Like Falling

by Jaden Wilkes

  “Have you ever been in love before?” Sarah asked him, surprising herself with the bold question.

  He paused, thought about it and said “I mistook something for love at one time, but now that I have you I realize how foolish I was.”

  She wracked her mind to come up with a name, it couldn’t have been Tiff, then who? It dawned on her and she said “The mystery complicated person in Prince Rupert? Did you see her when we were there?”

  Tyr looked down, he looked guilty. “I did,” he said at last.

  Sarah’s heart dropped, she felt sick. “Did you do anything with her?”

  Tyr looked up, surprise on his face, “Oh god no, I could never do that to you.” He grabbed her hands and pulled her to him, kissed her lips and said “I can’t imagine ever tasting somebody else, or feeling somebody else...there is no way I could stand another woman coming near me now that I’ve had you.” His eyes implored her and she softened to him. She believed him and her wave of nausea passed.

  “Why did you have to see her then?” she demanded.

  “It’s like you and the Eric thing, something you had to do, right? Well, I had to tell her that it was completely over between her and I. It was over a long time ago, but she always held some kind of hope in her heart, I had to go squash it once and for all.”

  “What’s the story there?”

  He hesitated before saying “She’s older, really needy and dependant on me. We hooked up when I was pretty young, she was our English teacher.”

  “Oh my god, that’s...so wrong,” she said. “Nic knew about it?”

  “I was living with Nic’s family on and off by then, she knew but I made her promise to never tell anyone,” Tyr said. He hesitated and continued, “It was grade 11 when it started, I was 17 and she was 28. She was married and lonely, and I was a loner looking for some kind of acceptance. We were drawn to each other but it wasn’t right, it was never right.”

  Sarah looked at him, the pain he carried over the relationship, the pain that should have never been his to carry, the burden the older woman had placed on him. “It wasn’t your fault though, you were just a kid.”

  “Now you can say that about you and the Adam, he took advantage of you too, can you see that?”

  Adam was different though, wasn’t he? She didn’t know anymore. “I’m 18 though, you were a minor, there’s a big difference between 16 and almost 19.”

  “Not to me, I still hate the guy for what he did to you. I can’t hate Amanda for her part in it though, but I can see now that she is really messed up.”

  “Did you see her after you graduated?”

  “Here and there, I graduated four years ago, I took two years to work and travel around before I figured out what I wanted to do.”

  “So you’re, what, how old?” She always assumed he was a year older than her. He was revealing so much tonight, it was odd how little she had known of him, his life.

  “I’m 22, I’ll be 23 in October.”

  “I’ll be 19 in May,” she offered. He nodded, he already knew that. She needed to know more. “Where did you work? Where did you travel?”

  “I worked where I work now, at the shipyards,” he held up his rough hands. “You don’t get these pushing pencils.” I love those hands, the way he holds me, his fingers inside my pussy, she was distracted by her train of thought. “I went here and there, mostly Europe. I spent some time in Denmark with my relatives,” he held up his arm, “that’s where I got the wolf done, most of it anyhow. Julia finished the rest for me when I came home.”

  “Wow, that’s pretty amazing. I’ve never been outside of Alberta until last year.” She was feeling more and more out of her league the more he opened up. She had lived such a simple life compared to him.

  “I loved it, I highly recommend travel, it really changes a person.”

  “I can imagine,” she said. “How did you end up in my humble little first year archaeology class?”

  “Nic had talked me into enrolling because it was the only course she needed from first year. She wanted to make sure I could take notes for her because, well, she’s not the most conscientious student in case you haven’t noticed,” he laughed. “It was the second archaeology course I took, and I’m so damned happy I ended up there. I’m so happy I found you.”

  Sarah stared at him, searching his face for signs of the barely literate bad boy she had mistaken him for when they first met. There was nothing of that image left, in front of her now was a devastatingly handsome, brilliant, witty but broken man. She realized she had gone a moment or two too long without speaking, but didn’t know what to say. She stood up, took his hand and pulled him towards the bed instead of voicing the conflict developing inside of her. She wanted to express it to him physically, it was the only way she knew how.

  He followed, ever willing to go with her under the covers. They stripped down and tangled themselves up, limbs entwining and skin sliding against each other. She slid her ass up against the front of him, wiggled and teased him, he put his arms around her and thrust against her. She could feel his cock pressing against her from behind, so she wiggled herself against him again and opened herself to him.

  “Is this ok?” she asked, hoping he’d find his way inside. She was pulsing with need and felt an overwhelming desire to be pinned down and fucked from behind.

  “Yes...it’s...good,” he said into her ear, his voice ragged and low. “This is exactly what I need.” He reached down and pushed her legs apart slightly, finding her entrance from behind. He slid a finger inside of her and spread her slick moisture around her folds, preparing her for his dick. She arched her back and tilted her pelvis to grant him access. He pressed against her slit and with one quick thrust divided her with his rock hard cock. Sarah gasped as he started to thrust against her, filling her and fucking her into a mindless bundle of nerves and pleasure.

  “I love you, I want you, I don’t ever want to be apart from you,” he said into her ear and reached around to cup her face with his hand. She twisted her head to see him, he wrapped his rough hand around her throat and held her close. She couldn’t move, couldn’t get away but didn’t struggle.

  “Oh I like this Tyr, I like this,” she whispered, panting in rhythm with his thrusts. She was completely at his command and felt something building inside of her like it never had before.

  Tyr wrapped his other hand in her hair and pulled her tighter against him. He was pushing into her harder than he had before and was grunting and breathing in her ear. She felt trapped, he pulled her hair harder and held her captive at the end of his dick. She thrilled in the feeling of being controlled, her body responded by going almost limp with her desire.

  “Fuck me Tyr, come on, fuck me,” she groaned, surprising herself with her words and her need. Tyr responded by wrapping his arm around her waist and lifting her up onto her hands and knees. He covered her body with his, she was pressed back into the bed, her ass in the air and her face muffled by the pillows. She started to say his name again, over and over like a mantra, as though this would keep her connected to her body. He joined her, saying her name, speaking it as though he were weaving a spell. She could feel their orgasm building together. It was as though they were of one mind, one body, and there was no way one could finish without the other.

  Sarah could hardly breathe, she was gasping faster now and could feel him shuddering on the verge of his release. She knew she was close and couldn’t wait a moment longer, she tensed, felt time stand still for just a few moments, long enough to take one shuddering breath and collapse into bright raw nerves of pleasure. She felt all the tension leave his body, he still held her up with one arm, but slowly sunk into the bed behind her. She rolled slightly, feeling him slide out of her and was immediately saddened by the lost connection. She turned over and faced him, still trembling from the intensity of their savagery.

  “What are you doing to me?” he asked quietly, smiled and ran a finger along her face. They stared into each other’s eyes for a
moment, the gaze holding more than either one could express at that moment. Sarah sighed and moved forward to kiss his neck. She rested her lips on the curve of his throat and felt his pulse pumping blood, a steady repetition that asserted his virility and her claim on him. She was in his blood now, she was circulating somewhere through his veins, as surely as he was in hers. She thought for a moment if this was how an addiction began, the creeping sense that nothing would ever be the same if you lost the thing that gave you your high. Addiction doesn’t feel this right, she thought and closed her eyes. They lay like that for a time, quiet and touching, symbiotic. Finally she couldn’t ignore the rumbling in her stomach any longer, and neither could he. They both smiled at it and she said “You obviously have to feed me, what have you got?”

  “Hold that thought, and don’t you dare get dressed, I’ll be back in a moment.” Tyr got up, pulled his boxers on and headed to the small kitchen. Sarah stretched and took in her surroundings. His most personal space was as elegantly decorated as the living area. She felt a small tug of satisfaction that she had apparently hit the boyfriend jackpot. He was all bad boy attitude and tattoos on the surface, but underneath he was sophisticated and caring, affectionate and kind. And he fucks me like one of those guys on the pornos I watch in my room.

  Out of reflex she reached for her phone. She should text Naomi and let her know she would not be coming home tonight. Her text alert was lit up already, so she slid the bar to see what Naomi had to say.

  It was Eric. Sweet, happy, undeniably crazy hot Eric. Easy life, family approves Eric. Sarah hadn’t thought about him much since they got back and just assumed that he had gotten the same lack of chemistry that Naomi claimed, so he’d not contact her. She was dying to see what it said and instantly felt ashamed of her reaction. Tyr had never mentioned Eric and she had chosen to ignore the issue as well. She read, “It was really lovely to meet you Sarah, and I want you to know that I had a great time.”

  That was it? That couldn’t be it. He had to have more to say than that. She wasn’t going to talk to her parents until Sunday night, and had managed to avoid the topic last week as they had gotten home so late. Why had he blown her off like that? Well, Naomi, why had be blown Naomi off? Had he told his family yet? I don’t think so, or mom would have been on the phone in a heartbeat.

  She couldn’t resist, she texted back, “it was so great to meet you, we had a really great time.”

  She could hear Tyr singing softly under his breath as he prepared them a snack. It wasn’t that late, but she thought Eric might be sleeping already and wouldn’t respond. Within seconds he replied “how was your trip back?”

  She replied “it was good, thanks.”

  “Can I be blunt?”

  “Yes, please.” She was dying to know what he’d say now.

  “I think we both know there wasn’t a connection, right?”

  “lol yeah, nothing,” she wrote back, even more curious. It was so unusual to come across a man who could articulate his feelings as well as Eric did.

  “I just wanted to let you know I’ll be telling your family that I’m not interested.”

  “That’s cool, me neither.” There, she was off the hook. She was proud of herself for following through with the conversation and finding out that all was good.

  “I need to ask you something, don’t take offense.”

  “Go ahead.”

  “It’s about your friend Naomi, is she single?” Haha not your type, she thought then paused. Wait a minute, he’s talking about me.

  “I think she has a boyfriend,” she replied, fighting the urge to throw the phone across the room. This is an odd turn of events, what is he getting at? she thought.

  “I think we had a connection, could you do some groundwork for me and find out?”

  “I don’t think you’re her type. lol”

  “I think I was, and she was definitely mine. Could you just help out?”

  “Ok, not a prob,” she was feeling the guilt now, she also felt a small smug satisfaction that he had felt the chemistry, maybe she was finally figuring this guy thing out, how to read them. Not that it was hard to pick up on that, he was so hot and there was such a sizzle when I talked to him.

  “Who’s on the phone babe?” Tyr asked as he came back to bed carrying a plate of food.

  Sarah jumped and said “Just Naomi, I’m letting her know I’m not coming home.” She reached for an apple slice and munched while she processed her lie. She was ashamed that she would deceive him, but she knew she needed to keep this attraction between her and Eric a secret, from Tyr and from anyone she knew.

  “Have a piece of brie,” Tyr said and held out a slice of cheese. She nibbled it from his fingers and soon the guilt of Eric was gone. When she was with Tyr, he was her everything. No other man could take away from her utter fascination with him, her lust and love and her delight in getting to know him and learn from him. Although, that crazy chemistry between her and Eric. Where had that come from? She let the thought drift away as she caught Tyr’s gaze, his face was open and love shone from his eyes. Her heart jumped and she forgot about the rest of the planet as she marveled at the wonder of finding him.

  CHAPTER TWENTY FIVE

  Sarah woke and sat up, panicked for a moment until she remembered where she was. Tyr was still sleeping, sprawled out with one arm above his head. He looked like a Greek statue, perfectly arranged on the sheets, as delicious as ever. Even more so now that he’s mine. She fought the urge to wake him up, choosing instead to drink in the sight of him, the rise and fall of his chest as he was away from her, deep in a dream. She heard the sound of rain against the window, another cold and wet day in Vancouver, but at least they didn’t have to shovel anything like they did back home with all the snow. Back home, shit I need to call them and let them know Eric isn’t suitable. Or was he going to do that? She couldn’t remember. She mentally added it to her ‘things that disappointment my parents’ list and vowed to bring it up on Sunday.

  Eric, she took this quiet time to mull over what was happening there. She knew Tyr was her love, soul mate if you want to go total old school cheese, but he really was. She saw his eyelashes flutter as Eric passed through her mind and wondered if he senses the competition somewhere deep in the recesses of his mind. Wouldn’t that be a glorious sight, she thought, the two of them, stripped down, throwing each other to the ground. Naomi’s dirty teachings had started to take root and develop. She noted with satisfaction that words like dick, cock and pussy were regular guests in her brain now.

  Ah Eric, she thought again, what am I going to do about you? She knew she should shake it off, but the memory of that inexplicable connection kept rearing its ugly head. Sarah reached over for her phone, she couldn’t remember a time it wasn’t an extension of her, when she forgot it somewhere it felt like a phantom limb. She would reflexively move to check her email only to find it gone. She had several texts, some from Naomi, she and Nic were apparently partying pretty hard last night...and yes, Sarah did mind if a few people crashed in her room. Ew, I hope that was a joke. The trouble with roommates, it was awesome when they could school you on the usage of the word cunt, but horrible if they let strangers go at it in your bed.

  The last text was a long one from Eric sent at 1:48 in the morning. “I don’t mean to sound like a stalker, but I can’t get Naomi out of my head. Just let her know how I feel, would you? This doesn’t mean I don’t want you in my life though, I have come to rely on our friendship and would like to continue where we were at before. “

  Sarah couldn’t suppress the smug feeling that she had been attractive to him. She glanced down at Tyr then read it again. Same reaction, but beyond that, nothing. She had a feeling that how she dealt with this right now was going to dictate how things played out between all of them. She made the deliberate decision to click her phone off, place it on the night stand, and turn towards Tyr. Eric is exciting, but this is all I need, she thought as she ran her hand down his sculpted body and found hi
s morning hard on, ready and waiting for her.

  *****

  Life with Tyr passed as though within a dream, Sarah almost felt like they were existing underwater, everything in the world seemed so far away. She had just a few short weeks until final exams in April, but her classes were all going well. Luckily Tyr still worked so she had some days to herself to stay on top of things. She loved her anthropology class, but wanted to take more courses in archaeology. She decided that Adam wasn’t going to influence her choices for next year. She also heard that he was returning to Vancouver Island, which helped if she had to admit it to herself. She saw him around the campus from time to time, he was always very friendly, sometimes she even detected a small sadness in his eyes at what had passed between them. She sometimes wondered if she had made a big deal over nothing. Tyr was not an unbiased observer, so she knew his input to the situation was going to be over the top. She’d sort it out herself at some point.

  Naomi and Nic were as crazy in love as ever, although Sarah still worried that Naomi was getting dragged into things beyond her experience. They both seemed to party way too much, but Nic was one of those people who could drink a bottle of gin and get up to write a midterm in the morning with blue birds chirping around her head and butterflies kissing her hands. Naomi...well, Naomi could drink 2 or 3 beers and end up looking like a disney villain, unkempt hair and dark circles under her eyes. The two girls were going to be spending the summer in Prince Rupert, they’d already found jobs in a coffee shop. Sarah hoped Nic’s parents would help them both straighten out. She wondered what would happen if Naomi ran into Eric though, what would he say when he found out their little switch?

  Her parents hadn’t laid off. The moment Eric’s family extended the news that he wasn’t interested in ‘Sarah’, they were looking for another match. Her father had become overbearing and she could practically hear her mom wringing her hands when she conveyed the information. Sarah feared they were going to force her into something over the summer and she dreaded going home. She wondered fleetingly if Tyr would let her crash at his place while she looked for work. She couldn’t afford the rent on the two bedroom on her own.