I'll Bury My Dead

by James Hadley Chase

  “I guess you did, but I thought I’d stay on until you were ready to go.”

  “I don’t know what I’d do without you, Lois,” English said, standing beside her and looking down at her glossy dark head. “If I had come out and found you gone, I guess I’d have felt like a man with no arms.”

  She smiled, pleased.

  “It wouldn’t have been as bad as that, Mr. English. Is there anything I can do?”

  “See if you can get Ed Leon on the phone. He’s in Chicago some place. I don’t know his number.”

  “I’ll get him for you,” Lois said, and turned briskly to the switchboard.

  English went back to his office and closed the door. He began to pace up and down, his face thoughtful. Ten minutes later, his telephone rang and he picked up the receiver.

  “Mr. Leon’s on the line now, Mr. English,” Lois told him.

  “Good girl. Put him on, will you?”

  There was a click, and English said, “That you, Ed?”

  “Well, if it isn’t, some other louse is wearing my suit,” a voice said in his ear. “You’re interrupting a session with a blonde. It’s taken me two solid months to persuade her to come up and look at my etchings, and now you have to bust in at the psychological moment. What’s on your mind?”

  “I want you,” English said. “Catch the first plane out tomorrow morning. I have a job for you that’s right up your street.”

  “I don’t want a job. I want to be left in peace,” Leon said, his voice alarmed. “If that’s all you want I’ll hang up before this frill breaks her way out with an axe.”

  “I said I want you,” English snapped. “This is a big job, Ed. Something right up your street or I wouldn’t have called you. When you reach town, give me a call. I’ll meet you somewhere. I don’t want anyone to know you and I are working together. Do you understand?”

  “Not a word,” Leon said, sighing, “but if it’s like that, I guess I’ll have to do something about it. Is there any money in it for me?”

  “Five grand,” English said.

  Leon gave a long, low whistle.

  “The buzzing you hear in your ears is my helicopter landing on your roof,” he said excitedly and hung up.

  CHAPTER THREE

  I

  J ULIE HAD LONG AGO learned never to keep English waiting, so she was dressed and ready to leave when he telephoned to tell her their movie date was off.

  When he hung up, she slowly replaced the receiver, and stood staring at her reflection in the mirror above the mantel. Absently she told herself that she was looking at her best, and the green scarf she had knotted at her throat set off her eyes and her copper-colored hair with even more effect than she had imagined.

  She was also pleased with the way her light camel-hair coat accentuated the width of her shoulders, and looking down, she thought her new reverse calf shoes made her feet look even smaller than they were.

  English had said he would have dinner with her at the club at nine o’clock. She looked at her strap watch. It was now fifteen minutes past six. She had nearly two hours before she joined him.

  She picked up the telephone and dialled English’s office.

  Lois answered, and Julie’s mouth tightened. She disliked Lois intensely. Anyone could see Lois was in love with English, except English himself, but then he would never notice a thing like that. The way Lois allowed English to make her his tame slave infuriated Julie. Besides, Julie knew Lois also disliked her. She was sure that Lois considered she wasn’t good enough for English, and whenever they met, Lois always seemed able to make Julie feel uncomfortable. Her cool, serene eyes seemed to be saying, “You have nothing to be proud of. You only sleep with him, any good-looking, brainless woman could do that, but I work with him and I help him, and I have known him much, much longer than you have.”

  “Oh, Lois, this is Julie,” Julie said brightly. “Is Harry there? I wanted some tickets for the show.”

  “Yes, he’s here,” Lois returned, her voice cold. “Hold on a moment, Miss Clair.”

  It was always “Miss Clair,” although Julie had repeatedly asked Lois to call her by her Christian name.

  There was a click on the line, and Harry’s voice said, “Hello, Julie. I was just going. Anything I can do?”

  “I want two tickets for the show on Saturday, Harry,” Julie said, trying to speak calmly. “I was going to ask Nick to bring them, but our date’s off. He won’t be free until nine o’clock, and I’m meeting these people before then. Can you leave them at Nick’s club, and I’ll pick them up?”

  “Of course. I’ll be glad to. I’m on my way home now. I’ll put them in an envelope for you with your name on it.”

  “Thanks so much, Harry,” Julie said, and hung up.

  Moving quickly, she picked up her handbag and gloves and left the apartment. She rode down in the elevator, and asked the night porter to get her a taxi. While she waited, she lit a cigarette, and was annoyed to see her hands were shaking.

  “Where to, madam?” the night porter asked, coming into the lobby.

  “The Athletic Club.”

  He opened the taxi door, put his hand on her arm to help her in, and told the driver where to go.

  The taxi made fast time through the evening traffic, and as the driver was about to turn into Western Avenue, Julie leaned forward and said, “I’ve changed my mind. Drive me to 5th and 27th Street, please.”

  “Okay, miss,” the driver said, and looked over his shoulder at her, grinning. “My old man always said it’s because dames change their minds so often that they’ve got cleaner ones than us men.”

  “He’s probably right,” Julie said, and laughed.

  After ten minutes’ fast driving, the driver slowed down and pulled up.

  “Here we are, miss.”

  Julie paid him, thanked him, and set off briskly along a quiet, dimly lit street that eventually led to the river. Every so often, she glanced over her shoulder, but the street was deserted, and she saw no one. Suddenly she slowed her pace, stopped and turned.

  She looked quickly to the right and left, then up at the dark buildings opposite. Satisfied that no one was watching her, she went down a narrow, dimly lit alley that led to the waterfront.

  A thin white mist was coming off the river, and as she moved along in the dark shadows, a tugboat’s siren hooted dismally from the other side of the river.

  Again she paused; again she looked to the right and left, then she stepped into the doorway of a tall, narrow building, pushed open the door and stepped into a dark lobby. She moved without hesitation through the darkness as if she had been here so often she knew exactly where to go.

  She heard a door open near her.

  “Julie?”

  “Yes.”

  She stepped into a dark room, and the door closed behind her. Then the lights sprang up, and she turned, smiling, as Harry Vince caught her in his arms.

  “What a bit of luck, darling,” he said. “I was resigning myself to a dull evening. I thought he was taking you to the movies.”

  She put her arms around his neck, and pressed her face against his.

  “Sam turned up at the last moment,” she said. “Oh, Harry, it seems such a long time. Kiss me.”

  Harry kissed her, holding her to him while his heart hammered against his side.

  “We have such a little time, darling,” she said, pulling back and looking up at him. “Don’t let’s talk now. Don’t let’s waste a minute.”

  “I’ve been waiting as impatiently as you for this moment, too,” Harry said. “Let me take your coat. There’s a fire in the other room. Let’s go in there.”

  She slipped out of her coat and going ahead of him entered the comfortable bedroom where a blazing fire greeted her. The room was lit only by the warm orange flames, casting shadows and firelight, giving the room an intimate atmosphere she had grown to love.

  “Don’t turn on the light, Harry.”

  He closed the door and leaned against it, watc
hing her. It fascinated him to see how quickly she slipped out of her clothes. She pulled a zip here and a zip there, and in a moment she was standing naked and lovely before him.

  “Julie, you are the most beautiful thing,” he said with a catch in his voice.

  She knelt by the fire, her back to him, her hands going out toward the blaze.

  “Only you can say that to me, Harry, and make me believe it.”

  He went over to her, and kneeling beside her, slipped his arm around her, turning her and pulling her against him.

  “These are the only moments I live for,” he said. “It’s as if the world has stood still, and only you and I are left alive.”

  She looked up at him, her arms slid around his neck, and pulling his head down, she crushed her mouth against his.

  The clock on the mantel struck eight, and Julie half sat up.

  “Don’t move, darling,” Harry said out of the darkness, and his arm went around her. “You have an hour yet.”

  “No, only half an hour. I mustn’t keep him waiting.”

  “Julie, we can’t go on and on like this,” Harry said, his face against hers. “Can’t you talk to him? Can’t you tell him you don’t want to go on with him anymore?”

  He felt her stiffen, and there was a note of alarm in her voice when she said, “Why, Harry, what are you saying? Nick would never give up. You know that. Besides, how would we live? Don’t let’s go over this again. You know it never gets us anywhere.”

  “But this is dangerous. If he ever found out…”

  “He won’t find out,” Julie said.

  “But he may. He’s no fool. For all we know he suspects us now.”

  “Of course he doesn’t. Why, tonight, he even suggested you should take me to the movies.”

  “Good Lord! What did you say?”

  “I told him I didn’t want to go to the movies with anyone but him.”

  Harry remained silent for a moment. He stared across the room at the flames of the fire that cast dancing shadows on the ceiling.

  “If he ever found out,” he said, voicing a fear that had been haunting him for weeks, “he’d kill us. He wouldn’t stop to think. He’d kill us first and let Crail fix it afterward.”

  “Oh, darling, you’re talking nonsense,” Julie said, touching his face. “Nick wouldn’t do a thing like that. He’s far too wrapped up in his own career to risk ruining it. Why, he told me he wants the hospital named after him. Of course he wouldn’t.”

  Harry wasn’t convinced.

  “I’m not so sure. If he caught us…”

  “But he won’t. Please don’t be silly about this, Harry. He won’t find out—not now.”

  Harry half sat up.

  “What do you mean—not now?”

  “Now Roy’s dead.”

  “What’s Roy got to do with us?”

  She hesitated, then speaking rapidly as if to force out the words, she said, “Roy knew. He’s been blackmailing me for the past six months.”

  Harry stiffened, and cold fear clutched at his heart. He realized then how frightened he was of English, and how much he dreaded English finding out that Julie and he were lovers.

  He got off the bed and slipped on a dressing gown, then he turned on a shaded lamp.

  “Roy knew about us?” he repeated, and in the light of the lamp Julie saw he had gone white.

  She turned on her side, her hands covering her breasts.

  “Yes, he knew. Now he’s dead I can tell you.”

  Harry felt sick.

  “Why didn’t you tell me before?” he said, his voice going up a note.

  “I was frightened of losing you. I know how you feel about Nick. I understand it. If you thought Roy knew, you might have stopped seeing me, and I couldn’t have borne that, Harry.”

  Harry moved over to a cellarette and poured himself a stiff whisky. His hand was unsteady.

  “Will you have one?” he asked, suddenly realizing he should have asked her before pouring his own.

  “No, darling. Don’t look like that. It really is all right now Roy’s dead.”

  Harry drank the whisky, then lit a cigarette and came over and sat on the bed. He gave Julie a cigarette, and not trusting his shaking hand, he dropped the lighter beside her.

  “When did it happen? You say he was blackmailing you?”

  She nodded as she lit the cigarette.

  “It’s been hell, Harry. I thought I’d go out of my mind. One day, Roy came to see me. It must have been six or seven months ago. I couldn’t understand why he should have come. As you know, I scarcely knew him. He didn’t beat about the bush. He said, “You are to come to my office every Friday with two hundred dollars, Julie. I can’t make you come, of course, but I can tell Nick you’re having an affair with Harry Vince. Are you going to pay me or am I to tell Nick?” That’s all there was to it. I was so frightened I didn’t even ask him how he had found out. I said I would pay, and every Friday since then I’ve paid.”

  “The louse!” Harry said furiously, clenching his fists. “So it is true. They’re saying he was a blackmailer. The dirty, rotten louse!”

  “You can’t imagine how relieved I was when Nick told me he had shot himself,” Julie said. “It’s been a nightmare these past months. Having to go to that beastly little office and hand him the money while he sat at his desk and grinned at me, and that cheap bitch of a girl of his grinning at me, too.”

  Harry was scarcely listening. His mind was seething with alarm.

  “Do you think he told Corrine?” he asked. “Suppose she goes to Nick?”

  “Why should he tell her?” Julie said a little impatiently. “It wasn’t anything to be proud of. Besides, Corrine would have told Nick before now if Roy had told her. I’m sure only he and that girl of his knew, and they’re both dead. I’m sure of it, Harry. I wouldn’t have told you, but if you only knew what a relief it is to tell someone.”

  “You poor darling,” Harry said, taking her in his arms. “You should have told me before. Anyway, I’m going to pay you back. How much did he get out of you?”

  “Please, Harry, I don’t want to talk about it. I managed with the money I earned. Let’s forget it.” She slid off the bed. “I’ve got to get dressed.”

  “But I can’t let you lose all that money,” Harry protested.

  “Don’t let’s talk about it,” Julie said. “It’s paid, and I’ve forgotten it. So, please, Harry…”

  Harry began to pace up and down.

  “Julie, can’t we run away together?” he asked abruptly. “Must we go on taking these risks? It’s not as if he’s married to you.”

  She paused with one stocking on and the other in her hand, her eyes wary.

  “What would happen to us? Nick’s so powerful. I’d never get another engagement, and you’d never get another job. He would see to that. He’s so ruthless and possessive. He’d find us, and he’d make our lives miserable for the rest of our days. Let’s be patient, Harry. Let’s be thankful we can see each other like this from time to time. Something may turn up. Don’t let’s do anything silly and dangerous.”

  “But this is even more dangerous,” Harry said. “We’re cheating him now, but if we went away together, he couldn’t accuse us of that.”

  “He would find us, Harry. He would never let me go.”

  “He’s not God,” Harry said. “I know he’s pretty powerful, but damn it! He couldn’t stop me earning a living. That’s nonsense, Julie.”

  Julie slipped into her dress, put on her shoes and crossed over to the dressing table. She sat down and began to make up her face.

  “Say something, Julie,” Harry said anxiously. “Don’t you see this is even more dangerous than going away?”

  She turned and faced him.

  “All right, Harry, I’ll tell you the truth. For weeks now I knew we should have told Nick and gone away together, but I can’t face it. I can’t give up all the things that mean so much to me. I don’t suppose you’ve ever thought what it means to
me to have Nick behind me. If it wasn’t for Nick I wouldn’t be singing at the best night club in town. I wouldn’t have that lovely penthouse or all the clothes I’ve got. I wouldn’t have accounts at all the big stores. I wouldn’t be able to buy what I like when I like without thinking of where the money is coming from. I wouldn’t have all the important men in town fawning round me wherever I go. I wouldn’t have the car I’ve got. If I walked out on Nick, I’d walk into a different life, and I wouldn’t like it.”

  Harry winced and sat down. He stared into the fire, his right fist grinding into the palm of his left hand.

  “I see,” he said in a flat, tired voice. “No, I hadn’t thought of it quite like that, Julie.”

  “I want my cake and I want to eat it,” Julie said, not looking at him. “I love you, Harry, more than any other man on earth. Sometimes I wish I had never met you. I wish I had never fallen in love with you. It would have saved so much pain and worry and cheating. But I did meet you and I did fall in love with you, so there it is. You have got to take me as I am or leave me. Now you know the truth, Harry, you’d better tell me if you want to see me again. I wouldn’t blame you if you now hate the sight of me, as I hate the sight of myself. I know I’m selfish, grasping and dishonest. I’m the worst kind of a bitch, but I can’t help it. I would do anything for you, except give up the life Nick gives me. I don’t suppose you’d believe that, but I would. I would even keep away from you if you wanted me to, and that would be the hardest thing of all I’d do for you.”

  Harry got up and went over to her; bending, he lifted her face and kissed her.

  “I’m not going to give you up, Julie. You mean too much to me for that. All right, darling, we’ll go on as we’ve gone on. Perhaps one day, something will turn up, and we can be together for good.” He forced a little laugh. “Who knows? One of these days I may be as rich and as powerful as English is. If he could do it, why can’t I?”

  Julie got to her feet and clung to him.

  “Darling Harry, I love you so, and I’ll try to make you happy. Be patient. I’m sure it’ll come right in the end. Now, darling, I must go. I’ll come again as soon as I can. Get my coat, will you? I’m going to be late if I don’t hurry.”