I'm Not in Love (Once Upon a Winter Book 2)
Page 9
‘The train’s not for ages, is it?’ Hannah asked. ‘You don’t have to go just yet, do you?’
‘I wanted to get there early,’ Gina replied, glancing furtively at Ross. But not so furtively that Hannah didn’t see it and understand its meaning straightaway.
Right… so they wanted to pull over somewhere and have a chat… or whatever… Hannah couldn’t blame them for that either, considering that they didn’t know when Gina would next be here, or whether Ross was quite ready for a trip to Birmingham and all that represented in their budding new relationship. She supposed she’d feel the same way too, and she’d want to make the most of any stolen moments. Her thoughts strayed to Mitchell… but then she pushed them firmly out of her mind. Stolen moments anywhere with him were strictly off-limits from now on.
She reached for Gina and gave her a quick hug. ‘Do you have all your stuff?’
‘It’s not like I can’t get it back if I don’t, is it?’ Gina smiled. ‘Unless you’re planning a car boot sale?’
‘I might,’ Hannah grinned. ‘You have some dresses that I’m sure would fetch a couple of quid.’
‘Help yourself, then,’ Gina winked. ‘Thanks for a brilliant, if slightly surprising, weekend.’
‘I should be thanking you for coming,’ Hannah said. ‘I’m going to miss you next week.’
‘It won’t be long until I’m back for good.’
‘I hope so,’ Hannah said, unexpected tears springing to her eyes. ‘I really can’t wait until you’re down the road.’
‘Me neither.’ Gina turned to Ross. ‘We’d better get going.’
He nodded.
‘Look after her,’ Hannah told him, and she hoped he understood that she meant so much more than just the trip to the station.
*
There was a time when Hannah would have found cleaning the house therapeutic, a chance to lose herself in the task and solve whatever problem was bothering her. But today, alone again after Gina’s departure the day before, and with her head whirling from the sort of weekend that would try the easiest going person, housework wasn’t having its usual effect on her nerves. Hannah switched off the hoover and wandered into the kitchen to put the kettle on. She didn’t really want tea, but made it anyway. After raiding the biscuit tin for something to go with it, and then feeling guilty about the number of biscuits she’d eaten before she remembered to stop herself, Hannah decided to go and run a bath. She felt like an autumn leaf, spinning to the ground, buffeted by whatever winds decided to snatch it from its course and hurl it who knew where. Perhaps for the first time in her life, Hannah felt powerless to influence her own course.
The best thing about living and working alone was that if she wanted to stay in bed one morning and start work at noon, she could, as long as all deadlines were met. So when she finally sat down to her computer at three that afternoon, it wasn’t anything out of the ordinary. She could always work on into the evening if it suited her and things would still get done. But today, it might have been wise if she’d started first thing after all. The laptop had barely booted up when there was a knock at the front door. Hannah let out a sigh. There were some days when she just had to accept that things weren’t going to go her way, and some Januarys that should probably be scrapped and started over.
She made her way to the front door, expecting it to be George popping over to see her with Trixie, or her other neighbours, Brian and Cynthia, back from their holiday home in Greece and short of a bottle of milk or a cup of sugar. Either way, she wished she looked a little more presentable. She pulled her thick woollen cardigan around her and smoothed her hair, gathering together the rogue strands and retying her ponytail before opening the door.
‘Ross?’ she said, a faint note of surprise in her voice. ‘I didn’t expect to see you today. Everything ok?’
‘Yes… I…’ Ross shoved his hands in his pockets with an awkward smile.
‘Would you like to come in?’ Hannah asked, sensing him tussle with whatever subject he wanted to broach. She guessed it was probably something to do with Gina.
‘It’s ok… you’re probably busy… I just wanted to ask… I should have phoned before I came over…’
‘Ross, it’s alright. You didn’t interrupt anything. What’s the matter?’
There was a pause. Then, ‘You’re ok with me and Gina, aren’t you?’ The words almost tumbled out. He looked so uncertain, so lost, so utterly dependent on her answer that Hannah couldn’t help giving him a warm smile. He had asked for her approval when many wouldn’t have cared either way, and she knew that it really mattered to him what she thought. He might be far too young, and there was probably more stacked against them than most, but looking at him right now, Hannah was left in no doubt about the honesty of his intentions. Ross was a lovely man, and if they made it, Gina could be very happy indeed. Was that a little tinge of envy scratching at her gut? Maybe, but if there was a happy ending for Gina, surely she deserved it after everything she’d been through, and how could Hannah deny her that?
‘Of course I’m ok,’ she said. ‘But I’ll warn you that she can be a handful.’
Ross broke into a more certain smile now, all traces of anxiety gone. ‘I’ll try to remember that.’
‘Are you sure you don’t want to come in?’
‘No, I should be getting back… early start tomorrow and all that.’ He stamped his feet in the cold, his breath curling into the air. Dusk was already creeping in, and new flakes of snow floated down from a lilac sky.
It was then that they both turned at the sound of a car engine out on the lane. They watched as a black Volvo pulled up outside Hannah’s gate. And then Hannah caught her breath as Mitchell climbed out. He stopped when he saw Ross.
‘I’m sorry… am I interrupting?’ Mitchell asked, hovering at the gate.
Ross glanced at Hannah, asking a silent question.
‘It’s ok,’ she said. ‘I’ll catch up with you tomorrow if you still want to talk.’
‘Thank you,’ Ross said, ‘that sounds good.’ He gave Mitchell a brief nod as he passed, and Mitchell made his way up the drive to Hannah. They both watched for a moment as Ross drove off.
‘Are you ok?’ Mitchell asked.
‘I could ask you the same thing. I didn’t think I’d see you again after the dance.’
‘Why not? Didn’t I make my feelings clear enough?’
Hannah sighed. ‘More than, but I thought I had made my answer clear too. I’m not prepared to get involved in such a complicated situation…’ In the cold light of day, Hannah’s resolution was stronger than ever. How could she go down this road? It would only bring heartache.
‘I was hoping…’
‘I’m sorry if I let you think there was hope, because there is none. At least not while you’re married.’
There was a pause. ‘That’s just it…’ he said finally, holding Hannah’s gaze. ‘I’ve left Martine.’
To be continued in Part Three: Ways to Say Goodbye
About the Author
Tilly Tennant was born in Dorset, the eldest of four children, but now lives in Staffordshire with a family of her own. Tilly is married to Mr Tennant (not that one, though a girl can dream). After years of dismal and disastrous jobs, including paper plate stacking, shop girl, newspaper promotions and waitressing (she never could carry a bowl of soup without spilling a bit), she decided to indulge her passion for the written word by embarking on a degree in English and creative writing, graduating in 2009. She wrote a novel during her first summer break at university and has not stopped writing since. She also works as a freelance editor, and considers herself very lucky that this enables her to read many wonderful books before the rest of the world gets them.
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Also by Tilly Tennant
Hopelessly Devoted to Holden Finn
The Man Who Can’t Be Moved
Mishaps and Mistletoe (the inspiration for the Mishaps from Millrise series)
Mishaps in Millrise – Parts 1-4 Omnibus
And writing as Sharon Sant
The Memory Game
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The Sky Song Trilogy:
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Not of Our Sky
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