My Little Secret

by Anna J.

“You know what, Midori? You’re right. When I get to the office, she’ll be called into a meeting.”

  “If you don’t do it, I will. I’ll be hitting her husband up to let him know what’s going on, too. Don’t fuck with me, Ray. I promise you won’t win.”

  “Are you threatening me?” he asks, abruptly sliding his chair back from the table and standing up to tower over me.

  “No, I’m not threatening you at all,” I say as I stand up as well. I only come to about his shoulder, but I don’t care. The bigger they are, the harder they fall. I don’t even bother to raise my voice, but I know what I have to say would hit like a ton of bricks.

  “Well, it sounded like a damn threat to me,” he says, circling the table and standing right in front of me.

  Lord, just don’t let me have to go get my little friend from the bedroom closet. I’d kill his ass, then turn around and do the damn autopsy.

  “I’m not threatening you, Ray, but I promise you that if the bitch isn’t gone by lunchtime, you won’t like how shit goes down. It’s cheaper to keep me, Ray. Believe me when I tell you, it’s cheaper to keep me.”

  I don’t even bother to wait for a response. I simply turn to rinse my cup and set it inside the dishwasher. I can feel his stare burning a hole into the back of my head, but Ray isn’t stupid. I have five brothers who are just waiting for him to fuck up, so they’ll have a reason to chop him up into little pieces and feed him to the family dog.

  Just to be a smart ass, I take the keys to my car, and to his on the low, so he will have to move out all the other vehicles he has in our five-car garage to get to the jeep he drives when he isn’t driving his Phantom to the office. Normally he would have already switched spaces with the Phantom, and when I see that he hadn’t swapped cars yet, I take advantage of the situation.

  We park in the driveway because, who feels like having to back out of the garage every day when, if the car was right there, we could get in and bounce? I don’t care either way. Since he wants to make shit hard on me, I’ll be making it hard on him.

  After my drive in to my office, I park my car in front of my building, and after checking to make sure everything is running, I walk two blocks down, battling the wind to go to the Starbucks coffee shop, so I can get some scones and another cup of coffee, since I’d neglected to eat breakfast. The wind is whipping up some kind of crazy, and I have to almost walk backwards to keep from being blown away.

  As I attempt to do just that, I bump into a soft body, and instantly regret it. I don’t want to turn around because I think it may be Jaydah stalking me, but to my surprise it is Nevaeh. I haven’t been in the same space with her since dinner that night, and I’m kind of surprised that she knows my name.

  “Midori, how are you?” she asks me with a bright smile that suddenly makes it feel a little warmer outside.

  I am stunned by how beautiful she is, and I can’t take my eyes from her face. “I’m good. How have you been?” I finally respond, stepping into the warm embrace she offered. I can smell her Pink by Victoria perfume wafting up from under her scarf as we embrace, and I close my eyes and inhale for a quick second, trying to remember and forget at the same time how it feels to be held by a woman.

  “I’m good. Just had to drop off some shots to a photographer not too far from here.”

  “And how is Jaydah?” I ask on the sly, just to see if she will answer the way I want her to. I want her to say she is going through it and she doesn’t know why, so I can tell her it’s because of me, but she doesn’t say that. In fact, her answer takes me totally by surprise.

  “Oh, girl, I can’t keep her off me. Mmmm, she just got me turned the hell out.”

  “Is that so?” I say in response, not sure how Jaydah would feel about her just outright telling people her business. Not that Jaydah is shy with the fact that every so often she wants a soft body in her bed, but she doesn’t just go around saying that shit to total strangers either.

  “Honey, I’m pressed for time, but check this out. What are you doing for lunch today? I want to talk to you about something,” Nevaeh says, seemingly oblivious to the fact that she just told me she’s gay. At the same time she piques my curiosity, and makes me wonder what she has to talk to me about.

  I was actually planning to go over to Ray’s office to set a few of them bitches straight and to make sure he gets rid of Barbara’s bitch ass, but what Nevaeh has to say seems a tad more interesting. It’s cool, though. I’ll just make it a quick lunch with her so I can still jet over to Ray’s office and have time to get back for my afternoon patients.

  “I should be free around that time. What did you have in mind?”

  “Let’s meet at the Lotus on Chestnut Street, let’s say, around one. We could have a nice light lunch and chat. We have a lot of catching up to do.”

  We exchange numbers, and I hurry back to the office to get my morning started.

  I zip through patient after patient, letting my staff know to transfer a few of my patients to the other resident doctor so I can take a late lunch. By twelve I am done, out the door, and sitting at the Lotus fifteen minutes early, waiting for Nevaeh to show up. At first I thought this was a setup, but when I see her walking into the restaurant ten minutes later, I know I made the right choice by showing up.

  “Hey, Midori,” she says as we embrace, and her perfume made its home in my nostrils again.

  If I was the type, I would definitely bed her ass, just to get back at Jaydah, but for me it isn’t that serious. I just want to know what she wants to talk about.

  We place our orders for salads and hot tea, which are served to us immediately. We both take several sips from our tea and a few bites from our salad before we begin to speak.

  “So, what did you want to talk to me about?” I ask as I bite down on a crouton and lick the dressing from my fork.

  Her eyes follow the sensual movement of my tongue, and I pretend like I don’t notice, as I tease her with what she could possibly have.

  “Jaydah was telling me that you and Ray were going through it, but she wouldn’t say exactly why. Was it about her?”

  I am surprised at just how bluntly she posed her question, as if she was simply asking me about the weather or where I got my shoes. I decide to tread lightly because this feels like a setup, and if I know Jaydah at all, I know she wouldn’t have spoken about us to any woman. Nevaeh was jealous, and she came here to puff her chest out and let me know that she possibly has won. Little does she know that if indeed she does get Jaydah, it would be because I handed her over, not because she took her from me.

  “No. Why would you ask that?”

  “I was just wondering. Jaydah is so fidgety around you, and if past experience serves me correctly, that means she has a thing for you.”

  “Well, I’m flattered that you think so, but Jaydah and I are just acquaintances. There’s nothing there that I could think of, and besides all that, I’m married,” I say, flashing my ring, which set Ray back a several thousand dollars.

  “I know enough to know that a ring doesn’t mean shit, but I totally understand. Please excuse me, though. I was simply inquiring.”

  “Hey, there’s no love lost, especially since I didn’t know you and Jaydah were an item, but do tell her I said hello.”

  “I certainly will. As a matter of fact I’m on my way there now. My pussy has been throbbing all day, and we both know she’s good at fixing little problems like that.”

  I don’t even bother to respond; I just simply enjoy the rest of my salad, while my silence seems to eat at Nevaeh’s nerves. I know she wants me to wild out and act a fool, but you got to wake up a little earlier in the morning to get me pumped.

  As she gathers her belongings and gets herself together to walk out, I wish her a wonderful day and blow her a kiss, causing her cheeks to turn beet red.

  “Hey, don’t forget to tell Jaydah I said hello. Better yet, have her call me.”

  That was the highlight of my day as she turned and stormed out of t
he restaurant, almost tripping out the door. I swear, I crack myself up.

  Finishing the rest of my tea, I take my time to get myself together and mentally prepared for what could possibly go down at Ray’s office. I’d hate to have to resort to my old ways when I was a young girl from the bottom of West Philly ready to knock a bitch dead in her face. I’d like to think that I am grown and sexy and could handle a situation better than that, but if I walk into that office and Barbara is still there, there’s going to be trouble—trouble, said in my best Dollar Bill voice, à la Bernie Mac from The Player’s Club.

  I pay the bill, leaving the waitress a hefty tip because I like the shape of her lips. I think to get her number, but know that it is this kind of behavior that got me in trouble in the first place. Once settled in my Vanquish S, I ease into traffic and head uptown. Hopefully I won’t have to act a fool, but we will soon see.

  Consequences and Repercussions

  Jaydah

  I hear glass smash and the car alarm go off and die down after a few minutes, but for whatever reason, I don’t move. In fact, I roll back over and fluff my pillow before dozing back to sleep. I haven’t heard from Nevaeh in a couple days, and Midori for over a week, so I don’t think that whatever drama is going on outside has anything to do with me. My dream picks right back up from where it left off, and it is starting to get good too. But my gut keeps telling me to get up and look out the window.

  My condo is on ice, despite the cold weather outside, but that’s the way I like it. I’d rather throw on some nightclothes and pull out an extra blanket to keep warm before opting to turn up the heat. Dragging myself from under the covers and out into the freezing cold, I decide that since I am up I might as well use the bathroom, since I had been holding my bladder for the past four hours because I was too lazy to get up.

  As it is freezing cold in there, I handle my business as quickly as possible, so I can wash my hands and look out the window. My gut starts getting tight, and I just know something is wrong. I just hope it isn’t my shit.

  I go over to the window and pull the shades back, temporarily blinded by the sunlight streaming in. Jogging my memory to remember where I had parked a few days ago, my mouth drops open when I make eye contact with my car. A tear involuntarily slips from my eye as I look at what used to be a hot whip parked in the same spot as my car.

  “I’m losing my mind. I must have parked somewhere else.” I talk out loud to myself as I rush into my bedroom to look for a pair of shoes to put on. I don’t want to believe that my car is fucked up like that, and I have to go take a closer look just to be sure. I try to be rational at first, hoping that maybe I had parked closer to the building where my car was out of view, and that the car I saw belonged to someone else in the building.

  I rush outside, and to my disappointment I didn’t park my car next to the building like I wanted to believe, but I’m not ready to believe that’s my car sitting there looking a mess. Even when I get up on it, my mind won’t accept it. I walk around the car, checking out the slashed tires and scratched paint that reads BITCH on the door and hood. The brick that sits in the window caused the glass to spider out and crumble where it lies.

  This is some bullshit, I say to myself as I run my finger across the black permanent marker that graces my back window. It is a drawing of a stick-figure woman in tears and a huge broken heart next to that, but I still don’t want to believe this is my car. When I get to the back of my car, what I’ve tried to deny for the past few minutes rings true. Sure enough, that’s my license plate staring back at me.

  I keep my cool, surprisingly, and take the walk back to my condo like I have it all together. I pull out my insurance information so I can make a claim and call the police, so I can have a report before I do so.

  As I sit and wait for them to arrive, I toss the thought back and forth in my head on whose ass I am going to put my foot in. Let me retract that, I already know that I’ll be heading up to South Jersey to visit Nevaeh, because Midori definitely has more class than this.

  By the time the cops get here I am already dressed, have eaten, and am watching an old episode of Martin on TV One, getting my laugh on. I still can’t believe how calm I am, but I know I won’t be able to maintain my cool for long.

  The cops badger me like I wrecked my own car, which makes me want to fuck Nevaeh up even more. I give them all of the information they need, and once they are done, I call the insurance company to report my claim. By the time they get done playing “a thousand questions,” I am mentally exhausted.

  They set it up so I can have a rental car, and Enterprise was nice enough to come and get me, so I can fill out my paperwork and drive off the same day.

  When I leave there, I head home to pick up a few things and then point the car toward the New Jersey Turnpike and make my way to Nevaeh’s house with a bat in the backseat, and my mind set to beat her ass. I flip through my CD’s for some riding music, but all that comes to mind is Biggie’s Ready to Die, but on the flip, I am ready to kill.

  About an hour and some change later I pull in front of her house, disappointed that this simple bitch was bold enough to park her car in the driveway. I would have had my shit hidden if I had done some crazy shit like what she did, but it’s cool. I’m here to teach her a lesson.

  Now, my first instinct is to wreck her shit like she wrecked mine, but I have bigger fish to fry. Taking the key she gave me from my back pocket, I let myself in after grabbing the metal bat from the backseat of my rental car. Her place is unusually quiet, and I think maybe she skipped town on me and shit.

  I am prepared to wreck her place, but when I hear a noise come from her bedroom, I creep my way over there to listen more closely. I can hear Dr. Phil on the television telling someone how they needed to get their shit together, and I laugh. Nevaeh will need more than the good doctor’s advice by the time I’m finished with her.

  I grab hold of the doorknob, deciding to make a quick entrance and catch her off guard. Let’s just say, the look on her face is priceless when she sees me standing in the doorway. This simple heifer has the nerve to be dressed in lingerie, like she is expecting me to come and shit. Too bad I have to beat her ass for what she did.

  “Hey, I wasn’t expecting you,” Nevaeh says, looking at me then back at the television.

  I can’t believe she’s going to act like she doesn’t know why I’m here. I don’t even respond. I just lunge at her from the door and commence to beat the shit out of her. I take every frustration that I’ve had with her and whoever else and use that energy to beat the life out of her. I have her by her hair, so I can get a good swing at her face, and I am suddenly glad that I dropped the bat in the living room before I came in because, otherwise, I’d be locked up for a murder one rap.

  She doesn’t even have a chance. She tries to swing back, but the blows are going so fast that she doesn’t know whether to run, or stay and try to fight back. I must have banged her head up against her headboard a million times, and not in a loving way like when I’m over here twisting her back all crazy. I don’t know how much time has elapsed, but by the time I get done, there is a bloody mess on the bed and Nevaeh is crying uncontrollably.

  “Now, the next time you decide you want to fuck up my car know who you’re fucking with. Forget you even know me.”

  I don’t even bother to look back; I simply toss her key over my shoulder and scoop up the bat from the floor so as not to leave evidence. When I leave I feel a lot better, but I feel horrible at the same time. I’m not even the abusive type, but what she did was unacceptable.

  During the drive home I feel like shit, and almost call her a few times, but decide against it. She deserved that ass-whipping, and I’ll do it again if provoked. You don’t just take it upon yourself to mess up someone’s property. I think about reporting her ass, but care a little too much to fuck up her career. I know I am done with her for sure, though. I won’t even miss the pussy, because she’s a damn nag and I am tired of her anyway.


  I drive past Midori and Ray’s spot before I go home, using my binoculars to see if I can peep them from the road, but when I don’t see anyone’s car in the driveway I pull off, thinking that maybe she is a waste of time as well. “I just need to be single,” I say to myself as I drive. Honestly, when I don’t have anyone occupying my time, I get a lot more accomplished.

  I pull up to my house a little while later, noticing that my car is still sitting there. I almost shed a tear as I take a tour around the damage one more time. If the bitch is going to slash my tires, she should have slashed all of them. Who the fuck only slashes three tires, like I could drive off on one? I remember that I didn’t bother to get my key back from her, and she has keys to my house and my whip. I’m changing the locks on the crib anyway just because, but I doubt after the beating that I gave her that she’ll show up around here again. Besides, I’ll be getting another fat royalty check in a few weeks, so once I get my car back, I’ll be right at the dealership, trading it in for something better.

  Walking back to the rental to grab my bag, I walk up to my place. I immediately strip and run some hot water in my Jacuzzi tub. I soak in a nice hot bath to relax my sore muscles. My shoulder is extremely sore—I guess from all the swinging I did—and my knuckles hurt from punching her ass all hard. The more I think about it, the more I regret it and the more I want to call, but you don’t do that kind of shit to someone then call back to apologize.

  I think about Midori and what I’m missing with her. It’s been a while since I’ve had my body pressed about against someone soft, and my hands lead a trail that I know Midori’s tongue would have easily followed. I slip two fingers into my softness and use my other hand to caress my nipples as I try to bring myself to an orgasm. I think I may have to call her and see what’s up.

  Just as I was getting into it, a loud, persistent knock echoes through my condo from the front door, and it pisses me off instantly.

  “Who is it?” I yell from the bathroom in frustration, knowing I wouldn’t be able to hear them if they answer back. Damn I’m pissed, and it shows as I climb out of the tub and track water around my apartment because I can’t find my bathrobe. I finally see it hanging on a chair in my bedroom and rush over to put it on.