky you’re not a stiff now, so leave us be. A deal is a deal.”

  Mindy nodded to me, signaling that it was ok for me to leave. She lowered her head, humiliated.

  Shutting the door, I went downstairs.

  Mits locked the door behind me.

  In the sleeping bag I pulled out the Rose Medical shopping bag. I dry swallowed two of the Tylenol 3 pills.

  I started nervously pacing around the lobby, trying to think of anything to do to help Mindy.

  About twenty minutes later, Mindy came down into the lobby. She sat down on a couch. She had her clothes on. Her face still showed no emotion. I asked her if she was ok.

  She nodded.

  I asked “Where’s Mits?”

  “She’s dead.”

  “Dead? How did she die?”

  “I suffocated her. She is in our room. Please get her out of there. Put her outside in the parking lot. I’m going to go wash.”

  She stood up and went back upstairs.

  While Mindy was in the bathroom, I dragged Mits’ lifeless body out of our room, down the steps, and out the front door of the hotel. I propped her against a car in the parking lot. When I was done, I went back upstairs and waited on the bed until Mindy was done.

  We decided that we needed to move somewhere, and fast. We didn’t know how long it would be before someone in Skin’s clan would find Mits.

  We decided that we needed to get out of Denver.

  “Should we go back north? We might cross paths with Mason?” I asked

  “I don’t know.”

  “I think it might be best if we try to meet up with them. There would be four of us then instead of two.”

  “Ok.”

  After bagging up our supplies, we headed north.

  Mindy didn’t say much the next day. She seemed very distant to me. I mean, she hugged me, but she wasn’t receptive to my advances before we went to sleep that first night; she just rolled over.

  I understood though. It was almost as if Mindy had been raped.

  She didn’t talk at all about what Mits did to her, and I didn’t ask. I felt that if she wanted to tell me about it, she would.

  It was getting a lot colder, too.

  Two days before Halloween, we made camp just south of Sheridan, Wyoming.

  I had to get a campfire going. It was just getting too cold. I could see my breath as I worked the kindling into a fire. Mindy sat behind me on a log, her arms crossed.

  When the fire was finally going good enough, I slid back and sat beside her. I put my arm around her. “You ok?” I asked.

  She didn’t say anything.

  “Mindy, are you alright?” I asked, looking at her.

  “You didn’t protect me, Dan.”

  “What? I didn’t protect you?”

  “No. You gave in to Mits. It was almost like you didn’t care if she wanted to do what she did to me.”

  “Oh I cared,” I said. “Don’t say I didn’t care, Mindy.”

  “But you didn’t do anything to stop her.”

  “At the hospital I was going to sacrifice myself so you could get out of there without any trouble...”

  “And then I would have been alone.”

  “Well what did you want me to do, Mindy? Try and fight her and her machete? She would have chopped me up like she did to Cab and the other guy.”

  “Gordo.”

  “Yeah him.” I slid away from her and stirred the fire.

  “I was so scared Dan…she told me to take my pants off and lay on the bed...and you were gone…you left without even trying to talk her out of it.”

  “She was the one with the weapon.”

  “We could have fought her off in the hotel…”

  “I didn’t want to take a chance of you getting hurt.”

  Mindy was crying. “You said you would take care of me.”

  “I do take care of you, Mindy!”

  “I felt so alone…” She had her face in her hands, crying.

  “It’s over now,” I said as I sat back on the log next to her. “Mits is dead. She’s gone.”

  “I killed her. I killed someone…”

  “You had to.”

  She put her head on my chest crying. She said “I can’t believe…that you were afraid of…a little black girl…”

  That stung. It hurt. I tried to hold my anger back. I said slowly “She had a machete.”

  Mindy looked up at me, a tear running down her cheek. “I killed her with my legs and you couldn’t even lift a finger against her.”

  “She had a god-damn knife,” I said, standing up. “She slit those guys’ throats like they were nothing. She could have killed us in an instant if she wanted to.”

  “She could have killed me after you left the room like a coward.”

  “Oh my fucking god,” I said, walking around the campfire. “So now it’s my fault?”

  “You said you would always protect me, Dan!”

  “Well I’m sorry. When a knife is at my throat, I guess I turn into a puss.”

  “Well then maybe she should have eaten you out.”

  She stood up and stormed into our tent.

  “My god…” I whispered. “Jesus…”

  I paced around the fire for a few minutes then went into the tent. Mindy was already in the sleeping bag. She was facing away from me.

  I said “I’m sorry.”

  Mindy said “I think we should have driven away when Mits was following us on the motorcycles. I think we could have outrun her.”

  I didn’t say anything.

  “We could have fought her in the hotel room. You didn’t have to give in so easily.”

  “I’m sorry,” I said. “I felt like we were backed up against a wall. I didn’t think we could have done anything without either one of us getting hurt.”

  “I just can’t believe you gave in so fast,” Mindy said. “It was so easy for her.”

  I sat down next to her on the sleeping bag. “I don’t know, I guess I was just thinking that she would leave us alone after – well, after she did what she wanted to do.”

  “And you were ok with it?” Mindy asked, turning toward me.

  “Not at all. I hated it. I didn’t want her – or anyone else – to touch you. You are mine.”

  Mindy said “This really has hurt me, Dan; in more ways than one.”

  Ag
ain I told her that I was sorry.

  “She made me get naked in front of her,” Mindy said, her voice hitching. “She held the machete to my throat, then told me to lay down on the bed. She told me to spread my legs. As soon as she lay down between my legs, she put the machete on the side of the bed. I took the chance and squeezed her head real hard. She tried to fight, but I held her real tight. Her face was smothering against my…pussy. I held her there for a long time. After a while she stopped struggling.”

  I put my hand on her side as she talked.

  “I felt so violated, Dan. Here I was being raped by a little girl, and my man was cowering down the steps. You could have broken into the room and shoved her off of me. You could have tried to get the knife away from her when we were in the hotel. But you did nothing and it hurts me. Its hurts me bad.”

  I held my hand on her. I still didn’t say anything. What could I say? I’m not saying she was right, but she was making sense. I mean, Mits was a young kid. I think Mindy and I could have overtaken her, but at what cost? An arm? A severed head? A deep cut that neither one of us could have stopped bleeding? I didn’t think there was a course of action that we could have taken differently.

  Mits told us that she’d let us go if she could have her way with Mindy – but then again, who was to say if Mit’s promise was real or not?

  Finally I said “I don’t think we had a choice, Mindy.”

  She sat up on an elbow. “No, I didn’t have a choice. But you did!”

  “Mindy you’re not being fair…”

  “Being fair? Ok how about this: how about some dude was threatening us. And how about he said that the only way we would be set free, would be if he could suck your cock? Would you let him?”

  “No.”

  “Would you fight him over it?”

  I thought about it a second. I said “If it were to ensure our safety, I would let him do it.”

  “Oh you’re just saying that…”

  I leaned toward her. “No. If it meant keeping you safe or giving you a chance to break free so you could get away and live, then yeah, I would let him. Just like I was going to give myself over to Mits at the hospital, remember? I was willingly giving myself to those guys so you had a chance to get away. I never expected you to stay there and wait for Mits and me to return later. When they started taking me away, I knew for sure that they were going to kill me. They were going to put me up on a stand in front of Skin and he was going to murder me right in front of everyone.”