THORN (A Brikken Motorcycle Club Saga Book 4)

by Debra Kayn

  She couldn't even wrap her head around the idea that she could take someone else's life, much less do it. But, she had, and she'd done it without thinking.

  "When is he coming?" whined Nikki.

  "I don’t know," she said softly. "He needs to see his club first."

  "No, he'd want to see me first."

  "Need and want are two different things." She blew her breath out. God, she was a walking disaster of bad advice. "I'm sure he's hurrying as fast as he can to come see you."

  Several seconds passed with both her and Nikki waiting for the man who'd changed their lives. Her stomach tightened and rolled. The longer it took for Thorn to come home, the more nervous she became.

  She swallowed, knowing if she allowed herself, she'd throw up.

  "Listen. Listen. Listen." Nikki quieted and then squealed. "It's a motorcycle. It's him. It's Thorn."

  She jumped from the couch and hurried to the window. Standing beside her daughter, she watched a lone biker ride up the road and turn into the driveway. The familiar shape came into view.

  The long hair, wild and free.

  The black leather vest stretched from one broad shoulder to the other.

  The full beard, separated by the wind.

  Outside of prison, in full biker mode, he took her breath away. It was her Thorn. The man that'd swept her off her feet and gone out of his way to prove that the future he wanted with her was hers for the taking.

  Nikki dashed away from the window. The door opened. Caught between staring at Thorn and stopping Nikki from running in front of his motorcycle, she darted after her daughter.

  She had nothing to worry about.

  Thorn caught Nikki while sitting on his bike. Jessy slowed her steps, taking in the death hold around Thorn's neck and her daughter's loud cries of happiness.

  She stopped several feet away, her gaze connecting with his. Her eyes burned with unshed tears, afraid of scaring him or Nikki with the depth of her need to have him, love him.

  Thorn stood, swung his leg over his Harley, and carrying Nikki, strode straight toward her. Her heart hammered in her chest. For sixteen months, sitting across from him during visits, unable to touch him except for a too short hug as time ended, weakened her.

  She couldn't take a step toward him. Fear of rejection, of not being the woman he'd started out liking, paralyzed her.

  She'd changed.

  Doubts lived with her constantly, burning away at her heart, telling her she didn't deserve him.

  "All right, princess." Thorn stared at Jessy. "How about we let your mommy have my neck for a few minutes."

  Nikki leaned back and looked over her shoulder at Jessy. "Your turn, mommy."

  She nodded, and still, she continued to stand in the same spot. Thorn put Nikki on the ground, whispered something in her ear, and watched her run off toward the house. Only then did Thorn look at her.

  She tried several times to swallow and gave up. "Welcome home."

  His eyes remained on her despite him never seeing the house since she'd fixed it up. She looked at the ground, closed her eyes, and then raised her gaze to him again.

  "I would come to you," she whispered. "But, I think I'd fall flat on my face, and that's the last thing I want to do right now."

  His gaze intensified. "If I touch you, I'm going to want you."

  "We have a problem." She panted.

  "Huge problem," he said, his voice deepened.

  "What do we do?" she whispered.

  "In a few minutes, Sydney's going to pull up with her tribe of kids. I've asked her to entertain Nikki in the backyard. I figured that'll give us at least fifteen minutes and you can show me our bedroom." His eyes warmed.

  She inhaled swiftly. "Seriously?"

  "You're all I've thought about." He tilted his head. "You became my world, and I had that in my hand, and it was taken away. I want it back. If I have to work to get you back to how it was before I went to prison, I will."

  Oh, God. She never wanted him to doubt her feelings. "You don't have to work for it because I want it, too. I love you, honey."

  "Say it again," he said.

  "I love you."

  His eyes flinched, and he waited.

  "Honey," she added.

  His chest expanded. She felt his reaction in the pit of her stomach. Her desperate need to prove nothing had changed when both their lives had derailed over the last sixteen months filled her with adrenaline. She had no idea how to get them back on track, except to pretend that everything was perfect.

  Because he was perfect.

  A low hum of a vehicle approaching failed to distract her. Her body hummed. In the background, she remained aware of Sydney and her kids scrambling out of the crew cab. Thorn telling his sister in law where to find Nikki in the backyard. Because it was Thorn's family, she was okay with them watching her child.

  Then, they were alone in the front of the house.

  "Do we have a bed?" he asked.

  She nodded. "The same one."

  "Is there a door on our room?"

  A giggle fluttered in her chest unable to escape. "Yes."

  Thorn stepped toward her, getting bigger and bigger.

  Chapter Thirty Four

  Thorn stopped in the hallway. Wrapped around him, Jessy trembled. Equal parts nerves and desire left her skin covered in goosebumps.

  "Which one is our room?" Thorn's hands cupped her ass.

  She took her lips off his neck. "Second door on the right."

  It wasn't strange to her that Thorn bought the house and had no idea where he should lay his head at night. It was their normal.

  He stalked into the room and slid her down his body, brushing her against his hard cock. A wild rush of arousal centered between her legs.

  She undid the clip on his vest, shoving the leather to the sides and sliding her hands under the hem of his T-shirt. The heat of his skin warmed her hands, and she leaned forward, dipping her head to kiss his stomach, licking his skin.

  There it was...leather and fresh air clinging to him.

  "Jesus Christ," he mumbled.

  The back of her shirt lifted off her. She pulled back, frustrated at the time it took for him to strip her of her shirt. Wanting to feel him against her, she pressed her upper body against his, working her hands under the leather and sliding his vest off his shoulders until she could throw his club leather toward the bed.

  Thorn reached behind his neck and pulled off his shirt. She sucked in a breath, winding her arms around his neck.

  He captured her lips.

  His beard tickled her chest.

  Strong, thick fingers slid between her stomach and her jeans, and instantly the fabric pulled away. She kicked out with her legs until her pants were off and Thorn walked her backward to the bed.

  He tore his mouth off her. "Still have my condoms?"

  "Under the bed." She sat on the mattress and reached under the frame.

  Thorn slid his pistol under the pillow, unbuckled his belt, and pushed down his jeans. "Need inside you, sweetheart."

  She leaned back on the bed until her head hit the mattress. He opened and rolled on a condom. Seeing how much he wanted her, his hands on his cock, and knowing any second, she'd have his weight on top of her, excited her.

  He looked up, connected with her, and lowered himself between her legs. She framed his face with her hands, having a hard time believing that he was here when she'd gone so long without him.

  "I've missed you." Her chest seized and shook, desperately holding on to her emotions. "You have no idea how much."

  He pressed his cock against her, rocking back and forth without entering her pussy. "I know."

  She brought his head down and kissed him, taking his tongue and sucking. He slid his cock inside of her. Whether her legs quivered or his body shook, she held on to him.

  "Damn," he said against her lips, holding himself deep inside of her.

  His control wavered in his breath. She sprawled her hands on his sides.
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  "Don't hold back. I need you, too," she whispered.

  When she gave him his freedom, he took her with such determination and force, she could only hang on to the storm blowing and crashing down on her. The deep well of wanting someone to take care of her filled, strengthening her.

  All the months of barely sleeping and never freely talking to the one person who understood what she'd lived through, what he'd lived through, suddenly exploded in a frenzy.

  Her orgasm rippled through her, pulling him closer. Caught between breathlessness and freedom, she hung on and absorbed his climax as he hardened even more inside of her.

  Thorn lowered his head to her neck. She cradled him, already planning ways to make up for the trouble she'd caused to his life.

  "Good to be home." He kissed her neck, lifted his head, and smooched her lips. "We need to take care of Nikki, but as soon as she's asleep, I'll want you again." He captured her mouth, stroking her with his tongue. "And, again."

  She smoothed back his hair. "We'll wear her out. Switch the clocks forward. Feed her early."

  "That'll work." He chuckled, pushing off her. "Where's the bathroom?"

  "Next door on your left."

  "We'll have to have a bathroom added to our bedroom." He looked around the room as he removed the condom. "You never bought furniture?"

  "No." She reached for her top. "All the money you had Jett take out of your account is in an envelope. I didn't want to spend any unnecessarily. Just enough to make the place livable."

  "I told you to fix the house up. That meant everything."

  "Well, if we're staying together, you can give me your opinion on what you'd like," she said.

  "If we're staying...?" He tilted his head. "What the fuck does that mean?"

  Not meaning to spoil his homecoming, knowing he was opinionated about their relationship but knowing she had to prepare herself once living with her became his normal, she grabbed her jeans and got dressed without discussing her feelings.

  What mattered the most was that he was free from her crime.

  She stepped in front of him and kissed him. "I'll go out and relieve Sydney from her babysitting duties and put together lunch for you. I have a mashed potato and meatloaf casserole that needs heated—your mom told me it's your favorite and dropped it off yesterday."

  "Yeah, sounds good." He watched her too carefully.

  She smiled and hugged him tightly. "I so glad you're home."

  Before he could respond, she hurried out of the room. Unashamed for wanting time with Thorn alone, she spoke with Sydney and thanked her for coming by and watching Nikki. Then, she diverted her daughter from rushing to Thorn's side by asking her to help set the T.V. trays up in the living room.

  Chapter Thirty Five

  The music blared inside the Brikken clubhouse. Thorn lifted the beer bottle to his lips and sensed Jessy stepping away from him. He hooked her arm, bringing her back to his side.

  She leaned against him. "I'm just going to check on Nikki."

  "She's fine." He kissed her forehead.

  It'd taken two days of convincing her to go to his homecoming party at the clubhouse. She'd given him every excuse that Nikki wasn't up to being there at night when it was dark. Afraid it would set Nikki back from her full recovery, she'd tried to bargain her way out of attending by promising blow jobs every night for a week straight.

  "The music and noise might scare her." The lines between her brows deepened. "I'll only be a minute. I want to peek in and make sure everything is okay."

  He shook his head, pulled out his cell phone, and typed a message to Sydney asking about Nikki. Then, handed her the phone.

  Several seconds later, she gave him the cell back when it was obvious that Sydney replied. "She's fine."

  "Told you that." He brought her around to his front and embraced her. "I'd hear her if she wasn't okay."

  It wouldn't matter what kind of noise there was around him. Nikki's cry was branded in his head. He'd sense her needing him.

  Thin arms circled him from behind. Without letting go of Jessy, he looked over his shoulder and found Stassi.

  He slid his hand into Jessy's, freeing an arm, and grabbed his little sister. "What the hell are you doing in here?"

  Stassi squeezed him tight and peered up at him. "I snuck in while Chief and Mom are playing pool. Welcome home, big brother."

  "It's good to be back." He tugged her hair, tilting her face. "What's with all the makeup?"

  "Do you like it?" his youngest sister asked.

  He grunted. At sixteen years old, Stassi was growing up too fast.

  Stassi crooked her finger for him to get closer. He leaned down, and she kissed his cheek. "I love you," she said.

  "Love you too, sister," he said. "Now, get out of here before you start any fights because you're too beautiful."

  She batted her eyes. "I wouldn't."

  "You have before." He narrowed his gaze.

  "Really?" She grinned.

  He lifted his chin and growled. Stassi waved over her shoulder as she hit the door. Damn, he'd missed her. She'd grown up. One of these days, he'd need to face the fact that some asshole was going to be the center of her world, and he wasn't ready.

  "Where's Jackie?" he asked Jessy, knowing the two of them had grown close.

  "She's working at the hotel and mentioned she'd stop by the house tomorrow and see you." Jessy lowered her hand and slipped her fingers into his back pocket. "Where did your mom go?"

  "She's over watching Chief and Johanna play pool." He lifted his bottle and pointed when D-Con, Freddy, Cash, and Shore physically separated him from Jessy.

  "Listen up," bellowed Cash, raising a bottle. "We need a drink to celebrate Thorn."

  The room quieted and the music shut off. Thorn looked at Jessy and raised his brows. Used to how the club members celebrated a brother's return from prison, he wasn't sure she'd understand that it was more about loyalty and brotherhood than the actual homecoming.

  Cash raised the whiskey above his head. "To Thorn, our brother. We've used your bed, your women, your cash. Welcome back!"

  Jessy's gaze flickered around the room as cheers went up. He stepped toward her and found arms pulling him back. The bottle thrust into his chest.

  As the crowd closed in on him, urging him to drink, he spotted Jessy turning and hurrying out of the room. He lifted the whiskey and barely took a drink before shoving it toward someone else.

  D-Con slapped him on the back. Shore slammed him into a headlock and kissed his head. Over three hundred members attended the party, and the room vibrated with good cheer. He raised his hand, wanting to end the celebration.

  Making eye contact with his dad, he motioned with his chin. Someone needed to stop Jessy from being upset. The men meant nothing. They were only harassing him to show they cared.

  Pushed over to a table, another drink was put into his hand. Before he swallowed, he bellowed, "Jessy."

  She belonged here, celebrating with him. Nikki was safe for the night. He'd take care of both of them, whether he had a couple drinks to celebrate or not.

  Jett handed him a lit cigarette. He waved it off and stood. Olin blocked his path.

  "I need to leave," Thorn said.

  "Party has only been going a couple of hours." Olin tipped back a beer. "What's your hurry?"

  "Jessy," he muttered, striding away from the crowd of people.

  He broke through the men and looked down the hallway. Not seeing her, but knowing she'd come this way, he knocked on the daycare room.

  Kylie answered and broke out into a smile at seeing him. "Hey, Thorn. Welcome back."

  "Thanks." He looked past her and found Nikki playing with the kids in the corner near the playhouse. "Have you seen Jessy?"

  "Not since she dropped Nikki off." Kylie closed the door and said, "Is something wrong?"

  "No. I'll find her. Thanks." He stalked down the hallway.

  The meeting room door ajar, he stuck his head inside and found Jessy
and Chief standing by the window. Going by each of their expressions, the topic of their conversation was serious.

  "Hey." He stepped into the room. "What's up?"

  Chief patted Jessy's shoulder. "Taking a breather. Those fuckers in there stink up the room."

  He studied Jessy. She wouldn't meet his eyes.

  Chief passed him on his way out, slapping his shoulder. "Keep your foot down on the corners until you get used to the ride, son."

  His father wasn't giving him riding lessons on his Harley.

  He walked to Jessy and hooked his finger underneath her chin, forcing her to look at him.

  "The men were only talking shit. The women...well, they hang out here and fool around with a lot of the members." He dipped his knees to look deeper into her eyes. "You're the only woman I've loved."

  "It doesn't matter," she said.

  "It does." He inhaled deeply, bringing her to his chest. "Because it bothers you."

  "Of course, you've had other women. You've been alive a lot longer than me," she muttered. "It's not that."

  "Then, what is it?"

  "Ed belonged to the club, and he came here. What he did at the parties was more important than his daughter. I can see why. The whole brotherhood mentality and good times, and yes, women." She lifted her head, pulling away from him. "He couldn't put his daughter first in his life."

  "Hang on, now. I'm not here for—"

  "I killed him," she whispered, right before she walked out of the room.

  Fuck.

  He couldn't blame her for shoving him in the same circle as her ex-boyfriend. Hurrying out of the room, he caught her in the hallway, outside the daycare room.

  "Come with me." He hooked her arm and forced her to go with him back to the main room.

  She'd never accept him at his word. In her head, she believed one thing—rightly-fucking-so—after dealing with Nikki and Ed.

  "You see Jett?" He looked across the room seeing his oldest brother reach out and take Sydney's hand, who'd taken a break from watching the kids. "You know their kids. Do you think they're neglected?"

  Jessy remained silent.

  He pointed to the opposite side of the room. "Remember, Olin and Ashley's kids are in the daycare room with Nikki. Right now, the two of them are talking with Tressa and Curly, who rarely come to any parties but make it a point when someone walks out of prison to come and shake the person's hand. Curly's been a member for almost as long as my dad."