The Loudest Silence_A Post-Apocalyptic Zombie Novel

by Kate L. Mary

  10

  A pulsing red light jolted me from sleep, and I bolted upright. Around me, the room flashed from black to crimson, but it took a moment for my sleepy brain to register what was happening.

  It was the alarm.

  Something was happening on the surface.

  I stumbled out of bed, my feet tripping over one another when they got tangled in the sheets, almost making me fall. Somehow, I managed to kick the fabric away and regain my balance at the same time. My bare feet sank into the thick carpet as I took off running. I was barely dressed, wearing only a pair of tiny underwear and a thin tank top, but when I paused, it wasn’t to grab clothes. It was to swipe my gun and knife off the bedside table. Once I had them, I was out the door, running through my condo before rushing out into the hall.

  The flickering red light seemed to become more persistent as I charged up the stairs, my bare feet slapping against the floor, but it was no doubt only my imagination. Still, the unrelenting flash had me moving faster, taking the steps two at a time and winding my way up. Briefly, I caught sight of someone in front of me, but they disappeared around a corner before I could figure out who it was. It wasn’t until I charged into the common room that I spotted Emma in front of me. Like me, she was heading for the control room, alerted by the flashing lights that something was happening on the surface.

  She didn’t slow for me, but it didn’t matter. I followed her, running past the bar and through the computer room, and then up the small flight of stairs that led to the industrial hallway. The two doors at the end of the hall were closed, but the one on the right was open, and Blake, Cade, and Kellan were already inside when Emma and I arrived.

  The lights were no doubt still flashing throughout the lower levels, but up here there were none. Instead, we had a wall of screens, each one showcasing a different view of the outside. The small cement building that led underground, the animal pens, the flat, sandy earth that stretched out around us for miles and miles in all directions, as well as the chain link fence and gate that kept the rest of the world at bay. That was what everyone was focused on when I stopped at Kellan’s side, gasping as I tried to catch my breath. They were all staring at the gate. Or more specifically, at the woman standing on the other side of the gate.

  “When did she show up?” Kellan asked Cade.

  The other man shook his head, shoving his blond hair back out of his face. “I don’t know.”

  “What do you mean, you don’t know?” Blake snapped.

  Cade narrowed eyes on him, but before either one could say a thing, Emma stepped between them. “Stop. This isn’t the time.”

  “I went to the bathroom,” Cade said, his jaw clenched like he was trying to rein in his anger. “She wasn’t there, I left to use the john and get a drink, and when I came back, there she was.” He waved at the screen. ”That was about five minutes ago. I wasn’t gone for more than ten.”

  “You shouldn’t have been gone at all,” Blake muttered under his breath, but loud enough that everyone could hear it.

  “Stop,” Kellan said.

  He stepped in front of Cade and gently pushed the other guy’s chair back. It rolled a few inches, making room for Kellan to get closer to the screens. He adjusted the camera, and it zoomed in on the woman. No, not woman. A girl. She was younger than I was, probably late teens, and she stood motionless on the other side of the gate, staring forward like she was waiting for something to happen. The wind blew her hair across her face, which I could tell was blonde despite the black and white picture, and her arms were wrapped around her chest, hugging herself like she was trying to keep warm. She seemed to be shivering, and I had to wonder if it was chilly out there. Despite the dusty landscape, Oklahoma didn’t often cool off after the sun went down. Not when it got really hot out. If another storm was rolling in though, it could have brought a cold front with it. Which we all knew could be the perfect recipe for a tornado.

  “She’s only a kid,” Emma said then looked around. “We have to let her in.”

  “We can’t just let her in,” Blake replied, his words coated in ice. “What if she has a big group somewhere? What if she brings them back here, and they run us out?”

  “So we’re going to leave her out there?” Emma shot back. “It’s obvious she knows someone is here or she wouldn’t still be standing there like that.”

  “Blake’s right.” Kellan tore his gaze from the screen. “We can’t let her in. At least not without talking to Jasper first. He’s the one who decides who comes in. He’s the one who brought all of us here.” His gaze moved to Cade. “Well, almost all of us.”

  “Where is he?” I asked.

  “Probably slept through the alarm.” Cade hauled himself up out of the chair. “I’ll go get him.”

  He didn’t glance Blake’s way when he squeezed by him, heading for the exit.

  The second Cade was gone, Emma turned on her ex. “You have some real nerve—”

  “Stop it.” Kellan straightened and tore his gaze from the screen. “You guys need to work through your drama later. This isn’t the time, and I’m not the least bit interested in it.” His gaze moved to Blake. “You know as well as anyone that taking a break is unavoidable. This could have just as easily happened to you, and there’s no harm done. It’s not like she’s inside the fence. Hell, she hasn’t even tried to climb it.”

  He turned back to face the screen without giving either Blake or Emma a chance to respond.

  I stepped further into the room, pushing past the others so I could stand at Kellan’s side. “What would you do if it were up to you?”

  “It’s not up to me,” he said.

  His eyes darted my way for a moment, moving down, and I was reminded that I’d run out of my room without getting dressed. Heat flared across my cheeks, and I crossed my arms. Given the choice between grabbing a weapon or clothes, I’d always choose the weapon, but I now wish I’d had a pair of pants lying around, too.

  “But if it were up to you,” I said, hoping to divert his attention from my lack of clothing. “What would you do?”

  Kellan let out a deep sigh the way he always did when he was thinking. “It’s a tough call. She’s young and alone, but Blake’s right. She could have people who might not be willing to play nice.”

  “Or she could have people who could contribute.” I looked from Kellan to the others, who had stopped arguing and were now staring at me. “We have room for more people, and yet we haven’t brought anyone new in for years.”

  “For good reason.” Kellan didn’t take his eyes off the screen in front of him, but I didn’t miss how his jaw tightened or the way he clenched his hands into fists.

  “There are still good people in this world,” I reminded him. “We’re good.”

  “There are also a lot of assholes,” Blake said. “People who will stab you in the back the first chance they get.”

  Though we all knew he was thinking of Cade, we chose to ignore it.

  I turned my back to the screen so I could look the others over. This was all there was left of our original group. Six out of twenty-three. But we had enough room for fifty down here, more if we pushed it. I understood the hesitation, but I also thought it was a shame to hide ourselves away from the world forever.

  “So this is how it’s always going to stay?” I glanced toward Kellan and found him watching me, his expression unreadable. “Only the six of us for the rest of our lives? What about trying to have a life? What about trying to start over? How can we do that if we don’t let more people in?”

  Blake looked at the floor and said nothing.

  “So, you think we should let her in?” Emma’s eyes were focused on the screens at my back, but I got the feeling it had more to do with trying to avoid looking at Blake than the girl who stood shivering outside our gate.

  “I think there’s no point in living unless we do everything we can to have a life.”

  “And more people equals a life?” Kellan asked.

  I tur
ned to face him. “It could mean finding someone to spend your life with, maybe even having a family down the road.”

  Even as the words left my mouth I felt like a traitor. The thought of putting ideas in his head about being with someone else made my stomach twist, but it was what I’d been thinking for years. Emma and Cade had each other, but that was it for us. I wasn’t interested in Blake, and I had serious doubts he would ever be able to move on from Emma unless he met someone new. Then there was Kellan. I had no idea what went through his head when he thought about the future, but he had to want more than what we had. The very fact that he had female friends in the Altus settlement told me he did.

  “She has a point,” Blake muttered after a few seconds of silence.

  He didn’t lift his gaze, so he didn’t see the pained expression that crossed Emma’s face or the way Kellan shook his head. I wanted to reach out to Blake, to hug him because I couldn’t imagine the pain he went through on a daily basis. Being so close to his ex and never being able to escape the happiness she’d managed to find in the wake of their ruined relationship had to be torture.

  Instead, I turned to face the screens and chose to say nothing. Jasper would have the final say, which made discussing it pointless. That didn’t mean I couldn’t have an opinion, though.

  The thud of footsteps heading down the hall was the next sound to break the silence, and a moment later Cade walked back into the room, followed by Jasper. His age had been showing more and more lately, but never as much as it did at this moment with his fingers curled the way they were, emphasizing the discomfort in his joints, and the way the lights shone down on the circles under his eyes, making him look like he hadn’t slept in weeks. He rubbed his hand down his face like he was trying to scrub the sleep from his eyes, but it didn’t work.

  “I’ll be,” he muttered, and then let out a low whistle. “Nine years, and we ain’t never had anyone stumble across us like this.”

  “We’re too far out,” Kellan said, as if in agreement. “It doesn’t make sense for someone to be out here. Especially not alone.”

  “Which means she could be in trouble,” I piped in.

  Kellan frowned and his gaze moved to me, but he said nothing.

  “She looks a little worse for wear,” Jasper said, leaning closer to the screen.

  The image was fuzzy, so I wasn’t sure how he could tell. Then again, as Kellan had pointed out numerous times, I wasn’t the most observant person around.

  “What do you think?” Cade asked.

  Jasper blew out a long breath as he turned his back to the screens. “I think,” he began, “it’s time you kids started making some decisions. I’m not going to be around forever, and sooner or later you all are going to have to learn to handle things on your own. There are five of you, and I’ll go with whatever the majority thinks.”

  It was the last thing I’d expected him to say, and judging by the shocked expressions on the others’ faces, I wasn’t alone.

  “You’re serious?” Kellan asked, and this time when his eyes darted around, they focused on each one of us for a few seconds before moving back to Jasper. “You’re going to leave this up to us?”

  “What if we make the wrong choice?” Emma asked.

  “I’m just as likely to make a mistake as you are,” Jasper replied. “We all know that. Hell, you’ve lived it.” Pain flashed in his eyes as he waved his hand toward the screen. “So go on. Vote.”

  No one spoke right away, but it came as no surprise that the first person to open his mouth was Kellan. “I say no. She’ll go away eventually if we ignore her, and that’s the best thing we can do. It will keep us safe.”

  “Are you serious?” Emma snapped.

  “I am.” Kellan crossed his arms and met her fiery glare. “I want us to be safe.”

  Emma rolled her eyes. “Well, I say yes. She’s a kid, and she could be in trouble.”

  “I’m with Emma,” I said. “We don’t have to open the door and give her free rein of the shelter, but letting her in won’t hurt.”

  “It could hurt if she kills us all in our sleep,” Kellan said.

  “We can put her in the holding cell until we have a better feel for the situation.” I waved toward the hallway. “That’s why we have it, after all.”

  “Then what?” Cade looked between Kellan and me. “What do we do if we decide she’s a threat?”

  Silence followed the question because I knew what he was asking. Did we kill her? I didn’t have an answer for that. These days, having to kill the living was part of life, and I knew both Cade and Kellan had been forced to take lives in the past, but I never had. Making this decision meant her life would be in my hands if things turned sour, even if I wasn’t the one to pull the trigger, and I wasn’t sure if I could live with that. Too bad I was also unsure if I could live with the idea of turning her away.

  When no one said anything, Cade shook his head. “That’s what I thought.” He looked at Emma for a few seconds like he was thinking something through, and then focused on Kellan. “I’m with you. I say no. It’s too risky, and I’m not willing to put our lives on the line to save a stranger.”

  Emma’s brown eyes were twice their normal size when she turned on him, but she said nothing, and neither did he. The tension bubbling in the air between them was palpable, though, and I had a sudden flashback to the last few months of Blake and Emma’s relationship. The shelter had felt much too small back then, and it had become nearly impossible to get away from their arguing.

  Kellan turned his gaze on Blake. “It’s up to you. You’re the tie breaker.”

  “Great,” Cade muttered. “I wonder whose side he’s going to be on.”

  Blake didn’t look at him, and he didn’t look at Emma either. I got the impression he didn’t want to take sides with either of them, but I knew Blake well enough to know he wouldn’t back down from responsibility. Even one as sucky as this.

  The silence seemed to stretch out for a long time before Blake finally let out a deep breath. When he tore his gaze from the screen, he focused on Kellan. Probably so he didn’t have to look at his ex or her new boyfriend.

  “I say we let her in.”

  “Figures,” Cade muttered.

  Blake raised his hand, but didn’t look away from Kellan. “Because Regan is right. We have a holding cell, and we can keep an eye on her, which means there’s no reason to turn our backs on someone who might be in serious trouble. She’s a kid, and she’s out here in the middle of nowhere. She needs our help.” He nodded once, almost like he was trying to convince himself he was making the right decision. “It’s the right thing to do.”

  “Okay, then,” Jasper said, speaking up for the first time since he’d said the decision was up to us. “Grab your weapons, and let’s head up.” His gaze moved to me. “Those of us who are dressed, that is.”

  A flush spread across my cheeks even as I held up my gun and knife. “I had to make a choice, so I did.”

  “You’re not going to get a lecture from me.” Jasper gave me a crooked grin. “Of course, that doesn’t mean I’m not going to tell you to put some clothes on.”

  “You can meet us up there.” Kellan barely glanced my way. “If you hurry, you won’t miss much.”

  I took one quick look around the room before turning on my heel and taking off through the shelter. Behind me, the others were talking about what they would do next, as well as what would happen once we brought the girl down. I heard Cade say he was going to get the first aid kit, which I knew would buy me a few more minutes. I wanted to be there when they went to the surface. I wanted to find out who this girl was and how she’d ended up at our gate in the first place.

  I got dressed in record time and had just reached the second level when I nearly plowed into Cade as he was coming out of the clinic. He jerked back as I skittered to a stop, and we both let out breathless laughs.

  “You worried you’re going to miss something?” he asked, starting to walk again and motioning for
me to follow.

  “Well, you know, it isn’t every day we bring someone new into the shelter.”

  “It shouldn’t be,” he said, shaking his head.

  “You really think we should leave her out there to possibly die?”

  “I think we need to put our safety above everyone else’s.” He didn’t look at me.

  “Luckily, Jasper didn’t feel that way nine years ago,” I retorted. “If he had, Kellan and I would have probably died in Altus, and you never would have met Emma.”

  Cade shot me a look without turning his head. “Yeah, I know. But after what happened last time—” He shook his head again. “I just want to keep us safe.”

  “She’s one girl, Cade,” I pointed out, “and we’re better prepared now. We know what a threat one person can be.”

  “Too bad we had to learn the hard way.”

  I didn’t have a response for that.

  We walked the rest of the way in silence, but reached the control room only to find it empty. Irritation shot through me as I headed for the stairs that led to the surface, but Cade barely blinked.

  The thud of our footsteps bounced off the cement walls, reaching a crescendo as we made it to the top. The small building on the surface was only twelve feet by twelve feet and held nothing other than three doors: one leading down, one for the elevator that had been useless for going on three years now, and a final one that led outside. We stored a few things up here, like big barrels that could be pulled out if it rained so we could collect water, a few weapons in case something bad happened, as well as piles of wood. That was it, though. As secure as this shelter was, we didn’t want to put any of our supplies at risk by leaving them up here. Things were much safer down in the main shelter.

  The door leading outside was open, allowing a gust of wind to sweep into the small room. It was both cool and humid at the same time, telling me that I’d been right earlier. Another storm was on the way. Hopefully, it only brought rain and not more hail. Or worse, tornadoes. We were safe down in the shelter, but our animals were exposed, and without the luxury of tornado sirens to let us know when a big storm was on the way, we were too often caught off guard, making it difficult or even impossible to get our animals inside and away from severe weather.