Alex & Clayton

by John Simpson

  When they settled in for a few minutes, Alex looked Clay over again and smiled.

  “What?” Clay asked.

  “Nothing, just noticing how good you look this evening. You really have good taste in clothes.”

  “Oh, thanks. You look nice too. I brought a change of clothes for tomorrow so everything will be nice and fresh,” Clay said as he munched on carrot sticks.

  They chatted, ate, and sipped until it was time to leave for church. When they went out to the car, Alex opened the door for Clay and then ran around and jumped in the driver’s seat all smiles.

  “What are you smiling about?” Clay asked.

  “I had an idea for New Year’s Eve. Wanna hear it?”

  “Should I be afraid?” Clay asked with a laugh.

  “Not at all! You like the Blue Moon, right? I think you told me you had a date there.”

  “Yeah, if that’s what you wanna call it. But yes, I did have dinner there, why?”

  “The Blue Moon is having a big New Year’s Eve party with an open bar, music, dancing, dinner, and at midnight a champagne toast. Then they’re serving breakfast at 2 a.m. if anyone is still there, and I’m sure there will be. Whatcha think?”

  “Is it formal? Do we get to dress up?”

  “I don’t know, but I can sure check on it. You have a tux?”

  “Of course, doesn’t everyone?” Clay asked, laughing.

  “No, but many gay men seem to. I have one that I haven’t worn in a while. Tell you what, let’s go. I’ll get tickets, and we’ll dress up in tuxes? Whatcha say?”

  “Hell, why not? Better than sitting around watching that same stupid ball drop on Times Square and then going to bed. But, let me pay for my own ticket, okay?”

  “No, my idea, my treat. You can do something nice for me another time.”

  Clay thought about it and decided what the hell. “Okay, it’s another date. Could be a lot of fun, and I imagine we’ll get to meet more of the permanent gay residents of the town.”

  As they pulled into the parking lot of the church, snow began to fall.

  “Oh, can you believe this? Snow! On Christmas Eve! Did you write this into the script or something?” Clay asked with a smile.

  “I wish, but it’s more like there’s plenty of moisture from the ocean to make snow when the temperature is right,” he replied as they entered a nearly full church.

  AFTER church, they found a light dusting of snow covering their car and the streets. They drove home without problem as Alex was more than used to driving in deep snow, let alone a dusting of the white stuff.

  Both men were in a great mood when they entered the house. Alex turned on the Christmas tree, and together they brought out the food that had been prepared, along with drinks. As promised, Alex put on the television, and they searched for an old Christmas movie. Clay practically squealed with delight when they found the original version of A Christmas Carol just beginning to run.

  “I love this movie! I’ve watched it on Christmas Eve dozens of times, and I never get tired of it.”

  “Good, I’m glad this brings back good memories for you. I’ve always enjoyed this movie, too, but I haven’t seen the original, so this will be a first for me,” he said as he took a sip of his drink and pulled Clay against him on the sofa.

  Clay didn’t resist the bodily contact and in fact, he was so engrossed in the movie that Alex doubted he even realized it had happened. As Clay remained transfixed on the screen, Alex studied his profile and liked what he saw more and more. Was it possible that he was becoming overly attracted to this man? After all, in the past, he would have banged Clay’s brains out and moved onto the next one, but he had no desire to repeat history now.

  Finally, Clay seemed to feel the eyes boring into his soul, and he turned to look at Alex.

  “Everything okay? You don’t hate the movie, do you?”

  “No, everything is more than fine, and yes, I do like the movie. They really did a wonderful job of depicting London during that time period,” Alex responded and looked at the television screen. “Have some more food. I don’t want a lot left over.”

  Clay scooped up more of the various snack foods and was instantly back to the screen, making Alex smile. His arm was still around Clay, and he didn’t say a word. When the movie credits began to roll, Clay finally sat back and sighed.

  “That was nice. Now I really feel like it’s Christmas. Speaking of which, I have something for you in my bag. Can I go get it now?”

  “Clay, you didn’t have to do that. Now you’ve embarrassed me!” Alex feigned.

  “Never mind that, I’ll be right back,” Clay said as he got up and went up the stairs.

  Meanwhile, Alex opened a side drawer in the end table and withdrew a wrapped present.

  When Clay came back down, he was all smiles. “This is just a little something I saw and thought of you,” he said as he handed Alex the present.

  “Thank you. And this is something that I saw and thought of you,” Alex said, handing the hidden present to Clay, who blushed and mumbled something about “You didn’t….”

  Both men opened their presents with deliberate intent, instead of wildly ripping off the paper like they wanted to. They chose the mature route instead of the kid route.

  “Oh, it’s beautiful! Thank you!” Alex said as he opened the box and took out a dress watch by Michael Kors. “I don’t know what to say!”

  “Oh! Very nice, thank you! Believe it or not, this is one thing I’ve never bought for myself or received as a present. Thank you!” Clay said as he removed the sparkling gold chain from its box and put it on.

  “Here, let me help you with that clasp,” Alex said as he reached up and hooked the chain behind Clay’s neck. “It looks great,” he said.

  “What a wonderful Christmas Eve this has been,” Clayton proclaimed.

  “With you here, it’s been wonderful for me also,” Alex said softly.

  Chapter Nine

  AFTER finishing their last glasses of wine, both men went to bed. Each man lay awake for a while thinking about the other and what a great time they had just had. Alex found himself erect, and he wanted very much to go to Clay’s room and make love to him, but resisted, remembering he’d promised Clay he wouldn’t try anything if he stayed the night.

  AN UNSEEN smile adorned Clay’s face as he thought about what it would be like to have sex with Alex. Clay admitted to himself that he was attracted to his friend, but didn’t want to take the chance of being rejected or used for one night of sex and then discarded. He’d rather have Alex as a long-time friend rather than a quick release of passion.

  ALEX woke first, went down to the kitchen, put coffee on, and pulled out plates. He turned the oven on to let it warm up before putting in a very large, stuffed turkey. The smell of the brewing coffee woke Clay up, and he got out of bed. He stretched, brushed his teeth, combed his hair, and went downstairs wearing a T-shirt and pajama bottoms.

  “Good morning!” Clay said, as he entered the kitchen.

  “Good morning to you. You could have stayed in bed for at least another hour, ya know? I’m up because I have to get the turkey on and make sure I haven’t forgotten anything. Need to set the table and all that. Want some coffee?”

  “Sure do. Look, I really don’t mind helping you with this dinner today. I wish you’d let me. Otherwise, I’m gonna be sitting around doing nothing until you can take a break.”

  “If you’re sure, you can help, but really, I never ask guests to do anything other than have a good time.”

  “That’s settled, then. Hmm, coffee smells great. I wanted to tell you before the day gets rolling what a great time I had last night. It was the first Christmas Eve I’ve ever spent alone with a man who was my friend. The whole night was terrific.”

  “I’m happy to hear that. I hope today is also good for you. My friends are a bit crazy, but you’ll like them.”

  As Clay and Alex sat down at the breakfast bar, Clay said, “So, tell me someth
ing about the guys who are coming today.”

  “Sure. First of all, they’re all cops, which by definition makes them a little crazy. I had a crush on one of them a few years ago, and we had a torrid affair for about six months. In the end, it didn’t work because we were both trying to be the alpha male in the relationship. The other guys are straight, former co-workers, single, two divorced. Being a cop is hard on a marriage, and many end in court.”

  “Do the other guys know you’re gay?”

  “Yeah, I came out to them about five years ago. At first, they gave me a lot of shit about it, but then they remembered that we’d been friends for a long time, and I was the same guy I’d always been, just gay. They’ve even met a few of my boyfriends along the way. The boyfriends were usually around only long enough to meet them once or twice. I care about those friends, not just Adam, my ex.”

  “So, I can be myself then?”

  “Of course! I wouldn’t ask you to pretend to be something you’re not, regardless of who was coming,” Alex answered seriously.

  “I’ve had a lifetime of practice at pretending, so I’m not used to just being who I am.”

  “Why is that? Why did you pretend to be something you’re not? I can’t imagine living like that.”

  “Well, I told you a little about it. My parents would have been crushed if they knew, though they wouldn’t have loved me less. They just really wanted grandchildren from me, and my mother was counting on that until the day she died. Also, friends of my parents fell into two categories: stuck-up assholes that would’ve freaked out if they knew, and people who were in church five times a week. They all would have been trying to save my soul and all that. I wasn’t prepared to deal with either group.

  “At work, it wasn’t really an issue. I didn’t need to tell my co-workers at the library simply because it wasn’t pertinent to anything. While others talked about their boyfriends and girlfriends and wives and husbands, I just kept quiet. What was I gonna do? Tell them about my escapades in New York City bookstores?”

  “Still, it must have been tough to live that way. Like you said, while others were talking about their other halves, you remained silent. Since there was no one, you couldn’t even have a picture on your desk of someone that you loved or loved you. We’ve made a lot of progress in the gay community, but there are still many men and women like you who are searching for a way out of the closet,” Alex said.

  “And you, who should have been in the closet totally, lived your life fairly freely as a gay man—even to the point that other cops knew about you. It seems to me our lives should have been switched.”

  “Clay, there’s no reason whatsoever for you to remain hidden in the closet. You’ll soon be fifty, and I’ll be right behind you, and it’s now or never, buddy. Don’t you long for a boyfriend or husband?”

  “Of course I do! But opportunity and timing never allowed for it. You’re right in saying there isn’t a reason now that I couldn’t pursue a man. I’m getting to that point in life where I’m about ready to take that step, if I can just find someone who likes what he sees in me.”

  “Who knows, maybe you’ve already met that man and just haven’t realized it,” Alex said as he got up and put the turkey in the pre-heated oven. “You can set the table if you like so we don’t have to do it later. Use the china in the china closet and set places for six people.”

  As the day wore on, Alex and Clay continued to talk about living life as a gay person and dissecting both the benefits and pitfalls. Both men agreed that neither had chosen to be gay but felt they were born gay. The hours passed, and it was almost noon. The turkey had been checked and basted, and it was time to get ready for company.

  “Why don’t we take our showers and get dressed for dinner?” Alex suggested. “I expect the guys in about ninety minutes, and everything is on schedule food-wise.”

  “Sounds good to me. I’ll head up now,” Clay said.

  Before going up to his bathroom to shower, Alex looked out the front window and saw that it was once again snowing lightly. It made for a beautiful sight, and he bent down and turned on the Christmas tree before he ran up to his bedroom. He stripped off his clothes and hopped into the shower, shaving while he was in there.

  Once dried off, he dressed, checked himself in the mirror, and liked what he saw. As he left his bedroom, Clay came out of the guest room, and both men looked each other up and down, pleased at how nice the other looked.

  “Damn, Clay, you look good enough to eat!”

  “Yeah? Well, you look like you just stepped outta some magazine like GQ or something.”

  “I’ll take that as a compliment,” Alex said and smiled as he went down the steps with Clay right behind him.

  Clay found himself studying the way Alex’s ass shifted from side to side with each step and smiled. He wondered if he had the courage to find out what making love with Alex was like.

  “It’s snowing!” Clay shouted out as he noticed the snow for the first time.

  “Yeah, how ’bout that? It sure makes the Christmas spirit come alive, don’t it?”

  “Everything has a covering of white now. It’s so beautiful! Will this cause any trouble for your friends?”

  “Nah, my boys are used to driving in two feet of snow, let alone, what? A half inch?” Alex responded.

  “That’s what it looks like. Anything else I can do for now?”

  “Yep. Check to make sure the bar setup has everything we need: glasses and the other stuff. I’m going to baste the turkey and start cooking the potatoes. They should be here in about an hour now. By the way, it’s after noon. If you wanna glass of wine or a drink, make yourself at home.”

  “Okay, thanks. Can I fix you anything?”

  “Yeah, pour me a glass of that chilled white wine please. The Riesling, not the Chardonnay.”

  After looking over the bar setup and finding that nothing was missing, Clay poured two glasses of wine and brought them into the kitchen.

  “Here ya go. I’ll just sit here for now and watch you cook,” Clay said as he ogled Alex’s ass some more.

  Once the potatoes were in, Alex joined Clay at the breakfast bar.

  “Here’s to a great Christmas and to new friends,” Alex said in a toast.

  They touched glasses, took a sip, and set them down.

  “What are you staring at?” Clay asked.

  “You. You look really nice today, and I’m excited that you’re gonna get to meet my friends from DC. This is one dinner I’m really looking forward to!”

  “Yeah, I imagine it would be nice to have old friends in for dinner… friends you have a history with and not just someone new like me. You’re a lucky man.”

  “Hey, you’re just as important to me as my old friends. A friend is a friend. You need to stop putting yourself down and realize you have a lot to offer. You being single just doesn’t make sense.”

  “You’re single, aren’t you?

  “Yeah, I am, but I’ve had many affairs in the past. I just haven’t started playing the field again, but I will.”

  The doorbell rang, and Alex jumped up. “They’re early!” he said as he ran to the front door.

  Clay waited for a minute so it didn’t look like the missus came out to greet them at the same time as the man of the house.

  Alex saw his friends through the window and yanked open the door as soon as he got to it.

  “Hey, you old bastards! Come on in. Am I glad to see you boys!” Alex yelled.

  His welcome was met by a chorus of “Merry Christmas!”

  They all hugged, and Clay made his entrance when he thought it was appropriate. “Hello all. Merry Christmas,” he said.

  “Boys, let me introduce you to a new friend I’ve made down here. He owns the local bookstore, and since it’s the only one in town, it pays to know him! Okay, first, this is Adam, the one I told you about, and this is Mike, Brian, and Don. Guys, this is Clayton. Be nice to him or I’ll bite!” Alex warned with a laugh.

&nb
sp; “Nice to meet you all, and especially on Christmas. Alex has told me a lot about you,” Clay said.

  “Yeah? Did he tell you he wanted to fuck me for years and never did fulfill that fantasy?” Don asked.

  The other guys hooted and hollered, and Alex retorted, “In your wildest dreams, pumpkin!”

  They all laughed again.

  “Come on, guys, put your coats over there and help yourself to the bar. We’ll be eating in about an hour,” Alex said as he left for the kitchen. Since the guys were early, he decided to go ahead and move up the schedule.

  “This is some house you got here, Alex. Very nice,” Adam said. “Maybe I should have stayed with you and let you be the boss!”

  “Well, don’t you always take the bottom role anyway, Adam?” Brian asked.

  “Only one way to find out, stud,” Adam replied, which was followed by more laughter.

  Everyone made a drink and sat down in the living room.

  “Did you guys have any problem with the roads at all?” Clay asked.

  “What? This?” Mike asked pointing out the window. “We didn’t even hit snow until about an hour out from Rehoboth. This is nothing.”

  Alex walked into the room with a drink and sat down on the sofa next to Clay.

  “So tell us how you like retirement,” one of the guys said.

  “Loving it, so far. I’ll admit, some days I get a little bored, but overall, I go to bed when I want to, get up when I want to, and have all the time in the world to read. With Clay and his bookstore, I have a never-ending supply of books and porn mags. What else could I want?”

  They all laughed again as good smells from the kitchen began to waft out into the living room.

  “Damn that smells good,” Mike said. “It’s making me hungry as hell!”

  “We’ll eat in about an hour. You guys are early, remember?” Alex replied.

  “Yes we are, and that’s because I saw the weather forecast for this area, and I didn’t know what to expect with the predicted snow, so we left an hour earlier than we had originally planned. Didn’t wanna be late for the ole captain’s Christmas dinner!” Mike answered.