by Sarah Cole
“So, Tanner and I are up on a platform trailer watching all of the pink, crazy and naked walk by, and out of the corner of my eye, I see just this massive roll in the crowd. People started shouting – throwing punches, and then this crazy girl pops up out of nowhere with a giant sequined sign. It had a pretty colorful saying on it, I might add. But the best part about this – earmuffs Kyle and Jonah.” Hunter says to his two-year-old twin nephews who somehow, by some miracle, love me. They’re like cats. They smell the fear and hesitation on me, therefore, they are all over me. I hate that…they rub on you and force you to use a lint roller. The cats, not the children, just to be clear. Well, at least in my experience – which is extremely limited, I might add.
Hunter’s older brother, Andy and his wife, Becca cover their sons’ ears. Once the hands are firmly in place, he continues, “No, the best thing about this is she is dressed up like giant vagina!”
His entire family erupts in laughter, and he continues, “So, I see her and she’s screaming out in a warrior call and swinging that damn sequined feminist sign at people, knocking them over left and right!” he exaggerates, acting it all out like he’s playing charades. His family is rolling in laughter, and although it’s at my expense, I find my dumb ass laughing along wiping tears away. That’s the thing about Hunter… he makes me laugh more than anyone has before.
“I thought I was going to get trampled to death! It was purely self-defense. My crazy boss started it all!” I laugh as Hunter winks at me and gives my knee a squeeze under the table.
“Well, if you weren’t guilty, then why when I came after you did you try to run?”
“I don’t know… instinct?” I shrug, and his family howls again with laughter at us.
“It’s your instinct to run from the law?” Hunter laughs, and again, I shrug. A girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do to not let that terrible mug shot be filed. Those photos are like life’s walk of shame.
“My eyes locked on her big blue ones, and I just couldn’t stop thinking about how pretty she was despite the fact that she was trying to resist arrest. Then when I finally caught her, she wasn’t angry or trying to cry to get out of it, she was cracking inappropriate jokes, and I just knew that I had to know her.”
“Awww.” All the women sigh in unison, including me because despite me being present as this all played out, he hasn’t ever told me about his thoughts on our first meeting before.
“But really, there was just this liveliness about her that I immediately admired. When I took her back up, and realized that she was Tanner’s neighbor, I just took it as a sign. I tried to pass my phone number along to her, but she never called. Later I found out that she intentionally ruined the paper in the garbage so she wouldn’t call. So, I did what the Williams men do best. I pursued her relentlessly until I wore her down. Now, I’m just doing my best to get her to admit to liking me as much as I like her.” He slings his heavy arm over my shoulders and squeezes tight.
“Well that is certainly a story to tell for years to come. Now tell me. Verity, are you as smitten with my boy as I can see he is with you?” Trish asks me sincerely with a twinkle in her eye. I look to Hunter and he just smiles. Without looking back at his mom, I continue to look up at Hunter and smile back.
“Yeah, I think I might be.” I reply, earning smiles all around.
***
The lights on the tree twinkle with multi colored lights and the musical stylings of Kenny G’s Christmas album flow through the speakers as Hunter and I lay side by side on the floor of his parents’ living room floor. Everyone else went to bed a while ago in anticipation for Santa’s visit, and now it is just us relishing in the sweet quiet of the night. We’ve been chatting about anything and everything when suddenly he sits up, tugging on my hand that is still held firmly in his grip.
“What?” I ask with concern. When a wry smile forms on his face, I become more curious than anything.
“Come on!” he pulls me up to stand with him.
“Come on, where?”
“Just get some shoes and a coat on and come with me, pretty girl.” He says, tugging me towards the back door.
Hastily, I pull on a pair of rubber boots that are sitting by the door. I think they belong to one of his brothers’ wives, but they fit well enough. I find my coat where Hunter’s mom hung it with the rest of the family’s and I chase him out the back door and down the steps. He’s already gone once I get outside, but since it has snowed several inches in the past couple of hours, I am able to just track his footsteps in the snow. I’m basically like one of those mountain men on the National Geographic reality shows right now. The thought makes me laugh out loud, the sound being swallowed by the quiet of the snowy night. I’m still laughing when the first snowball pelts me in the forehead, and I hear an eruption of laughter from somewhere in the bushes. I shriek and another cold, icy fun bomb lands square in my chest where my coat isn’t zipped up all the way, and it melts right into my cleavage. So, cold. So, fucking cold!
I don’t waste any time as I squat down to gather up the world’s fattest snowball. It’s basically one third of a snowman. Just as I’m finally standing with my forty-pound snowball, I’m tackled face first into a snowdrift by a complete maniac…or Hunter. Same difference.
“Gotcha!” he says into my ear, repeating the word in just the same way he said that the first time we met each other, melting my frozen body in an instant.
He doesn’t say anything more, but instead rolls off of me and proceeds to make a giant man-sized snow angel.
“Come on babe, play with me.”
“Why is it that you always make the most innocent things so dirty?” I laugh, leaning over to smack his broad, muscular chest. He captures my mitten clad hand, and brings it to his lips, placing a kiss against my cold fingers. I’m distracted just enough that I don’t see his other hand swooping in to plant itself along with a pile of snow right in my face.
I scream loud enough to wake the dead… or at least all of the dogs in the neighborhood, but before I can fully recover from the unexpected assault, Hunter is off and running, giggling like a giddy schoolgirl.
“Hunter Williams! You’re a giant, butt head!” I shout, running after him, slipping repeatedly in the frozen snow.
“Butt head?” he laughs from a few feet away.
“Give me a minute. I’ll come up with something a bit more fitting!” I huff, out of breath. Running in snow is tough work – kind of like running in sand on the beach except a whole lot less sexy, and a lot more frostbite potential.
The cold air burns my lungs, but in a way, it feels so good. I decide to give into the madness since I’m already cold and wet, and I flop back down into the thick layer of snow and make a snow angel of my own. I heavily exhale, watching my breath leave me in a cloud in the dim Christmas lights. A bright flash blinds me, and all I can see are little spots for a moment.
“You are so beautiful.” Hunter says softly, stashing his phone back into the chest pocket of his heavy coat.
“And you’re just trying to butter me up since you lured me out here to attack me.” I stand, putting my hands on my hips playfully.
“You look sexy in mittens.” He tries again causing me to laugh.
“Better, but not enough.” I smirk and take a step closer and he meets me chest to chest. The snow has stopped and the nearly full moon is reflecting off the snow, lighting up the night.
“How about this?” he asks, wrapping his arms around my waist and holding me firmly against his body.
“How about what?”
“How about since the very first time I laid eyes on you, I knew it would be impossible for me to ever look away. How about, whenever I think about the possibility of you not being in my life, I feel like I could break into a million pieces. How about, you are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen and whenever I’m with you, my heart feels like it could fucking explode out of my chest because it beats so fast. How about… I’m so fucking in love with you, I ca
n’t see straight.” I gasp. The sweet words catch me off guard, as well as his profession of love. Also, I’m utterly shocked about how sure of himself he sounds. I’m not used to that. I’m used to feeling all the feelings and being the brave one to put it out there, then seeing the look of terror cross my boyfriend’s face before they squeak out the sentiment in return. It never felt right – forced from both sides is more like it. It never felt like this. This feels better, stronger, and safer. Hunter is the difference. He feels right.
“I…” I start to speak, but I’m interrupted suddenly when he puts a gloved hand firmly over my mouth, effectively silencing me. I tilt my head in question, and he answers.
“I don’t know what you were or are going to say, but just know that I don’t expect you to reciprocate those feelings. Not yet, at least. I know it’s soon, but I also know that I’ve been falling in love with you since you did that shitty Austin Powers impersonation the second we met.” His lips quirk in a smile, but he doesn’t remove his hand from my mouth. “I don’t want to scare you off or pressure you, but I like what we have and I can’t imagine my life without it – without you now. So, I’ll wait, because when you say it, I want to know you said it because you mean it and feel for me the way I do you. I’ll wait as long as that takes, Verity.” He lowers his hand and I propel myself into his arms even though we were almost touching to begin with. His mouth descends upon mine, kissing me until I’m breathless and I feel the warmth spreading to all of the cold and numb parts of my body.
“Damn, woman. You’re going to kill me with your mouth.” He breathes against my bare neck after breaking our kiss.
“Well I don’t want to do that. I’d like to keep you around for a little while.” I reply, and as much as I want to lay out my feelings for Hunter in this moment, I don’t. I don’t know how to translate what I feel into words, and I have a terrible habit of putting my foot in my mouth. I’d probably end up making him think I didn’t feel the same way. I’d rather let him know for the first time in a way that makes him feel special – special like how he makes me feel all the time. The only way I know how to do that is with my words and feelings written out in black and white for the world to see.
chapter 17
LESSON #17: Always triple check before you let the world see your work.
VERITY:
Christmas came and went, and the holiday as well as the few weeks since have been fantastic. I almost didn’t notice my parents had abandoned me. Almost. I missed my mom’s Christmas morning monkey bread more than I’ll ever admit to – also my stocking filled with makeup and gift cards for coffee and nail salons. Mom and Dad promise that Santa will make a special trip from the North Pole when they get back, but it just isn’t the same thing. Regardless, Hunter’s family is nothing short of amazing, and I’m questioning why I was so scared to meet them in the first place. That’s just me I suppose- I’m a worrier, and age and life experience hasn’t lent me any sort of hand to help ease that.
I pull off my headset and let my forehead slam onto the keyboard on my desk, sending a stack of inspiration board clippings fluttering to the floor.
“Stop that!” Tally hisses. “The last time you did that you had to have IT unlock your computer, not to mention the little square bruises that were left on your forehead for a week!” She reprimands me like a mother scolding her child. That comparison isn’t that far off from reality. This is our life – we keep each other in check on the daily.
I lift my head rolling my eyes at her and her perfectly styled hair and outfit, and her perfectly edited column that made its deadline.
“Stuff it you suck up.” I say, only half joking and she knows it. She flips me off like the lady she is.
“Don’t be jealous, Ver. The only reason my piece is on time this release and yours isn’t is because you actually have someone sticking the P in your V, and all I have is Javier. Javier isn’t much of a talker, as you already know, so that leaves plenty of time to work and wallow in self-pity. You know, what we used to do together.” She says dismally. Javier is what she named her giant glittery vibrator, and also kind of disturbing that she has recently started referring to it like it’s actually sentient.
“Tally, honey? Maybe we shouldn’t talk about Javier anymore. People are going to start asking about him, and I don’t think you actually want to answer those questions.” I soothe, leaning over to rub small circles on her bony shoulder and she nods.
“Ok, sorry for my mini meltdown.” She apologizes. Not missing a beat, she asks, “Is there anything I can help you out with? I know Ashley only let you have until five o’clock to get that final draft submitted.”
“I have it written, but I keep second guessing this. Is it too mushy? Too personal? I don’t know. I know that there is legitimate article content in here and I have that interview with Dr. Rose, the relationship expert. I just want to be sure that when I have Hunter read this, it is perfect and will say everything he wouldn’t let me say on Christmas Eve.”
“Here.” She snaps her fingers before holding them open and wiggling them. “Let me read it, and I’ll let you know how it reads.”
“You sure?”
“Duh, Verity. Duh. I’m your sister from another mister. Just let me read your profession of love and misjudgment.”
“Please don’t ever say that again, Tals.” I give her a withering look.
“What?”
“You know what.” I say in the most monotone voice I can muster, as I give her a bored look. Honestly it doesn’t take much effort.
“Oh, I see then. It’s alright for you to completely butcher a proper English accent regularly, but the moment I decide to try out an American phrase, you act like a toff and jump down my neck? You’re such a slag!” she punches me in the shoulder, and she doesn’t hold back. Dear lord, please tell me her doctor didn’t change her meds again.
“Yeah… no idea what you just said, but I’ll say thank you.”
“Believe me, you shouldn’t.” She retorts with only the barest hint of a smile.
“If you say so.”
“I do.”
“Damn it! Would you just read the article already?” I throw my hands up in mock exasperation.
“Am I going to need to separate you ladies?” Ashley says from behind us, looking over the rims of her oversized black Prada glasses.
“No!” we respond quickly and in unison. If there’s one thing that’s certain in this office, it is that when Ashley says something she means it. If you irritate her, she’s not above putting you in the janitorial closet with Steve, the mop stroking, floor shining wizard.
“Alright then. Back to work, Verity. You have forty-five minutes to get that final draft on my desk. I want to have time to review everything since this is the year’s largest issue. Great job on the Spring Fashion Week spread, Tally.” The Feminazi turns sharply on her eight hundred dollar heels, and I swear as she struts away I hear her chanting, “tick tock, tick tock,” to herself. I truly believe that everyone in this office has a few screws loose and most definitely need medication to prevent them from coming completely unhinged.
“Well, I suppose I better get to reading.” Tally says, snatching the article back as her eyes begin to skim the incredibly personal words that are typed there. I don’t know why I feel so nervous having my best friend read this when it’s going to print for millions of readers within a matter of days.
***
The day dawns bright and friggin’ cold. I pull my coat up tighter around my neck hoping to block some of the cold out as I walk down the street to work. I know that I could walk faster had I tucked my feet into some more sensible shoes, but let’s face it. My feet are pretty much numb from the cold anyways at this point so it doesn’t really matter.
I grab a coffee at the Starbucks on the corner before heading into work, hoping that the caffeine will make a dent in my sour mood, or at the very least, warm me up a little bit. I’m already late because I slept like garbage all night, and my nerves ar
e shot. Hunter has worked weird shifts for nearly two weeks straight now, meaning I’ve only seen him for a grand total of five hours in that time span. Not to mention, he called me late last night to tell me that he and Tanner had been shot at, but not to worry because they were both fine, and the suspect was taken into custody. Don’t worry? Don’t worry. Yeah, that’ll be the day – when Verity Peterson doesn’t worry.
“Worrying is my second job at this point.” I mutter to myself like a crazy lady, cramming my body into the elevator with at least ten other people that probably hate mornings as much as I do. I’m dreading this day. Release day. Every month it’s the same old crap. Excitement and relief over a successful release, but after that – meetings, meetings and more meetings. All damn day. We have ideas planned out months in advance, but today is when the assignments are divided out and finalized for a few issues in advance. Today being release day also means that today is the day when Hunter will finally know how I feel about him.
As I mosey towards my desk, taking my sweet ass time to put off heading to a meeting for as long as possible, I spot an oversized bouquet of flowers on top of my desk. It is a huge bouquet full of almost black dahlias, blush colored roses, anemones, and big white flowers that I can’t place with eucalyptus flowing out of the vase beneath it. It is gorgeous. Nestled in the blooms is an ecru colored envelope with my name printed on it. I eagerly pluck the heavy envelope from the arrangement and rip it open. My eyes scan the note, and my heart flip flops in my chest.
Verity-
I miss your smile and your kisses.
Let me make it up to you this weekend.
I love you from now until forever.
Call me when you’re free. I need to hear your voice.
-Hunter
P.S. Tanner says hi. :)
I haven’t told Hunter about the article yet. In all honesty, I hadn’t devised any sort of plan to reveal my feelings to him, which is stupid since this whole thing is one big elaborate love not to him. But if one thing is for certain right here, right now, it’s that I want Hunter to read that article as soon as possible. I don’t think I can stand another day of him not knowing how I feel about him.
