Resisting Temptation

by K. C. Lynn

  I give a little wave back. “Hi girls, it’s nice to meet you. Katelyn has told me great things about you all. Thank you for inviting me to join you today.”

  “No problem,” Julia replies kindly. “We are glad you could come.”

  “Yup. Any friend of Katelyn’s is a friend of ours,” Kayla adds, as we all walk over and sit on the mat in front of the big sparring ring.

  “Okay, so you guys have to come on Saturday morning to Centennial Park,” Katelyn says while pointing behind her to where I am assuming this park is located. “I will be teaching my first outdoor yoga class.” She claps her hands excitedly, bringing a smile to my face.

  “Oh that’s great. I need the workout,” Julia responds, not looking like she needs a workout at all.

  With a scoff, Kayla speaks my thoughts. “Julia, whatever. Seriously, how the hell do you go from having a baby in your belly only a month ago to having some supermodel fucking body again?”

  “Oh stop. I do not. I’m just good at hiding it.”

  Katelyn rolls her eyes. “How can you hide it? You’re wearing yoga shorts and a tank top that molds to your body like second skin.”

  Shaking her head, Julia replies with a laugh. “Trust me, I am hiding it, but thank you ladies for the compliment.”

  “Katelyn showed me pictures of your daughter. She’s very cute,” I say with sincere honesty. Katelyn had a picture on her fridge of her and Annabelle that she got from the baby shower. And it’s true; the little baby with dark brown hair, warm pink skin and ice blue eyes is adorable.

  “Thank you, she means the world to me.” Her eyes shine bright and her skin glows with the truth of her words.

  Kayla comes back with a witty reply that I unintentionally zone out on, as my eyes wander over the large gym. I have to admit it’s a pretty great place and has tons of space. It seems they have something here for everyone. I’m a person who has always enjoyed exercise, but just over the last two years I have a newfound love of running. It’s something that my therapist Dr. Mathews recommended to help with the constant anxiety attacks I had after Iraq. I quickly became addicted, and it has done wonders for me. I still have medication in case the odd one sneaks up on me, and it’s something I can’t get under control myself, but I haven’t had one in almost a year. It’s been a long process, but with my faith in God, the love of my family and the help of Dr. Mathews, I’m almost my old self again… except that missing piece of my heart.

  Don’t go there, Faith.

  “Who’s at the bakery for you, Grace?” Katelyn asks, thankfully pulling me from my thoughts.

  “Just Mac at the moment. I’m heading back over there right after here. I have an interview with a high school girl today. I’m hoping she works out. Ruby and Mac have both been great, but I could use a little more help. Things have been even more busy than usual, since the weather has started warming up.”

  “Well I’m not sure what kind of help you’re needing, but I could help out a couple evenings or days a week until you find someone,” I offer, before I can think better of it. Not that I mind pitching in if she needs help, but she might not be comfortable with that since she doesn’t know me at all yet. I give myself a mental slap.

  Thankfully Grace doesn’t seem phased and even smiles back kindly, “Thanks, Faith, that’s awful nice of ya. I might need to take you up on that. Kayla and Julia have been great too, with pitching in when they can.”

  She seriously has the cutest accent. Right when I’m about to reply, Grace turns away, to look over at two really tall guys as they walk out of a room at the other end of the gym. I realize one of them must be her fiancé, by the way her eyes eat him up and her cheeks turn pink. I watch them make their way to us, wanting to get a good look at the sexy men Katelyn has spoken about.

  My eyes draw to the guy on the right, and even though he is a fair distance away, for some reason, a familiarity tugs at my mind as if I’ve seen him before, yet I have no idea where. My head tilts to the side and I squint to see him better. The closer he gets, the stronger the feeling. Then it happens – the memory and recognition slamming into me like a freight train.

  Oh. My. God. My heart starts to pound so loud it’s all I can hear. I feel the walls close in around me while my breathing turns quick and shallow.

  After a flirtatious wink to Grace his eyes move to me and I watch his gaze narrow with an inquisitive look as he tries to place me. I turn away quickly, hoping to stop him from recognizing me, and manage to get up on shaking legs.

  “Oh my god. Oh god, oh god…” Tears blur my vision as I keep my head down.

  “Faith? What is it, what’s wrong?” Katelyn asks worriedly, grabbing my arm to stop me.

  I rip it from her grasp. “I’m sorry. I have to go. I have to get out of here.” My words are raspy as I choke out the response through labored breaths.

  “What? Why?”

  I’m about to tell her I will explain later, when a shocked curse fills the air, letting me know the moment Sawyer has recognized me. Without a second thought, I flee as fast as I can, stumbling over my own feet as I try to make a hasty getaway. Right when I’m about to look up, and see how close I am to the door, I end up slamming into a brick wall.

  “Whoa.” Big, warm hands grab my shoulders to steady me.

  “Oh, I’m so sorry, I…” my apology turns into a gasp when I look up into the face of the one man I never thought I would ever see again. The same man I see in my dreams almost every night.

  Cade’s fingers tighten on my shoulders and his hazel eyes widen in shock just a second before they turn to ice. “What the fuck are you doing here?”

  I flinch from his harsh tone, and feel my heart shatter all over again at the disgust on his face. Tears spill down my cheeks and a small sob slips past my throat as I rip from his grasp and run out the door.

  The moment I get outside, I brace my hands on my knees and try to take in lungfuls of much needed air, as panic threatens to choke me. Not here… please, not now. Standing back up, I look around trying to get my bearings, and the moment I look to the left, I know what direction I want to take.

  “Faith, wait!” Katelyn bolts out the door and grabs my arm just as I’m about to take off. Sadness washes over her worried expression when our eyes meet. “Oh, Faith, talk to me. What’s going on?”

  “It’s him!” I sob out, “it’s all of them!” She watches me in confusion, not having any idea what I’m talking about. “Iraq!”

  It takes a minute before shock and realization dawns in her eyes. “What? Oh my god. Oh, Faith, I’m so sorry. I never…”

  I rip out of her grasp and start backing away. “It’s okay, it’s not your fault. I just… I need to get out of here.”

  She nods. “Okay, just let me grab my keys…”

  I shake my head and cut off her reply. “No, stay. Please, I just need to be by myself right now. I’m so sorry. Please understand.” She nods, but guilt plagues me as a tear slips down her face. “I’m so sorry. I’ll call you later.” I don’t wait for her response, in fear of someone else walking out, before turning around and taking off.

  With my vision blurry from tears, I run toward the one place I’ve loved going to since coming here. The bright morning sun beats down on me, but my body is plagued with too many emotions to feel any of its warmth. They rush through my veins and crawl up my throat, trying to suffocate me, as memories from two years ago play through my head. Good ones, bad ones, they all hit me at once…

  The unsuspecting smile of a beautiful but dark man, who captured my attention. The evenings of singing to him in the sunset. His hands and mouth exploring my body as I explored his. A man whose eyes held me captive, and made me feel like the most beautiful woman in the world, as he moved inside of me, not only claiming my body but also claiming my heart. The same man who’s shown me the only loving touch I would know for the next two years, and maybe the rest of my life.

  Then come the ugly memories. The ones of rough, unwanted hands that delivered not o
nly pain to my body, but shame to my soul. Ones that tore at my clothes, and took what was not offered to them. The sound of a little boy’s screams, as he begged them to stop, while he was forced to watch me be violated in the worst way.

  This is what bitches are for, boy. Fucking, not singing. We will make a man out of you yet.

  A sob of agony rips from my throat and I push myself harder and faster. The burn of my legs and lungs still not enough to quiet the evil running through my head.

  “Do you still believe in your God, female?” he asks, holding my cross necklace over my beaten and naked body. When I don’t answer him, he sends another blow to my already battered face. “ANSWER ME!”

  “Yes,” I choke out through the blood that pools in my mouth. The sounds of a little boy’s broken sobs fill the air, and rip through my already tortured heart.

  “You are a stupid, stupid woman. I will teach you who the real God is. And before you leave this earth you will call me Allah.”

  This disgusting person may have stolen my body and tortured my soul, but he would not take my faith. Not ever. I stare defiantly into his malevolent dark eyes, my fear long forgotten. “Over my dead body.”

  He responds with a malicious smile, “So be it, bitch.”

  Spotting the crystal blue waves in the near distance, I push myself harder as I race toward the beautiful, deserted beach. As soon as my feet hit the sand I slow only enough to toe off my running shoes and ankle socks before rushing into the ice-cold ocean. Once I’m far enough out, I dive in headfirst and let the fresh water steal my breath and cleanse my soul.

  My lungs begin to burn so much it’s almost unbearable, but it does the trick. The dirty and ugly memories begin to wash away, but instead of being replaced with beautiful ones of the man who once held my heart, it holds the one of a man who was severely tortured and beaten… all because of me. The same man who saved my life then refused to ever see me again. And the worst part is, I still don’t know if it’s because he blames me, or because he can’t bear to look at me knowing what they did to me.

  *

  Cade

  Shock has me completely rooted to my spot. My pulse races and blood roars in my ears. Emotions that I have fought hard to keep buried explode like a volcano, as my mind tries to process what I just saw, or rather who. I stare at the door that the girl I have thought about for the last two years, dreamt about and fucking craved like an addict, just ran out of. The same girl that I have had to use every bit of willpower I possess to stay away from.

  “Jesus, Walker. Did you need to be so fucking harsh? She’s clearly just as surprised as we are.” Sawyer’s heated remark snaps me back into reality, making me remember the way Faith flinched at my tone, and how her emotional, wet, emerald eyes shone with hurt.

  I grind my teeth against the tightness in my chest. Fuck… Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! What the hell is she doing here?

  Katelyn walks back in with tears streaming down her shocked and pale face. “Oh my god. It was you guys. You’re the ones who pulled her out of hell.” The girls’ gasps of shock fills the deafening silence of the room. Katelyn shakes her head in disbelief and looks over at them, “I never said their names I always just referred to Jaxson and Sawyer as your husbands. I knew Navy SEALS pulled her out, but I would have never thought for a moment…” she trails off before looking over at me, her eyes narrowing angrily.

  “And you…” she points an accusing finger at me, “Who the hell do you think you are talking to her like that? She didn’t know. None of us did.”

  I don’t bother to respond, knowing nothing I say will make up for the way I reacted to seeing her. By the way she holds my gaze, I know that she knows everything about Faith and me.

  She buries her face in her hands and cries. “Oh my god. I can’t believe this is happening. This is supposed to be a fresh start for her.” All the girls rush over to comfort her.

  “Where is she?” I ask. Surprised to hear how gruff my voice is.

  She glares at me before answering. “She took off. She said she needed to be alone, and I wanted to give her space to sort everything out.”

  “Do you know where?” Julia asks quietly.

  “I’m guessing the beach, she’s been going there… HEY!” Katelyn jumps in front of me as I start toward the door. “Where the hell do you think you’re going?”

  I look down at her in annoyance. “To look for her.”

  “Oh no you’re not!” She pokes her finger in my chest hard enough that I’m surprised it doesn’t snap off. “You stay away from my cousin. Do you hear me? You have caused her enough pain.” I try to keep my cool, knowing she’s just looking out for her cousin, but she is out of her fucking mind if she thinks she can stop me from seeing Faith.

  “Katelyn,” Julia starts timidly, “maybe Cade should go talk to her. She shouldn’t be by herself right now, and clearly they have a lot of things they need to discuss.”

  When she doesn’t budge, Grace puts a hand on her shoulder and adds, “He won’t hurt her.”

  “He already has!”

  I push aside the guilt at hearing that, knowing I did the right thing no matter how hard it was and glare down at her, “You think I don’t know that? Why the fuck do you think I’ve stayed away from her?” Her eyes narrow as she assesses me, trying to ascertain if I’m telling the truth. I don’t bother to wait for her approval; I walk around her and out the door.

  As soon as I pull away I crank my music, trying to block out the memories that are trying to resurface, but it doesn’t work. They begin to play through my head like a fucking movie: the sound of her sweet, soft voice when she sang to me, the way her beautiful smile would warm every cold, dark place inside of me, her cries of pleasure as I sunk into the sweetest, warmest body I’ve ever felt… a body that later was violated and taken against her will.

  Rage pounds through my veins, and before I can stop it, the memory slams into me like a fucking tsunami…

  My beaten and broken body hangs limp from the chains that shackle my wrists to the stone wall. And for the first time, I can feel the warmth of the blood that soaks my back and chest, the paralysis of the drugs from the last dose finally wearing off. But the agony my body feels is nothing compared to the burning pain in my chest, for fear of what they have done to Faith.

  FUCK, FUCK, FUCK… We need to get the fuck out of here. I’m just about to look up to see if Jaxson and Sawyer have come to yet, when the sound of a boy’s cries and heavy boot falls make their way down the cement hall.

  I keep my head down at the sound of our cell door opening, not wanting them to know yet that the drugs have worn off, in case it isn’t on purpose. I have no idea what else these fuckers have in store for us.

  “Which one is it? Which one does the bitch belong to?” My body tenses at the man’s question in Arabic, knowing they’re talking about Faith.

  “I will not tell you no more,” the boy sobs out.

  A loud crack fills the air before I hear the sound of the boy’s pain. “TELL US!” he screams, “Your father wants me to bring him!”

  My head snaps up at the two men in our cell. One of them holds the boy by his collar and has his hand risen to hit him again. “I’m right here, motherfucker.” The pain in my voice is evident as I call myself out to him.

  He tosses the boy to the other guy then walks up to me, and bends down to get in my face, “So the bitch belongs to you, yes?” I don’t confirm or deny his question. “She’s a fiery one, Soldier.”

  A dangerous violence rushes through my veins like hot lava. “If you hurt her, I will fucking kill you.”

  “Too late,” he replies smugly. “Don’t worry, she’s still alive. But we had to show our boy here what it means to be a man, and what you do with bitches like her.”

  The boy’s sobs tell me that what this bastard is saying is the truth. “And damn did she fight, but in the end it was not enough. We fucked her so…

  I don’t let him finish; my fury fuels a strength I didn’t know I still po
ssessed. Kicking my legs up from under me I wrap them around the motherfucker’s neck, and with a quick twist I hear the sickening crack before I let his dead body fall limp to the ground in front of me.

  The other guard runs out and starts screaming for the others. Instantly, the sound of several boot falls pound down the hall toward our cell.

  “Oh fuck!” The curse comes from Evans.

  The little boy stares at me, his eyes wide with shock and fear, as tears stream down his cheeks. “I’m going to help her. I promise, I will try to get you guys out of here and…”

  That’s all he got out before our cell was filled with, what had to be, at least twelve of the bastards. They all had their whips, chains and any other torture devices they possessed.

  I took every lash of the whip, every slice of their dagger and every blow that broke my bones in silence. And no matter how much my body screamed for me to give up, I didn’t, because I knew my time would come. I would not stop fighting until I got her out of here, and when I did, I would fucking kill every single one of them that touched her.

  I’m brought back to the present as I pull up to the beach, my body now wound tight with lethal rage as the memory still hovers at the edge of my mind.

  I drop my head back and take a minute to calm myself. Jesus, why the hell did this have to happen now? Trying to stay away from her when she was all the way on the other side of the fucking country was hard enough, but now that she’s in the same town… Fuck!

  Letting out a heavy breath, I get out of the truck and hope it doesn’t take me long to find her. When I start across the sand I spot a pair of running shoes and socks, but no sign of her. As my gaze spans the beach, something in the ocean catches my attention. And sure enough, there she is, emerging from the crystal blue water like some fucking earth angel.

  She doesn’t notice me as she wrings her long, red hair out. Instead of walking out like I expect her to, she stands in the water and lets the waves crash against her ankles. Letting her head fall back, she stares up at the clear blue sky and raises her arms out at her sides, palms up, basking in the warmth of the sun. With the way the sunlight hits her, you would swear it was only shining for her. It throws me back to that first week, when every time I would walk into that clearing I would see the sunset cast a glow on her as she strummed her guitar.