See Me

by Michelle Lee

  Mags brought the still steaming tea over to her and plopped an ice cube in it, so she didn’t burn her mouth. She felt like one of those helicopter parents just hovering around, but Airy wasn’t her kid. She just wanted to anticipate any of the needs she had. She felt so bad for her right now.

  She was beautiful, even in her misery. She was pale right now, washed out looking like she’d been running on empty too long. Dark circles rimmed her bloodshot eyes, and they were swollen from crying. Despite all that, she exuded strength and a sense of love that just made you feel like she was happy to be in your presence. It was a surreal feeling. Something not of this world.

  Mags saw Airiella finish her tea and noticed that she had ate all her food. This was a good sign. She smiled softly at her, hoping she wouldn’t push her out the door yet. Mags got up and sat down at the table next to her. “Feeling better?”

  Airy moved her lips in a semblance of a smile and nodded. “Thank you. You kind of saved me there.” Her voice still raw sounding, but better.

  “Are you sick?” Mags gestured at her throat.

  “No, it happens as a byproduct of trying to rid myself of a certain type of energy. So, Winnie huh? She communicated somehow?” Airy changed the subject.

  “I have to say; my heart was racing when I realized someone from the other side was actually talking to us. It was my first time being a part of that. I was half excited, half scared out of my mind,” Mags said, a tremor of excitement running through her voice. “Though I am really glad that I was there and could now be here to help. I thought Ronnie was going to bust straight through the door to get out here when he realized the message was about you.”

  Airy blushed. “I’m glad it was you, I would have been so embarrassed for Smitty or Ronnie to see me like this.” She shook her head. “Actually, I am embarrassed for anyone to see me like this. It’s what I call my aftershock period. I’m calm during intense situations, and then once I’m alone, the adrenaline, fear or whatever hits me. I think everything that happened over the past couple of weeks has just caught up to me. Maybe, I don’t know.”

  Mags stayed silent, getting the feel she wasn’t done, and started clearing the table off to put the dishes out in the hall for room service to pick back up. She also started making another cup of tea for Airy. “Well if you need to talk, I am at your disposal,” Mags decided to lead with as she walked back to Airy with the cup of tea.

  “I’m awful about opening up to others,” she started, “it’s something I’ve been working on, but there are so few that I trust, that working on it becomes hard. I have to be selective about what I open up to others with because I don’t trust them with some areas. It’s exhausting. My usual MO is just to deal with things in my own way. This,” she pointed at Mags, “is something that wouldn’t have happened at home. I probably wouldn’t have even answered my door.”

  “I can understand that, and I know that words are cheap, but I can assure you that I am trustworthy. The only time I would ever betray a trust is if I thought your life was in danger, and even then, I would try to find a way to help without breaking that. As a female, I’ve had my trust broken by too many people and often find myself in the same boat as you. It wasn’t until Aedan that I started letting people in. At first it was only him, now, slowly, the other guys I let in too,” Mags admitted.

  “I already figured out that you were trustworthy,” Airy smiled, “or I don’t think Winnie would have sent you. I’ll give you a brief rundown of my day minus certain aspects of it that I haven’t come to terms with myself.”

  Mags nodded, it sounded fair. And she sat there and listened to the astonishing tale that this girl had lived just in this day. But when she finished with her day, she told Mags about her life, what brought her here, how she met Winnie, her reactions to the guys. Mags was stunned silent. She cleared her throat and said the first thing that came to her mind, “Sex is a great stress reliever.”

  Airy burst out laughing and the sight of the joy on her face settled on Mags like a blanket of softness. She grinned, “Mags, did you just proposition me?”

  Startled at the question, Mags blinked her eyes, “Well no, but now that you mention it my fantasy has always been to be with a woman and my husband at the same time.” She thought about it and then added, “But I think the penetration would have to be with me only, I don’t share well.”

  Airy’s clear happy laugh filled the room again and Mags couldn’t help but smile too. “I’ve never been with a woman myself, but if I were to try, I’d pick you, you’re gorgeous,” Airy said.

  Now Mags blushed and tried to turn the argument around, “Have you seen you?”

  Airy replied, “Every day I see me. But let me tell you what I see when I look at you. Confidence, strength, compassion, bravery and love. What you look like on the outside doesn’t matter to me. What I can see shining from your eyes and your soul is what matters most. Your outsides happen to match what I see within you. You are tall, willowy with that runners frame. Your blonde hair is amazing with the magenta ends on it. Your eyes are a deep brown that see way more than you admit. Your ass, it’s just perfect,” Airy said with a smirk.

  With that, Mags just fell head over heels in love with Airiella. Tears sprung up in her eyes and she tried to laugh them off and smartly replied, “Well your boobs are perfect, so we’re even.” They both doubled over in laughter howling until their stomachs hurt.

  Airy dragged herself back over to the bed. “I’m wrecked. I’m sorry, I need to sleep,” she apologized.

  “No need to apologize, after the day you had, I’d be comatose on the floor,” Mags told her. “Need anything else or should I just go?”

  Airy blushed again, “Would you mind staying? I just don’t want to be alone right now,” she said shyly.

  “Oh sweets, of course I’ll stay. I’ll text Aedan and tell him I’ll be here for the night,” Mags pulled out her phone and started typing a text.

  “I’m going to stay the night here with her tonight,” Mags wrote.

  “Everything okay?” Aedan responded. “Ronnie is driving me crazy.”

  “She said she didn’t want to be alone, she’s had quite the day. By the way, my fantasy? She might be the one.”

  “I don’t know what to say to that.”

  “You’ll get it when you meet her,” Mags replied mysteriously.

  “Is that what you are staying for tonight? Because I just got excited.”

  “No. She genuinely just needs someone to be here.”

  “If you need anything shoot me a text. We all can help.”

  “I know. I love you.”

  “Love you Babe,” Aedan sent.

  “All set,” she told Airy. “I’ll lay down on the couch here. Just let me know if you need anything.”

  “Please, no. Up here with me. Though I do need to warn you, since my energy dump earlier, my skin is really irritated for some reason and I need to pull my nightshirt off. If that makes you uncomfortable, I’ll deal with it,” she said looking down at her hands. “I promise, I’m not coming on to you.”

  Mags laughed. “I’m fine with nudity. Are you sure you want me that close?”

  Airy nodded, “I’m just feeling raw. My walls are down, my skin feels weird, I have zero energy, I can’t process any of these thoughts. Sleeping between Ronnie and Smitty last night was the best night of sleep I have had in years. I could really use that. If any of this makes you uncomfortable you can send them in.”

  “I’m honored that you asked me Airy, just relax,” Mags said, pulling off her jeans and climbing in the bed. Airy smiled weakly at her and pulled off her night shirt and rolled onto her side. “I’m going to touch you, just a forewarning. When I feel like that, I find human touch soothes me.”

  Airy nodded her head, then looked back over her shoulder, “I haven’t forgotten about your fantasy, and I’m intrigued enough to want to help you. But just not tonight, I’d like to have enough energy to enjoy it.”

  Mags sucked a brea
th in, “Deal. Let me give you a goodnight kiss.” Mags leaned over and brushed her lips lightly over Airy’s and groaned at the spark that happened from the contact.

  “Same thing happened with skin to skin contact with Smitty and Ronnie,” she told Mags. “Not sure what it means. Winnie said it’s a bond. Guess we are bonded now too,” her voice getting sleepier. “Goodnight.”

  Just like that she was out. Mags looked at the bruises all over her back and gently stroked her skin, feeling the tingle that ripped through her body at the contact. She kept up the stroking until Airy’s breathing got deep and even, and then she wrapped her arm around her and spooned her. A feeling of contentment washing over her and carrying her off to sleep too.

  Since earlier in the day Ronnie had been feeling out of place, jittery and had a variety of emotions roll through him. He didn’t make the connection until Smitty said something similar was happening to him and he remembered the feeling they had when they touched. He was feeling her emotions to a degree, where he felt something was off, but he didn’t know how bad it was.

  After Mags left, he tried tapping in to it, but it almost felt like the connection wasn’t complete yet. He didn’t know a whole lot about this stuff, but his mind was racing trying to think of everything that could have gone wrong. He’d been itching for Mags to come back so he could grill her and then go see her.

  When Aedan said Mags was staying the night, he got more worried. He kept looking at Smitty to see if he was on the same train of thought. Smitty finally said, “Stop staring at me. Yes, I’m worried, but if Mags needed help, she would ask. Or Aedan would have freaked out.”

  Ronnie nodded, knowing it was true, but it didn’t stop him from worrying. It wasn’t until he had gotten a text from Dave, one of the producers that he freaked out a little bit. “That girl is the real deal,” it said. “It made the news. She got through three tests today. Offsite tomorrow.”

  Ronnie showed the text to Smitty and they turned the TV on looking for a local news show and watched as the breaking news talked about a child abduction gone wrong and the tourist who saved the day. The shots only showed Airiella being interviewed by the police, but she was covered in dirt and blood with a medic tending to her arm.

  “What the fuck?” hissed Smitty.

  “No shit, she’s covered in blood. What kind of testing did they do? Who is that with her, Asher?” Ronnie growled reaching for his phone.

  “Yep, but you know he won’t reveal anything,” Smitty argued pulling the phone out of his hand. “Save it for a face to face so you can get a feel for something.”

  Ronnie acknowledged that with a flick of his hand and went to stare out the window at the night. He was trying to work out if he’d be able to go on the tests tomorrow, however he knew it would be pointless to ask. The offsite ones Dr. Stone wasn’t even allowed to go on. The tribes were secretive. Maybe instead he would spend the day grilling the others. He’d think of something.

  “Let’s grab the other guys and go eat something,” Ronnie said, needing to move.

  Chapter Fourteen

  I woke up with a hand on my boob and was confused until I looked over my shoulder and saw Mags. My aftershock came rushing back to me and I winced knowing I had told a stranger all my secrets. Well, almost all of them. The angel thing I kept under wraps. Noting that the sensation wasn’t unpleasant I left her hand there and just enjoyed the comfort for a moment.

  I knew today was going to suck just as much as yesterday, and I wanted to get more food in me. I didn’t feel like my energy was fully restored yet. I gently pulled away trying not to wake Mags and touched my lips as I remember she kissed me. Hmm, was I brave enough to experiment with a female? I had to figure I was considering it, as I had asked her to stay.

  I shrugged and got dressed and checked the wound on my arm as I got ready for the day. Whatever poultice Taklishim had used was a miracle, it had scabbed up already, but it still hurt bad. I scrawled out a quick note for Mags thanking her for her help and staying last night and left it next to her jeans, so she’d see it. I grabbed my purse and snuck out.

  As I was pulling my door closed, I head a throat clear behind me and I jumped. Ronnie and Smitty were standing there leaning against the wall waiting for me apparently. Smitty gently took my chin in his hand and looked at my face, noting a few bruises, while Ronnie took my arm and checked it over. Thank God my clothes were covering the rest of the bruises or this would take all day.

  “I’m fine,” I told them, “but I’m starving.” Smitty pulled me into a hug, tight, but not painful and it felt so good that I forgot about food. I melted into his body.

  “We saw you on the news,” he said into my hair, then pulled back and looked right into my eyes where I promptly drowned. Then he kissed me, his lips soft against mine and that connection flared to life and burned through me fast. I groaned and opened to give his tongue permission and I swear my bones melted. He tasted like cinnamon. Too soon he pulled away, his breathing ragged and his eyes dark with need. I wanted to drag him to the floor and continue.

  He had stepped back and suddenly my vision was filled with Ronnie. “Angel,” he moaned and crushed his mouth to mine. Where Smitty had been soft, Ronnie was hard, and the connection burned even hotter and I tried to mold myself to him to absorb more. He ground himself against me and I suddenly hated clothes. Ronnie’s tongue sweeping my mouth insistently. He tasted like raspberry.

  These two were going to undo me right here in the hallway, and then he was gone, and I felt dazed. That was definitely a good way to start the morning. I touched my swollen lips and ran my tongue over them, tasting both cinnamon and raspberry. Jeez, it was hot in the hallway.

  Knowing I couldn’t pull it off, but I did it anyway, I smiled wickedly at the both and sashayed past them to hit the elevator button. In my lust filled eyes, I completely missed and stabbed the wall instead. That was how well I pulled off that move. I heard Smitty laugh behind me.

  “Baby girl, we will join you in a moment, as soon as our pants un-tent,” he joked.

  There was no way I could keep my eyes forward after that. I turned around, and sure enough, both stood there, unashamed with their pants sporting a good size tent. I flushed but couldn’t stop that smile that came on my face. Totally worth it. Whoever I was around these men and Mags was someone I wasn’t familiar with.

  I hopped in the elevator before I could do something stupid and managed to stab the buttons to take me to the lobby so I could get food in the hope that I survived today better than I had yesterday. I walked into the dining room and immediately lost my grin and man candy high.

  Jax felt her walk in. He didn’t even have to turn around to know it was whoever they had called to interview. He felt it. Every cell in his body was drawn to her. She called to him in a way he had never felt before and the darkness in him revolted. He was going to look like an idiot if he didn’t move. He continued down the line, pretending he didn’t notice her presence. Every step he took that brought him farther away from her felt like he was killing all that was good in life while at the same time the farther he got the more the darkness eased. His body was at war with itself. His limbs started shaking as anger in him shifted.

  Unable to fight off the urge anymore he turned to face her. Instantly, the darkness swallowed him whole, the plate dropping to the ground, food flying, glass shattering, and her. She was fucking glowing. This bright light that the darkness hated. It despised her. Jax fought hard for control, he couldn’t cause a scene here, there were too many people, and he didn’t want to hurt her. Himself as a person that is, the darkness in him wanted to rip her to pieces and then burn them to a crisp.

  Inch by excruciating inch he fought his way back and stalked over to her, the darkness boiling under the surface of his skin, driving him mad. “You will never beat it, best me, or tempt me with your seductive body,” he growled at her. “Prepare for war.”

  She looked at him with wide eyes and looked insulted. Then reached out to his face a
nd he instinctively recoiled, fear gripping him tight, an odd sensation flicking over his skin. She moved with him though, her fingers tracing a path down his cheek. At her touch something flared to life within him and the darkness receded enough for him to regain full control. He stared at her in amazement as he took in her shocked expression, he knew she felt it too.

  “What the fuck just happened?” he whispered dramatically.

  She dragged her finger down his cheek more and slipped it under his chin, stood on her toes and said breathlessly in his ear, “If I was trying to seduce you honey, you’d know. I walk my talk.” And she walked away, turning after a couple of feet, “Oh, and tell that shit in you, it was nice meeting it.”

  He saw her trembling, so he knew it was partially an act, but still. The combo of her and that darkness in him was dangerous, and how she overcame it with a touch was beyond his comprehension. He was terrified as he walked fast out of that room, flying past Smitty and Ronnie without even seeing them. Shit just got real.

  I was shaking. I picked up the large pieces of broken plate off the floor as someone from the kitchen crew came running out to clean up the mess. That was one hell of an introduction. I grabbed a plate and mindlessly loaded food on it, not even paying attention to what I grabbed and sat down.

  I jumped at the sound of a voice behind me and saw it was Smitty, concern etched on his face. “Um, everything okay?” I saw Ronnie standing in the doorway looking between Jax’s retreating figure and us.

  “Well I just met your illustrious leader, kind of,” I muttered and stuck food in my mouth. I don’t even know what it was, it was all tasteless now.

  “The food on the floor and broken plate was him?” Smitty tried to piece it together. I nodded. “He knew who you were?”

  “Well when I walked in, he froze, didn’t even look at me. When he did turn around the plate dropped and he accused me of trying to seduce him and that I couldn’t beat him or best him,” a little shame washed over me at my own reaction.