by Lyn Denison
“Oh, Ashley,” she murmured and turned her face into the pillow.
Kate spent a restless night and woke up tired and heavy eyed. Her first thoughts were of Ashley. She lay in bed and sighed and then sat bolt upright. What if Ashley came over to visit her as Jennifer had said she intended to do? It was Sunday, and Ashley would know that Kate wasn’t at work.
In a fit of agitation Kate pulled on a pair of shorts and a loose T-shirt and climbed into her car. In no time at all she was on the road out of town and heading toward the Burdekin River.
If she’d accepted Rosemary’s invitation to go with her this weekend, none of this would have happened. She wouldn’t have met Ashley’s daughter, and she wouldn’t have seen Ashley. And she wouldn’t have dreamed those disturbingly unsatisfying dreams about her.
With resolution Kate tightened her grip on the steering wheel and increased her speed. She would pick a spot on the riverbank and relax.
Kate drove back into the Towers late in the afternoon, and although she was physically tired she felt more in command of herself. She’d driven out to the bridge, parked with all the picnickers, and sat beneath a shady tree to eat the fruit she’d brought with her. The air was heavy with heat and the sounds of people enjoying the Sunday afternoon.
After lunch she’d stayed under her tree watching a family play an energetic game of cricket. Eventually she’d picked up and finished the book she was reading, and then she’d opened the Leigh Mossman book, Gold Fever.
She read the first chapter and could see why the book had become a best-seller. Kate had to acknowledge that it certainly held her interest. In fact, she had been sorry she had to put the book down to drive home. She decided she’d continue reading it after dinner.
With a much more calm and positive feeling she turned into the driveway of home only to brake suddenly as she saw the figure sitting on her front steps. With the engine idling, Kate could only stare as the woman stood up, the setting sun burnishing her short golden hair.
CHAPTER FOUR
Ashley walked down the worn, wooden stairs and across the short distance to the car. “Hello, Kate,” she said with a tentative smile.
Her eyes were narrowed against the glare from the setting sun, so Kate couldn’t read the expression in them. She simply sat there and looked at Ashley, her gaze drawn to the strained, hesitant smile on Ashley’s lips.
Kate swallowed and found her voice. “I, I’ll just put the car away.” With a crunch of gears she steered the car into the carport.
Taking a deep breath she picked up her bag and climbed out of the car, carefully shutting the door behind her. To Kate, every action she took seemed delayed, a half beat behind her thought processes. She paused to gather her composure before walking back to where Ashley stood waiting for her.
“Have you been here long?” she asked Ashley stiltedly, cringing inwardly at her inanity. “I mean, have you been waiting long?”
A flicker of an indiscernible emotion crossed Ashley’s face. “Waiting long? Ages,” she said, looking directly into Kate’s eyes, and then she smiled crookedly. “No, not long really. I’d just decided you’d gone out to dinner, and I was about to go home.”
“Oh.” Kate shifted her bag from one hand to the other, realizing her palms were damp.
Her glance went to Ashley and quickly away again in case Ashley saw her looking. She didn’t dare allow herself the luxury of letting her eyes linger on Ashley’s familiar face, her so familiar body. If she did she might lose what little composure she had.
Although how she would react if she did relinquish her self-control she couldn’t imagine. Kate liked to think she’d coolly demand of Ashley why she thought she could simply turn up and Kate would accept her return without rancor.
Kate could almost laugh at herself. Cool and composed? She was far from that, and she suspected she hadn’t the savoir faire to carry it off.
Yet her fleeting glance seemed to take in every inch of Ashley’s attractiveness. If she closed her eyes, Kate knew she would be able to see Ashley in minute detail.
Physically, Ashley was about five-four, three or four inches shorter than Kate, and where Kate was lean to the point of androgyny, Ashley’s body was well defined and so obviously feminine. Her eyes were still that clear, arresting blue, and the light freckles Kate loved still dusted the bridge of her nose. Her hair, worn short now, sat back over the sides of her head, the front falling naturally across her forehead.
Ashley wore a pair of tailored navy-blue shorts and a plain white T-shirt that accentuated the rounded swell of her breasts, the curve of her hips. Ashley looked cool and fresh, and Kate, in her own far-from-new shorts and shirt, crumpled from her day at the river, felt gauche and unsophisticated.
“Can I come in?” Ashley motioned toward the house, and Kate hesitated.
All her instincts shrieked inside her demanding that she refuse, that she not allow this woman, this so achingly familiar, so beautiful woman, anywhere near her. But deep inside her a small voice rose above the screaming misgivings.
“Sure,” Kate heard herself say, and she turned on rubbery legs to lead the way up the steps.
As she fumbled with the key, Kate’s mind played over the sight of the other woman. Of Ashley now. She hadn’t changed that much really. Her figure had always been curved in the right places, her hips rounded, her waist narrow. And Kate could still remember the delight she’d always felt as she ran her lips over Ashley’s full breasts.
An arrow of desire spiraled downward to blossom between her legs and Kate’s mouth went dry. And she was only partially reassured by the knowledge that Ashley couldn’t see her face.
Hurriedly Kate stepped through the lattice gateway and across the wide veranda to unlock the solid front door. She led the way into the living room and turned as Ashley stepped inside.
“Would you like some coffee? Tea?” Kate asked politely, but Ashley shook her head.
She pushed her hair back from her forehead in a gesture that Kate remembered so well. Ashley always did that when she was nervous or ill at ease. Well, Kate could understand how Ashley felt. She was more than a little discomfited herself. Her insides felt like butterflies were square dancing in there.
Did Ashley remember the last time they’d seen each other? That awful scene seemed to Kate to sit heavily between them as they stood in the living room, the width of the carpet square separating them.
And suddenly Kate was back those ten long years, and they were together in Ashley’s bedroom in the large sprawling house on the other side of the back fence.
The room was small and painted pale pink, and the single bed still had the lace canopy that Ashley thought was kids’ stuff but couldn’t bring herself to remove. Kate and Ashley had spent hours together in that room as they grew up, playing, talking, doing homework. And since that electrifying moment after Belinda’s wedding, when they’d occasionally had the house to themselves, they’d spent the time in Ashley’s narrow bed making love. Of course, they’d had to be careful and they always were.
That day Ashley’s father and brothers were still at work, and Ashley’s mother and Kate’s aunt were at a meeting that always kept them until late.
Kate sighed and ran her fingertip over Ashley’s breasts, feeling the film of perspiration that still coated Ashley’s skin in the aftermath of their lovemaking.
“That was fantastic. Do you realize it’s been a whole week since we’ve been able to get together? I’ve wanted to kiss every inch of you so much I thought I’d die in history lesson this afternoon.” Kate lowered her lips to gently tease Ashley’s nipple, and Ashley murmured deep in her throat.
“Would have been better than whatever invasion we were supposed to be reading about, don’t you think?” Ashley laughed. “Wish we had time to start all over again.” She moved impossibly closer to Kate.
Their bodies were molded in familiar togetherness, and they kissed lingeringly.
“I love you,” Ashley said softly.
Kate nibbled her way along Ashley’s chin and snuggled into the curve of Ashley’s neck. “Kate?”
“Mmm.” Kate closed her eyes and drew in the intoxicating scent of Ashley’s hair.
“Kate? We should talk about —” She paused. “I want to talk about Dean and the football club dance,” Ashley began, and Kate lifted her head to look at her.
“That was ages ago. I’m sorry I was so, well, angry about it all. I admit I was really upset when you went with him, and I had the very worst time watching you together, but I think I understand why you did. I mean, I guess we do have to pretend we, well, you know. Anyway, you haven’t been out with him since.” She looked across at the frown on Ashley’s face. “Have you?”
“No.” Ashley said slowly. “No, of course not. Not since the dance. I…I would have told you.”
When Ashley told Kate she was attending the football club dance with Dean, they had had a dreadful argument that had continued at the dance. It had ended in Ashley turning on her heel and marching off, leaving Kate hurt and confused.
They’d avoided each other at school for the next week, and Kate had spent a miserable Saturday night alone, imagining Dean Andrews dancing with Ashley, holding her close to his broad chest, a gleam of triumph in his eyes.
And then late on Sunday afternoon Ashley had telephoned Kate to say she was alone and could she see Kate. Kate had rushed over, and a pale and tired Ashley had been waiting for her. Ashley had clutched Kate fiercely to her, sobbing an apology into Kate’s neck.
They’d ended up in Ashley’s bedroom, holding each other close. It seemed to Kate that Ashley couldn’t bear to let her go, and that had been fine with Kate. When Kate had begun caressing her, Ashley had stopped her, telling Kate she just wanted to be held. That was also fine with Kate. She’d simply held Ashley in her arms, breathing in her sweetness.
Now, weeks later, this was the first time Ashley had spoken of Dean Andrews.
“Well, if you haven’t been out with him, that’s all right then,” Kate said with mock seriousness. And I haven’t been out with Phillip either.” Kate groaned. “The last time I went with him to the movies it was awful. When he tried to kiss me good night and stuck his tongue in my mouth, I was almost sick.”
“Kate, there’s something I want to talk to you about.” The tone in Ashley’s voice made Kate still. “I can’t talk about it to Mum, and I’m scared.”
“Scared? Ash, what about? If you’re worried about anyone finding out about us —”
“No, it’s not that. God, I wish it was.” Ashley ran a hand over her eyes. “I’m scared you’ll hate me when I tell you.”
“I could never hate you, Ashley,” Kate said sincerely. “I love you. You know that.”
“Oh, Kate.” Ashley clasped Kate to her. “Let’s run away together. Now.”
Kate laughed softly. “Wish we could. But it’s only another couple of months. After Christmas we’ll be able to go down to Brisbane to university. We can share a flat and be together all the time like we planned.”
“Kate, what if —” Ashley stopped and bit her lip.
“What if what? What if we don’t get scholarships to university? We will. But if no we’ll just go down south and get jobs. We’ll be fine. You’ll see.”
Ashley was holding Kate so tightly she had to ease some space between them to take a breath.
“I need air, Ash.” Kate made a show of deep breathing. “So, does this mean you love me to death?” she asked lightly.
Ashley sighed. “I love you more than you know.”
“And I love you, too,” Kate said and kissed Ashley’s soft, eager mouth before ruefully drawing back. “I guess we should be getting dressed. What’s the time?”
Ashley glanced over Kate’s head at her bedside clock. “We’ve got a little longer.”
“Great,” Kate murmured appreciatively. “You feel divine.” She ran her hand down the indentation of Ashley’s spine and over the curve of her buttocks and pulled Ashley against her again.
Ashley’s leg slipped between hers, and a spark of desire burst into flame in Kate’s center. She arched her body against Ashley’s, her lips finding Ashley’s, and they kissed with renewed passion.
“What —? Oh, my God!”
Neither of them had heard the footsteps in the carpeted hallway or heard Ashley’s mother open the bedroom door. They both turned, startled, to look toward the voice.
Patsy Maclean clung to the doorknob with one hand, while the other hand clutched at her throat in horror. “Oh, my God!” she repeated. “What are —? What — ?”
Kate’s muscles had turned to jelly, and she was unable to move. She continued to hold Ashley to her as they both stared at the older woman.
Ashley was the first to rouse. She grabbed at the bedsheet, pulling it over their naked bodies.
“Mum, I can explain,” she began, and her mother drew a rasping breath.
“Get dressed, both of you, and then come into the kitchen.” She closed the door with a subdued click that seemed to explode into the small space.
Kate turned back to Ashley. “What can we do?” she whispered, feeling hysteria rise inside her.
“I don’t know,” Ashley said thickly. “I don’t— Oh, God, Kate! What can we do?”
Kate fought to calm her still pounding heart. She drew a deep breath. “We’ll have to tell the truth, I guess. That we love each other. What else can we do?”
“Mum won’t understand. No one will,” Ashley cried. “What if she tells Dad? And your aunt?”
Kate’s mouth went dry. This couldn’t be happening.
Then Ashley seemed to pull herself together. “We’d better get dressed,” she said flatly and pushed Kate toward the edge of the bed.
Kate sat up and shakily swung her legs to the floor. She stumbled as she reached for her clothes and Ashley grasped her arm, steadying her.
“They’ll have to understand, Kate. Won’t they?” she asked desperately as they reached for their clothes.
Ashley was all fingers as she struggled to fasten her bra. Kate stopped to help her, turning Ashley back to face her.
“Oh, Kate. What a mess.” Ashley’s voice caught on a sob.
“Shh.” Kate kissed her tenderly. “Just remember that whatever happens, I love you,” she said earnestly. Ashley nodded.
They finished dressing, and Kate took Ashley’s hand and squeezed it before they left the room and walked the short distance to the kitchen.
Patsy Maclean didn’t look at them when they entered the room. She had made herself a cup of tea and sat at the table, the floral china cup clutched in both hands. Kate could see she was shaking, could hear the rattle of the cup in the saucer.
Kate started to speak, but Ashley put a gentle hand on her arm.
“Mum, look, this isn’t what you think,” she began, and her mother turned a strained face to look at her.
“It isn’t? Then I don’t know what it is.”
Kate glanced at Ashley, at the drawn paleness of her face, and she straightened her backbone, lifting her chin. “Mrs. Maclean, we…Ashley and I…we love each other,” she said levelly.
Patsy Maclean angrily stood up, spilling her tea, her chair tipping over backward. Kate felt Ashley jump beside her at the noise, and Kate had to make herself hold her ground when she wanted to run.
“Love?” Ashley’s mother bit out. “You don’t know what you’re talking about. That’s not love. Not normal love. No daughter of mine is —” She shook her head. “I can’t even say that word.” She turned to Ashley, and Ashley seemed to shrink. “How could you do this, Ashley?”
“Mrs. Maclean —” Kate began again, and Patsy turned on her with a glare of dislike.
“Don’t talk to me, Kate Ballantyne. I knew I shouldn’t have let you get so friendly with my daughter. I knew there was bad blood in your family. Everyone knows about the Ballantynes, their lying, thieving ways. I should have gone with my better judgment, but I felt sorry for you, orphaned, alone in that co
ld house with Jane Ballantyne. But no. I welcomed you into my home, treated you just like my own daughter, and this is how you choose to repay me.”
“Mum, please,” Ashley pleaded. “We didn’t choose to fall in love. It just happened.”
“In love!” Patsy almost spat. “Stop saying that.” She folded her arms and paced across the kitchen and back again. “You don’t fall in love with a girl. You find a nice young man like I did, like your sister did. Well, I know what’s to be done.” Patsy took a steadying breath and turned, picking up the chair. “If you can’t find a nice boy then one will be found for you. Both of you.”
“I don’t want a nice boy, Mum,” Ashley said quietly. “And neither does Kate.”
“I don’t want to discuss this anymore, Ashley. I have to start dinner. And Kate, I think it would be best if you went home. I’ll be talking to your aunt.”
Kate stood fixed to the spot, not knowing what to do.
“And that Phillip Walker, the one who’s always hanging around you,” Patsy continued. “It’s time you encouraged his interest.”
“I’m not … I don’t like Phillip Walker,” Kate said softly.
“I don’t think that matters right now.” Patsy Maclean took the dishcloth and mopped up her spilled tea.
“Mrs. Maclean,” Kate began, her vocal cords stiff. “I know all this has been, is, something of a shock to you, but I’d prefer it if you didn’t speak to my aunt. I should do that myself.”
Ashley’s mother gave her a withering look. “I don’t think what you prefer should be taken into consideration. What I do know is the fact that Ashley is my responsibility. You’re Jane Ballantyne’s, and she’ll have to deal with you in her own way. But one thing’s for sure, you two won’t be seeing each other for some time.”
“Mum, please,” Ashley appealed.
“That’s enough, Ashley,” her mother snapped. “I don’t want to hear any more about it.”
“It won’t change the way Ashley and I feel about each other,” Kate put in quietly, and Patsy’s mouth thinned.
