Sisters of the Heart - 03 - Forgiven

by Shelley Shepard Gray

  Or was he doing all this for Winnie, who he’d hardly known but had felt instantly drawn to?

  After all this time.

  Chapter 3

  “This place smells like the inside of a shanshtah,” Katie murmured as they stood in front of what was left of the barn three days after it had gone up in flames.

  “I wish it was only the chimney smell that concerned me,” Jonathan replied. “Unfortunately, the odor is the least of our worries.”

  Yes, the air around them most certainly held the scent of ashes, but the pungent odor was nothing compared to the destruction of his barn. Though it hadn’t burned completely down, more than half was gone. What remained looked so flimsy that it wasn’t worth the risk of keeping. The whole structure was going to need to be torn down, then rebuilt. “I don’t know how I’m going to set things to rights,” he added.

  “Luckily, you don’t have to do anything on your own. Both our families are eager to help, as is the rest of the community, English and Amish. We’re all praying, too, you know.”

  “I keep forgetting to count my blessings.” Thinking of Samuel Miller’s latest phone call, he said, “It is surely a blessing that Winnie is going to be better soon.”

  “When Anna and I visited her yesterday, she seemed almost like herself.”

  As he looked around at the extensive damage, Jonathan couldn’t help but shake his head in wonder. “It’s a blessing that all our animals came through this, too. We didn’t even lose a chicken.”

  “The Lord surely was looking out for us.” Katie laid a hand on his shoulder. “He’ll help us now, too, I think. And don’t forget, we’ve got each other.”

  “I never forget that,” he murmured as he shifted and turned to pull his wife into his arms. “Your love is my greatest blessing.”

  Yes, her love truly did warm his heart. On some mornings, when he woke to hear Katie already fussing in the kitchen, humming a tune, he could hardly believe they were now married.

  What a whirlwind their courtship had been, too! Less than a year ago he was a lonely widower, who’d gone to Katie’s home and asked if her parents could spare her for a time so she could help with Mary and Hannah while Winnie traveled to Indiana.

  At first, things had been difficult—neither he nor the girls had been especially welcoming to her at first. But as days turned to weeks, a love between them all had bloomed. Next thing he knew, they were planning a wedding. Now they were a family. Obviously, the Lord knew he needed someone special in his life.

  Together they entered the house, which was miraculously undamaged by either the fire from the barn or the water from the fire trucks. As soon as they entered the kitchen, Katie began to bustle about.

  He took a seat at the worn table and took a moment to watch her. As usual, she fussed like a busy bee, wiping down already clean counters, filling a teapot with water, then placing it on the gas-powered range to boil, and neatly folding two towels that the girls must have used earlier in the day. Finally, she laid a particularly pleasing cake in front of him. “I made a sour cream cake early this morning. I thought you might enjoy a slice while we make plans.”

  “And how did you know plans were going to need to be made?” He’d purposely been vague about his worries, knowing she would try to shoulder all of the burdens.

  She smiled as she picked up the knife and cut two generous pieces and placed them carefully on plates. “I heard the fire inspectors saying they’d be back today to visit with you. I guess we’re going to have a lot to think about.”

  Biting into the warm, moist cake, he paused for a moment, just enjoying the simple goodness of the treat. After he put his fork down, he said, “I’m worried, Katie. I’m worried about Winnie and the animals and rebuilding and finding the time to rebuild. But I’m also terribly worried about the cause of the fire. The inspector said the culprit was most likely a tossed cigarette. It just doesna make sense. Who would be smoking in my barn?”

  A dark shadow flickered across her face as she pushed her plate to one side. “Well, now. That is a difficult question. I’m not sure.”

  Something in her voice led Jonathan to believe that there was something she wasn’t saying. “But you must have an idea, right?”

  “Well…I might.”

  “Come now, Katie. Tell me what you think. Do you reckon it was maybe an English teen trying to find a place to get away?”

  “All I know is that it wasn’t me or you or Mary and Hannah.”

  Hastily swallowing his latest bite of cake, he looked at her frankly. Yes, his frau most certainly had an idea about the smoker in his barn. “Who do you think, Katie? I’m out of ideas. I’ve racked my brain, but for the life of me, I canna think of anyone who would even think of such a thing.”

  Reluctantly, she looked at him. “Maybe it was an Amish teenager,” she said quietly. “Maybe someone was having a little smoke and something went terribly wrong. An accident. I don’t think it was an Englischer teen. There are many other places to smoke and carry on besides an Amish farm. No…I reckon it was an Amish teen. An Amish boy or girl experimenting with smoking.”

  “That could never happen.” No member of the community would lurk around other people’s property. Besides, if it was someone who was Amish, he would have come forward and admitted his mistake.

  “Sure it could. We Amish aren’t perfect, you know. We all make mistakes time and again.”

  He pushed away his plate. It no longer looked appetizing. “Yes, but…”

  With a hard glare, she stopped his words. “Oh, honestly, Jonathan. Don’t be so naïve. I smoked. I experimented.”

  She was such a perfect wife he sometimes forgot her dark history. “Well, you’re the exception, Katie. I’m sure most Amish kinner don’t act out like you did.”

  “Like me?”

  “Jah, like you,” he fired back. “Your running-around years were difficult—you’ve said so yourself. Neither Winnie nor I ever did the things you’ve admitted to doing.”

  “I thought you said you understood about my past,” she said quietly. “I thought you forgave me.”

  “I have.” Feeling frustrated, Jonathan reached for her hand. “I’m not angry with you, I’m just sayin’ I don’t think an Amish teen burned down my barn.”

  In a huff, she stood up. “Well, I think differently, not that you seem to want to listen to my views. Now, excuse me while I go tend to the girls’ rooms.” Like a whirling dervish, Katie jumped to her feet, slapped the cake plate onto a counter with a thump, then swirled toward the front hallway.

  He called out to her before she disappeared completely. “Katie, what did I say?”

  Her feet slowed. “It’s not worth talking about.”

  “I think it is. I thought you were tryin’ to teach me how to be more open. To communicate better!”

  When she turned around, Jonathan noticed tears had filled her eyes. “Katie, please talk to me.”

  “Perhaps you could begin to listen with your ears and your heart. Don’t say one thing and mean another.”

  “I wasn’t doing that.”

  “I think you were. I think you said you forgave me, but you didn’t really mean it.”

  Her words caught him off guard. Had he done that?

  Before he could say a word, she spoke again. “Jonathan, perhaps you should do some thinking about whoever did this. The Bible asks us to forgive our sins, even those who sin against us. Are you going to be able to do that? Are you ever going to be able to really forgive whoever burned your barn, put your animals in danger, and sent your sister to the hospital?”

  He was prevented from pursuing the discussion by a brief hard rap at the door. “That’s the inspector,” he said.

  A flash of tenderness filled her gaze before she turned away. “You’d best go get the door, then.”

  After another hard rap, he opened the door to the fire inspector. “Good afternoon, Mr. Grisson.”

  “Mr. Lundy, hello. Want to come out to the barn? I’d like your opin
ion on some things.”

  “I’ll be right there,” he said quietly, just before he donned his black hat and followed the fire marshal outside. Katie had given him a lot to think about. And, most importantly, he had a feeling she was right. He wasn’t sure if he was ever going to be ready to forgive the person who trespassed and damaged his property.

  That was a terribly hard realization to come to terms with.

  Sam’s cell phone chimed late Sunday afternoon, just as he was about to drive over to the hospital and check on Winnie again.

  As soon as he answered, Eli spoke in a rush. “Samuel, I’m calling from the Brennemans’. I am worried about Caleb. Once again he is not here when he’s supposed to be.”

  “Maybe he simply forgot the time. You remember how it was when we were teens,” Sam said reasonably.

  “No, it’s more than that. I told him he needed to tend to his chores, no matter what else he did today. When I went out to the barn, the horses’ stalls still hadn’t been cleaned.”

  Now, that was worrisome. Their father had ingrained in all of them the importance of tending to responsibilities. He couldn’t imagine Caleb had been taught any different. “Eli, do you think he’s gotten into some kind of trouble?”

  “I’m not altogether sure.” Sounding weary, Eli added, “I was never interested in pushing boundaries like he is. Come to think of it, I was never too concerned with the outside world. And you, you just wanted to go to school.”

  That was a fair assumption. Learning had been his rebellion, and it had taken up a lot of his extra time. It had been a difficult and tough decision to discuss his desire to focus on learning instead of Amish life. “Learning how things worked was all I thought about. But Caleb isn’t like us, is he?”

  “He’s more secretive—and used to more freedoms. Remember how we always had the girls to look after?”

  “I never thought I’d ever be able to go anywhere without Beth,” Sam said.

  “I feel responsible, too, since Mamm and Daed are visiting our grandparents.”

  “When Daed comes back, you can speak to him.” With a jolt, Sam realized that, indeed, that was how it was going to be. He’d had little to no part in raising Caleb—the boy had been still a child when he’d left home. Though they were brothers, sometimes he felt as if he was little more than a distant relation.

  “One night last week…he came home drunk.”

  “All boys do that at least once, I imagine.” He’d taught at the college long enough to know a bit of experimental drinking was the norm instead of the exception.

  “I wonder…”

  Sam clutched the phone tighter. “What?”

  “It’s nothin’, just that…”

  “What, Eli?” Sam was really starting to feel alarmed.

  “Lord forgive me for even thinking this, but I don’t trust Caleb right now. I’m afraid…” He closed his eyes. “I’m afraid he was involved with the fire.”

  Sam felt as if someone had punched him in the stomach. “You think?”

  “I appreciate you not pushing off my fears. Samuel, ever since the fire, Caleb has seemed more withdrawn. He’s not offered to go with me to help clean up. In fact, every time I mention the fire, he looks like he wants to escape.” He cleared his throat. “Samuel, what are we going to do if it was Caleb who started the fire?”

  “I don’t know.” That would be a terrible situation. He didn’t know what he would do—or what he would say if Caleb found out that he and Eli suspected him of that.

  Both situations would be hard to excuse.

  “I won’t have a boy of mine lazing around from sunup to sundown,” his father called out from the buggy whose wheel he was repairing. “Get to work and stop your lolly-gagging.”

  David Hostetler hurried out to the barn, grabbed hold of his work gloves, and went where his daed had told him to go, to the back pasture. Weeds were threatening to choke the path to the pond creek. It was a sorry, awful job, pulling out weeds, cutting debris, then carting it away. As he tromped out, taking care to not step in the mud, he passed his two older brothers who were almost mirror images of their father.

  “What were you doing over there, just sitting around in the sun?” Kenny asked. “Daydreaming?”

  “No. I just lost track of time.”

  “You’d best start remembering or be prepared to be reminded,” Anthony said.

  Though Anthony was right, David didn’t comment on it. Instead, he tucked his head down and kept walking. There was nothing to say, and nothing anyone expected him to say. He was the middle child in a family of eight. He never seemed to stand out. At least, not in any good way.

  He picked up his pace. Finally, away from the prying eyes of his family, right next to the cool, trickling waters of Wishing Well Lake, he pulled off his glove.

  The burns were painful, the skin raw and blistered. Days in hot stiff leather gloves only served to make things worse. The only good thing about his current chores in the fields were that if he worked his hands raw, no one would question where he got the burns, they’d only tease him for having soft hands, not work-hardened and tough.

  But David would welcome that teasing, because it would mean that no one knew what he’d done. After slipping on his gloves, he grabbed hold of the scythe and swung the blade against the tall grasses.

  The sting was almost welcome. Anything was better than thinking about the fire.

  Chapter 4

  “We won’t have to delay our wedding, do you think?” Anna Metzger asked as soon as Henry joined her on the front porch of the Brenneman Bed and Breakfast. Gazing toward the horizon, where just a few miles away the Lundy farm was situated, she murmured, “Is it appropriate to say our vows with everyone still recovering from the fire?” Recalling the heartbroken expressions on Jonathan and Katie’s faces, she added, “Maybe we shouldn’t celebrate such happy things right now.”

  Henry looked at her with concern. “You sound as if more is bothering you than the troubles at the Lundy farm. Is there a reason you’re asking? Do you want to delay things?”

  “Not at all. We’ve already waited so long.”

  “That we have.”

  When Henry held out his hand, Anna took it with pleasure. The moment his fingers curved around hers, she recalled the first time they’d held hands. A spark of awareness had run through her body, making her realize happiness might actually be possible. It had been an astonishing moment…for a time, she’d been sure happiness would never find her again.

  Now, with his touch, warmth and comfort was in her life. Looking into his eyes, she shook her head. “I guess I just want everyone to be happy.”

  “I want that, too.”

  As they stepped down the four steps that led to the front porch, and walked along the neatly trimmed walkway to the surrounding gardens, Anna smiled. “I can’t help but be envious of Katie and Jonathan. As soon as they knew they wanted to get married, they went and said vows. It all happened within months.”

  “They had different circumstances. After all, Katie already was Amish.”

  “Well, I’m Amish now, too,” Anna said proudly. “And I think it is time I got married and was your wife.” After entering the garden, she stepped away from her fiancé and wandered down the rows of budding plants. This garden was a tremendous source of pride for her—until she’d come to live at the inn, she’d never tried to grow even a single tomato. Now Henry’s mother, Irene, entrusted her with much of the upkeep of the large garden.

  When she stopped at a row of fresh herbs, fragrant aromas filtered around them, the smell of thyme, rosemary, mint, and parsley lighting her senses. Unable to stop herself, she knelt down and pulled two pesky weeds. “I feel like I’ve been waiting forever.”

  Maneuvering among the rows far more slowly, Henry sniffed a batch of dusky purple lavender, plucked a stray dandelion, then tossed it into her pile. When Anna looked at him approvingly, Henry chuckled. “It’s just been a little over a year, Anna.”

  With a grimace,
she attacked two thistles that had the misfortune of daring to bloom in the midst of three heirloom tomato plants. “Just what I said. Forever.”

  “Hardly that.”

  “It feels like forever when you’re in love.”

  Pulling her hands back into the comfort of his own, he brushed his lips against her brow. “Oh, Anna. I love you, too. Now, don’t worry. I’ll make sure we won’t delay the wedding. Katie and Jonathan will understand.”

  She loved it when he told her he loved her—she knew she’d never get tired of hearing sweet things from him, of hearing how much he cared about her. “I hope Winnie will understand, too. When Katie and I visited her, she looked to be healing, but still in some pain.”

  “Jonathan saw her yesterday. He said she was sitting up in bed.”

  “That’s good. She must be feeling better.”

  “Jah—and listen to this—Samuel Miller called with news again last night. Winnie’s physicians reported last night that they will be discharging her soon. Maybe even in a day or two.” With a direct look, he said, “Then, of course, we’ll need to help her get around with that cast. I have a feeling she’s not going to want a few injuries to slow her down.”

  Just imagining Winnie attempt to do her usual routine with a cast on her foot made Anna smile. “You’re right about that. She’ll be warring with her injuries, for sure.” As Anna thought of Henry’s report, she mused, “So, Sam Miller was there again?”

  “Yes.”

  “It sure is nice he’s helping her so much at the hospital.”

  “It is.”

  Anna wished she knew more about what was going on between Winnie and Sam. When she and Katie had quizzed Winnie about him, her normally talkative friend had turned conspicuously closed-mouthed. “Have Sam and Winnie known each other a long time?”

  “Yes, all of us have known each other all our lives. Samuel and I are the same age, with Winnie just a few years behind. Eli Miller is twenty-eight. Katie is a bit younger than you, just twenty.”