Picking Up The Pieces

by Brenda Adcock

  After what seemed like the longest day she’d ever had, Lauren got out of her car and dragged into the house. She didn’t find Athon in any of her usual spots and went into their bedroom to change into comfortable clothes. She stopped by the refrigerator and picked up a bottle of water before heading out the back door. Tall grass, despite the lack of water, had sprouted up around the remaining old cars. Lauren heard a sputtering sound and was halfway around a bush when she saw Athon. She was holding a gas-powered grass trimmer in her hands and pulling the cord to start it. The back of her t-shirt was soaked with perspiration. She pulled the cord again and it sounded as if it would start, but then stopped. Lauren watched as Athon fiddled with it and tried again. She pulled the cord five more times, but the motor refused to catch. Lauren could tell that Athon was growing frustrated by the way her shoulders rose and seemed to tighten. She had seen the same reaction due to frustration a few times before and knew that eventually Athon would explode in anger. Maybe she needed a few minutes to cool off. Lauren stepped around the bush and stopped next to Athon, running her hand lightly down her arm.

  “Get away from me,” Athon growled, her voice and body vibrating with anger.

  “Is taco salad all right for dinner?” Lauren asked calmly.

  “Fine,” Athon snapped.

  Before Lauren made it back to the house she heard loud yelling and cursing, along with the sound of something being beaten against the ground. She shook her head. They would need to purchase a new grass trimmer.

  A few minutes later, Athon stomped into the house, letting the back door slam behind her. Lauren was at the counter chopping up ingredients for their salads while the ground beef simmered on the stove. “This will be ready in about fifteen minutes if you want to grab a quick shower,” she said with a smile.

  “Don’t tell me what the fuck to do!” Athon stormed as she walked purposefully down the hallway toward their bedroom.

  By the time Lauren set two plates on the table and was pouring iced tea into glasses, Athon had returned. She paused long enough to kiss Lauren on the cheek and pat her lightly on the rear.

  “Smells great,” Athon said cheerfully, taking a long swallow of tea.

  Lauren pulled a chair from the table and sighed as she sat. “Feels good to take a load off my feet for a while,” she said as she brought her fork to her mouth. “Did you have a good day?”

  Athon nodded as she chewed. “Frank called,” she said around a mouthful of food.

  “Are they back in the States?”

  Athon laughed. “Mandy’s dragging his ass all over the place looking for a house. They’ll be here in a couple of weeks.”

  “It’ll be good to see them again.”

  “Frank gave me the name of a friend, some contractor he met in D.C. He’s looking for an analyst to go over data at Randolph. Thought I might be interested once I become a civilian again.”

  “Are you interested?”

  Athon shrugged. “I might be.” She laughed. “I can only cut the grass so many times.”

  ATHON SAT UP in bed, gasping for air. She brought her hands to her face and ran them through her hair. She shivered slightly as her wet clothing stuck to her body. No! her mind screamed as she threw the covers back and stood to rip the t-shirt away from her skin. She looked down at Lauren, who was soundly sleeping. After pulling on a dry t-shirt, she tried to settle back into bed. She was still shivering and moved closer to Lauren, sliding an arm over her side to absorb the warmth of her body. Lauren rolled toward Athon in her sleep and cuddled closer.

  Athon closed her eyes, but could still see the laughing, bearded faces. She raised her head and glanced at the clock on the nightstand. Nearly an hour had passed. She carefully extracted her body from Lauren’s arms and slid out of bed. She picked up her clothes and walked quietly down the hall into the bathroom. After closing the door, she stared at herself in the mirror over the sink as she splashed cold water on her face and dried it. There had been times since her return home when she didn’t recognize the face looking back at her. She wondered what Lauren saw. She jerked her eyes away from the mirror and pulled on her socks and jeans before slipping her feet into her sneakers. She pulled a shirt over her t-shirt and left it unbuttoned. She flipped off the bathroom light and let her eyes adjust to the darkness. She grabbed to keys to her Jeep and walked outside. Hoping the sound of the engine wouldn’t awaken Lauren, Athon drove slowly down the drive and turned onto the highway. She didn’t have a destination in mind. Fresh air blowing in the driver’s side window felt good and she inhaled it deeply, no longer feeling as if she was suffocating.

  She rubbed a hand through her short hair, letting her mind wander wherever it wanted to. There were times when she didn’t know who she was anymore. She needed to ground herself some way. She needed to find the woman she thought she had been. Words seeped into her consciousness. Confident, commanding, loving. Had she been those things? She saw Lauren’s smiling face float in front of her causing her abdomen to flutter. The beautiful mocha-skinned woman told her she loved her and everything she did seemed to confirm that. Lauren made her laugh and want to cry at the depth of her desire for Athon, her desire for the other Athon, the one who hadn’t come home broken and lost.

  The outline of a vaguely familiar sign loomed on the left-hand side of the highway and for reasons she didn’t understand, Athon turned onto a long neglected road. The asphalt was cracked and tall grass grew stubbornly through them. She slowed the Jeep and followed the road. At the end of it her headlights swept across the side of a long abandoned mobile home, the roof long since collapsed into the interior. She stopped and shifted the Jeep into park, staring at the mobile home. She left her headlights on and eased out of the Jeep. Flashes of pictures seemed to strobe through her mind. She knew this place. She carefully walked up what remained of concrete steps to a door. The knob turned when she twisted it, but it didn’t open. Flooded with frustration and sudden rising anger, she clasped the knob tightly and slammed her shoulder into the flimsy looking aluminum door. Whatever held the door in place relinquished its hold and Athon flew into the blackness inside the mobile home, landing in a stinking pile of damp insulation and other debris. She found something stable enough to hold her weight as she pulled her body up. She could see stars overhead when she looked up and dusted her jeans off. The Jeep’s headlights were on high beam and cast an eerie light into the interior. She climbed over a broken section of the rusted-out roof.

  As she stepped off the collapsed section she caught her foot on a piece of wiring and fell again. When she rolled onto her back and pulled the wire away, the breath seemed to leave her lungs as Hank’s sneering, filthy face glared down at her. You ain’t got what it takes, kid, he said as he threw his head back and laughed.

  Athon scrambled to her feet as quickly as possible and pressed her body against the rusted remains of a refrigerator, afraid to open her eyes. When her breathing was under control again and she felt her heart stop thumping against her chest, she opened her eyes defiantly and saw nothing. The unhappy yowling of a cat as it dove through an opening in the hallway startled her and she shook her head. Why the hell was she prowling through an abandoned old mobile home? What had drawn her inside this shithole?

  She saw an opening on the other side of the hole and stepped inside. Light from her headlights was weaker here, but she could still see an old mattress on the floor. Screaming and laughter assaulted her ears and her hands flew up to cover them as her eyes slammed shut. Small, flailing arms and legs, grunting sounds, and the hollow-looking eyes of a woman leaning against the opening into the room made Athon bend over in pain and sent her racing to the front door of the mobile home. Not stopping to go down the concrete steps, she jumped to the ground and fled to the safety of the Jeep. She stomped on the accelerator and swung the vehicle into a half circle before speeding away.

  She was breathing fast and didn’t bother to slow down as the Jeep careened back onto the highway as she fought to escape and maintain contr
ol of the vehicle. She hadn’t gone far when blue and red lights swept across the rearview mirror. She had to get away and increased her speed. The lights followed her and a voice ordered, “Police! Pull off the road!” Was it a trick? She locked the doors and brought the Jeep to a halt along the shoulder of the highway. Her hands shook as she looked around for something she could use to defend herself. She had been helpless then and felt helpless now. She felt a stabbing pain low in her abdomen and leaned forward to make it go away. Pounding on the driver’s window drew her attention and she turned her head to stare into the muzzle of a weapon held by a man with a beard. Adrenalin flooded her body and she blinked at the bearded faces that surrounded the Jeep.

  “Get out of the vehicle slowly, hands first!” a voice commanded as a man motioned with the weapon. The pain in her abdomen disappeared as she reached for the door handle and pulled on it. She needed to be calm and find an avenue of escape. Frank would come for her soon.

  The man backed away and watched her nervously as a smile crossed her face. She was certain she had seen a slight waver in the hands holding the gun. “Move to the front of the vehicle and spread your arms on the hood,” the officer ordered.

  Athon closed the door and backed toward the front of the Jeep, her hands clasped behind her head. The officer grabbed her arm and spun her around, forcing her to bend over the hood. He kicked her legs slightly apart and re-holstered his weapon as he began running his hands over her body searching for hidden weapons. I know what tough women like you fear most, she heard as a body pressed against hers.

  The officer started to back away, leaving Athon an opening, although a small one, to make her escape. She turned before the officer could react and brought her hand up quickly using the heel of her hand to break the man’s nose. She watched as blood poured from his nose and tears blinded him temporarily. She moved behind him and wrapped her arm around his throat as she relieved him of his weapon. He grabbed at her arm to dislodge it, but she held on.

  “Let him go, Athon!” a voice yelled.

  Athon looked up and saw a semi-crouched figure approaching quickly, their weapon drawn and pointed steadily at the pair.

  “Frank?” Athon called out.

  “I gotcha Major. You can lower the weapon now.”

  Athon breathed heavily and shoved the man away from her. She flipped the weapon around and held it out butt first.

  Sheriff Raynelle Cosper took the sidearm and shoved it into her belt. She dropped a hand on her deputy’s shoulder. “You okay?” she asked.

  “She broke my node,” he answered.

  “So it seems. Medics will be here soon. I’ve got it from here,” she said.

  “You’re bleedin’ a little,” Cosper said when she walked up to Athon.

  Athon hadn’t seemed to notice and brushed her fingers across her forehead, staring at the blood on her fingers. “Not too bad,” she mumbled.

  “How do you feel?” Cosper asked, tapping her head with her index finger. “You know. Inside.”

  “You think I’m fucked up too?” Athon asked with a frown.

  “Don’t know. Where were you?”

  The deputy held a handkerchief to his nose. “When I stopped her she was coming out of the drive at that old abandoned trailer park,” he said, his nose obvious badly stuffed up.

  Cosper looked back at Athon. Her eyes seemed unfocused. “How’re you doin’? Really?”

  Athon shrugged. “Some days are better than others.”

  “And Lauren?”

  “Don’t know why she sticks around. I treat her like shit.”

  “Guess maybe because she loves you, girl,” the sheriff said.

  Athon looked at Cosper and shook her head. “She loves who I was, Sheriff, not so much who I am now.”

  Cosper squinted at her. “Then maybe you should clean up your act, Dailey.”

  “I can’t change who I am.”

  “Lauren deserves better and you know it. If you don’t want to be with her then leave, but don’t leave her hangin’ in the wind.”

  Cosper escorted Athon to her patrol car and noticed she seemed off-balance. She eased an exhausted Athon into the back and she fell into the seat. Athon watched as an ambulance and two additional patrol cars arrived. Cosper removed her hat and sat behind the wheel of her car.

  “What about my Jeep?” Athon asked, rubbing her forehead.

  “A deputy will follow us back to your place,” Cosper answered, craning her neck to look for oncoming traffic. “What were doin’ out here anyway, Athon?”

  “Don’t know. Couldn’t sleep,” Athon mumbled.

  “You assaulted my deputy.”

  “He touched me. I had to defend myself,” Athon said, her voice stronger. She leaned her head back and stared at the headliner of the car. She scrunched her forehead as a headache beat a rhythm keeping time with her heartbeat. She looked down at her clothing and shook her head at the sight of blood on her shirt and took a deep breath. Lauren would be pissed.

  By the time Cosper, followed by Athon’s Jeep, pulled up next to the carport at Athon’s house Lauren was waiting on the front porch, frowning. Cosper opened the back door of her car and helped Athon out.

  “Sheriff Cosper called,” Lauren said as her eyes drifted up and down Athon’s body when she started up the steps to the porch. “Are you all right?”

  “Just a bump on the head.”

  “Your head doesn’t need any more bumps, Athon,” Lauren said tersely.

  “I know that, Lauren,” Athon snapped. “It was just a misunderstanding.”

  “It’s always a misunderstanding,” Lauren said.

  For the first time Athon clearly saw the look of profound disappointment in Lauren’s eyes. She slowly made her way up the four steps to the porch and leaned against the railing. “I’m sorry, Lauren. I know I’ve hurt you, but I never meant to.” She stepped forward and hesitated before wrapping her arms around Lauren, the muscles stiffening under her touch. She lowered her head to Lauren’s shoulder and felt tears run from her eyes.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Duvalle, Texas July 2010

  LAUREN WAVED WHEN she saw Mandy and Frank Hardesty making their way down the concourse from the gates at the San Antonio International Airport. As soon as they left the security area. Lauren and Mandy rushed toward one another and chattered as they hugged. Then Lauren stepped back and stared at Mandy’s bulging abdomen.

  “Oh my God! When?”

  Frank stopped next to his wife, shaking Athon’s hand briskly and wrapping an arm around her shoulder. “You mean when did I knock her up or when is the kid supposed to arrive?”

  “Congratulations, Frank,” Athon said with a laugh. “Tell us when it’s due and we can figure out the other part.”

  Frank grinned. “Four more months circling the field before landing. You should give it a try.”

  “I could try day and night, but it ain’t gonna happen, buddy,” Athon said shaking her head. “Let’s get you someplace less hectic.” She took Mandy’s rolling suitcase and they followed Lauren and Mandy, who had linked arms, out of the terminal and across a street to the parking lot.

  “How’s your new job going?” Athon asked.

  “I’m a paper pusher. The only flying I’ll be doing is throwing paper airplanes across the office. You miss it?”

  “Sometimes.”

  “You doing okay? Really?”

  “Some days are better than others, but I have things to keep myself busy. Lauren found a position with a school in San Antonio, so she’s happy. I spend most of my time cleaning house and getting dinner on the table when she comes home.”

  “I bet that hurts.”

  Athon shrugged. “Now I know how the other half lives, at least for now.”

  “What are you planning to do once you’re officially out?”

  “Haven’t decided, but I’ll find something.”

  On the drive home, Mandy and Lauren continued talking. Athon looked in the rearview mirror and smiled. “Yo
u two are going to run out of things to talk about before we get to the house.”

  “Never happen, Athon,” Mandy said.

  “Nothing short of lockjaw would be effective,” Frank added.

  “It’s a wonder she stopped talking long enough to get pregnant,” Athon quipped.

  “I don’t have a problem ignoring her when necessary,” Frank said, looking over the back seat at his wife.

  Mandy winked at him. She grabbed the back of the front seat and leaned forward. “I’m looking forward to seeing you in your dress blues, Athon,” she said.

  “You’re looking forward to seeing me uncomfortable? Thanks a bunch,” Athon said.

  Mandy glanced at Lauren. “I want to see if Lauren’s right.”

  Athon saw Lauren beginning to blush through the rearview mirror. “About what?”

  “She’s always told me you’re so fucking hot in your dress blues that she practically has an orgasm just from looking at you.”

  “Is that right?” Athon said with a grin as she watched Lauren cover her face with her hand. “I’ll get a chance to test that theory in a couple of days.”

  “Oh God,” Lauren mumbled as she slid farther down into the back seat.

  “In fact, I might have to try it on tonight to make sure it still fits,” she added with a laugh. For the first time in a long time, Athon felt at ease and almost normal again.

  TWO DAYS LATER, Athon stood nervously waiting for her retirement ceremony to begin. She knew it would be a lengthy, tedious process and she had suffered a few equilibrium problems that morning. She looked down at the cane Lauren had convinced her to use and tapped it against the side of her polished dress shoes.