Day by Day

by Delia Parr

  “Sorry. I forgot. I’ll bring it down with me,” he suggested and started for the stairs.

  “I’ll wait for you to get back before I call.”

  He waved behind him. “Don’t bother. Make the call, leave a message and heat up some cider for us. I’ll be right back.”

  She shrugged, tapped out Lily’s number on the kitchen telephone and carried it with her to the refrigerator to get out the cider. By the fourth ring, she had the cider on the counter and started to fill two mugs. By the seventh ring, she had the mugs in the microwave, anxious for Lily’s voice mail to kick in.

  “Mom?”

  Ginger flinched and frantically looked at the doorway, but Tyler was gone.

  “Mom?”

  “Sorry. Yes, it’s me,” she murmured, just as Tyler picked up the telephone upstairs. “Your father and I wanted—”

  “If you’ve called to apologize for not coming for the weekend, don’t bother. I’ve already started making plans to enroll Vincent in a boarding school, so you won’t be taking care of him anymore.”

  “Actually, Lily, your mother and I have a lot to say to you, and I suggest you listen very, very carefully,” Tyler cautioned from the extension upstairs. “And don’t hang up. If you do, your mother and I will drive through the night to be in Boston in the morning with Vincent, and we’ll be going directly to see your in-laws.”

  Lily hissed. “You wouldn’t dare!”

  “Yes, we would,” Ginger insisted, if only to present a united front.

  “Th-that’s blackmail!”

  “No,” Tyler said firmly. “It’s an ultimatum. Look. All you need to do right now is to listen to your mother. I’m on the cordless phone upstairs. While I check on Vincent to make sure he’s asleep, I can’t say anything, but I’ll be listening. Once I get back downstairs with your mother, I’ll be able to answer any of your questions. Agreed?”

  “I don’t seem to have much choice about anything at the moment, do I?”

  “Yes, you do,” Ginger countered. “As a matter of fact, your father and I have decided there are several choices you can make and we want to discuss them with you. What you choose will be entirely up to you, but you will make a choice. Tonight.”

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Lily’s response to her parents’ demands was as loud as it was shrill. “Are you both out of your minds? I’m thirty-one years old. I’m not a child. You can’t treat me like one and issue ultimatums or threaten me to make me do anything I don’t want to do.”

  “There’s no need to yell. You’re absolutely right,” Ginger murmured. “You’re an adult. You’re a married woman and you’re about to be a mother again very soon. We want you to be happy in your new life, but you can’t continue to turn your back on Vincent and pretend he doesn’t exist. He’s not a pet you’ve outgrown or a friend you can cast aside. He’s your son, your own flesh and blood.”

  “When I met you at the airport, I thought I explained what I was doing. I’m protecting Vincent and providing for him in a way I’d never be able to do on my own.”

  “That’s an excuse, not an explanation. There is no excuse for abandoning Vincent,” Ginger argued.

  “I didn’t abandon him, Mom. He’s with you and Daddy. You’re his grandparents. He’s your flesh and blood, too.”

  “Yes, he is, which is why your father and I cannot and will not allow you to send him away to some year-round boarding school where he’ll grow up alone without you and without us. It’s not an option. Period,” she added for emphasis. She kept her gaze locked on the doorway and prayed Tyler would be here with her soon.

  Lily let out a long sigh. “So that’s what all the fuss is about. Why didn’t you just say so instead of acting like a pair of drill sergeants?”

  The relief in her voice had softened her tone, much to Ginger’s own relief. Putting Lily on the defensive at the start of their conversation was not how she or Tyler had hoped to begin, but there was no undoing that now.

  “I’m sorry I got mad at you for not coming up to visit for the weekend. I shouldn’t have threatened to send Vincent away from you, all right? I’m sorry. I didn’t realize how much you and Daddy wanted to keep Vincent with you. I’ll drop the whole idea of boarding school. Look. I can’t really talk right now. Tell Daddy I’ll call you back in a day or two.”

  “No,” Tyler said on the cordless phone as he entered the kitchen. “Your mother told you that you have some choices to make tonight, and you will,” he insisted as he walked over to Ginger and took her hand.

  “Weren’t you listening? I’ve made my choice. Vincent can stay with you.”

  “I heard every word,” he said and nodded to Ginger to pick up the conversation.

  “We love Vincent, sweetie,” Ginger began. “We love having him in our lives, but our first choice has always been for you to keep Vincent with you. You’re his mother. He needs you. He should be able to grow up with you and with his new baby brother or sister and with Paul. Now that you’re married, Paul should accept his responsibilities as Vincent’s stepfather.”

  “Your first choice? I thought we were talking about me. About my choices,” Lily charged. Her voice tightened. “This isn’t about me at all, is it? This is about you and Daddy. It’s probably about Mark and Denise, too. Some things just won’t ever change, will they? I have my own life to live. You and Daddy can’t keep trying to get into my business, and Mark and Denise need to realize I’m not the baby they can boss around anymore. None of you ever understood that before, so why am I surprised you all don’t understand it now?”

  “Don’t try dragging Mark and Denise into this conversation. Right now, the focus is on you and Vincent and your mother and me,” Tyler warned. “What business are you talking about? Understand what?” he demanded and held up his hand so Ginger would let him continue. “Do you mean what you did after you left teaching your second year in Chicago? Or did you mean we couldn’t possibly understand why you sent Vincent to live with one caregiver after another instead of keeping him with you? I’ve been to Chicago, Lily. I’ve talked with Mrs. Washington and Mrs. Carpatto, just to name two. You’ve never made a home for Vincent before, but that doesn’t mean you can’t do it now. You should do it now.”

  “We’ll help you every way we can,” Ginger offered. Alarmed that Lily had not exploded the moment Tyler mentioned Chicago and his investigation, Ginger tried to fill the silence coming from the other end of the line. “Let us help you, Lily. Please. For Vincent’s sake,” she pleaded.

  When Lily finally answered, her voice was frigid. “Help me?” She snorted. “You spied on me. You invaded my privacy. You investigated my life in Chicago like I was a criminal. How could you? How dare you lecture me on being a good parent?”

  “You didn’t give us much choice,” Tyler replied, “but you do have choices you can make tonight.”

  “Don’t use the word ‘choice,’ Daddy, and don’t lie. I don’t have any choices to make because you and Mom have already made them for me, haven’t you? I wouldn’t be surprised if you told Mark and Denise what you were going to do, just as you always discussed me with them when I did something wrong when I was little. Why can’t all of you—”

  “That’s not true,” Ginger protested, ignoring Lily’s attempt to change the focus of the conversation again.

  “We want you to choose to take Vincent to live with you.”

  “Forget it. My answer is the same as it was six months ago. No.”

  “Then Vincent will stay with us. Indefinitely,” Tyler said, clarifying their grandson’s status for all three of them.

  Lily sighed. “Unfortunately, yes. Vincent can stay with you. But again, with your threat to bring him to Boston still standing, that’s your choice, not mine, isn’t it?”

  Rather than provoke an argument that would only deter them from the greater purpose of their conversation, Ginger ignored Lily’s question. “Your father and I have certain conditions under which Vincent will continue to live with us.”
/>   “Conditions?” Lily cackled. “Now you have conditions?”

  Tyler held on to Ginger’s hand. “You haven’t contacted Vincent for months. You haven’t called or written or acknowledged his existence in any way. That has to change. Once a month, we expect you to write to him or call him. Which will it be?” he asked.

  “I can’t promise to call him,” she protested.

  “Fine. Then you’ll write him a short note. Keep it simple, but be honest. Just tell him you love him and miss him. Don’t make any promises you can’t keep,” Ginger said firmly, keeping her session with the counselor in mind.

  “Send it along with your check each month,” Tyler suggested.

  “Oh yes, the check. I assume you have another choice for me to make about the amount of the check? No. Don’t tell me. Let me guess. You want me to send more so you won’t have to use any of your own money—”

  “Nonsense,” Tyler snapped and let go of Ginger’s hand to wave his in the air. “We don’t touch that money. We deposit that check directly into an account we’ve set up for Vincent.”

  Ginger put her hand on Tyler’s arm to calm him. “I’ve bought some note cards for Vincent to use to write to you. I’m not sure how often he’ll want to write, but—”

  “Don’t mail them to me. I don’t want him to have my address. If he wants to write, keep his note cards there. I can’t afford to have anything like that here. At least you can promise to do that for me.”

  “We don’t even have your new address,” Tyler countered.

  “You’re such a good detective, I’m sure that won’t be a problem. Is there anything else or can I go now?”

  Ginger was so rattled by their conversation, she walked over to the table and glanced at the list she had made. “There’s one more thing.”

  “Surprise. Surprise.”

  “Watch your tone. Don’t be disrespectful to your mother,” Tyler warned.

  When Lily did not respond, Ginger continued. “I want you to send me something of yours that I can give to Vincent. Something small enough for him to hold. If he can’t be with you and he can’t talk with you, he needs something tangible, something concrete to reassure him that you’re real and your love for him is real. It doesn’t have to be anything expensive. Just a trinket will do, but it has to be something he’d recognize as yours.”

  “Where did you get that idea, Mom? Visit a shrink?”

  Ginger held on to Tyler’s arm, this time to keep herself calm. “As a matter of fact, I did meet with a counselor. I wanted to make sure my instincts were leading me in the right direction, but the idea that Vincent might need something of yours to hold wasn’t mine. It was Vincent’s.”

  Lily groaned. “His idea? You talked to him about this? He’s only eight. What could he possibly know about—”

  “I didn’t have to talk to him,” Ginger interrupted. “I just watched him. After school started, he told us he had lost his backpack. When he lost a second one, I found both of the backpacks in the closet in your old bedroom. He’d wrapped them in your old yellow robe. The one you left behind. To be honest, I didn’t think any more about that, even when he tried to run away to find you right before Thanksgiving.”

  “He ran away? Why didn’t you call me and tell me?”

  “Because we found him almost right away,” Tyler replied. “We would have told you when you called again. But you didn’t. Not for Thanksgiving. Not even for Christmas. You didn’t call again until you needed us to come to Boston for the weekend. Without Vincent.”

  No response. Only silence again.

  “When you first told us you didn’t want Vincent to be part of your new life, we thought you would change your mind. We were afraid to do anything to upset you, even when you didn’t call over the holidays. When you did call and told us you were going to send Vincent away to a boarding school because we wouldn’t come to Boston, we were still afraid to do much of anything,” Ginger explained.

  She drew in a long breath. “We’re not afraid anymore. Vincent deserves more from you than what he has now, and we’re both prepared to see that he gets it. Your father and I both pray every night that you’ll realize you want Vincent to be with you one day soon. When you do, we want to do everything we can to make sure that he wants to be part of your life, too. I’m not sure what he’ll need when he’s older, but right now, while he’s still living with us, I just know he needs something from you to hold on to.”

  No response again. Only silence.

  When Ginger looked at Tyler and motioned for him to say something, he shook his head. After several long heartbeats, Lily finally replied. “I’ve packed away most of the stuff I brought with me from Chicago, but I have a few things I kept out. One Christmas, Vincent gave me a pin he’d gotten at school where they had a Secret Santa Shop. I can send you that.”

  Ginger swallowed hard. For all her bluff and bluster, Lily was not quite as hard-hearted as she appeared to be, even to herself. “No. Send him something else. Don’t send him the pin, but you should mention you have it in your note and that the pin is special to you. He probably needs to know you have something he gave you to hold on to, too. What about a bracelet you wore?”

  “I’m not the bracelet queen, Mom. You are.”

  “But you like to wear a lot of rings. Or you used to,” Ginger suggested.

  “I think I have some of those old rings packed away. Wait. There was one he liked a lot. I used to let him play with it.”

  “Send that one,” Ginger urged.

  “I’ll need a little time to sort through the boxes.”

  “Make the time tomorrow and send the ring, along with your note. Make sure you send it to be delivered overnight,” Tyler prompted. “We’re painting Vincent’s room this week and having bunk beds delivered Saturday afternoon. We’d like to give him your note and the ring then, too.”

  “Any other orders?” Lily snapped, her patience now apparently stretched thin again.

  Ginger frowned. “We’re not the enemy, Lily. We’re only trying to do what’s best for your son. It’s not too late to change your mind. Just say the word and we’ll bring him to you.”

  “I know you don’t believe me when I tell you that I’m doing what’s best for him, either one of you, but I am. You don’t have to like it. Just accept it, like I do,” Lily suggested.

  “We don’t like it. But that doesn’t mean we don’t love you. We just don’t like what you’re doing. There’s a difference,” Tyler murmured gently. “Please make sure we have your note and the ring by Friday.”

  “Or else you’ll carry out your threat and bring Vincent to my in-laws. Don’t bother to repeat the details. I got your message loud and clear,” she replied and disconnected.

  Trembling, Ginger hung up the telephone. After Tyler disconnected the cordless phone, Ginger welcomed the support of his arms around her shoulders. “I thought for sure Lily would put up more of an argument,” he murmured and glanced at the paperwork spread out on the kitchen table. “I really think she has no idea what she’s doing by putting Vincent out of her life.” He shook his head. “I’m not even sure she loves him. How can that be?”

  “She loves him,” Ginger argued. “She might have packed him off to us and boxed up most of the remnants of her life in Chicago, but remember what she said she didn’t pack away?”

  He shrugged. “Not really. I was trying too hard not to yell at her for being so selfish.”

  Ginger looked up at him. “The pin. She kept the pin he had given her for Christmas. If she didn’t love him, if she really didn’t care about him, she would have packed up anything and everything that would remind her of him. That tells me Vincent isn’t the only one struggling right now. We just have to have faith and continue to pray for her. It might not be soon, but I have to believe that someday she’ll want Vincent back in her life. When she does, there won’t be enough money in this world to stop her.”

  He cocked his head. “And if she doesn’t?”

  “Then you a
nd I will be here for him,” she whispered.

  “A few years from now, he’s not going to be satisfied with an occasional note that says she loves him and misses him or a little token from her. He’ll want to know more. What are we going to tell him then?”

  She turned, put her arms around his waist and held him tight. “Let’s not worry about that right now. Let’s use the time we have with Vincent to show him how much we love him.”

  He chuckled. “I can’t believe we’re both looking forward to taking the next two days off to paint his room. This time last year we were getting ready to fly to the play-offs, remember?”

  She laughed with him. “Sure I do. I hate to burst your bubble, Gramps, but Vincent did not let you talk him into painting his room green and white because he’s become a die-hard Eagles fan.”

  He pulled his head back to look her in the eye. “I know he doesn’t like football, but he said he liked the team colors.”

  “Sea turtles are green, too,” she teased. “Remember? He told us how much he enjoyed going to the aquarium in Chicago. He likes all kinds of water animals—turtles, fish, dolphins, whales….”

  Tyler sighed. “I think I see some weekend trips coming up. There’s a great aquarium in Baltimore Harbor. I think they run whale-watching cruises out of Cape May, but we’d probably be better off going to Florida to see the manatees. He’d love them.”

  She giggled. “Wait. Wait. Wait! Maybe we should start a little closer to home. The Adventure Aquarium is fifteen minutes away from us. Barbara and John took the twins there recently.”

  He grinned. “And the aquarium is almost walking distance from Campbell’s Field, the minor league baseball stadium. What’s a little visit to the aquarium without a little baseball, too?” he teased. “If we go in the spring, we could ask Vincent to bring his sketch pad along. He could sketch at the aquarium first and then at the baseball stadium later. He might not be crazy about watching the game, but he won’t be able to resist the mascot—it’s a shark! Just you wait. Sooner or later, I’ll change that boy’s mind about sports.”