by C. J. Miller
“I love you,” she said.
Saafir fell back a step, but didn’t release her. “You’re upset because you love me?”
How could she explain this? It was an epiphany she had only just realized herself. “I can’t have a future with you. You know it. I know it. I don’t know why we’re playacting at this, pretending like we’ll be fine when this ends.”
Saafir tried to pull her against him, but she held up her hands. If she were wrapped in his arms, her resistance would fall away and she would fool herself into thinking she could do this. Being with him felt too good and so right, but he wasn’t what she wanted. He was missing the key component that she needed to feel complete and safe enough to hand over her heart.
“We’re not playacting. If what Adham said about being my mistress upset you, I’m sorry. I thought it was an option. Not a good one, but a way we could be together.”
It wasn’t about Adham’s suggestion she become Saafir’s mistress. It wasn’t about Owen’s words, either. It was about a fundamental truth she knew about herself that she had been denying. “I can’t be with someone who will never really be with me. I can never be your number one. I need to be someone’s number one.” She wouldn’t play second to someone’s drug addiction or their wife or their job. She had to know she was important to someone.
* * *
Saafir could tell Sarah that she was the woman he wanted. He could tell her he loved her. But he couldn’t offer what she was asking of him or give her what she needed. He was obligated to marry someone else. His country was depending on him.
If he told her he loved her, would it make it harder for her to walk away?
As it had been since becoming the emir, Saafir’s personal desires played a distant second to the needs of his countrymen. He had to let Sarah go now or risk hurting her more. She was close to breaking down. He sensed a deep vulnerability and fear inside her. He wouldn’t exploit it or risk hurting her further.
“You deserve more than to be someone’s mistress. You deserve to be the center of someone’s world.”
“And that can’t be you,” Sarah said. Her voice was flat. It wasn’t a question or spoken with malice. She was as resigned to their fate as he was.
“I never should have taken you with me to my hotel room knowing I couldn’t give you more than a few nights,” Saafir said. It was as close to an apology as he could muster. He wouldn’t apologize for what they’d had as if they had been a mistake. Not when it was everything to him.
Sarah shrugged. “I started it, didn’t I? When it got complicated, I should have walked away.”
This was over. The realization shook him and left him cold. “I am not sure I can let you go,” Saafir said. He wouldn’t have been able to after one night. How would he now?
“You don’t have a choice,” she said.
He’d never had one. The moment Mikhail had stepped down as emir, Saafir’s future had been decided and his fate sealed.
One of his guards got out of the car and joined him. “Your excellency, we’ve got trouble.”
More trouble? He wanted to talk to Sarah and be certain she was okay. Looking at the devastation on her face, he knew she wasn’t. A breakup should be quick and clean. He wasn’t ready to let her go, but he knew discussing it wouldn’t change anything, no matter how much he wanted it to.
“Tell me,” Saafir said, his tone sharp and angry. The anger had everything to do with losing her and nothing to do with the woman herself.
His guard switched to Arabic. “We’ve been looking into leaks within the committee, trying to get a lead on Frederick’s location. We found paperwork in Frederick’s hotel room. He believed your lady friend was back-channeling information to America about your decisions on the trade summit.”
“You’re accusing Sarah of being a spy?” Saafir asked in Arabic.
At the mention of her name, Sarah looked at him.
Sarah wasn’t a spy. She wasn’t faking what she felt for him in order to get information. They’d found the mole on the committee, hadn’t they?
Saafir asked her plain. He wouldn’t be left wondering, even if it was wondering for a sliver of time. “I need to ask you something. Whatever you tell me, I will believe you.”
Sarah waited.
“Are you a spy for America?”
Sarah opened her mouth and closed it several times. She started to speak and faltered.
Dread crept over him.
Sarah cleared her throat. “I am not a spy. Owen asked me to tell him if I knew anything.”
“About me? About the trade agreement?” Saafir asked. Was this a misunderstanding?
“About both.”
Saafir’s heart hardened against the shock that battered him. She had betrayed him. He was worried about her and her heart and he had been blinded by the strength of his feelings for her. “You were using me to get information for the Americans. This is an act?” He stepped away from her and gestured between them.
Her mouth fell open. “No! I didn’t know anything. I never told him anything.”
“My guards tell me you and Owen met near here a short while ago. Are you involved in the kidnapping? Are you working for Wasam?”
Sarah brought her hand to her head. “What? Do you hear yourself? I am not a spy. I am not working for Wasam. Owen is my brother-in-law. That is all.”
“But you agreed to give him information about the trade agreement that you learned from me?”
She lowered her head and her shoulders fell. “Yes.”
Fury exploded inside him. One minute ago, he wouldn’t have questioned her loyalties. Now, he didn’t know what to believe. His brother had been betrayed by the woman he’d loved and now Saafir was in the same position. How had he let this happen? “I never want to see you again.”
Sarah brought her hand to her mouth and a sob escaped.
“You can drop the act. The jig is up. But if I find out you had anything to do with Frederick or Virginia’s disappearance, you will wish you had never spoken to me.”
“You’re letting her go?” his guard asked.
“What choice do I have?” Saafir asked. If this were Qamsar, he’d have authority to demand she be arrested for betraying him and Qamsar.
Sarah turned away and walked down the street. Saafir nodded at her guards to continue to follow her so she’d arrive home safely. Suddenly, she stopped and put her phone to her ear.
She turned around, her face pale beneath a street night.
“Saafir,” she said. The word lacked any guilt or remorse, only strain and heartbreak. “It’s Virginia.”
Chapter 11
Sarah had been through an emotional hurricane in the last ten minutes and her mind had to be playing tricks on her. Her apartment phone number was showing on the display and it was Virginia’s voice on the line.
Relief and confusion struck her at once. “Virginia? Are you okay? We’ve been trying to get in touch with you. Rabah Wasam—” She hurried back to Saafir and put the phone on speaker so he and his guards could hear the conversation. If she missed something important, it could cost Virginia her life.
“I hoped someone knew I was taken.” The words escaped on a moan. “He has Frederick and me. We’re in your apartment. He wants you and Saafir to come here.”
Saafir leaned closer and the scent of him threatened to destroy her. It was now a scent she would associate with heartbreak.
“Why does he want us there?” Sarah asked.
“I don’t know. Just come now. Please,” Virginia said.
“Can he hear you right now?” Sarah asked, wondering how freely Virginia could speak.
“Yes,” Virginia said. She hiccupped.
She wouldn’t press Virginia for details while Wasam was listening. “We’re on our way. We’ll call th
e police.”
“No police.” A muffled conversation and then Virginia spoke again. “He says he has followers posted in this neighborhood watching for you. If he sees a police car, he’ll shoot us both. You must come alone. If you bring the emir’s guards, he’ll kill us.”
Wasam would trap her and Saafir along with the hostages. “Hang in there, Virginia. Try to stay calm. We’re coming.” The line was silent. “Virginia?” They’d lost the connection. “She’s gone.”
“Call her back,” Saafir said. “Make sure the number wasn’t spoofed. We’re not walking into a trap if Frederick and Virginia aren’t there.”
Sarah dialed the number with shaking hands. Virginia didn’t answer. A man did. She switched the call to speaker.
“To what do I owe this pleasure?” the man asked.
Saafir mouthed Wasam’s name. A chill piped over her.
“Please let them go,” Sarah said.
“Since you asked nicely, I won’t laugh. But no,” Wasam said.
What could she say? She looked to Saafir for help. He took the phone from her. “Wasam, this doesn’t involve them. I will come alone to Sarah’s apartment. You need to let Frederick and Virginia go.”
“How delightful. The two lovers are together. I had hoped that was the case. You will come. If you’re not here in ten minutes, Frederick dies. Ten more minutes and Virginia is dead. How many more deaths do you want on your filthy hands?”
Wasam was trying to rattle them. It was working. Panic clawed at her.
Saafir appeared calm. “I will come alone.”
“You are not in a position to negotiate with me,” Wasam said. “Come now. I have an important job for you. Hurry up. Time’s running out.”
Saafir looked at the phone. “We need to go now if we’re going to make it in time.”
Fear made the neurons in her brain fire faster. A dozen thoughts raced through her mind. They had to call the authorities. This wasn’t something they could handle alone. Then again, if Wasam wasn’t bluffing and he had his followers posted in her neighborhood, he could make good on his threat and kill Virginia and Frederick. Or would he kill them anyway?
“We’ll go to your apartment. It’s not Frederick or Virginia he wants. It’s me. The guards and my driver will contact the police and they’ll find a way to help. At a minimum, we have to stall Wasam until help arrives,” Saafir said. Saafir’s driver stepped out of the car and joined the other men on the sidewalk. Saafir barked additional instructions at them in Arabic.
Sarah climbed into the passenger seat.
Before he pulled away from the curb, he looked at her. “If this is a trick and you are leading me into a trap—”
“It isn’t,” Sarah said. How could Saafir think so badly of her? She had agreed to help Owen under duress. It wasn’t an excuse, but if she could go back in time, she would be more firm with Owen and tell him no from the start. She would hold her ground and not let guilt or obligation or her need for the job play a role in her decision.
“I know you don’t trust me now, but I never asked you about the trade agreement,” Sarah said.
“You agreed to betray me,” he said. Ice frosted his words.
She wouldn’t harp on the subject. Wasam was demanding they walk into a dangerous situation with no information except his word that he had Virginia and Frederick. He could have followers with guns with him. Virginia and Frederick could need medical attention.
“My guards will handle this delicately. They’ll call Adham. Wasam is smart. If he says he planted people in your neighborhood, believe it. Have you ever held a gun?” Saafir asked.
“No,” Sarah said.
“There’s a gun underneath the seat. Get it,” Saafir said.
She drew out a cool metal box. Saafir gave her the combination to open the lock. Her hands were trembling and she needed three tries to get it right. When she opened the lid, a gun stared back at her. She lifted it, feeling awkward and unsure. “It’s heavy.”
“Don’t point it at anyone unless you are willing to kill them.” He pointed to a spot on the gun. “This is the safety. If you feel threatened, take it off. If you have to protect yourself, shoot to kill. Pull the trigger and don’t stop until you know you are safe.”
Though she had broken his trust, he was arming her. “Thank you for looking out for me.”
“I gave you my word and my word is my bond,” Saafir said.
A lesser man would have brought her along and not cared about her well-being.
“You know my history with Wasam. He is an unstable man, but he is persistent. He will see this through until someone is dead. You don’t have to come with me. I can talk him into taking me and letting Frederick and Virginia go.”
“I won’t let you go in alone,” Sarah said. If Wasam saw they hadn’t followed his instructions, would he lose it and shoot everyone?
“How does he plan to get out of this alive?” Sarah asked.
“I don’t know, but he’s a master of deceptions and trickery. He’s not planning to die tonight,” Saafir said.
Seven minutes later, they pulled in front of Sarah’s townhouse. Wasam was in her home holding hostages and that knowledge filled her with terror and a sense of violation.
Wasam didn’t play by any rules. He felt justified in hurting or killing to get what he wanted. She and Saafir would need to be careful not to make it worse by triggering an outburst from Wasam.
Saafir pointed to the gun. “Aim and shoot if you get the opportunity or you need to protect yourself. Don’t get scared and shoot. The likelihood of you hitting a target at any distance is slim, and bullets flying mean someone will get hurt.”
Saafir was wearing a gun under his suit jacket. He moved it to the back of his pants. “Once we are inside, I need you to get behind something, like your kitchen cabinets or your couch, anything that could shield you. Nothing is completely bulletproof, but it might help. Once Wasam pulls a gun, you can be sure he plans to kill all four of us.”
Sarah grabbed Saafir’s forearm. “He could be planning to do that anyway.”
Saafir looked at her hand and emotion smoldered in his eyes. Anger?
“He wants power. He needs me to hand that power over to him. He’ll kill me as a last resort, but not until he’s gotten me to admit that he’s the rightful leader of Qamsar. Just as I have to unite the three political parties to be powerful, so does he.”
If Saafir was angry, he was controlling it well. “Sarah, I know that you are afraid. You can do this. I saw you handle Khoury. You were brave. Find that courage again. I will be with you and I will back you up no matter what happens.”
She and Saafir parked and took the stairs to her apartment. The door was unlocked and Sarah pushed it open. Saafir stepped in front of her.
“Come in, come in. So nice of you to join us,” Wasam said. His accent was heavier than Saafir’s, but he was speaking English.
Sarah’s legs shook and her knees felt boneless. She was greeted with the smell of gasoline and the sight of Frederick and Virginia tied to chairs in the middle of the room. They were back-to-back and their mouths were taped. Adrenaline shot hard through her and she felt like her body had suddenly turned stiff.
Virginia shook her head at Sarah. A warning? Her eyes were red-rimmed, as if she had been crying. Frederick was slumped forward, his eyes closed. Was he dead?
Rabah Wasam pointed his gun at Saafir. The other two men with Wasam aimed their guns at the hostages and at Sarah. “This can go my way or this can end with seven deaths in this room.”
“We’re here,” Saafir said. “You asked us to come and we did. As a show of good faith, at least let the women go. They aren’t involved in this.”
Wasam shook his head. “Nope. I have a use for everyone.”
Sarah’s eyes watered, the heavy scent
of gasoline burning them.
Wasam smiled. “Do you like how I decorated your place? That pleasing fragrance is gasoline. I thought it was poetic justice. You want our oil and now I’ll use it for my purposes. I doused everything in it. If anyone fires a gun, including the great emir who never misses, the entire room will ignite and send this place straight to hell.”
Sarah watched Saafir. He was circling the room slowly. Wasam tracked him with his gun. “Careful, Saafir. I haven’t forgotten the time we spent training together. The great, amazing Saafir, prince of the kingdom, could do no wrong. I know your moves. Don’t try to unbalance me.”
“Let them go and then we can talk,” Saafir said. His voice was low and even.
Wasam let out a yap of sharp laughter. “You think it will be that easy? I have demands that need to be met first.”
Saafir tensed. Sarah tried to read the situation. She sensed a delicate interplay between Wasam and Saafir, each sizing up the other. Though Wasam had more firepower and two followers who were likely trained in using their guns, Saafir didn’t appear ready to surrender. He was advocating for the release of the hostages. He wanted to get everyone to safety.
“You all deserve to die,” Wasam said. He pointed to Virginia and Frederick. “She works for the bloodthirsty company who wants to rule Qamsar and he is your little errand boy. I’d be doing Qamsar a favor by getting rid of them. We don’t need people working against us, pretending they want to help and plotting the demise of our country.”
“No one in this room is working against Qamsar,” Saafir said.
Sarah disagreed on that point. Everything Wasam was doing was destructive and wouldn’t end well for anyone.
* * *
Rabah Wasam had not always been an extremist who dealt in threats and murder. He had once been a good friend, a man Saafir had admired. He’d been a good soldier who trained hard and had been dedicated to serving his country.
The time he had spent in prison had broken him. A darkness had taken over his thoughts. Whether it was bitterness or revenge, Wasam was bent on seeing someone pay for what had happened to him. Knowing Wasam many years before and knowing what had happened to him gave Saafir leverage over his psyche, but not enough for Saafir to be sure of the best direction to steer the conversation. Wasam could be unpredictable.
