by Joan Holub
Contents
Greetings, Mortal Readers,
1. Stinky River Styx
2. Wild Ride
3. Three Rules
4. Thirsty
5. Forget It
6. The Helm
7. The Furies
8. Tag! You’re Dead.
9. Lord of the Underworld
10. Olympians, One and All
About Joan Holub and Suzanne Williams
For Ward Williams, best son ever —S. W.
For Paul, best brother ever —J. H.
Greetings, Mortal Readers,
I am Pythia, the Oracle of Delphi, in Greece. I have the power to see the future. Hear my prophecy:
Ahead I see dancers lurking. Wait—make that danger lurking. (The future can be blurry, especially when my eyeglasses are foggy.)
Anyhoo, beware! Titan giants now rule all of Earth’s domains—oceans, mountains, forests, and the depths of the Underwear. Oops—make that Underworld. Led by King Cronus, they are out to destroy us all!
Yet I foresee hope. A band of rightful rulers called Olympians will arise. Though their size and youth are no match for the Titans, they will be giant in heart, mind, and spirit. They await their leader—a very special yet clueless boy. One who is destined to become king of the gods and ruler of the heavens.
If he is brave enough.
And if he can get his friends to work together. And if they can learn to use their new amazing flowers—um, amazing powers—in time to save the world!
CHAPTER ONE
Stinky River Styx
Zeus, Poseidon, and Hades stood on a hill, gazing downward. A river wound like a snake through the gloomy valley below. It was all that stood between them and their goal—the Underworld.
Zeus sniffed the air, then wrinkled his nose. “P.U.! What is that stinky smell?”
Poseidon pointed toward the valley with the three-pronged end of his trident. “I think it’s that river.”
The river looked brown and sludgy. There was a giant sign by it that read: RIVER STYX.
Maybe the sign was written wrong, thought Zeus. Maybe it should really say: RIVER STINKS!
Hades gazed happily at the river. “What are you guys talking about? I think it’s awesome!”
“You would, weirdo,” said Poseidon. “Well, you know what I think? I think there’s no way I’m going near that river. I think that oracle is crazy.”
Zeus knew he meant Pythia, the Oracle of Delphi. She’d sent them here to the Underworld on a quest. They were supposed to find the Helm of Darkness. Whatever that was. As usual, she hadn’t fully explained. She always seemed to expect them to figure these things out on their own.
“But you like water, remember?” Zeus told Poseidon. He tried to sound more cheerful and encouraging than he felt. “I mean, you’re an Olympian—the god of the sea!”
They’d discovered this on their last quest to the Aegean Sea. There they’d found Poseidon’s trident in the possession of a Titan named Oceanus. The trident was like a pitchfork, only cooler. They’d found Hades in the sea too.
However, they’d also lost Hera. She’d gone looking for the trident on her own. Who knew where she was now? Zeus hoped she was somewhere safe.
“I like clean, blue rivers,” Poseidon informed him. “Not stinky gloppy skunk water. Besides, it’s not just the river that creeps me out. It’s that whole place down there. It’s so—”
Honk!
The boys looked around in alarm. Where was that loud, deep honking sound coming from? Right then a sudden spurt of hot steam sprayed up out of the ground under Poseidon. He jumped a foot high.
“Steamin’ undershorts!” he yelled, grabbing his behind with his free hand.
Honk! Psst! Another squirt of hot steam burst unexpectedly from the ground. This one struck Hades. “Yeowch!” He grabbed his behind and hopped around too.
Honk! Psst! Honk! Psst! More spurts gushed out of the ground.
Then one struck Zeus. He jumped in surprise and pain. “Thunderation, that’s hot!”
“Let’s get out of here!” Poseidon called. The boys ran toward the river.
Anytime they slowed, a honk sounded and another spurt of steam attacked. Honk! Psst! “Ow!” Honk! Psst! “Ow!”
“Last ferryboat to the Underworld!” shouted a voice up ahead. Zeus squinted his eyes at the boat. It was sailing toward them from the opposite side of the river. Since it was the same brownish color as the water, it blended in. That’s why they hadn’t noticed it before.
“A boat to the Underworld?” called Hades. “Perfect! Let’s get on it.”
“Like we have any choice?” Poseidon yelled back.
“Yeah,” Zeus agreed breathlessly. “It’s like we’re being herded down to the boat.” The spurts were chasing them, so they could only move forward.
And it wasn’t just the three boys who were being rounded up. Dozens of other people began to appear. They streamed down the hill running for the boat too. Most of them were really old. But they were moving pretty fast.
As the boys got closer to the boat, they saw a man on board. He reached up to pull a string attached to a horn. Another loud honk sounded. More hot spurts shot out of the ground around them.
“Hey! I think that ferryboat horn is what’s causing the steam to honk out,” Zeus told his friends.
The three boys dashed the rest of the way to the ferry. Just as they were about to leap onto it, a hand blocked their way.
“Halt!” It was the man who had sounded the horn. He was pale, with long white hair and wrinkled skin. And he was wearing a hat with his name: Captain Charon.
He peered at them closely. “Are you dead?” he asked them.
Zeus nodded, breathing hard. “That’s for sure. Dead tired. We could use a ride.”
“No, I think he means—” Hades started to tell Zeus.
“All righty, then. Pay your fare,” the captain interrupted. “Passage across the River Styx costs one obol. Each.” He held out his hand, palm upward, waiting.
“Better pay the fee,” a woman behind them advised. “It’s either that or wander these shores for one hundred years.”
“We don’t have any money,” Zeus admitted.
“Next!” said Charon, pushing the three boys aside. He let a man come forward. The man opened his mouth and stuck out his tongue. There was a silver coin on the tip of it!
Charon took the coin and flipped it high with his thumb. It arced through the air. Plunk! It landed in a coin bag tied at his waist.
“Get lost,” Charon barked at the boys when they didn’t leave. “You’re blocking others who can cough up the fare. They’re dying to get in.”
Zeus and Poseidon just stared at him.
The ferryboat captain grinned. “That was a joke. Get it?”
“No,” Zeus and Poseidon said at the same time.
But Hades burst out laughing.
Zeus and Poseidon looked at each other, not getting what was so funny.
“Finally,” Charon said to Hades, sounding flattered. “Someone who appreciates a good joke. Are you with them?” he asked Hades, hooking his thumb toward Zeus and Poseidon.
Hades nodded.
“Okay, then. Just this once I’ll overlook the fare. Welcome aboard!” Captain Charon stepped aside and waved the three boys onto his boat.
CHAPTER TWO
Wild Ride
Charon used a long pole to push the ferryboat off the riverbank once everyone was aboard. As they began the trip back across the river, he smiled big.
“All righty, shades, you paid your obol. Now it’s showtime!” he announced. “Let’s see if I can bring a little life to this party!”
“Why is he calling ever
ybody shades?” Zeus mumbled.
“Because that’s what we are. Shadows of our former selves,” explained the man standing next to him.
The boys stared at him, unsure what he meant. The others on board did look kind of pale, thought Zeus. But they were people, not shadows.
Just then Charon’s voice boomed out, making everyone jump. “First a little humor. Who can tell me what the favorite game in the Underworld is?”
Before anyone could guess, Charon answered his question himself: “Pick-Up-Styx! Ha-ha-ha!”
The ship got dead quiet. Everyone looked confused.
Then Hades burst out laughing again. “Oh, I get it. You mean ‘sticks,’ which sounds like ‘Styx.’ Which is the name of this river. Ha-ha-ha! Good one!”
“Thanks. I got a million of ’em!” Encouraged, Captain Charon proceeded to tell one joke after another. And he supplied all the punch lines himself without giving anyone a chance to guess them.
“What are the Greek gods’ favorite musical instruments?” he asked. “Harp-ies.”
“Why did the Greek student fail the test? Because he made too many mythtakes.”
Zeus rolled his eyes. Poseidon groaned. Hades kept on laughing.
A man next to them leaned toward the boys. “Why did the shade beg the boat captain to stop telling lame jokes?” he asked. Then, just like Charon, he gave the punch line. “Because they were killing him—again.”
Zeus looked at the man, still confused. Poseidon shrugged and said, “Whatever. But if his jokes don’t kill us, the stink from this river probably will.”
“I like Charon’s jokes,” Hades protested as the man turned away to talk to someone else. “And I still don’t see what’s wrong with the river.”
The three boys looked over the railing. The muddy water below swirled with globby goop. Every now and then strange crocodiles with pink eyes surfaced to blink at them.
“It looks and smells like garbage stew,” said Zeus.
“Yeah,” Poseidon agreed. “Maybe I can clean it up with my trident, though. Like I fixed the sea on our last quest.”
He stuck the tip of his gleaming golden trident into the mucky water. Then he stirred it around, chanting:
“Trident, trident—tried and true,
Turn this river sparkling blue.”
After a few stirs the three boys gazed expectantly at the river. But it remained sludgy brown.
“Maybe your trident’s powers don’t work in the Underworld,” said Hades.
Poseidon looked alarmed. “But they have to work! We can’t go on a quest without magic. How will we defend ourselves?” He kept stirring and staring hopefully at the water. Nothing happened.
Now Zeus was worried too. He reached for his dagger-size thunderbolt and pulled it from his belt.
“Bolt! Large!” he commanded. But the zigzag bolt didn’t sizzle or spark with electricity. And instead of expanding into a five-foot-long thunderbolt, it stayed the size of a small dagger.
Zeus and Poseidon shared panicky looks. Zeus had gotten used to having the thunderbolt’s magic to help him out of bad situations. He’d pulled the bolt from a magical stone in the temple of Delphi. Since then it had become a friend as well as an amazing weapon.
Friend? No! I shouldn’t think of it like that, he thought. After all, the bolt didn’t even belong to him. It belonged to some guy named Goose. The oracle had told him that. And as soon as Zeus found Goose, he was going to have to give him the bolt.
“Check your chip,” Hades suggested. “See if it’s working.”
“Good idea.” Zeus tugged on the leather cord around his neck. There was a smooth stone as big as his fist strung on the cord. He’d gotten it from the temple too. It was a magic amulet that could speak and give directions.
The three boys leaned in to study it.
“Chip?” Zeus asked it. But it didn’t reply.
“No symbols,” Poseidon noted. “No compass arrow either. I think Hades is right. Our gadgets don’t work here in the Underworld.” He yanked at his trident. Its prongs had gotten tangled in some seaweed and wouldn’t come loose.
“Which means we’re doomed!” Hades moaned. Suddenly he didn’t sound so cheery anymore. “We can’t complete our quest without weapons or a compass to show us where to go. Remember what the oracle said?”
Zeus nodded, then quoted her from memory: “‘You must find the Helm of Darkness. It rightfully belongs to the one who is lord of the Underworld. Find it and you will also find more of the persons you seek. Only, beware of the second of the king’s Creatures of Chaos. For they are far more dangerous than—’”
Wham! Suddenly the ferryboat gave a hard jerk. Everyone on board stumbled and swayed. Zeus and Hades lost their balance and fell to their knees. Poseidon hung on to the railing with one hand and his trident with the other. Frightened cries sounded among the passengers.
Wham! The boat pitched forward again. “Those pink-eyed river creatures are snapping at my trident!” Poseidon shouted.
Each time the creatures missed, their flat, scaly noses hit against the boat’s hull. That was what was causing the jerks.
“You—with the pitchfork!” yelled Captain Charon, pointing his river pole at Poseidon. “Don’t tease the crockydeads!”
CHAPTER THREE
Three Rules
Wham! The boat shuddered yet again.
Chomp!
“Help! The crockydeads just sunk their teeth into my trident,” Poseidon cried out in disbelief. “They’re trying to steal it!”
Zeus jumped to his feet. He, Poseidon, and Hades all grabbed the trident’s handle. They pulled hard. But the creatures were strong. They pulled back harder. It was a tug o’ war!
Thump! The ferryboat bumped into the landing dock. They’d crossed the river and were on its far shore now. The jolt surprised the crocky-deads into letting go of the trident. The three boys yanked it out of the river.
The crockydeads gave the boat one last slam with their snouts. Then they slithered away into the oozy brown water.
Captain Charon scowled at the three boys. “Troublemakers!” Using his ferryboat pole, he shoved them over to the gangplank. “Get off my boat!”
“Wait!” Zeus said. He grabbed the gangplank railing and stared at the captain. “Maybe this isn’t the best time to ask, but my compass isn’t working. I wonder if you could give us some directions before we go?”
“We’re looking for the Helm of Darkness,” added Poseidon.
Hades nodded hopefully. “Have you heard of it? We know it’s here somewhere in the Underworld, but we don’t know wh—”
Bam! Charon banged the end of his pole onto the deck, interrupting him. “There are three rules here in the Underworld.”
He stepped toward them, wearing a fierce expression. Zeus, Poseidon, and Hades each took a step backward down the gangplank.
Charon held up a bony finger in front of their faces. “Rule number one: Don’t ask nosy questions. Got it?”
The three boys nodded.
Charon took another step forward, and the boys each took another step backward. He held up two fingers. “Rule number two: Obey orders. Got it?”
The three boys nodded again.
“Good!” Charon gave them each another sharp nudge with the long ferryboat pole. “Now get off this boat!”
“I wonder what rule number three is,” Hades whispered to Zeus.
“Probably best not to ask,” Zeus advised.
“Yeah, don’t forget rule number one,” said Poseidon.
The boys scuttled down the gangplank and hopped onshore. Other passengers swarmed past them in a hurry, sweeping them along. The ground was swampy and sucked at their sandals as they ran.
They were all heading for a fence a few dozen steps from the riverbank. It was made of iron spikes twice as tall as the boys. And it looked like it surrounded the entire Underworld!
Creeeak! Suddenly two giant gates in the middle of the fence magically swung open. Like the jaws of a giant si
deways crockydead mouth, they looked ready to gobble everyone!
“Creepy,” Poseidon muttered as they entered.
“You mean awesome!” Hades exclaimed.
“Why does this gate’s magic work in the Underworld but ours doesn’t?” Zeus wondered aloud. His companions were too busy studying their surroundings to answer.
“Look!” Poseidon said after they passed through the gates. He was pointing to something ahead. A magnificent golden throne! It was just sitting there in the middle of the swamp. Empty. Except for a square jeweled box that rested upon its velvet seat.
A big sign hung on the back of the throne. It read: BEWARE OF THREE-HEADED DRAGON DOG.
Hades had been pretty delighted with everything about the Underworld so far. But suddenly he screeched to a halt.
“Dog? Three-headed dragon dog?” His eyes widened in fear. “I’m outta here!” He spun around and fled toward the gates and the riverbank.
“Come back! We need to stick together,” Zeus called out. When Hades didn’t stop running, Zeus and Poseidon chased after him.
The tall spiked iron gates were slowly swinging shut now that everyone was inside the fence. Beyond them the boys could see Charon angling his long pole against the shore of the River Styx. He pushed off.
“Wait for me!” Hades shouted to him. He put on a burst of speed, trying to make it through the gates in time.
CLANK! The gates swung shut in his face.
Hades grabbed on to two of the tall iron rails and stuck his face between them. “Take us with you!” he yelled toward the ferryboat.
Charon glanced back at the three boys. His ferry had already begun to cross the river toward the opposite shore. “No can do. Remember rule number three?”
The boys shook their heads. “No! You didn’t tell it to us!” yelled Poseidon.
Charon shrugged. “Rule number three is: This ferry only carries passengers one way—into the Underworld. Once you’re in, you’re in. There’s no escape.”
Which meant they were all stuck in the Underworld—forever!
