Lost in You

by Jules Bennett

  Macy held her arms out, her eyes never wavering from his. The hint of a smile curved the corners of Liam’s lips as he wrapped his arms around her and unfastened her bra. The warmth from his bare chest comforted her at the same time anticipation and arousal shot through her.

  Once her bra was discarded, Macy left her arms out, giving him the silent go ahead to remove the final piece. As she stood before him, more exposed than with any other man in her life, Macy didn’t have the fear she’d been so overwhelmed with. Maybe every moment up until now was preparing her for him. Maybe she’d waited all this time for Liam to come back into her life, to show her how she should be treated.

  Macy wasted no time in assisting him out of his clothes as well. She ran her fingertips over the taut ridges on his abdomen. The trembling beneath her touch had her smiling as she glanced up.

  “I thought I was the one who was supposed to be nervous.”

  He gripped her hands, lacing their fingers together as he tugged her to fall against his chest. “You’re supposed to do nothing but relax and let me pleasure you.”

  Oh, the promises held within that bold, toe-curling statement.

  Macy backed up a step until her legs hit the edge of the bed. Sinking down, she reached her arms out.

  Liam braced his hands on either side of her hips. Without saying a word, he covered her lips with his as he eased her back. She settled into the down comforter, but when his weight landed on top of hers, she tensed.

  “Easy,” he murmured against her lips. “Just us, remember?”

  His hand trailed down her side, over her hip, and along her thigh. Back and forth, he stroked her heated skin until she was arching against him. When he placed his hand between her legs, Macy opened, letting him in.

  The way he touched her, pleasured her, loved her was so overwhelming. Macy tossed her head back as Liam made good on his promises. He nipped at her lips, her chin, down her neck to her breast. The sensations rushing through her, over her, were too much. She cried out as Liam lifted just enough, their eyes locking as she shattered.

  Before she ever came down off her high, Liam pulled her with him as he rolled to his back. Instantly, she found herself straddling him, looking down into those captivating eyes. He didn’t turn his scarred side away from her. Perhaps on some level he was exposing himself as well.

  Macy reached out, sliding her fingertip along the edge of the jagged scar. Liam didn’t tense, didn’t look away. He merely gripped her hips and waited.

  “You’re more than I thought I’d find,” she confessed. She didn’t care that she’d said the words without thinking first. She meant them and she wasn’t a bit sorry they were out.

  As she positioned herself over him, Liam kept that firm hold on her hips. She may be in charge, but he was still holding the reins . . . so to speak.

  Before Macy could move, Liam sat up. “Wrap your legs around me. I want to touch all of you.”

  As she shifted, they came together and Macy bit her lip, closed her eyes, and let the new onslaught of emotions take over.

  “Look at me,” he demanded.

  She opened her eyes, not surprised to see his face a breath from hers. Their bodies touched from shoulders down. Macy tightened her hold around his waist, encircled his neck with her arms, and slid down to connect them.

  Just as she started to move, Liam’s fingertips dug into her hips. “No. Not yet.”

  Macy needed to move, she needed . . . something. He was killing her.

  “You good?” he asked.

  Unable to speak, she nodded.

  “Keep looking at me,” he demanded, his voice husky, as if he were suffering just as much. “Don’t take your eyes off me.”

  Keeping their bodies in perfect alignment, Liam stood and turned. “Trust me?”

  Macy threaded her fingers through his hair, keeping his command of eye contact. “Completely.”

  He turned, laying her on the bed as he came down with her. But he didn’t fully press his weight into her. Macy’s arms fell beside her head as he loomed above her. An inkling of fear curled low in her belly. She glanced to the canopy above her bed.

  “Eyes here, Macy.”

  The moment she made contact again, the warmth in his eyes instantly erased the anxiety. She trailed her fingertips up his arms and over his shoulders. As he started moving, everything vanished but this moment. Not once did he look away, nor did he try to put any more of his weight on her.

  Macy curled her hands around his shoulders and urged him down. She wanted to feel him against her, wanted to feel only him and no other memory or nightmare. Liam was it. Now and forever.

  But that was a thought for another time. Right now, she relished the way he braced himself above her, still not fully coming down.

  “I want to feel you, Liam. I’m okay.”

  Resting his weight on his forearms on either side of her head, Liam nipped at her lips as he quickened the pace. Macy opened her mouth, claiming his as her entire body took over. No longer was she in control, but the most glorious feeling of euphoria overcame her. Liam’s delicate touch, yet passionate lovemaking was everything she’d ever needed, and everything she didn’t know she needed.

  When her body climbed, when she trembled with release, Liam tore his mouth from hers and whispered something in her ear. She couldn’t make out what he said, all she knew was she’d never felt this way before.

  Liam tensed, his jaw clenched as he arched back when his own release hit. Macy had never seen such a beautiful sight as Liam above her, his muscles tight, the way he opened those gorgeous, expressive eyes and held her in place. Something passed between them, something Macy couldn’t identify. She knew exactly, without a doubt, how she felt. But if she wasn’t mistaken, love stared right back at her.

  Did she dare hope that he was falling for her? Did she even want to place her heart fully on the line?

  As Liam relaxed, he rolled to the side and pulled her into the crook of his arm. Macy eased her leg over his, wanting to keep the contact, needing to keep the contact.

  Words were useless at this point. Liam had done what she’d always thought impossible. Not only had she fallen in love, she’d overcome her greatest fear.

  * * *

  Liam held on to Macy. Too much flooded his mind right now. The damn nerves he’d had moments ago had now exacerbated. He’d wanted everything to be perfect for her, every touch, every moment to be exactly what she needed. But he’d quickly discovered this wasn’t all about her, like he’d promised.

  The phone call from Sophie had him a jumbled mess. When he’d already been confused over his move back to Savannah, now he had another wrench in the plans he’d so carefully made. Those plans had started crumbling the moment he’d taken the chef position at Bella Vous. They’d been obliterated this evening.

  Macy may not have expected this, but he sure as hell hadn’t known what he was getting into, either. He wouldn’t change a thing . . . except maybe to acquire some insight to tell him what the hell to do next.

  “I was asleep in my dorm when they came in.”

  Macy’s soft tone broke the silence. Her fingertips drew a lazy pattern over his chest as she lay tucked against him. She was about to reveal what he’d both wondered and feared.

  “You don’t have to say anything,” he replied, curling his arm around her a bit tighter.

  “My roommate had gone home for the weekend.”

  She went on as if he hadn’t given her the out. Liam prepared himself for the worst, but reminded himself not to get angry. She didn’t need that right now.

  “My team had just won a huge game against our biggest rival. We went out after for pizza with our friends. A group of guys I’d seen with my other friends were there. I’d never had a problem with any of them before. I mean, they flirted and joked, but they were eighteen years old, so it was just part of college life.”

  Her lashes tickled his side each time she blinked. She continued that random pattern on his skin and Liam waited for he
r to go on. Whatever she had to do to push forward, he’d support. And if that meant saying nothing, then that’s what he’d do—though he wanted to find the bastards and show them what fear was. Liam figured if they did this to Macy, then they’d gone after other women.

  “I jerked awake when one of them fell on top of me,” she went on. “Or maybe he meant to land across my bed. I instantly smelled beer. It was so overpowering it was almost sickening, so I knew they were drunk. I pushed the one off my bed and he fell onto the floor. I still thought they were just being stupid, but I didn’t know why they’d broken in to my room, or how they ever got beyond the dorm mom in the lobby.”

  None of this should’ve ever happened. Ever. And she’d carried this night around with her for years, not telling a soul. How did she intend to recover if she never leaned on anyone?

  Not that he was one to judge, but damn it, he wanted better for her. He wasn’t about to get into all the hell in his own life, or the reasons he kept everything to himself. This was all about Macy, about making her realize she’d overcome that night and there was no reason to ever be afraid again.

  “Before I could even get up, another guy ripped off my covers and started jerking on my pajama bottoms. That’s when I knew if I didn’t make some commotion and fight back, that I’d be their victim.”

  Macy pulled in a shaking breath and kept going like the fierce woman he knew her to be. “I screamed, banged on the wall next to my bed. With it being the weekend, I knew several of the girls had gone home, but I was hoping I’d wake someone. One guy put his hand over my mouth, but I managed to bite him. Then he just held me down while another taunted me about how they’d been deciding who was going to bang the star athlete. When they couldn’t decide, they thought I’d want to do them all.”

  Moisture gathered on his side. The tears she shed pissed him off. Shifting, Liam rolled her onto her back as he lay beside her, his elbow propped by her head as he looked into her misty eyes.

  “I’ve heard enough.”

  “Actually, that’s almost the end,” she informed him with a tight smile. “They didn’t follow through. After I bit the one guy, he fell backward into the other two. I managed to get out the door. I ran down the hall in my panties and T-shirt. I hid in the basement of the building until morning. I was so afraid to come back out for fear they’d be there waiting for me.”

  Liam stroked her hair from her face. He wasn’t sure if he was consoling her or himself by the constant touching, but he couldn’t stop.

  “I was a virgin then,” she admitted. “I was shaking so hard while I was hiding. All I could think was that I would not let any man take away my rights, let alone my innocence.”

  Liam’s heart clenched. The image of a young Macy terrified gripped at him.

  “I finally snuck back to my room, grabbed a bag, and shoved some of my things in it. I didn’t shower, didn’t do anything else, but got the hell out of there. I never went back.”

  “And your mother passed that day.”

  Macy closed her eyes. “She had a stroke that morning before I made it home.”

  The pain she’d endured, essentially alone, was something no person should ever have to go through. Liam framed her face, realizing she probably felt ashamed of what had happened. He was damn proud she’d fought them off and ran. The possible flip side of that story terrified him.

  “You’re the strongest woman I’ve ever known,” he told her. When she lifted her lids, those bright eyes pierced his heart. “To keep all of that in—”

  “Makes me a coward, Liam. You can’t sugarcoat that.” She blew out a sigh and wiped at her eyes. “I just . . . I couldn’t tell my dad, not then. And when he mentioned me returning to school, I just told him I’d take some time off to help at the store. We settled into a nice routine, and that pretty much brings us up to date.”

  She smiled, as if she hadn’t just opened her heart and let him inside the darkest part of her life. The trust she’d instilled in him was humbling. The fact she’d never exposed herself in such a way said so much, and Liam wished he had all the answers. Wished like hell he could see into the future as to what path he should take.

  At a loss for words, he nipped at her lips. When she wrapped her arms around him and shifted her body to edge beneath his own, he found himself settled perfectly between her legs.

  “Show me again,” she murmured against his mouth. “Show me how perfect this is, how perfect we are.”

  Was the answer that simple? Were they perfect for more than just right now? Part of him wholeheartedly believed yes. The other part worried he’d be throwing away everything he’d worked so hard for.

  Then there was the call from Sophie with another proposition he hadn’t seen coming.

  Pushing all of the doubts from his mind, Liam did as he was ordered. Being with Macy made everything else seem so insignificant, but the reality was, he had goals. He had a plan. And one woman had single-handedly turned his world upside down and made him rethink everything he’d ever wanted.

  * * *

  Macy stared at the directions once again. She’d done everything Liam had told her to do. Of course he’d be busy at the resort getting various things prepared for the weekend, but she was failing here. Her mac ’n cheese bites looked like burnt turds.

  Well, the party was tomorrow afternoon and clearly she was going to have to pull an all-nighter to get this done. And by all-nighter, she meant Liam would just have to suck it up and help her when he got off work. She knew he’d done a few small appetizer things at his place. After much begging and a little bedroom coercing, she’d managed to get him to agree to doing more than he originally intended.

  She quickly shot off an SOS text, complete with picture of the round charcoal bites spread out across the wax paper over her island and the counter by her stove. She’d put them in as long as he’d told her to, on the temperature he’d said.

  How in the world had this happened to every single batch? She kept thinking the next pan she put in would be better, but no. She’d even turned the temperature down. And actually the final two batches weren’t as burnt, but they didn’t look healthy. Had she not added enough cheese? Enough milk or butter? Wait, she’d totally forgotten the bacon crumbles . . . not that those would help at this point.

  There was no way she could pull all of this off. What had she been thinking? She should’ve stuck with pizzas like she’d first thought. Who cared if it was the easy way out? She thrived on the easy way out when it came to the kitchen. And who didn’t like pizza?

  When her cell rang, she thought for sure it was Liam ready to make fun of her situation.

  The second she saw the name on the screen, though, her heart kicked into high gear. She didn’t even bother wiping off her hands as she lunged for the phone and swiped the screen.

  “Hello?”

  “Macy, this is Laverne with Children’s Services.”

  Macy gripped the counter. “Yes.”

  “I have a little girl, age ten months, who was just placed in our care. Her mother was in a car accident and there’s no father in her life. A grandmother on her father’s side is the only other relative, but she’s in another state and we haven’t been able to reach her. Would you be willing to take this girl?”

  Nerves, anticipation, worry—they all swirled around in her stomach as she frantically looked for her purse. The back door. That’s where she’d hung it.

  “I can meet you right now.” It wasn’t as if she had anything else going on. The food was ruined and she couldn’t move forward without Liam. And she would’ve dropped everything anyway to bring home an abandoned child. “Where do you want me to go?”

  Laverne gave specifics and Macy realized she was heading toward the garage with no shoes on. She’d waited for this moment for so long, she wasn’t thinking clearly. Granted, she didn’t want any child to have to enter the system and be torn from parents, but that was a reality.

  Laverne said she would discuss more when Macy arrived. Macy hung
up, slid into her favorite pair of cowboy boots, and headed out the door.

  So many scenarios raced through her mind. Would this little girl feel safe here? No matter what else was going on, Macy wanted any child she brought in to have a sense of stability and security. Macy had had a wonderful childhood and she only wanted to offer the same to kids in need.

  Her cell rang again as she headed toward town. Thankfully the meeting place was only a few minutes away, because Macy didn’t know if she’d be able to drive too much farther. Her hands were shaking as she pressed the SPEAKER button on her steering wheel.

  “Hello.”

  “Where are you going?” Liam’s voice boomed through her car. “I saw your taillights as I was coming down your street. Did you not need me anymore tonight?”

  “You have no idea how much I need you, but right now I can’t focus on cooking.” She made a left turn; only one more block to go. “I’m on my way to pick up a little girl and I burnt the hell out of those macaroni bites, so I need—”

  “Wait. You’re picking her up now? Alone? Do you want me to meet you?”

  Macy’s lights cut through the darkness as she turned into the parking lot. There was one other car and she knew exactly who waited on her. A child on Christmas morning wasn’t this excited. There were no words. Macy just hoped she could truly make a difference.

  “No. Let yourself into my house.” She gave him the code and promised to be home shortly. Hopefully he’d do something magical in her kitchen and her father’s party wouldn’t be a disaster.

  Honestly, though. She didn’t care. She knew her father wouldn’t care, either. There was a little girl in need and Macy was making her top priority.

  Everyone would understand.

  “I have to go,” she told him. “I don’t know how long I’ll be, but . . . just . . .”

  “I’ll stay,” he told her. “Go get your girl.”

  Macy swallowed the emotions welling up in her throat. He totally got her. Since a few nights ago when she’d finally opened up to him about her past, they’d been connected in a way she couldn’t explain. But she still hadn’t been able to get him to open up completely. He still kept a measure of distance, which was wise on his part if he was so determined to leave. Lately, Macy was just as determined to get him to stay.