Powerless: In a world of superpowers, what happens when you have none?

by Niall McCreanor

  He would often say to her, “It's not about the speed in which it takes us to get to the destination; it's about the journey...” When Jennifer heard this she knew that his intentions were true and she just needed to be patient with him.

  Often she would find herself saying, “I have the feeling you’re holding something back and I’m not sure what it is or why.” But both of them understood that a relationship was about compromise, finding a balance and a comfort zone in which both of them were happy. But while Lee could see in Jennifer’s eyes that she was completely open to him, laying all her trust in him, he was well aware that she probably could not see the same in him. They both knew that he was holding something back and while his feelings for her were strong and pure, how was she to know that the one thing he kept from her was not related to them as a couple.

  As he never disclosed his underlying ability to Jennifer she never disclosed hers to him. At times she would playfully tease him that he wouldn’t tell her, saying, “I know everything there is to know except this one thing.” But it was often delivered with a laugh as she could see Lee would grow visibly uncomfortable. But she also seemed shy of the topic, referring to mistakes in her past when her shrouded ability got the better of her, but never revealing what exactly it was.

  Lee knew that he would only have to push her slightly to find out what her power was, as she was always so willing to open up to him and move their relationship forward by sharing everything. However, he would never ask her, because he was not yet ready to share his secret with her yet. With them both keeping their own secrets, somehow it kept them on an even footing; something that Lee felt much more comfortable with at the moment.

  CHAPTER NINE

  Lee’s relationship with Jennifer grew closer and he fondly considered her to be his best friend, naturally sharing a part of himself with her that he simply didn’t share with his brother. When Jennifer began to have difficulty with renewing the lease on her apartment, rather than her searching for a new place to live Lee decided it was about time he showed he was willing to commit to her. Trying to think outside the box, he came up with a way to ask her to move in that she wouldn’t expect.

  “Hey, you need some help looking for a new place? There are plenty of other flats you could rent instead of this one. It’s more hassle than it is worth.” Lee said as he walked up behind her while she washed the dishes, encircling her with his arms and pulling her body close to his. He nuzzled into her, breathing in the intoxicating smell of freshly washed hair.

  Her hands paused in the sink as she considered what he was saying. She was desperate for him to ask her to move in, but the decision needed to be his and she didn’t want to pressure him into it. From the sounds of things, her moving in wasn’t exactly at the forefront of Lee’s mind.

  “Erm, yeah that’s not a bad idea actually. Some place new might be quite refreshing. I’m sick of this area anyway.” In her head she thought about how much she longed to be in Lee’s neighbourhood; quiet and slightly rural yet close enough to the city to be suitable for her job. It would just be perfect, in every way. Waking up next to him every single morning was all she wanted.

  “Well I walked past an estate agent the other day actually.”

  Jennifer’s eyebrows shot up at this unexpected comment.

  “And I went in to ask about a few places. I could take you now for some viewings if you wanted?” He leant his back against the kitchen counter opposite the sink, allowing her room to react and turn around.

  “What? Oh. Yeah that would be good. Right now?”

  Seeing Jennifer so unsure and yet still open to the situation warmed Lee’s heart. This is going to make her day, he thought.

  “Yeah, why not! We can make a day of it.”

  She did not look convinced, but always happy to humour Lee, she agreed and went to grab her coat and bag.

  Lee drove, trying his best to hide the broad smile that kept threatening to spread across his face. First he drove her to an area on the outskirts of the city, renowned for its high levels of crime and poor living conditions. The look on her face was a picture and Lee could tell he was pushing her patience to the limit.

  “Lee, what is going on?! You don’t really expect me to live here do you? Anywhere would be better than here!”

  “Well, yes it might have a bad reputation, but you get so much more for your money here. You can get a 3-bed apartment here for the price of a studio further out of town. You could even rent out the 2 other bedrooms for a bit of extra cash.” Lee said, biting his lip to stop himself from laughing.

  “No. Just… no. What is next?”

  Lee feigned a frustrated sigh and continued driving away from the city. He spoke about other options, each as ridiculous as the last, pushing Jennifer to the limit.

  “Well there is one last place we could go to, if you’re sure none of these others are suitable?” he said, staring straight ahead of him, knowing that one look and she would guess what he was up to.

  “Sure. Let’s just get it over with and go for some lunch. This is exhausting!” Jennifer was so disappointed. The day had gone from bad to worse and she was beginning to feel genuinely concerned that Lee was trying to get rid of her. She just didn’t know where all this had come from. She thought they were stronger than ever.

  As she looked out of the window of the car she noticed that they were driving into a familiar area. Lee pulled into his own drive and turned to face her.

  “What about this place? I hear the rent is really low and the landlord is pretty good looking,” he said with a cheeky wink.

  Her brows furrowed as she looked from the house to Lee and back again. She so desperately wanted to believe that this meant what she hoped it meant, but something stopped her from saying it out loud.

  “Jennifer. Will you move in with me?” the cheeky twinkle in his eye was quickly replaced with one of the most genuine smiles she had ever seen.

  “Oh Lee! You really fooled me with all this driving around! You drive me mad! Of course I’ll move in with you!” She bent across the front of the car and into his arms, her insides filling with excitement at this next step.

  Although initially Lee had been unsure as to whether they were ready for a move like this, as they had only been together for less than year, after thinking it through thoroughly, he could see no real reason against it. Ultimately this was the person that he wanted to spend all his time with. The only thing holding him back was the secret of his power, but that was a matter for another time. Together they walked into the house, Jennifer now seeing it with new eyes and almost running into the kitchen to make them both some lunch.

  Lee instinctively reached for his phone to tell his brother the news. Tom would no doubt be shocked at this new development and he couldn’t wait for his response. But the phone rang out, with no response from Tom.

  What was once a rare occurrence was now becoming regular. Before, Tom would always answer Lee’s calls, unless he was on duty, but lately Lee could never get hold of him and when he did it was never for long. The pair saw each other less and less and it played on his mind and today it really began to worry him. All he wanted was to share this happy news with the three most important people in his entire life.

  *

  During holidays Lee would normally return home accompanied by Tom to spend time with their father, going every so often to the cabin that their father brought them to as kids to teach them all their hunting and tracking skills. Lee had even begun to bring Jennifer with him, now that they lived together. Philip always kept a watchful eye over the relationship he had with Jennifer, wanting to keep his son protected and safe. He would read her body language towards him, often when they sat in the car as they arrived in his house for a visit he would watch from inside the house, being sure to remain unseen. Normally the two only ever showed affection. But one time he stood and watched them pull in. They were arguing and Lee seemed upset with what he was hearing. Philip feared Lee was being asked about his powers and was
about to go out to cause a distraction for his son. He made his way to the front door and slowly opened it. By the time he opened the door wide enough to peep out he could see Jennifer throwing her arms around Lee and comforting him. Lees face changed and all that could be seen on his face was a look of contentment. Seeing this, Philip closed the door still unseen by the young couple in the car and disappeared back into the house.

  He decided that rather than keeping an eye on Jennifer he would in fact try to get to know her a little better. Philip called Lee aside asking if he could go the market and pick up some things, telling him he was going to teach Jennifer how to fish. The prospect of Philip teaching her this was amusing to him.

  “ Good luck with that, I can’t see her baiting a hook!” Philip laughed as he knew when Lee was a boy this was an arduous task that took Philip hours to teach him.

  “If I could teach you, I can teach Jennifer.”

  Lee left Philip to do as he planned.

  Jennifer sat in the cabin turning the pages of an old battered book with the spine broken and didn’t hear Philip walking in. Peering across the top of the book she was greeted by him holding 2 fishing rods. Bemused as to what he wanted and thinking, He couldn’t possibly want to go fishing with me, I can’t even fish, Philip declared, “Come on, we have a job to do.”

  Jennifer was mystified by this. “What job?”

  “We are going to catch dinner!” Philip countered.

  Jennifer simply rose the palm of her hand to her forehead head. Rubbing it slightly, she could only muster the words, “Oh god.” But never being shy of a challenge she got up and left with Philip.

  Ambling down to the waterfront, Philip carried most of the gear and Jennifer simply carried her rod in hand. When they got there Philip took the rod from Jennifer’s hand and slowly showed her how to tie the best knot in the line. Then undoing the same knot and handing her back the rod, he told her, “You can’t learn by looking, you learn by doing!”

  To his happy amusement, Jennifer retied the knot exactly as he had shown her. “Well I’ll be…” proclaimed Philip, “It took Lee a long time to master that knot. Tn fact it took me a long time and all. You just did that in your first attempt!”

  Jennifer felt a sense of achievement with this and allowed Philip to bait the hook. Not wanting to turn her against the prospect of fishing he did this for her without asking her to handle maggots. She watched as he then baited his own hook and moved closer towards the water. Philip showed her how the mechanics on the rod worked and cast his lure into the water. Propping his rod on a small stand, keeping his line elevated, he turned to once again show Jennifer how to cast her line.

  As he turned he was met with the whizzing noise of her line being fired from her reel, both surprised and impressed at her progress, he sat on the bank and watched his own line.

  Jennifer sat beside him and the two began something neither of them had done before; they had a conversation just the two of them, without Lee or Tom around.

  Mostly sticking to the topic of Lee, Philip was curious to see how much she knew about him and if possible about his secret.

  The two danced around the topic and spoke only in pleasantries until Jennifer said something that struck a reaction from Philip that neither had expected.

  “Sometimes I get the feeling Lee thinks he doesn’t belong here.”

  “He doesn’t,” Philip answered.

  Jennifer sat there kind of shocked by what Philip had said and asked, “How can you say that about your son?”

  Watching him take a deep breath he exhaled for what seemed a very long time; he owed her an explanation to what had just slipped out. Composing his thoughts he explained himself.

  “Lee doesn’t know this, but he had a sister.” Jennifer’s eyes opened wide as this revelation hit. “The reason he doesn’t know is very simple, you know the circumstances in which he was born. He lost his mother on the same day which affects him to this day. It has to! But before Joesphine had Lee she was expecting a little girl. Tom was too young to remember. She miscarried midway through her pregnancy. If she’d have gone full term then Lee would not have been born. She would have still been pregnant when he was convinced.”

  Jennifer, uncomfortable hearing this, as Lee didn’t even know, was unsure how to process it. Philip could see this. “Imagine how he would feel.”

  Jennifer asked, “Why are you telling me this?“

  “I don’t really know, but I am not asking you to keep secrets. You can tell him if you want. I wanted to so many times, but chose not to.”

  “Why haven’t you?” Jennifer asked.

  “Simple. Just because something has to be said, doesn’t mean it has to be heard. He has gone through enough without me adding to it. He will feel like he doesn’t belong and I feel that despite the world trying to keep him out, he found a way. And he always will. I am not sure about life after death, but I know his life more than anyone else’s, even my own, will count.”

  Jennifer processed the trust he had just placed in her. “I have my own feelings on life after death…” She paused to gauge his interest and seeing it was there she went on. “My father died when I was young and in part I felt responsible.” Hiding the fact she felt soley responsibly she went on. “It was and is the hardest thing I have ever had to come to terms with and for a long time I struggled. But one day I was in school and we were learning about far away planets and one little fact helped in ways no one can imagine. Kepler 22b is a planet that scientists think can sustain life. An interesting fact, but not the one I am talking about. If you or I were on Kepler 22b right now and we looked back at earth we would see dinosaurs! This is that fact that has comforted me.”

  Philip didn’t understand to correlation between the fact and Jennifer’s comfort and had to ask, “Why?”

  “Simply put, if there is a point in the universe where I can go and look back and see dinosaurs then surely there is an infinite amount of points where I can go and see my father being born, going for his first day to school, meeting my mother, teaching me how to ride a bike and, sadly, an infinite amount of points where I can go and watch him die. It comforts me to know that these places exist, and there is no denial of this. It is a solid fact. But one more fact remains, sadly I will never be able to go there.”

  This incredibly deep and profound thought hit Philip deeper than anything had in such a long time. Struggling to put into words how he felt he let the thought flow through him.

  Eventually gearing up to say something, he was cut short by the float on the end of Jennifer’s line disappearing under the water. Jumping up excitedly and grabbing her rod she shrieked at Philip. “What do I do?” Talking her through exactly what she was to do, Philip helped her land her first fish and that night’s dinner.

  Lee returned to the cabin to find it still empty, as he stepped back onto the porch he was greeted by Philip carrying all the equipment and by Jennifer with dinner in hand.

  “Oh my god, you actually caught something. It took me ages to ever catch anything!”

  Jennifer ran up placed her lips on his and said, “I hope you are good at cleaning fish.” All three laughed as Lee took the fish inside to prepare. Jennifer stopped before entering the cabin and turned to Philip. She didn’t have to speak, but each offered the other a subtle nod and that was all they had to say. They knew that the other would keep the conversation private as they didn’t want to affect Lee’s happiness.

  CHAPTER TEN

  A few weeks after the trip to the cabin Jennifer had to stay late at work to do a stock take in the coffee shop. Lee decided to surprise her with a nice romantic meal, spending hours working in the kitchen on what he hoped to be something special for the two of them. Jennifer was always the one looking after him, so he was looking forward to the opportunity to do something nice for her.

  Time passed and Jennifer was late. Aware she should be back but feeling no sense of panic he continued to prep the food in the kitchen. He heard the front door open, which was n
ot unusual, but the slam that followed it was. Walking into the sitting room expecting to see Jennifer coming his way, he was only met by her disappearing shadow as she went straight into the bedroom. Following her in, he asked, “Are you ok? Did something happen?”

  Looking back at Lee through tear-filled eyes, all Jennifer could muster was, “They took it,” and she broke down crying. Lee rushed over and threw his hands around her. “Who took what?”

  Choked up and emotional Jennifer needed to compose herself to answer Lee. “I was mugged, and they took my locket. It’s the only thing I have left from him.”

  Lee both saddened and angered asked once more, “Your father’s locket?”

  Jennifer whimpered, “Yes.” and broke down again.

  Panicked, Lee pleaded, “Did they hurt you?”

  “Not physically,” she answered.

  “Did they take your phone?” Jennifer was unable to answer. “Please Jennifer, did they take your phone?”

  Confused Jennifer answered, “Yes, but I don’t care about that.”

  Lee stood up, walked over to his laptop and opened it, his fingers furiously tapped at the keyboard and his eyes were transfixed on the screen.

  Jumping up and proclaiming, “I got the bastards!” He grabbed his coat and disappeared out the door. Jennifer didn’t understand what Lee was doing and felt hurt that he left her when she needed him the most. She would never have done this to him. Not moving from their bed Jennifer was emotionally drained and just lay there for hours, falling in and out of sleep.

  Night time set in and Lee was nowhere to be seen when the house phone rang. Unable to regain her strength she let it ring out. The ringing only stopped long enough for the person on the other end to punch in the number again. Once more Jennifer did not answer. The phone rang a third time, heartbroken and drained Jennifer pulled herself up from under the sheets and picked up the phone. When she answered she was met by a solid questioning voice, “Is this Jennifer Patzner?