Anathema

by Megg Jensen

  “I’ll miss you too, Johna,” I hugged my mentor. My chest tightened. I breathed deeply, holding back the tears I knew were forming against my will. I wouldn’t cry in front of these people, no matter how afraid I was of the changes I was about to make.

  “How can we help?” Tania asked.

  “I was hoping you would say that,” I said, turning to her and glad of the distraction. “Can we borrow your two cloaks? The ones you used to rescue me the day of my birthday? You’ll have to teach me the spell, though. I don’t know how to make them work like you did.”

  “Of course! I just wish I was in one of them,” she said.

  “You’re going to be,” I said. “If you’ll say yes, that is.”

  “Really? I would love to help out,” Tania exclaimed.

  “Since you’ve already rescued me once, I was hoping you’d do it again. Once I get back in the castle, I’ll need a way out. You’re the only person other than me who knows the way and I can’t carry the cloak with me when I’m arrested. I need you.”

  “I am more than happy to help,” Tania said. “It won’t be too hard. Jon and I have been contracted to bring fresh vegetables to the castle the morning of the wedding. I’ll already be in the gates.”

  “Fantastic,” Mark said. “That morning, I’ll meet you outside the kitchens and let you know where they’re holding Reychel. Then you can get her out just like last time.”

  “Sounds easy enough.” Tania snapped her fingers. “Hard would have been fine too.”

  “How is Reychel going to turn herself in?” Nemison asked. “We can’t risk anything happening to her.”

  I grabbed Mark’s hand again, taking a deep breath.

  “Mark is going to take me in the morning of the wedding. I’ll be his prisoner.”

  Johna raised an eyebrow. “Can you do that Mark? Can you hand her over to Kandek so easily?”

  “I have to.” He squeezed my hand. “I can’t imagine letting anyone else do this. It has to be me.”

  “We’re also hoping that taking in both Roc and me in one week will give him a place of honor at the wedding. He can always make a distraction in case something goes wrong,” I said.

  “It’s a bold plan,” Nemison sighed, “but it won’t work.”

  “Why not?” Mark challenged.

  “Your feelings for each other will get in the way. One of you will make a mistake,” he said.

  “We’re just friends,” I insisted.

  Nemison let his gaze linger on our clasped hands.

  “Just advice to children from an old man.”

  “I’m not a child,” Mark said. “Neither is Reychel. People our age marry every day.”

  “Most people your age don’t have such complicated lives,” Johna said. “Neither of you has ever been normal like two kids from neighboring farms who’ve been betrothed since birth. Nemison is only trying to protect you.”

  “We will take your opinion into consideration,” I said, letting go of Mark’s hand. Now wasn’t the time to show affection, even if I felt like I needed reassurance. “But it won’t be a problem. I promise.”

  “If you need us,” Nemison said, “you only have to call. But until that day, I think we should all go home.”

  He turned toward the only wall that wasn’t covered with herbs and waved his hands in the air. A portal appeared on the wall, just high enough for the tallest person to duck through.

  My eyebrows rose as I glanced at Mark. It seemed there was much more to learn. I looked forward to seven days from now when this mess would be over and I would begin my training with Nemison.

  As the gifted began to file through the portal, Tania ran over and hugged me.

  “I’ll see you in six days, my friend,” Tania said. “Until then,

  stand strong. It will work, I know it will.”

  “It has to,” I replied. “And you, try not to be too excited.”

  Tania laughed as she ran through the portal. After the last of the eleven visitors left, I turned to Johna.

  “I always wondered why there weren’t any herbs hanging on that wall. I thought it had something to do with humidity.”

  “Things are not always as they seem, child.” Johna laughed.

  “I didn’t know that anyone could do that,” Mark said. “Read Reychel’s mind and create a portal, I mean.”

  “Most of us can’t do anything that grand,” Johna said. “Nemison is very strong. Reychel will probably equal if not surpass him.”

  She stared at Mark.

  “Drop those walls. I want to see how gifted you are,” Johna demanded.

  Mark sighed and looked Johna in the eyes. He blinked and I saw the spark appear.

  “You are very strong too,” she said. “Very strong.”

  “I’m more interested in the strength of my body and my steel,” Mark said.

  “Very well,” Johna shrugged. “No one’s asking to train you anyway. Reychel is special. But you already know that.”

  “Yes, I do,” Mark smiled at me.

  I couldn’t believe it, but a light blush crept across my cheeks.

  17

  “I love you,” he said, gently kissing her cheek. The tears spilled down, but she ventured a smile.

  “I love you too. Come back soon.”

  “It’ll only be a few days.” Roc stroked the hair on his infant daughter’s head. She was lying in her mother’s arms, unaware that her father was about to voluntarily put himself in prison.

  “Da, why do you have to go?” Sara asked.

  “It’s for work, baby girl,” he said. “I’ll be back in a few days. Just like I told your ma. I promise.”

  Sara flung her arms around Roc’s legs. “Miss you Da.”

  “Miss you too. Now you be a big girl and put away those tears.” He peeled her off of his leg and wiped away one tiny tear. “Just think, while I’m gone you’ll have Lena here to play with. She’s fun. You’ll have a great time.”

  Sara looked up at me with her big, trusting eyes. I’d taken the name Lena to protect my identity and Roc’s family. Everyone would be searching for a Reychel. We hoped my new name wouldn’t cause people to look twice at the new servant girl. If they didn’t care enough to look at me, then they wouldn’t see the amber of my eyes. Roc assured me they wouldn’t have many visitors. They were a quiet family and kept to themselves.

  “Are we friends now?” Sara slipped her hand in mine.

  “Of course,” I said. “I’m your friend and I’m going to help your ma while your da is away.”

  Roc’s wife, Bree, glanced up at me. I nodded my head slightly, but Bree couldn’t quite look me in the eye. I felt bad that Roc was walking into danger because of me and that Bree would have to live without him for a few days. It couldn’t be easy. I would have to find a way to reward her sacrifice when this was all done.

  “I’ll be right back,” I said to Sara. She let go of my hand and turned back to her mom and baby sister. “I’m going to walk them out.”

  I followed Mark and Roc out the door. My hands shook as I grasped the handle to close the door behind me.

  “Are you sure about this?” I asked Roc. “Once you turn yourself in, there’s no going back. If something should go wrong…”

  “Nothing will go wrong, Reychel,” Roc said. “I think we have a great plan. I can’t imagine what could mess this up. Trust us.”

  “Neither can I,” Mark said. “Everything will go according to plan. Kandek will let the prisoners go when he has you. Roc will escape with them, Tania will let you out and I’ll meet everyone back in here a couple days later. What could go wrong?”

  “Everything,” I said.

  “Or nothing,” Mark said, trying to reassure me.

  “Okay, I’ll stop now.” I held up my hand in surrender. “You two be careful.”

  “We will.” Roc nodded toward his house. “I have too much to live for to screw this up.” He looked at his front door as if he was reconsidering his decision. “Okay, let’s go now. Be
fore I change my mind.”

  Roc laughed and patted Mark on the back.

  I watched them walk off, my heart pounding.

  After a few days of changing dirty diapers, preparing meals, and cleaning up after Sara, I needed a break. Keeping a house was more taxing than being a slave. It required me to be alert every moment I was awake and even when I was sleeping, I’d hear baby Marie wake up to feed. Bree was exhausted. I could see that much so I tried to do anything I could to help ease the burden. It was the least I could do after taking her husband away from her. She didn’t even know the reason I was staying with her. Her trust in Roc was enough of a reason.

  Sara, on the other hand, felt I was her new, twenty-four hour playmate. Not that I minded, Sara was a joy to be around. But Johna would be arriving soon to take over my duties until we brought Roc home. In the meantime, Mark and I would be making our way back to Kandek’s castle.

  Though we had grown closer, I was a little worried about being alone with him. We hadn’t been truly alone since the night we’d accidentally met in the dark and I’d learned his secret. Since then we’d been surrounded by people like Johna and Roc or even just groups of villagers in the town.

  It had been easy to focus on everything but my feelings for Mark in the last few days. I knew I felt something for him, but what exactly I wasn’t sure. It was different than what I’d felt for Grey. Unlike Grey, I knew Mark returned my feelings. He’d been honest about how he felt. There were no games, no flirtations. It was real, honest. It scared me.

  I was also anxious to rip the wig off my head. Since Bree didn’t know who I was, I couldn’t take off my wig for one moment, not even when I slept. Bree might be up and about the house at any time of the day or night taking care of the baby. Luckily she trusted Roc enough not to ask who I was, but accepted me and my help without question.

  A knock at the door interrupted my thoughts and I smiled as Johna poked her head through the doorway.

  “Anybody home?” she called.

  “Johna, come on in.” I pulled my friend into the house.

  We embraced and I buried my face in her hair. I’d missed her so much. In many ways she had been like a mother to me, the first woman to love me unconditionally. We pulled away and she nodded at me, a twinkle in her eye.

  “You look tired.”

  I laughed. “I am. I never knew how much work went into keeping a family running. It’s been a busy week.”

  “It’s time to take your leave now,” Johna whispered. “Mark is waiting for you at my cottage.”

  Nodding, I walked into the next room where Bree sat with the baby.

  “I have a family emergency and have to go back home,” I explained to Bree, “so Johna’s going to stay with you until Roc gets back.”

  “There’s more going on than you’re telling me.” Bree cradled little Marie in her arms. “I know that Roc’s work isn’t always legal.”

  Johna glanced at Bree, her shoulders tense. She gazed into Bree’s eyes, presumably reading her mind. She must have not found anything threatening because her shoulders relaxed back to their normal position.

  “Aye,” Johna answered. “He isn’t gone looking at a horse as he told you.”

  “Can you tell me what he’s doing?” Bree asked.

  “No, we can’t,” Johna said, “but he’ll be home in a few days.”

  “Is he safe?”

  “We’ll make sure he is. No man should leave behind a wife and two daughters, especially not one as good as Roc.” Johna sat down across from Bree. “You’ve got a good man there.”

  “I do.” Bree nodded. “I trust him to come back to me.”

  “Good woman,” Johna said. She turned to me. “Go back to my cottage. There’s someone there waiting to escort you home.”

  “Bye, Bree.” I hugged her and the baby. “Tell Sara I love her, okay?”

  “Sure you don’t want to wait for her to wake up from her nap?” Bree asked.

  “I can’t. I have to go now.”

  I waved as I walked out the door. Pulling my hood over my wig, I took a deep breath as I walked back to Johna’s cottage. I knew there wasn’t any going back now. Mark would be waiting for me and we would start our trip back to Kandek.

  Trying not to let my nerves get the best of me, I walked slower. There was no need to draw attention by running through the village. Everyone would wonder where the fire was and then they might start asking questions.

  When I walked through the door of Johna’s cottage, I saw Mark sleeping with his head on the table. I walked up behind him quietly and placed my hand on his back.

  “Mark, I’m here,” I whispered.

  He turned his head sideways and with one eye barely open, stared at me. A smile spread across his face as he sat up, stretching his arms out wide.

  “Sorry, everything’s been happening so fast the past few days. I’ve barely had time to sleep,” he said.

  “It’s fine. I can wait if you want to sleep more before we leave,” I said.

  “No, we need to get moving. I want to have you there by first light tomorrow morning. There’s too much riding on this. We need to be there on time.”

  I noticed a deep, purple bruise next to his eye and I reached out to touch it. He flinched and I only allowed my fingertips to hover over the injury. I didn’t want to hurt him, but I wished that my gift was in healing.

  “What happened?” I asked.

  “I’ll explain later. Right now we should go.”

  Mark threw his cloak over his wide shoulders, held open the door, and bowed in front of me.

  “M’lady,” he said, his free arm outstretched.

  “Stop.” I rolled my eyes.

  I walked out the door with Mark closely behind me. Looking back at the cottage that had been my home for the last few months, I wondered if I would see it again soon, or ever. I knew I promised to report to Nemison, but the thought of not returning to Johna’s home made me sad. Would I ever find a home of my own?

  We walked in silence as we entered the forest. The tree branches crackled as the wind danced between them. Leaves pirouetted to the ground, crunching under our feet. It was as if I’d never traveled this path before, although just a few short months ago Ivy and I had made our escape through here.

  “Shouldn’t I look like your prisoner?” I asked, waving my hands at him.

  “I didn’t think of that,” Mark said. He eyed my wrists and shook his head.

  “If we pass someone on the road, they might wonder why I’m not tied up.” I rubbed my wrist, thinking of the day when Kandek’s guards had tied me up before my branding ceremony. Though the rope burns had healed ages ago, my skin tingled when I thought of it. “Not that I want to be. It’s not comfortable.”

  “I can’t do that to you,” Mark said. “I would feel horrible.”

  “So you’d feel bad tying my wrists together, but you don’t feel bad turning me over to my old master?”

  Mark was about to protest until I grinned. We needed a little humor to lighten the burden of what we were about to attempt.

  “Funny,” he said, rolling his eyes.

  “I have to do something to make light of this,” I said. “I don’t know how to get through it otherwise. I’m beginning to think there’s a limit to my new-found bravery.”

  “You can do it.” Mark rubbed my shoulder. “I’ll be there the whole time watching out for you. Tania is ready to help. Roc is there too.”

  “How did that go?” I asked. “Turning Roc in? Was he okay?”

  “That man is one of the bravest people I’ve ever met,” Mark said, jumping over a fallen tree. “He’s the one who did this, by the way.”

  My eyes grew in shock as Mark pointed to the bruise on his cheek.

  “We wanted to keep things realistic,” he said. “So we struggled in front of Kandek. Roc got a right hook off on me. Knocked me down.”

  I gasped, my hand flying to my mouth. “What?”

  “I actually had to avoid looking in his
eyes after that,” Mark said. “I wanted to laugh.”

  “Laugh?” I asked. “It had to have hurt. I can’t even imagine.”

  “It did hurt,” he said, his shoulder shaking with his laughter. “But I’ve been through military training and Roc knew that. He knows what I can handle. A blow to the eye doesn’t stop a good soldier.”

  “I guess…” I said, wanting to reach out and touch his eye again. I held back, afraid it would hurt him too much.

  “They took him away. It was a bit rough, but he didn’t struggle too much. Kandek was happy with me. Told me he’d double my reward if I brought you in too. Now there’s a stroke of luck. We’ll get some extra money out of this too. The Sons can use it.”

  I ignored his last comment. If he received a reward, it was his to do with as he pleased, but I’d hate for him to give it to an organization whose reputation left both Serenian and Malborn children afraid, even if he did claim to be a member.

  “Did you see his bride?” I asked, changing the subject. “It was a quick engagement. I wonder if it was someone who’d visited before.” I thought of all the royal women with nests in their hair. The rare times I’d seen him holding court he’d never given one more attention than another. It was hard for me to believe he’d fallen for someone so quickly.

  “No, she didn’t seem to be around,” he said. “Who cares who she is? She’s irrelevant as long as she stays out of the way.”

  18

  My eyes fluttered open as the morning sun filtered streaks of light through the trees. I glanced over to Mark’s sleeping sack close by and I saw his shoulders rising and falling in the slow rhythm of sleep. I resisted the urge to sweep his hair from the corner of his right eye. Instead I stretched and tried not to focus on what I was going to do today.

  We had made camp off the road in a clearing. Without a doubt this was not the first time someone had used this campsite. We found remnants of a fire, long burned out, but the ashes remained. Deep in the night I had curled up in my blanket, trying not to think of the task I had waiting for me the next morning. I had felt so brave making the plans, but the thought of following through made my stomach roll. Night captured the woods, leaving us in darkness but for the smoldering fire Mark had built. Soon sleep overcame me.