by Joan Holub
Grrr! Grrrowl! The three boys whipped around at the threatening sounds.
A snarling, drooly dog had appeared way behind them by the throne. The dog was scaly like a dragon and almost as big as the Delphi temple! It even had a dragon’s tail that ended in a sharp arrowhead-shaped point. Besides that it had three heads! And each one was growling.
The three boys stood frozen at the sight.
“We’re trapped!” wailed Hades.
“With no magic!” moaned Poseidon.
“C’mon,” said Zeus. “We’re sitting ducks out here by ourselves. Let’s go mingle with the others before that dog notices us.”
Quickly they made their way into the middle of the group. “We are so dead!” Hades muttered.
“True,” said a man alongside him. “I was struck down in a battle a week ago.” He drew a finger across his throat.
“I tripped over a bucket and broke my neck,” said another man. “Kicked the bucket, you might say.”
“Snakebite,” said a third guy. “Never recovered.”
“What are you guys talking about?” asked Zeus.
“How we bit the dust,” the snakebite guy said matter-of-factly.
“You mean to say that you’re all dead?” asked Poseidon. He’d finally put two and two together.
“Of course,” said Hades. “That’s what Captain Charon’s jokes were about. Duh—didn’t you get it?”
The others nearby in the crowd nodded.
Poseidon stared at Zeus and Hades, terrified. “We’re not dead, though. Are we?”
“No way!” said Zeus, trying to calm him.
Then he had an awful thought. The oracle had promised they’d find more of those they sought here in the Underworld. Which meant more Olympians. But he’d also hoped it meant he might find his mom and dad—whom he couldn’t even remember. His mom had left him in a cave in the care of a nymph, a goat, and a bee when he was just a baby.
But if everyone down here was already dead, did that mean his parents were dead too? His heart sank.
Still, he tried to be brave for the sake of his two friends. “Don’t worry. I didn’t go to all that trouble to free you for us to end up dead!” he assured them.
Poseidon and Hades were two of the five Olympians he had rescued not long ago. They’d been trapped in the belly of Cronus, the big bad king of the Titans. With a toss of his thunderbolt down the king’s throat, Zeus had made Cronus barf them all up. Now Zeus felt kind of responsible for them. At the end of this quest they just had to get out of here alive!
Except for a few growls now and then, it had gone quiet around them. The boys peeked from the crowd to see what was going on.
“That dog is herding everybody into three lines,” said Poseidon.
There was a sign at the front of each line. Zeus squinted to read them all. “The sign on the left has a big E on it,” he reported. “The middle sign has an A.”
“The one on the right has a T,” added Hades.
“E-A-T spells ‘EAT’,” said Poseidon.
Zeus cocked his head. “Eat?”
“I knew it!” wailed Hades. “That dragon dog is dividing us up into his breakfast, lunch, and dinner!”
CHAPTER FOUR
Thirsty
Hades’ loud wail reached the dog’s three sets of ears. Its three heads bobbed up. Its six red eyes narrowed, scanning the crowd.
“Looks like we’re not so safe mingling with the crowd after all,” said Zeus. “Let’s get out of here.”
“I’m with you,” said Poseidon, peeling off from the line.
“Hey, wait for me!” called Hades. Ducking behind some shades, the three boys tried to sneak off into the nearby bushes.
Woof! Woof! Woof!
“Oh, no!” yelped Hades. “He’s spotted us!”
Sure enough the dragon dog came bounding over, all three heads snarling and drooling. In an instant the beast had the boys cornered.
Hades tried to run past it. But he tripped over a scaly log. The dog growled and leaned over him, baring three sets of teeth.
“Get away!” Hades shouted. Half-sitting on the log, he felt around for a weapon. His hand wrapped around something. A stake! Using both hands, he yanked it from the log. Maybe he could use it to defend himself.
Oww-ooo! The dog started howling. It tucked its tail between its front paws.
Suddenly the log was gone and Hades was sitting on the ground. He looked down at the stake in his hand. It was actually a thorn. A very large thorn.
“Thunderation! You just pulled that thing out of the dragon dog’s tail!” said Zeus.
“Tail?” echoed Hades. “I thought it was a log!”
“Run!” called Poseidon.
Before Hades could budge, the dog’s heads whipped close. Three mouths opened, each showing two rows of icicle-sharp teeth.
Zeus gasped, sure that Hades was a goner.
Then the dog let out a gurgle that sounded sort of like, “Sir. Brr. Us.” Its three tongues slipped out. Lick! Lick! Lick!
“Stop! Eew!” yelled Hades, swatting at the dog’s heads. “Help! It’s licking me to death!”
“No way I’m sticking around to be dragon dog dinner!” said Poseidon. Arms and legs pumping, he took off for the bushes.
Zeus grabbed Hades’ arm and pulled him up. The two boys followed Poseidon.
“Is it after us?” Hades asked after they’d gone a dozen steps.
Zeus had been sure the dog would give chase. Glancing over his shoulder, he saw that it hadn’t, though. In fact, it was just sitting there holding its tail and staring after Hades. It looked kind of sad, like its feelings were hurt.
Weird. But before Zeus could think much about it, he stumbled over a tree root. He slammed into his two companions. They all hit the ground. Oof!
Then all at once they were rolling down a hill, head over heels. When they finally came to a stop, they were in a valley. It was far below where they’d been only moments before. Far from that dog, thank goodness!
Poseidon’s trident had wound up in Zeus’s lap. When Zeus sat up, the trident bumped the magical bolt tucked under his belt.
“Eware-bip the-Ip iver-Rip ethe-Lip,” said a small, squeaky voice. It was Chip, Zeus’s amulet! It spoke in Chip Latin, which was like Pig Latin, only you moved the first letter of each word to its end and added an “ip” sound in Chip Latin. Instead of the “ay” sound used in Pig Latin.
Poseidon looked over at Zeus, eyes wide. “Moldy mackerel! It’s talking again?”
Excited, Zeus fished the amulet from the neck of his tunic and studied it. The symbols on it flickered briefly as he pushed the trident away. Then the amulet conked out again.
Disappointed, Zeus dropped the amulet back inside his tunic. “Guess not.”
“But what did it say a minute ago?” asked Poseidon. Zeus frowned uncertainly.
“Sounded like ‘Beware the liver thief,’” said Hades.
“Well, that’s a big help,” said Poseidon. He picked up his trident, stood, and dusted himself off. Then he froze.
“You!” he blurted, staring at someone across the way. “Thanks for saving us the trouble of finding you again!”
Zeus and Hades scrambled to their feet to see who he was looking at.
Alongside a river that ran through the valley stood a familiar figure. A claw-handed Titan as tall as a tree.
“Oceanus,” muttered Hades.
They’d captured Oceanus during their last quest, but he’d escaped before they could imprison him. Someday, somehow, they were going to have to lock all the Titan giants away. Otherwise the Olympians would never be safe from them.
A woman with long dark red hair stood beside Oceanus. She, too, was as tall as a tree. Turning toward Oceanus, she gave him a metal bowl.
Grinning at the boys, Oceanus clacked one of his enormous claw hands at them in a taunting wave. Then, without a word, he dove into the river and swam away.
“Come back here, thief!” Poseidon shouted as the thr
ee boys rushed toward the river. He hadn’t forgiven the Titan for stealing the trident from him long ago.
They’d all assumed that Oceanus had run off to King Cronus when he’d escaped them before. Why did he come here instead? Zeus wondered. Who is this woman with him, and what are they up to?
When the three boys reached the riverbank, they stared into the water where Oceanus had dived. This river was a clear, flowing blue. Very different from the River Styx. Zeus licked his lips, suddenly thirsty.
The red-haired woman still stood at the edge of the river. She seemed to be deep in thought. Suddenly she said, “I’ve got it! Roy G. Biv.” She looked over at the boys. “What do you think?”
“About what?” Zeus looked up at her. And up, and up. “You’re a Titan, aren’t you?” he accused, before Poseidon or Hades could even open their mouths.
“Yes, I’m Mnemosyne,” she replied, pronouncing it nuh-MAH-zuh-nee. “But fear not. I mean you no harm. Come, you boys look thirsty.” It was like she’d read Zeus’s mind!
She kneeled and dipped a tiny glass into the river. In her fingers the glass looked as small as a thimble. When it was full, she held it out to the boys.
“Here, drink from my river,” she told them. “Rest and forget your troubles awhile.”
“Who’s Roy G. Biv?” asked Poseidon. He stepped closer, reaching for the glass she offered. He took a drink.
“It’s my new mnemonic,” she explained easily. She pronounced the word as nuh-MAH-nick. “A mnemonic is a way of remembering something. For instance, ‘Roy G. Biv’ stands for the colors of a rainbow. Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue, Indigo, Violet.”
“Oh, I get it,” said Hades.
Poseidon took another drink.
“My gift is the power of memory,” she went on pleasantly. “That’s how I came up with the idea for mnemonics like the one for the rainbow. Down here the dead don’t see many rainbows. I want to help them remember the colors.”
Still kneeling, she dipped water from the river into two more glasses.
“We saw you talking to Oceanus,” Zeus said. “What did he want?”
Mnemosyne shrugged, shifty-eyed. “Nothing much.”
She smiled at Zeus and Hades. She held the two glasses of sparkling water out to them. “Drink,” she crooned. “The waters of the River Lethe are the clearest of all five rivers in the Underworld. The most delicious, too. You’ll forget any other water once you taste this.”
Zeus was suspicious. But the sound of her voice and the sight of the water were making him thirstier than ever. He took the glass she offered. Beside him Hades took the other glass.
The River Lethe, thought Zeus. Why does that ring a bell? As he brought the glass to his lips, it clinked against his amulet. That’s it—the amulet! he thought. It had been trying to warn them about this river just a few minutes ago!
He dropped his glass without drinking from it.
Thrusting out his hand, he slapped the glass from Hades’ hands too, before he could drink.
Poseidon’s glass was already half-empty. Still, Zeus leaped to Poseidon’s side and swatted it away.
“Whoa! Why’d you do that?” Poseidon whined. “It was good.”
“I just realized what Chip was trying to tell us before,” exclaimed Zeus. “It said ‘Beware the River Lethe’!”
Hades stepped back from the woman. “So you were trying to trick us!” he accused.
Mnemosyne laughed lightly and scooped two fresh glasses of water from the river. She tried to hand them to Zeus and Hades. “Don’t be silly. Drink, Olympians,” she ordered.
“What’s an Olympian?” Poseidon asked blankly.
Zeus and Hades glanced at him in alarm.
“It’s what, um, what we are!” Zeus told him. Mnemosyne didn’t seem to realize that Zeus wasn’t an Olympian like Poseidon and Hades. But that was probably a good thing.
She might fear him more if she didn’t know he was only a mortal. Well, maybe he was a little more than a mortal. The oracle had called him a hero in training.
Looking determined, Mnemosyne rose to her feet. Zeus and Hades each grabbed one of Poseidon’s arms. Then they skedaddled.
“Go ahead and run, little chicken boys!” Mnemosyne yelled, not so nice anymore. “But if you think you’ll escape us Titans this time—you can forget it!”
She let out a scary-sounding laugh. Then she dove into the river and swam away. Just as Oceanus had done.
CHAPTER FIVE
Forget It
Am I a farmer?” Poseidon asked.
“A what?” asked Hades, giving him a weird look.
“A farmer,” Poseidon said, studying the sharp prongs of his trident. “If not, why am I carrying around this pitchfork?”
Zeus frowned. “That’s your trident. You’re god of the sea. Don’t you remember?”
After they’d escaped Mnemosyne, they’d wound up here, walking through a smelly sulfur field surrounded by hot lava. Poseidon had been asking dumb questions nonstop. Ever since he’d drunk from that river.
“Oh, yeah. I remember now,” said Poseidon. “I also remember that you’re Zeus.” He looked over at Hades. “But who are you? And I know that this is my left foot. But what do you call my other foot?”
Zeus snapped his fingers. “Right—I’ve figured it out!”
He leaned over to Hades, speaking quietly. “Poseidon drank half the water in the glass Mnemosyne gave him, remember? It must’ve made him forget half of everything.”
“Great. Just when we need our wits about us, he turns into a half-wit,” Hades murmured back. “He’s not going to be any help in finding the helm now. Not as long as he’s forgetting stuff.”
Just then Poseidon laid his trident on the ground so he could pull a rock out of his sandal. When he started walking again, he left his trident behind, forgetting all about it.
Hades sent Zeus a See what I mean? glance.
Zeus picked up the trident and held it under one arm. It bumped his bolt dagger with every step. Before he could return the trident to Poseidon, the amulet around his neck suddenly twitched.
Excited, Zeus pulled the amulet out of his tunic with his free hand. A single word appeared on its surface in bold black letters: UNDERWORLD. When it faded away, some small words appeared on the amulet. There were lines too, some straight and others wavy.
“It’s a map!” Zeus exclaimed.
Hades and Poseidon came over to look. “Of what?” Poseidon asked.
“I think it’s the Underworld,” Hades told him.
Zeus peered intently at Chip’s surface. There were three areas circled on the map. Each was labeled with a letter. One had a T. One had an E. One had an A.
Under the T was the word, “Tartarus.” Under the E were the words “Elysian Fields.” Under the A was “Asphodel Meadow.”
“Tartarus,” Zeus mused. He looked up at his companions. “That’s where the amulet told us to imprison Oceanus, when we were on our last quest. Looks like it’s a place right here in the Underworld.”
“So if we can recapture Oceanus, we could still take him there,” said Hades. “Mnemosyne, too.”
Poseidon pointed to the map. He moved his fingertip from the T to the E and on to the A. “That spells ‘TEA’!”
“Or if you rearrange the letters they could spell ‘EAT’!” Hades exclaimed. “Like those signs we saw before by the Underworld gates.”
“Hey! I bet ‘EAT’ was another one of Mnemosyne’s mnemonics,” said Zeus. “To help people remember the layout of the Underworld. E for ‘Elysian Fields,’ A for ‘Asphodel Meadow,’ and T for ‘Tartarus.’”
“So that’s why the dog was making the shades form three lines?” asked Hades.
Zeus nodded. “Yeah, those must be the three places where the dead go.”
“Okay, so I guess the dog doesn’t eat the dead after all,” said Hades. “But what if he eats the living? Like us!”
Poseidon was looking confused. “Dog?” he asked. “We have a dog? Awe
some!” He glanced around as if searching for it. “Here, poochie, poochie.”
“I’ll be glad when he gets his memory back,” said Hades. “If he ever does.”
“Ditto,” Zeus agreed. He handed the trident back to Poseidon. “Here, you forgot something. Don’t let go of it again.” The instant he handed over the trident, the words and lines on his amulet blinked out.
“Oh, no!” said Hades.
“Don’t worry. I memorized the map,” said Zeus. “Elysian Fields is closest, so let’s check it out first. It’s this way.”
On the way to the fields, they explained to Poseidon about the quest they were on. Ten minutes later they were standing in front of a tall green hedge. There was a door in it with a sign that read:
WELCOME TO THE ELYSIAN FIELDS
WHERE EVERYONE IS GOOD, AND DEAD
They pushed the door open and went inside. The fields were beautiful, with grapevines, fruit trees, gardens, and sparkling fountains. There was a fancy glass greenhouse at the far side of a field of wildflowers. The boys didn’t see any people, though.
Zeus sniffed the sweet smell in the air. “Mmm. Roses.”
Poseidon plucked a bunch of plump grapes from one of the grapevines. As they moved through the fruit trees, Zeus picked an apple and Hades picked a pear. They all began munching.
“So this is where the good people go after they die,” said Zeus. “Nice.”
“Yeah, I could get used to it,” said Poseidon.
Hades shrugged. “I guess. I prefer the smell of sulfur swamp myself.”
Zeus tossed his apple core away and reached toward a tree for another apple. Suddenly he noticed a long golden strand of hair caught on a low branch. He recalled Hera’s long, golden hair whipping in the wind when some half-giants had chased them during their last quest.
“This looks like Hera’s hair,” he said. Poseidon and Hades studied the golden strand too.
“You think when she went looking for the trident, she wound up here?” asked Poseidon.
It was weird, the stuff he could remember, when he forgot everything else. But at least he could remember Hera.
