Arizona Skies: The Muse

by S. Cruz

  “You OK?” Jesse asked as I shivered in the cool night air.

  “That change from day to night gets me every time,” I confessed, snuggling into him.

  “I know; it’s almost surreal!” he said.

  “Surreal is a good way to describe it,” I said.

  “You know, there was a time that I never would have taken the time to appreciate what we just witnessed. You have woken up my senses, and through your eyes I finally see the beauty of the world around me. I can’t believe how you’ve changed my life, sweetheart; I want you to know that. Life has a new meaning, words just flow out of me now, and I have you to thank for that,” he said, smiling at me.

  “I second that,” John said, watching us.

  “We all thank you, Bailey,” Keith said, holding Liza close to him.

  “You should see some of the lyrics he has written; we are going to be working day and night when we get back to put music to his words. The producer is thrilled with the feedback I’ve been giving him. I have a good feeling about this album. I certainly hope you and Shelly make that trip out in February,” John said.

  “We’ll be there, we’re making arrangements as soon as we get back,” Shelly said.

  “I’m going to miss you so much,” Jesse said, stroking my cheek.

  “Hell, we all are,” Scott said, squeezing Shelly.

  “I feel like I have a new family,” I said to John.

  “You do, and we will be there for you,” John said.

  “See, everyone loves you, Bailey; remember that,” Jesse said, touching my nose with a wink.

  Shelly, Liza, and I waited as the band tuned up and went over the playlist. We were brought a round of drinks and relaxed at our front-row table, watching our men collaborating on tonight’s performance. I noticed that more tables had been squeezed into the room, anticipating the crowd that would be there for the final performance. Spirits were high as we talked and drank, watching the women pour into the lounge fighting to get front-row tables. It was a preview of what was to come for this band; I had no doubt in my mind that they were going to be famous.

  The room came alive with excitement as waitresses scurried around the room to take orders and deliver drinks. The curtain came down when I looked back toward the stage. The noise level escalated as the lights dimmed, and the announcer walked on stage. My heart was beating double time as I realized I was just as excited as the people that filled the room.

  “Welcome to the Green Room,” the announcer said, looking out into the audience. Everyone started clapping and yelling. I heard whistles and shouting coming from behind me. It was very exciting, and I wondered how Jesse and the guys could stay so calm listening to the excitement in the room.

  “It’s my great pleasure to introduce, for the last time, Arizona Skies,” he said, walking off the stage. The screams were deafening as the curtain went up, revealing this incredible band standing on that stage. Jesse had his back to the audience with his hand in the air. He counted to four, then turned to take the few steps to the microphone.

  They started their first set with Foreigner’s “Head Games” and “Waiting for A Girl like You,” which got to me every time he sang it. The sound of Jesse’s raspy voice with Scott and Keith singing backup behind him filled the room. I sat back, just watching my sexy boyfriend perform like he was born to it. He looked so relaxed and happy as he held that microphone in his hand and crossed back and forth across the stage. They transitioned right into the Dooby Brothers’ “Without Love,” which, with the heavy dance beat, had everyone on their feet. The room was alive with the beat John was pounding out. Scott’s high-pitched voice and the heavy guitar solo really showed off his musical talent.

  They switched to newer songs next, “To Close to Love You,” by Alex Clare, and “Am I Wrong,” by Nico & Vinz. Jesse backed up for the next song, and the spotlight fell on Scott. Scott was playing the keyboard and started singing Sam Smith’s “I Know I’m Not the Only One.” His higher-pitched voice was perfect for that song. I reached over to hold Shelly’s hand as his beautiful voice started singing the lyrics, so crystal clear. There wasn’t a sound in the room. He sang it beautifully, pitch perfect; I was impressed. Shelly had tears in her eyes listening to him; I came prepared and handed her a tissue.

  Screams sounded when he finished. He smiled sweetly at the crowd and immediately started playing the intro to Bruno Mars’s “When I Was Your Man.” Jesse strutted forward to sing and finished the first set with One Republic’s “Love Runs Out.” Scott was back to jumping around, with his blond hair flying in the air as he danced to the beat. Shelly was laughing and wiping tears at the same time. I felt honored to be sitting with these guys; they were awesome!

  I looked around the room and noticed that many of the ship’s employees were standing around the room enjoying their performance too. The applause was deafening when they jumped off the stage to head our way. The waitress was standing there with a tray full of cold beers for them. They were surrounded by appreciative fans; I had to smile knowing that Jesse just wanted to get to me. I didn’t feel so intimidated tonight; he had made his feelings perfectly clear today. I knew I had captured his heart, and even though the future was unclear, I had the satisfaction of knowing I’d had a profound influence on Jesse Greene.

  The break was over way too fast and back to the stage they went. As before, Jesse announced each member of the band. Scott got a standing ovation, which had Shelly smiling from ear to ear. We were all proud of our men; it was bittersweet. Jesse announced they would be performing all original songs that would be on their first album that was due out in the spring. He put his microphone in the stand and took his stool to begin the soulful “Broken.” I knew the story behind the song; Jesse was only sixteen when he wrote about his first heartbreak. For someone so young to have such clarity to put how he was feeling into words was proof of his talent. John noticed that right away and took those boys right out of high school to join his band.

  Next was “Crazy Love,” which had the audience on their feet. I wondered which woman in Jesse’s sordid past resulted in that song; she must have been a piece of work. They sang two more very upbeat songs, and then the lights went down, and the spotlight shone on Jesse as he pulled the stool out from the side of the stage to sit.

  “Tonight I’d like to sing a new song that I wrote on this cruise about a remarkable girl I met that’s changed my life,” he said. He was strumming his guitar and started humming a tune with his eyes closed. He opened his eyes and looked directly at me and smiled. I could feel the tears starting to form in my eyes as I smiled back at him. Shelly put her arm around me for a quick hug as he hummed the melody to his new song.

  “It’s called ‘The Girl in Red,’” he said as Scott and Keith joined in playing their guitars. Jesse sat on the stool as the spot light shone only on him. He started to play the melody, and then he closed his eyes as he sang into the stand-up microphone:

  I turned, and there you stood in that little red dress.

  You looked up at me and captured my breath.

  Your dark eyes, they captivated me, and when you smiled,

  I couldn’t take my eyes off you!

  Oooooh…oooooh…hmmm…hmmm…

  You were the most beautiful creature I’d ever seen,

  Standing there with the sun shining behind you,

  Looking more like a mirage than a real person to me.

  Right then I knew I had to have you.

  Oooooh…oooooh…hmmm…hmmm…

  Who is this beautiful girl? I need to know her name.

  The wind was blowing your hair around.

  I held up my hand as my heart skipped a beat.

  I’d never felt something so profound!

  Oooooh…oooooh…hmmm…hmmm…

  I turned around, and you were gone.

  You’d disappeared from my sight.

  I knew right then I had to find you.

  My life would never be the same without you!

  Oooo
oh…oooooh…hmmm…hmmm…

  My heart raced as I searched, desperate to see you again.

  Then I saw you in the distance and ran to catch you.

  When I reached for your hand, the sparks started to fly.

  I knew in that moment I had to make you mine!

  Hmmm…hmmm…my beautiful, beautiful girl.

  I whispered in your ear, and you turned around.

  I was lost in your eyes as you looked into my soul.

  You smiled, and my heart skipped a beat.

  I knew I would never be the same without you.

  Oooooh…oooooh…hmmm…hmmm…

  Now our time together has passed, and you’re gone.

  I’m counting the hours until I see you again.

  I feel empty and lost without you.

  I need you desperately, my beautiful girl.

  Oooooh…oooooh…hmmm…hmmm…

  My life is on hold and my heart is broken.

  I’ll never be the same without you.

  I love you desperately, my beautiful girl.

  Please, I’m begging you, come back to me.

  Oooooh…oooooh…hmmm…hmmm…

  He played two more bars of the melody, and the spotlight went out. Suddenly the spotlight was on me. I looked up at Jesse with tears in my eyes as he put his guitar down and jumped off the stage.

  He’d just told our story, and I was in shock at how beautiful the song was. The audience was up on their feet clapping as he pulled me into his arms and kissed me in front of everyone. Tears were flowing down my cheeks as he held me. I was overwhelmed with emotions and clung to him as he stroked my back.

  “I meant every word, sweetheart,” he whispered, pulling my chin up to look at him.

  He wiped my tears and smiled down at me as everyone cheered around us. I never expected that he’d write such a beautiful song about me. I was in shock as the stage lights went out and the rest of the band joined us.

  “I hope this means that she liked the song,” John smiled at me. I wasn’t able to speak; I just nodded and tried to smile at him.

  “See what you did to my boy? He’s a fucking poet,” Scott said, patting Jesse on the back as he pulled Shelly into his arms. We were all celebrating as the crowd approached us, eager to separate us girls from our boyfriends. I knew I had to share him with the fans and excused myself to go to the ladies’ room to clean up. Shelly and Liza went with me as we left the band to deal with their adoring fans, which were eager to get their hands on them. I looked back as I rounded the corner to see Jesse smiling and signing autographs.

  “A look into the future!” Shelly said, standing there watching them.

  “I’m afraid so,” I said, turning toward the ladies’ room.

  “That song Jesse wrote was beautiful,” Liza said from one of the stalls.

  “I know; I can’t believe it,” I said, trying to repair my makeup.

  “That boy’s in love with you, girlfriend,” Shelly said.

  “Scott was amazing tonight,” I said to her.

  “I know; his voice is so sweet,” she gushed.

  “You’re her, the girl he sang about tonight, aren’t you?” a beautiful, blond woman asked as she and another woman walked into the bathroom.

  I looked up at her. “Yes” was all I said. This was the second time I’d been approached by a person from the audience, and it made me feel uncomfortable. They were studying me as I looked at them through the mirror.

  “Your boyfriend is really talented; I’m going to buy his album when it comes out,” she said.

  “Thank you,” I said.

  “I wish I had been the one he noticed on this cruise, lucky bitch!” the other woman said, pushing open a stall door and slamming it.

  “Let’s get out of here,” Shelly whispered. I put on some lipstick and fluffed my hair. We waited for Liza and left in a hurry.

  Jesse looked back and spotted me as we walked into the room. He held out his hand to me. I smiled demurely at all the women surrounding him as he pulled me into his arms. He was mine for one more night, and we were going to make the most of our time together. The crowd parted as the ship’s captain made his way over to our table.

  “Congratulations on another successful performance,” he said.

  “Thank you, sir,” Jesse said, shaking his hand.

  “I’d like to extend an open invitation to your band to join us for another cruise sometime. It was a pleasure having you on board,” he said to John.

  “That’s very generous; thank you,” John said.

  “I wish you all good luck on your upcoming album; I’m sure you’re going to be a huge success. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a ship to run,” he said, shaking hands with everyone.

  Jesse

  I left Bailey resting in bed, because I had plans to keep her awake all night tonight. This was our last night onboard the ship and the band’s final performance. I planned on singing my song for her tonight. John was going to tape it and send it to the record producer.

  I had a long talk with Scotty after we wrapped up our practice.

  “Scott, you asshole, I almost lost the woman I love today because of your big fucking mouth,” I yelled, holding his shirt in my fist.

  “What are you talking about?” he asked, looking shocked by my anger. He didn’t know, apparently Shelly hadn’t enlightened him.

  “Your post-orgasm confessions to your girlfriend asshole. I’m fucking pissed at you,” I hissed.

  “Sorry, man, I’m not sure which one you’re referring to,” he said.

  “Fuck, how much did you tell her? The threesomes, you moron. Your little spitfire blurted it out to Bailey this morning and nearly broke her heart.”

  “Shit, Jesse, I’m sorry. I was just being honest,” he said.

  “That’s fine, but keep me out of it. Bailey is not ready to hear that shit yet.” I yanked his shirt back and forth, trying to shake some sense into him.

  “I’m really sorry; I never thought she’d spill to Bailey,” he said.

  “Well, she did, and I nearly lost her,” I told him.

  “I’m sorry Jess. I promise, man; I’ll keep your secrets, but you should be honest with Bailey,” he said.

  I let go of his shirt, shoving him back slightly. “Scott, I know, just not now. She’s so inexperienced. I don’t want to scare her away,” I confessed.

  “She loves you, man,” Scott said.

  “Yeah, and I’d never do anything intentionally to hurt her, so keep your big fucking mouth shut about my past!” I warned.

  “You got it, man. We OK now?” he asked, fixing his shirt.

  “Yeah, we’re OK,” I said, fake punching him. I pushed his head back instead. “Damn, Scott, I was scared shitless she was going to dump me.”

  “I need your input on something; care to come with me now that you’ve torn me a new asshole?” he asked.

  “Yeah, OK, Scott, we’ve got time; what do you need?” I asked.

  “I want to get something for Shelly,” he said.

  “How about a filter for her mouth,” I hissed. Scott turned to glare at me. “OK, lead the way,” I said, following him. Scott felt bad and apologized over and over to me as we walked. He promised that no more of our deviant ways would be discussed in the heat of the moment. I was glad that he and Shelly had such an open relationship, but I wanted to be the one to tell Bailey about the not-too-wholesome life I led before I met her. She was innocent, and I knew someday I would have to face my past transgressions. I needed to have a secure relationship with her before I went down that road.

  I warned him that next time, I was going to use his face as a punching bag. He just laughed, he knows I’d never hit him, he’s my best friend and knows me better than anyone. Scott was like a brother to me, but this girl was way too important, and I needed her in my life. He told me he understood as he gave me a one-armed hug and patted my back.

  I was anxious to see Bailey after being away from her for several hours. I watched the door ev
ery time it opened, hoping it would be her. I was not prepared for the vision in red that stepped through that doorway. She blew me away with her beauty. She sparkled as her gaze met mine, and a smile crossed her face. She started to walk toward me with those long legs; my heart skipped a beat, and I instantly became hard.

  We had been invited to dine with the captain tonight. John said he was looking forward to meeting us and that he had been in the audience for our first show. I wanted tonight to be fun, not sad. We made our way to the captain’s table, where he greeted each of us. He was very charming and quick-witted, making us relax and be ourselves at his table. Scott, of course, the goofball that he was, rolled out the jokes and kept everyone laughing. The captain had some interesting stories that he told about some of his adventures aboard his ship as we dined on a delicious dinner. We laughed and joked with the captain and his crew, having a great time.

  I couldn’t take my eyes off Bailey; she was so damn beautiful. I held her hand in mine as much as I could while eating. She’d just smile at me and pull her hand away so she could drink her wine. When it was time for us to leave, we said our good-byes and headed out on deck to see the sunset one more time. Its beauty was already captured in some of Shelly’s pictures, and she didn’t disappoint tonight either. She pulled out her camera to capture me holding Bailey as we watched the sunset over the ocean.

  I’d never noticed things like stars, moons, and sunsets before Bailey came into my life. I confessed that to her as we stood there. I guess you could say I was going through life with blinders on. I could understand now why my father was so disappointed in me; he wanted me to slow down and enjoy the world around me. I wanted to embrace the fast life of a rock star, sleeping all day and carousing all night. I was never really living up to my full potential; that was what John was trying to tell me, but I wouldn’t listen. It took this gentle, sweet girl to show me what I was missing in my life. Beauty was all around me, but I never saw it.

  Listen to me—Scott was right; I was turning into a fucking poet!

  Everyone’s spirits were high tonight. John was excited to be seeing Natalie again.

  We all were pumped to be cutting an album and had a lot of work ahead of us getting my words turned into songs. The rest of November, December, and January were going to be crazy.