Dreamer

by Dave Gordon

  “Do not trouble yourself,” he says in human speech, “This sadness is not of your making. You have acted out of love. That is all that may be asked of you. You have chosen to live among us of your own free will. The sacrifice you make has not gone unnoticed. You will live out your life in the company of the one you love. She, however, has transgressed too deeply. She will forever be an outcast. After you leave this world, she will leave this realm.”

  Ty turns and walks slowly from the hall, her head up. I follow. The magic of the surroundings has lost its luster. I sense she is not of a mind to discuss the events. We walk for miles. We leave the soft forests and rise into scrub. The air is sweet with the smell of blooming heather, but I am no longer entranced. Things have taken a foul turn. Ty would have stopped to comfort me if the situation were anything but dire. I follow her into the rocky brush fields at the feet of the mountains. She finds her way to a high meadow. Tiny strawberries dot the ground. The plants struggle to take root in the arid, sandy soil. Plumes of blowing snow billow from the peaks.

  Ty stops walking. She stands with her hands clenched at her side. She turns at last to look upon the beautiful valley below. Flocks of birds swirl in the distance. The sun glistens off the surface of the countless rivers and lakes. The soft pleasures below make our stark surroundings stand out in sharp relief. I can feel Ty sinking. I think she is about to collapse. I grab her by the shoulders and pull her close.

  “You have forsaken everything for me,” I say, “It is more than I would ever have willingly asked of you. If sorrow be our fate, then let us cling to each other and face it together.”

  I pull her close. She begins to sob, gently at first. She has lost her battle and succumbs to her sadness. She cries for the loss of her people, for the loss of many loved ones, for the knowledge that she shall never again walk the forest paths of her home. She goes limp I hold her close as we fall to the ground. It has been centuries in coming and now it is torn from her in heaving sobs.

  We sit locked together as she cries tears that do not cleanse, do not heal. These are the tears of death.

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  * * *

  Chapter 13

  Redemption

  Siln walked into the sitting room whistling a cheerful tune. Van marveled at her change of character. It seemed as though she had willed herself to be a different person. She no longer insulted or hit him. She didn't have any fits of temper. She had sharply curtailed her drinking. He hoped it lasted.

  She stubbed her toe on a chair as she walked into the kitchen. “Ow!” she cried as she hopped on one foot while holding the other. “Oh, man. That hurt,” she said. The old Siln would have picked the chair up and smashed it against the wall. She leaned against the wall rubbing her toe. She continued on about the business of making lunch for them both. That was another dramatic change. She did things for him now. Little things like make him lunch. That was very different.

  “You know, it's alright to be angry when you stub your toe. It's not healthy to keep everything bottled up inside,” Van called from the sitting room.

  “What bottled up?” she said. “It was just a stubbed toe. It's fine now.” She brought the plate of synth meal to Van and sat down beside him. “The banquet is coming up, what are you going to wear?”

  “I thought maybe some armor and a sword.”

  “I'll put on a maiden's dress so I look like I need saving.”

  Van laughed at the thought of Siln in a dress.

  “What? You don't think I'd look good in a big pink dress with a pointy hat?” she teased.

  “Well, no worse than I would look in armor. I don't think they make pot-belly armor anyway,” said Van.

  “Probably not,” she said as she chuckled. She stared at the floor for a moment as her mood turned somber. “We're going to have to go back to the apartment for a few days. I'm going to need a little time to get used to being a topsider again. You know, I think I am going to miss this place,” she said.

  “You? For some inexplicable reason, I'm not famous topside. Do you think we can correct that?”

  “If they found out someone with perfectly good credentials came down here, you would be famous for at least ten minutes for being that crazy.”

  Van lifted his hands palm up as if weighing two things. “Adored, abhorred. Adored, abhorred. Tough choice.”

  The truth of the matter was that he did actually prefer life under ground. He had spent so many years on space ships that he was uncomfortable in the open. The open sky made him feel exposed and vulnerable. He would never tell Siln that, though. He would stick with her where ever she needed to go.

  He seldom lapsed into fantasy while underground. He believed the surroundings and wonderful people lessened the likelihood he would. He had spent some time working with the primitive food processor that Abbair's guards protected. It took a lot of assurances from Siln to convince Abbair that Van wouldn't break the thing. He managed to get some basic medicines out of the food unit. The medical functions were not enabled and even the library was stunted. Van believed it may have previously been on a big ship where medical functions were centralized. He had been able to produce aspirin and an antiseptic ointment. These two things had elevated him from revered to worshipped. He had to reassure Abbair that he had absolutely no political aspirations. All he needed were some medical chemical definitions and a chemical analysis scanner, and he could probably produce more. He felt bad about abandoning these people when he could do so much for them. Abbair had begun to forge an alliance with the Disruptors to supply them with medications free of charge. That was going over very well. That gave Abbair a large army in essence. Van believed a few more alliances like that would make Abbair a true king.

  The day of the big banquet arrived at last. Van and Siln tried to act casual, but they were both excited. Van and Siln chose matching suits. They looked the part of people leaving on a mission. Late in the afternoon they were escorted to the main hall. They were still escorted everywhere as a throng of people appeared as soon as either of them poked their heads out of the door. A tremendous cheer rose up when they entered the hall. Van and Siln took their place at the head of the table. Another cheer erupted when Abbair entered. The security patrol gently pushed the crowd back. The main table was for the very important people. Representatives of many levels were in attendance. They were dressed in the distinctly varied manners common to their own levels. New Bedlam was not the largest or the most powerful level in the Dives, but it was certainly the wealthiest. The recent alliance with the Disruptors had vastly improved the security of New Bedlam. The Disruptors occupied a level entirely devoted to the maintenance of their huge army. Their sole purpose was to engage the Forces and defeat them in battle. They were more successful than was admitted to by the topsider administration. They were absolutely the most powerful force in the Dives.

  A hush fell over the crowd when Abbair rose to speak. “Citizens of New Bedlam, honored guests, and brave Disruptors; welcome to my table,” he said in a loud, clear voice. “We join together in this place to honor two people who have brought us prosperity and health, Sir Ellen and Chamberlain During.” Thunderous applause and cheering filled the room. Once the room was quiet again he continued. “Through the efforts of these two miraculous saviors, our society has risen to historic heights.” It seemed his every sentence would now be cause for cheering. “Blessed is the day they came to us. It shall be a holiday which I now proclaim Lord Ellen day.” There was another prolonged pause for cheers. “Now let us be merry and celebrate our collective good fortune.”

  Food and drink were brought to the tables. Trays of food were circulated through the crowd. Alcohol was somewhat limited due to production capabilities but there was enough for everyone to have a cup. That was a real treat as alcohol was extremely valuable and not within reach for common people. The hall became a roar of conversation and laughing. Delegations from several levels were toasted and treated well. It seemed a new era of friendship and coop
eration was dawning and everyone credited Van for it. The time for Van's address came. It came as a surprise to Siln when he turned and asked her if she was coming or not. Van considered them a team, a single unit. Without each other, they were nothing.

  Van stood up to thunderous applause. The assembly went absolutely wild. Van and Siln stood on the dais trying not to look sheepish. It appeared the noise would not abate for some time so Van raised a hand. The crowd quickly fell silent.

  “Good people of New Bedlam, esteemed delegations, and valiant Disruptors. The honor you bestow on the two of us is humbling and received with the greatest gratitude.” It became quickly obvious to Van that his every sentence would also be greeted with a cheer. He had to raise his hands again to silence the crowd. “I come to you tonight to announce that the Chamberlain and I are to embark on a quest.” This time there was little cheering. “Even though it grieves us, we must leave you now for a matter of the utmost concern and peril to the Chamberlain.” An audible gasp rose up. Oh, jeeze, thought Van, this is going to be worse than I thought. “Even though we leave you to face great peril, I pledge to you that I shall return.” At this, the crowd was heartened and cheered enthusiastically. The shocked Siln turned to Van in disbelief. He stared straight ahead to avoid her eyes. “It may be a long time before I return. Events may overtake me. However, I promise you this: as long as I breathe I shall keep you in my heart and ever strive to return.” With that he thrust a fist into the air and the crowd exploded. Van took his seat while the crowd roared its approval. Siln turned to Van with a look of deep concern. “You will return? How are you going to do that, Van? Leave me with no credentials in the same fix I was in when I left the first time?”

  Van turned to her and said, “I love you like a sister. I will never leave you unless you are safe. I will not ask you to come back with me and I will not leave until you are holding your daughter and your credentials are secure.”

  Siln started to cry and collapsed against his chest. The crowd around them began murmuring. Van turned to them and said, “She grieves for leaving you, as do I.” That seemed to mollify them.

  Siln began to chuckle. She lifted her head to look at him and said, “You are so full of shit.”

  The rest of the evening was subdued. There were a lot of questions about where they were going and what they were going to do. Van would only tell them that it was a matter of great importance to the Chamberlain and his honor hung on a pledge he had made to her. That wasn't a very good explanation but it was all he would say. At last Van and Siln rose to leave and were followed by a cheering throng all the way to their apartment.

  The next day was somber. The crowd outside their apartment consisted mostly of people crying, but the crowd thinned to just a few later in the evening. Abbair entered their apartment on the second night. Siln and Van were taken aback. Abbair summoned people to his palace, he didn't go calling.

  “Please excuse the breach of protocol. People might think you were about to leave if I summoned you. There might be a riot. For the last two days I have had a crew tunneling through the two apartments next door to you.” Siln and Van look perplexed. “Yes, they have been very quiet so as to not raise suspicions. They will open the tunnel into this room and you shall escape unseen. A squadron of Disruptors will escort you to the surface and further if you like. The tunnel will be ready tonight. When do you want to leave?”

  “Tonight,” Siln said without any hesitation.

  Van gave her a look but decided there was no use in waiting.

  Abbair looked at Van and said, “Okay then, the tunnelers will break through as soon as possible and the Disruptors will be ready. Farewell and good luck.”

  Abbair left and disappeared into the thinning crowd. Van and Siln made ready. They didn't have much to take. There was practically nothing that would not look out of place above. Late in the night there was a faint scraping and a small hole appeared in the wall. An eye appeared and a voice said, “Ready?”

  Siln walked to the hole and said, “Yes.”

  The hole got larger quickly. When it was just big enough to crawl through, the voice said, “Lets go.”

  They went through into the next apartment. A larger hole led into the second apartment. Both apartments were furnished. Van wondered how Abbair got the people that lived in them to move. They exited the apartment to face ten grim Disrupters. They were armed to the teeth and outfitted in full battle gear. The armed group fanned out and began walking in a crouched position, heads scanning side to side. Van couldn't understand it since there was an entire squadron guarding the entrance and the town was as safe as could be. The troops insisted on stealth so they crept along quietly. When they reached the front of the New Bedlam level, the guards rushed out with guns pointing in every direction. They burst out and met a couple rising from one of the lower levels. The couple let out a horrified scream. The Disruptors quieted them and suggested they continue their journey later. The couple was very agreeable to the suggestion. Van and Siln were ushered out to the stairway with ten soldiers ahead and ten behind. Siln thought the exercise was silly and said so. An officer who personally guarded them replied that there were probably a thousand people that would die to get their hands on the two of them. Oh yeah, Siln remembered, famous. Siln became much more alert as they mounted the top level. One by one they filed out of the tin-covered exit.

  The platoon leader said, “We can take you further. That could be hazardous. We can send a single soldier. Or, we can let you go.”

  It was a tough choice. Twenty Disruptors going to the surface would not go unnoticed. On the other hand, the two of them were valuable property and could have been followed. Siln and Van decided a single escort would be best. The second in command stepped forward and said he was ready to serve. The rest of the platoon disappeared down the stairs. Van and Siln looked at each other, both feeling exposed. The disruptor said, “I will take the point.” He slowly poked his head out of the door looking both directions. He signaled them to follow as he crept out of the door. Siln told the disruptor where they were headed as they crouched in the shadows. The rest of the trip was nerve-wracking. They covered every foot as if a fire fight would break out. Van and Siln changed into their topsider clothes when they reached the warehouse. The soldier guarded them all the while. They wrapped their diver clothes in the paper they had left behind. They told the soldier they would be safe from there. The soldier said that he would follow in the shadows for a few blocks. Van decided it wouldn't hurt but warned the soldier not to place himself in danger since he and Siln had a real advantage on the top side.

  The soldier said, “Thank you, sir. You are as kind as you are storied to be. I will follow for a bit and then turn back.”

  The soldier stuck his head out of the secret exit. He waved Van and Siln forward. They ducked out through the hole and were magically transformed. Siln felt as if she was a worm that had cast off its skin to become a butterfly. She stretched to dry her silvery wings in the sun. There was no one else on Alpha One who knew what it was like to move between the two worlds. One life dark, the other light. She had almost taken wing when she stepped from the warehouse. The lightness lifted her up, carried her as if on a breeze. The world below her feet was a dreamscape of endless possibilities. Siln would not give in to her fears. They were behind her. She might face new fears, but she would never again be haunted by the past. She and Van chatted as they walked at a leisurely pace. Two perfect topsiders out for an evening stroll. A few blocks later they passed a Forces detail. Van said, “Good evening!” as if he were happy to see them. He hoped to detain them a bit with conversation but they were having none of it. He and Siln continued on as if nothing were amiss. They decided that the Disrupter following them must have turned back. They walked up to the apartment and collapsed on the couch.

  “Man, I feel worse up here than I did down there,” Van said.

  “It took me a while to get used to the top side. You'll adjust to it in a bit. I'm going to bed, are you g
oing to be okay?” Siln asked as she rose and walked to her bedroom.

  “Oh, sure,” Van said but he wasn't sure. He didn't know if anything would be okay again. He didn't think he could live a contented life up here while thousands of people suffered below. He sat staring into space until the tension of the trip faded into fatigue and then to exhaustion. He went to bed and dreamt of low tunnels and rock rooms. He woke up twice with nightmares. Each time discontent crowded his conscience a little more.

  Both Siln and Van were pensive through the following days. Van because of the inner conflict he felt about leaving the underground, Siln because of the uncertainties surrounding her planned meeting. Siln thought to call Christor, but chose instead to walk to the door and announce herself. She would watch the place for a couple of days and wait until her girl was out of the house. Christor would hopefully be alone. Siln thought she might just write if there appeared to be another woman.

  One day Van stood and faced Siln. He said, “Don't you think it's time?”

  Siln looked at him searching for some hint of the future. Then she rose to face her fears. “I guess so. Here's what I plan to do.”

  The plan was simple. Van and Siln would take turns watching the place in an effort to avoid suspicion. When they thought they had the routine down, Siln would go to the door while Van waited in a glider. They would head for the Townsend River if things got dicey. The river flowed underground to within a half a mile of the Dives. The plan was dangerous. They had no way of knowing if they could make it through the water system. They decided to throw an empty liquid container into the river and see if it came out the other end, a hazardous job in its own right. Siln wasn't sure what they would tell the Forces if they asked what was going on. They calculated how long it would take a floating object to travel the distance based on a small flow test. One morning before dawn they drove to the site and quickly tossed the container into water. They drove to the other end slowly so as to use up time. A half an hour later the container floated by. That was good enough for them.