by Mia Carson
“Okay, but if you don’t eat that much, no popcorn at the movie.”
I had to look away to hide my smile as Abby glared at her mother before she picked up the piece of chicken and took a bite out of it. She was her mother’s daughter all right. Abby continued to look around, watching the bustle of the wait staff and the other customers as she ate the chicken and all but two of the fries before she declared she was finished.
Ella seemed satisfied, so I paid. I guess Abby must have still been annoyed with Ella for making her eat because she held her hands out for me to pick her up and carry her. I caught Ella’s gaze as I picked Abby up, her soft and approving smile warming me.
We hustled across town to where Coco, a kid’s movie about the Land of the Dead was playing. Having no experience with kids, I was more than a little worried about the subject matter, along with its PG rating, but Ella didn’t seem concerned.
I’d heard of Pixar, of course, but I’d never seen one of their movies. Being a typical guy, I gravitated toward movies with gun fights, fiery explosions, car chases, fisticuffs, and scantily clad women. We settled into our seats, a tub of popcorn in hand, only minutes before the lights went down. I hated coming into a movie after it started, and we’d cut it close. I didn’t care because this was for Abby and Ella, and I wasn’t interested in the movie anyway. When Abby abandoned her seat between us and crawled into my lap so she could see better, Ella moved into her seat and placed her hand on the armrest between us, covering my hand and arm with her own.
I was prepared to take one for the team and be bored out of my mind, but I was flummoxed by how much I enjoyed the movie. It was vibrant, full of life, and engaging. Abby sat, leaning back into my chest with Theodore tucked under her arm, in rapt stillness as Miguel searched for his great-grandfather.
On the way home, I wanted to talk to Ella and tell her how much I had enjoyed the evening and her company, but I couldn’t get a word in edgewise as Abby chattered away in the backseat. Ten minutes into the trip I gave up and joined in the conversation. I’d call her later, after Abby was asleep.
Typical of my luck, Abby began to doze just as we arrived in Hamlinton so I didn’t have enough time to tell Ella everything I wanted to.
“I had a good time,” I said, keeping it short.
She sighed and smiled at me. “So did I.”
“Maybe do it again sometime?”
“I think I’d like that.”
“It’s going to get busy pretty soon and—”
“I know. Don’t worry about it,” she interrupted, laying her hand on my leg in the way she used to. “There’ll be plenty of time after harvest.”
I pulled to a stop in her drive and switched off her car. I didn’t open my door, and neither did she. She was watching me as if waiting for something. I decided to go for broke. I placed a hand behind her head and gently pulled her to me. She came willingly, and our lips met in a slow, easy kiss. There was heat there, but I didn’t allow it to take me, and she seemed content as our lips slowly parted.
“That was nice,” she said softly as she drew back.
“Very,” I agreed.
“Do you think we can…”
I drew a finger across her lips when she faltered. “I don’t know. We’ll take it slow and see what happens, okay?”
“I had a lovely time, Levi,” she murmured after a long pause.
“So did I. Abby is a delight.”
Ella smiled and looked down. “She was on her best behavior tonight. I think you still intimidate her a little, and she wanted to go to the movie. Wait until she’s more used to you and you may see a different side of her, but she’s a good girl.”
“So she’s spirited like her mother?”
Ella’s gaze returned to mine. “Is that a good thing?”
“A very good thing.”
I could sit there for hours, like we once did, but she had Abby to think about. “I should go so you can get someone to bed.” She looked disappointed, but nodded in agreement. Before she could open her door, I pulled her into another quick kiss. “I had a good time, and I’ll call you.”
She smiled. “So did I, and I hope so.”
We exited the car, and while Ella unlocked her door, I gently lifted Abby from the car and carried her inside. Inside her trailer, I handed her over to Ella, and while her hands were full, I took the opportunity to steal another quick kiss.
“I’ll see you around,” I said as I stepped out and shut the door.
I walked to my truck, my feet barely touching the ground. We were going to have to take it slow, but this was going to work, I could feel it. I could feel Ella’s pull as I once had, that certain something that told you the person you were with was right for you. I hadn’t felt that since I left home. I’d lost her once, but now that I’d found her again, I was going to grab onto her with both hands and never let her go.
When I reached the outskirts of Hamlinton, I put my foot down, not in anger, but in joy and excitement. It was as if something I didn’t even know I was missing, some piece of me, had been found. I roared through the night, alive like I hadn’t felt in years. I buried the throttle just so I could hear the truck downshift and claw for speed, before lifting with a grin. Goddamn it felt good to be alive again!
12
Ella
I was humming to myself as I pulled parts for the service techs. It was raining again, and all the farmers who came in for parts were nervous. If the rain didn’t let up, and soon, it was going to be too wet to get into the fields to harvest their crops.
I, on the other hand, couldn’t have been happier. Levi had called me each of the past four nights, just like clockwork, and we’d talked for hours. I hadn’t seen him since our date Saturday, but nevertheless, we were bonding again. It felt wonderful. Our history was still there, buried under years, distance, and mistakes, but we were uncovering it a little at a time. With every bit we uncovered, I would feel better about myself and our chances of getting back what we’d almost lost.
Not only were we reconnecting, but I wholeheartedly approved of how he treated Abby. I didn’t date a lot, but I’d been out a few times, and sometimes Abby went with us. All the guys were polite to her, but I could tell they were doing so to win my approval. They were being nice to her because they knew they had to be, but there was no warmth from them. Clearly, if given a choice, they’d prefer she wasn’t around. I could understand that, but we were a package deal. They couldn’t have me without her. But Levi was different. He had suggested Abby join us, not reluctantly accepted it, but more than that, he engaged with her. He hadn’t acted like she was a bother. I’d noticed, so had Mom, and apparently, so had Abby.
Abby had warmed up to him faster than any other guy she’d met. When she’d crawled into his lap at the theater and sat the entire time, his hand on her tiny body as if to protect her, I’d felt a sense of calmness come over me. For the next two hours, I enjoyed watching the movie without worrying about Abby. I knew right where she was, knew she was safe and comfortable, and I didn’t feel guilty for leaving her with Mom and Dad.
The town gossips were atwitter about our date, and Diane was positively swooning on my behalf. She was spinning a fairytale of how the gallant knight, Sir McCormick, had ridden back into town on his noble steed, a beautifully restored 1969 Chevy pickup, to win back the hand of his beloved, Lady Johnson, and restore her honor. I smiled as I pulled a belt from the shelf and added it to the tote that contained the other parts the tech had requested. It was just a story, but I liked it.
Having Levi on my side and firmly declaring his support had been like soup to a starving man, or in my case, woman. Every time I talked to him, I gathered strength. I’d done nothing wrong and didn’t deserve to be shamed like I had been. I knew it, my family knew it, and now Levi knew it, and he was the most important person of all. So let the town gossip; I no longer cared.
I found it funny that once I no longer cared if people were whispering about me behind by back, all the whispers
were generally positive. Everyone liked a good fairytale, and Levi and his family had always been held in high regard about town. Having him come back and stake his claim on me had raised a few eyebrows, but maybe it also made people think. If he was willing to forgive me, or believe me, depending on which set of rumors you listened to, then maybe some of the townspeople were reevaluating their initial assumptions about me.
I never heard any of the gossip directly. I didn’t before, and I didn’t this time, but now I had source. Diane delighted in keeping me up to date on what was being said, so this time I knew what people were thinking when I caught them casting furtive glances my way. While I didn’t share secrets with her, in exchange for her keeping me in the loop, I’d confirm or deny tidbits of information she had, and she positively relished in having the inside track. It also helped keep the rumors in check. For example, she’d been there when he’d arrived to pick me up at Dolly’s, but I corrected the assumption that Abby hadn’t gone with us and denied we’d slept together.
She was turning into a trusted ally, and I appreciated the fact she didn’t pry. She’d tell me what she heard, I’d correct bits here and there, and she’d leave it at that. I found it endlessly delightful that even though she only worked on weekends, she’d pop into Dolly’s twice just for a visit and give me a heads up on the gossip. She was turning into the little sister I never had.
I finished pulling parts, lugged the tote to my computer, and began entering them on the repair ticket. I was returning from delivering the parts to the shop when I heard the counter bell ring. I quickened my step.
“Hey, Dad.”
“Morning, punkin. How’re you doing?”
“Pretty good. What can I do you for?”
He smiled at my intentionally mangled syntax. “Nothing. I came in to talk to Roger. I got a weird noise coming from the back of the threshing unit. It just started, but if it’s going to be a problem, I want to get it taken care of before I get in the fields.”
Roger was the tech that handled most of the combine harvester problems, and he was a wizard with them. He’d been working on John Deere combines for almost forty years and could listen to one of the big green machines running and know exactly what was wrong with it. If your combine was making a ‘weird noise,’ Roger was the man you wanted to talk to. He could often diagnose the problem from a description or picture, then the owner could decide if he could fix it himself or needed to bring the machine into the shop. Mr. Goodall didn’t mind the techs helping people out because at the very least he got a part sale.
“He’s in the shop. You want me to get him for you?”
“No, that’s okay. I’ll walk back there. How’s Levi?”
The change of subject caught me off-guard. “Fine, I guess, why?”
“You haven’t seen him?”
“Not since Saturday. Why?” I asked again.
Dad shrugged. “Just wondering. You seem happier now than I’ve seen you in a long time.”
I smiled. “Yeah. They’re busy gearing up for harvest, like everyone else, but he calls me every night and we talk. It’s nice to be wanted again.”
“Just take it slow, Ella. I don’t want you to get hurt again.”
“We are. We both made mistakes, but we’re working our way through them. You know, he hasn’t changed a bit. Well, he has, but only for the better. I was so stupid not to trust him to understand.”
“You live and learn. That’s what makes you grow. And don’t forget, trust goes both ways. He could have reached out to you.”
“I know. Like I said, we both made mistakes.” I smiled again. “We both think what happened was mostly our fault. That makes it easier to get over. I’ve forgiven him, and I think he’s forgiven me.”
“I just want you to be happy.”
“I know, Daddy.”
He shuffled his feet a moment, looking slightly embarrassed. “I’m supposed to tell you to invite him to dinner some night.”
“Are you okay with that?”
His laugh lines appeared around his eyes as on corner of his mouth twitched up. “It doesn’t matter if I am or not, your mom said invite him.” His smile grew a little. “But, yeah, I’m okay with it. I liked, like, Levi.”
“I tell him when I talk to him tonight. Tell Mom I’ll let her know what he says. It might be a while with harvest coming up.”
“Yeah, she knows. If it doesn’t stop raining, nobody will be doing any combining.”
“Yeah. Everyone is starting to worry.”
“With good reason. Okay, I got to go. I’ll see you this evening.”
“Love you, Dad.”
“Love you too, punkin,” he said. He only called me by the nickname he’d given me as a kid when we were alone. It was our secret, and that made his use of it special.
He went through the door into the shop, ignoring the Authorized Personnel Only sign, just like everyone else.
I didn’t get a lunch break because the farmers ran into town while they were stopped. I peeled the banana that served as my lunch, eating it while I ordered replacements for the parts I’d just pulled, wanting to get my lunch eaten before the rush hit.
I was getting ready to quit for the day and go to my second job when Steve showed up. I hadn’t seen him since Levi ripped him a new one, and that suited me fine. Previously I’d have felt a degree of shame around Steve, but today I felt empowered. That was the effect Levi was having on me. I’d never forgive Steve for what he’d done to me, but he could no longer make me feel ashamed for something I had no control over. What had happened was his fault, not mine.
With Mr. Goodall’s warning buzzing in my head, I smeared a smile onto my face. “How can I help you, Steve?”
“You went out with Levi?” he demanded.
I kept my smile firmly in place. “None of your business.”
“It is if you took Abby with you.”
“Who I date is none of your business.”
“I don’t want him around my daughter.”
“Oh, so she’s your daughter now? After five years, you’re suddenly concerned about her wellbeing? Here’s a news flash for you. I don’t care what you want.”
“I have a right to control who’s around my daughter!”
I snorted in clear disdain. “Funny, you never cared about someone being around her when she and I went somewhere with a guy before.”
“I care now, and I don’t want Levi McCormick around her.”
“Tough.”
“I mean it, Mary Ella.”
“So do I.”
“If you don’t stop, I’ll take her away from you.”
I felt a rush of fear at the thought of losing Abby, but I realized what was really happening. “You’re worried! Levi is back in town and he’s making you look bad.” I smiled. “You think you can take her away from me? I’d love to see you try. You’ve got joint custody, but you’ve not visited her once since you saw her in the hospital. You pretend she doesn’t exist. You’ve never sent her a card, a present, nothing. When’s her birthday?” He hesitated, and my smile widened. “You don’t even know your own daughter’s birthday.” My voice lowered and was full of threat. “Are you really willing to stay home every night, or are you going to have that bitch of a mother raise her? That’s what this town needs, another spoiled, entitled brat like you. So go ahead, try to take her away. I’ll drag you through so much hell you’ll be begging me to stop. I’ll ruin your name and expose you for the fraud you are. So go ahead, Steve, take your best shot if you think you’re man enough.” Oh my God, that felt good!
He stared at me, his mouth slightly agape, as if he couldn’t believe I’d stood up to him. He tried to recover. “I was man enough for you that night.”
If he was going to lob them up there, I was going to swing for the fences. “And yet I can’t even remember it. I wonder if it’s because you have a tiny little penis or are a two-pump chump. You’ll have tell me because I really don’t know.”
“Fuck you, you bitch!”
I had him rocked back on his heels, so I bored in. “Sorry, you’re not my type. I prefer real men, like Levi, not some guy who can only get laid if the woman is passed out.”
For a moment I thought he might hit me, but I stood by ground, silently daring him to take his shot. This was Texas, and in Texas real men don’t hit women. If he did, every man in town would know him for what he was.
His mouth hard, he spun on his toe and stomped out, banging the door open savagely hard. He wasn’t even out of sight when the shakes started. I sat down on the stool at my computer and took several deep breaths, trying to calm myself. In hindsight, I had taken a hell of a risk, goading him like I did. Steve was no Levi, but he wasn’t exactly a hundred-pound weakling either. If he’d hit me, it would have hurt like hell.
It only took a couple of minutes for me to gather myself. Now that the danger was past, the shakes quickly subsided. Taking a deep breath, I stood as Marcy appeared to collect the tickets.
“Ella? You okay? You’re pale as a ghost.”
I forced a smile and reached into my basket for the tickets. “Fine. Here you go.”
Marcy took them and returned to accounting. If she’d been two minutes sooner she would have had another juicy bit of gossip as I’d verbally slapped Steve around.
I walked to my Escape, hurrying as I tried to stay dry. In the ten minutes since Steve left, I’d completely recovered. I was feeling like Wonder Woman, powerful and strong. I’d stood up to Steve in a way I never had before, and it felt terrific.
I debated calling Levi to see if he wanted to have a coffee after I got off from Dolly’s. As I drove to the café, I decided that probably wasn’t a good idea. If he so much as kissed me, I’d probably drag him back to my place, rip his clothes off, and fuck him on the spot.
Not just fuck him, oh no. I’d wear his good-looking ass out! I smiled at my wanton thoughts. I remembered our last time together, when we’d made love under the trees at Stamford Lake. He’d fucked the absolute shit out of me. No other man had been able to match the intensity of that experience. I wasn’t so naïve to think he hadn’t had other women after me. He was five years older, even better looking, and more experienced. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to stand a more intense sexual experience. However, I wanted him to take me flying with him, and I didn’t mean in an airplane.
