Her Shameful Secret

by Susanna Carr

  “Why are you hiding in the bathroom?” he demanded.

  “I’m not dressed,” she said.

  “I’m well aware of that.” His voice was close and she knew he stood on the other side of the door. “But I’ve seen you in a lot less. Come out.”

  “No.” She rested her head against the door and fought the urge to slump to the floor. Her body was punishing her for the sudden movement and the jolt of panic.

  “Is this because of last night?”

  “Maybe.” She took a few shallow breaths but her stomach still threatened to revolt.

  “I told you, I’m not interested in my brother’s castoffs,” he taunted.

  “Yes,” she said, and swallowed hard, “you really proved that last night.”

  Antonio sighed and she pictured him raking his hair with his hand. “We need to meet with the doctor in an hour.”

  “That isn’t necessary,” she insisted. “I’ve been to a doctor recently and everything is fine.”

  “You may be okay with that but I want a second opinion. Why wouldn’t you want to visit one of Italy’s top obstetricians?”

  Isabella’s shoulders sagged in defeat. When Antonio explained it like that, she really didn’t have a reason to decline. “I’ll be ready soon.” If she was lucky.

  “You still need to eat breakfast.”

  The idea made her gag, which she tried to cover up with a loud cough. “No, thanks. I’m not hungry.”

  “Then eat dry toast. Or have a cappuccino.”

  She grimaced as she pictured the milky drink. Oh, God. She was going to be sick again.

  “Bella?” He turned the doorknob.

  “Fine,” she said in a high, urgent voice. She didn’t care how it sounded. The less she argued, the faster he would leave.

  She fought against the nausea, her skin going hot and cold, as she listened to Antonio’s familiar footsteps. When he closed the bedroom door she ran to the toilet and vomited.

  That had been too close, she decided as she lay on the floor. If Antonio had known she had been sick he wouldn’t have left her alone. While she wouldn’t mind having someone take care of her, Antonio would have seen how weak she felt. She couldn’t allow that.

  She was no longer his lover and was now a hindrance. An inconvenient obstacle. She was the reason he wouldn’t inherit what was rightfully his. Isabella couldn’t forget that. If she showed a chink in her armor, if she revealed any vulnerability, Antonio would take advantage. It was his nature.

  She had to get out of here.

  And I will once I’ve visited the doctor, Isabella thought as she turned on the shower. She would demand a plane ticket and deal with any paperwork through the lawyers. She couldn’t be around Antonio anymore. Especially after last night. Because if he didn’t suspect already Antonio would soon realize that he was her only weakness. And he would use that information ruthlessly to get what he wanted.

  Weak and shaky, it took her much longer to get ready than she’d anticipated. She pulled her damp hair back in a tight ponytail and dressed simply in a gray T-shirt, jeans and her scuffed-up flats. Looking in the mirror, she wondered how she’d ever gained Antonio’s attention. She wasn’t beautiful or sexy. There was nothing special about how she looked. She had nothing to offer someone as rich and worldly as Antonio.

  Maybe he’d slept with her because she was different from the women he normally had in his life. She was earthy compared to those glamorous creatures. Isabella grabbed her backpack and strode across the bedroom. Or maybe it was because she’d made it known that she found him desirable. That was more likely. Isabella swung open the door and jumped back when she saw Antonio standing in front of her.

  “Here—eat this.” He offered a piece of dry toast.

  Isabella reared her head back. The bread did nothing to whet her appetite. “I was heading for the dining room.”

  “Where you would have found an excuse not to eat breakfast,” he predicted. “I know you don’t believe me, but you will feel better after you’ve eaten.”

  Once she would have found comfort in the fact that Antonio knew her so well. Now it made her feel vulnerable. She snatched the toast from his hand, deciding she needed to pick her battles. She didn’t want to argue with him when she needed to get her plane ticket.

  She looked at the toast with hesitation and then glanced up at Antonio when she noticed he wasn’t walking away. “Are you just going to stand there and watch me eat?”

  “It’s the only way I’ll know you’ve been fed.”

  Isabella frowned. Why did he care? “I can take care of myself.”

  “I’ve already caught you once when you fainted,” he reminded her as he crossed his arms as if ready for battle. “I don’t want to make it a habit.”

  “It won’t be,” she said as she leaned against the wall and nibbled on the toast. She hated being an inconvenience. Or, worse, an obligation. She always toughed it out on her own, took care of her problems alone, and promptly repaid any favor or debt. She didn’t accept charity and she wasn’t going to start now.

  “Can you give me the address of the doctor’s office?” she asked Antonio, avoiding his intent gaze as she took another bite of toast.

  “No need. I’m coming with you.”

  She almost choked on the bread. “Why? It’s a simple examination and a blood test. You don’t need to be there.”

  “Why do you hate the idea so much?” he asked, and his gaze narrowed on her face. “Do you have something to hide?”

  “No, but I don’t need to be watched like a hawk.” She wanted to handle this alone. Antonio would immediately take over and she knew she would lose the power struggle.

  “We’ll need to do a DNA test to prove paternity,” he explained.

  “I’ll sign a release form and the lab will send you the results,” she promised as she finished the last of the toast. “Or are you afraid I might tamper with the procedure?”

  “Are you always this suspicious when someone tries to help you?” he asked as he arched an eyebrow.

  “Yes.” Because no one offered help unless there was an agenda. The last time she’d accepted assistance she had become a pawn in Giovanni’s games.

  Antonio took a step forward. “Then you need to work on that, because from now on I’m going to be with you every step of the way.”

  She should take that as a threat, but she felt her body soften and warm at the promise. “We both know that’s the last thing you want to do,” she muttered.

  “You are carrying the Rossi heir.” He gestured at her stomach. “This is my concern as much as yours.”

  Isabella automatically wrapped her arms around her belly. “You can’t possibly want to have anything to do with me or my child. You think this baby is proof that I cheated on you.”

  “I wouldn’t blame a child for his parents’ sins.”

  Isabella stilled as Antonio’s words stung. She took a deep breath. “I’m not willing to test that out.”

  Antonio flattened his hands against the wall as a dark, unpredictable energy swirled around him. “Do you think that I’m the kind of man who would mistreat a child?” he asked in a low, biting tone.

  Her instincts said no. She knew Antonio would use all his power and resources to protect a child. But this was Giovanni’s baby. She didn’t know much about the history between the brothers, but she knew it was filled with pain and betrayal. Could Antonio separate his feelings for Giovanni from the feelings he had for the baby?

  “I don’t know,” she admitted, tilting her head up to meet his angry gaze. “I’ve never seen you around kids.”

  “I haven’t seen you around children, either,” he said as he leaned in, “but I know enough about you to know that you would be a good mother. I don’t need a blood test to know that this child is family.”

  Family. She really wanted her child to grow up with a sense of belonging and surrounded by unconditional love. Her mother had given her those things, but there had been times when she had wa
nted acceptance from the family that had shunned her. There had been times when Isabella had wondered what was wrong with her that her relatives should withhold their love and approval.

  “I take care of my family,” Antonio said, his voice strong and clear, “and I will take care of this child.”

  Isabella blinked slowly as she listened to his vow. Why was he claiming this child? She hadn’t expected that. But then why would she? Her own father hadn’t claimed her. Giovanni had only claimed his baby because he could use the information to hurt Antonio. What did Antonio expect to get from all this? What was his end game? Whatever it was, she didn’t think she could afford the price.

  “My baby doesn’t need your financial support,” she declared huskily, and tried to move away. Antonio settled his hand against her shoulder and she stopped.

  “It’s not just money,” he explained. “Your child will one day head the Rossi empire. He will be part of this world. He needs me to guide him through it,” Antonio said as he removed his hand from her shoulder. “Unless you think you’re up for the challenge?”

  Isabella felt her skin flush. She was an outsider while Antonio’s family ruled high society. “Who says my child will want this world?”

  “That should be his decision, not yours. Your child will need to be groomed from the beginning. He will need to attend the best schools, train—”

  “I can provide that now. I am not a disadvantage to my baby,” she insisted, hating how her voice shook.

  She was surprised when Antonio hooked his finger under her chin and guided her face up so she could look into his eyes. “Your baby is already lucky to have you as a mother,” he assured her softly. “You are very nurturing and affectionate.”

  Maybe too much so. During their affair she hadn’t held back on her embraces and caresses. She’d always been touching Antonio. Holding on. Clinging. It had led him to think that she was like that with everyone.

  “But you don’t think I can give this child the sort of life that befits a Rossi heir?” she said.

  Antonio dropped his hand and took a step back. “That’s where I can help.”

  It was too good to be true. There must be some strings attached to his offer. An expectation of good behavior or a short expiration date.

  “For how long? Until it’s no longer in your interest? When you start a family of your own?” With that fiancée of his. The thought of the other woman made Isabella want to crumple up in pain. She’d seen pictures of the sophisticated lady. She was beautiful, from a prominent Italian family. She would be an asset to Antonio while Isabella had been a liability.

  “I am committed to being in this child’s life. From this moment on. Whenever I am needed I’ll be there.”

  “Antonio, you don’t know the first thing about commitment.”

  “How can you say that? I have always met my obligations. I have a duty to—”

  She raised her hand to stop him. “I am not your obligation and you have no duty to my child,” she said fiercely. “I am solely responsible for my baby and I don’t want your help.”

  He gave an arrogant shrug. “Too bad because you already have it.”

  “Your type of help will be more like interference and influence.” She stopped as she thought of her words yesterday. You have no rights over me or my child. That was what this was all about. Isabella closed her eyes as anger washed over her. Oh, she was so stupid for not realizing it sooner. “You want to control the power and the money Giovanni gave to me.”

  “No,” he said through clenched teeth.

  “Are you worried that I would squander the family fortune? Or that I will abuse my power?” She shook her head. “Don’t worry. I didn’t ask for this kind of responsibility. I don’t even want it. But I’m doing it to protect my child’s interests.”

  “If you don’t want the responsibility I can help you with that. If the tests prove that this child is Giovanni’s I’ll pay you a lump sum in exchange for your interest in the Rossi empire. You will have millions more dollars at your fingertips instantly and you won’t have to make any business decisions.”

  Isabella noticed he’d come up with the alternative quickly. It was almost as if he’d been waiting to present it. “And you won’t have to deal with me or my baby,” she pointed out sweetly.

  Antonio’s nostrils flared as he reined in his temper. “My commitment to you and the baby would remain the same.”

  “It’s a tempting offer,” she said with exaggerated politeness, “but I’ll have to think about it.”

  Isabella turned away as she battled conflicting emotions. She’d known Antonio had an ulterior motive, but she was filled with disappointment because she was right.

  She knew better than to accept Antonio’s help. He’d said he was fully committed, but what he really meant was that he would be committed until he could get full control of the Rossi money. The minute he got what he wanted Antonio would discard her from his life with the same ruthlessness as before.

  “Committed? Yeah, right.”

  “What was that?” Antonio was right behind her. She felt his heat and his towering strength.

  Isabella knew she should let it go, but the anger was building up inside her. She slowly turned around, wondering if this was the smartest move, and confronted Antonio. “I think your definition of commitment is different from mine. You couldn’t commit to me, but now you’ll pledge a lifetime of commitment to a child?”

  Antonio clenched his teeth and a muscle bunched in his jaw. “You question my ability to commit when you are the one who cheated?” His harsh voice was almost a whisper.

  “I didn’t cheat,” she said with a weary sigh. “Not that it matters. If Giovanni hadn’t come up with that story I’m sure you would have found another reason to dump me.”

  Antonio’s eyes darkened as tension crackled around them. “That’s not true.”

  “It is. Men like you don’t do relationships.” She had been warned, but she hadn’t listened. She’d thought what she’d had with Antonio had been different. Special. That it would beat the odds.

  “Men like me?”

  “You have money, power and so many choices.” And she’d had nothing to offer to make him want to stay. “Why make a commitment when something new and exciting, something better, is just around the corner?”

  Antonio grabbed her wrist and pulled her close. “I wanted you and only you.”

  She believed him. But she also believed the feeling had been temporary. “And how does your fiancée feel about that?” Isabella asked as she pulled from his grasp.

  “So that is where all this is coming from?” Antonio exhaled sharply and rubbed his hand over his face. “Let me assure you, Bella, I do not have a fiancée.”

  “Isn’t that just a technicality?” she asked as she rubbed her wrist, hating how her pulse skipped and her skin tingled from his touch. “You haven’t put a ring on her finger yet, but there is an agreement.”

  “I was engaged, but that was before I met you.”

  He had been engaged? Maybe he did know how to commit, but just not to her. “To the woman they mentioned in the news? Aida?”

  Antonio nodded. “Her parents were good friends with mine. It was to be an arranged marriage.”

  Isabella’s mouth parted in surprise. “Why would you do something like that?” Antonio was the most sexual man she knew. Passionate. He would have suffered in a paper marriage.

  “We came from the same world, had the same interests, and the marriage would have been advantageous for both families. Aida would have made a good wife.”

  Aida clearly offered everything she could not. Isabella tried not to think about that. “If it was such a good match, why aren’t you married?”

  He rubbed the back of his neck and looked away. “Before we announced our engagement Aida decided she couldn’t bear the idea of getting married to me when she had fallen in love with Gio.”

  “Oh.” Isabella’s eyes widened. “Is that why you and your brother were es
tranged?”

  Antonio shook his head. “Gio never knew, thank God. He had no interest in Aida. She might as well have been invisible to him.”

  Isabella wondered if this was why Antonio was so quick to assume she’d used him to get to Giovanni. His own fiancée had rejected him for his brother. It would have been hard to get over that, arranged marriage or not. “I’m sorry.”

  “Why? I wasn’t in love with Aida, but I would have taken my wedding vows seriously. I know how to make a commitment and how to honor it.” He took a step back and glanced at his watch. “That’s all you need to know.”

  “No, it’s not,” she said with exasperation. Typical of Antonio. If he felt he’d revealed too much, or if it veered into uncomfortable territory, he shut the conversation down immediately.

  “Then let me be clear,” he said in a clipped tone. “It doesn’t matter whether you accept your inheritance or let me buy you out. This is still Gio’s baby and I’m still going to be part of this child’s life. Get used to it.”

  He was in hell.

  The white walls of the doctor’s office were closing in on him. His hands were cold, his chest clenched and he wanted to walk away. Instead he stood by the door, arms folded, as the amplified sounds of an infant’s heartbeat filled the examination room.

  He watched Isabella as she listened. Her face softened and she pressed her lips together as she listened to her baby. The child might have been unplanned, but Isabella had already bonded with this child and wanted it fiercely.

  The ultrasound technician invited him to come closer. Antonio declined with a shake of his head and didn’t move. He felt like he shouldn’t be there, that he was intruding on a very private moment. He’d promised to look after Isabella and her child, but that didn’t erase the fact that he was standing in for his brother. Again.

  And Isabella had made it clear she didn’t want him around. Her instincts were right on target. He was doing all this to gain control of her. She wasn’t going to give up her fortune—that had been a long shot. Which meant marriage. He could make her fall in love with him, but that wouldn’t be enough. He needed to demonstrate that he could accept the baby as his own.