Moment of Truth

by Emrys Apollo

  “Not too much,” Desmond begged as Antony’s first finger began circling his ring of muscle. “I want to feel you when I’m sat in my meeting.” Desmond choked out as Antony pushed his finger inside him to the first knuckle. The idea of Desmond sitting in his interview, thinking about him like this caused an unintentional groan to rip out of Antony. “Holy fuck…” Desmond moaned, and arm reaching round to spread his cheeks apart to give Antony better access. “More.” Placing his hand on top of Desmond, Antony continued pushing his finger into Desmond until it had completely disappeared.

  “So tight.” Antony gasped, his body already straining against an orgasm. “Will not last long.” He apologized. Desmond was shaking his head.

  “Neither…” He panted, his head hanging towards the bed, sweat droplets running down the back of his knees. Antony licked from the inside of Desmond’s knee to his ass as he pushed his second finger in to the sweet sounds of Desmond’s deep moans. “Fuck… I need… Now…” Desmond’s voice was broken. Antony tried to be as gentle as possible as he pulled his fingers from Desmond. He gave a few extra thrusts to try and stretch him open a little more but neither of them looked like they were going to last very much longer. He reached for the condom packet by Desmond’s hand beat him to it.

  Sliding the condom over Antony’s length, Desmond gave him a few extra tugs with his hand, having Antony swaying a little at the pleasure. The other man lay out on his back, widening his legs for Antony to position himself between. They shared a brief moment of eye contact before Antony lined himself up, pushing in slowly. The tightness of Desmond was almost enough to push Antony over the edge. He was gripping tight enough to leave nail marks on Desmond’s thigh but he didn’t care. His mind had blanked out everything that wasn’t Desmond’s panted moans or the tight hot heat he was pushing into.

  They managed to last a little longer than they had both expected, but it wasn’t very long at all until Antony was moaning Desmond’s name as he shot his load, his hand fisting rapidly at Desmond’s flushed cock. Desmond came soon after, leaving stains on both Antony and Desmond’s chest as the man collapsed down onto the man he was inside. Desmond’s arms came around him, in that same protective manner, and began playing through his hair softly. It was soothing, relaxing. Antony was confident he could fall asleep right here.

  “My leg has gone dead.” Desmond muttered gently in Antony’s ear, kissing just below it softly. With a sigh and a wince, Antony pulled out of Desmond, letting the man roll out from underneath him. “Oh God…”

  “What?” Antony asked, keeping his eyes closed, his body too fatigued to want or care to move.

  “Can you just stay like that until I come back?” Antony let a smug smile cross onto his face. “You look like a sexy, spent, fuck toy.”

  “I’m your fuck toy?” Antony asked airily, cracking an eye open a little. Desmond was standing over him, eyes raking in every inch. It made Antony’s insides squirm. He loved the way Desmond was looking at him.

  “Considering I haven’t fucked you yet…” Desmond licked his lips, crawling over Antony and grazing his teeth against his hip. Desmond was just about to lick up the mess on his stomach when twinkly music chimed from beside them. “Shit.”

  “You have to go?” Antony said, his voice more genuinely sad that he wished to admit. Desmond ran a hand through his hair.

  “I need to jump in the shower.” Desmond said, pressing a soft kiss to Antony’s lips before he dashed towards the bathroom. Antony allowed the feeling to seep into his body for a little while longer before he got to his feet and retrieved the dressing gown from the wardrobe. He too could really use a shower but he would deal with that when Desmond had gone.

  Desmond came out towel drying his hair with his jeans already on. A small pout fell on his lips when he saw Antony wasn’t on the bed any more. Sadly, Antony held out his shirt. Desmond took it without a word, pulling it over his head.

  “Hope your meeting goes well…” Antony sighed. He wasn’t focusing on how genuinely sad he was that Desmond was going. Right now, why ever he was feeling that, it was making his performance much more believable which was always a good thing. Desmond stepped back into Antony’s personal space, pulling at the tie of the dressing gown until it fell open. He shamelessly looked over Antony’s body.

  “I’m coming back.” Desmond stated, tying Antony’s dressing gown back up. Antony frowned.

  “Hey?”

  “Fuck my flight. I’m not just going to fuck you and leave you. Not you.” Antony’s heart fluttered as the kind, sensitive Desmond resurfaced, tracing his thumb across his cheek. “I don’t want to leave.”

  “It’s your job.” Antony said, his voice breathy again. Desmond nuzzled his nose.

  “I’ll be as quick as I can.” Desmond promised. “Order some room service, have a shower, do what you want, charge everything to my card.” Desmond said, pulling his wallet out and handing Antony a card. “I’ll give you a call when I’m on my way back and I’ll come get you and… I’m going to take you somewhere else. We’ll have just two days of us, yeah? Or not, whatever you want-”

  “Sounds perfect.” Antony smiled, saying it before he’d realized the words were in the air. It made him happy to see Desmond look genuinely happy. Desmond pulled him close for a sweet kiss, basically dragging himself away from Antony to make himself leave.

  “I’ll be as quick as I can.” Desmond promised once again before forcing himself out of the door. Antony remained standing in the middle of the room, Desmond’s card in one hand whilst the other traced his lips for the last remises of Desmond’s touch. The mirror in the room caught his eye and he turned to see himself in it. The smile fell off his face as the card fluttered to the floor: he looked like he was in love.

  Boy, was he in trouble now.

  - - -

  Four days later…

  “How was the weekend?” Michelle said. His tone was stiff. Antony didn’t like it, he wasn’t used to receiving the cold shoulder from Michelle. But he knew this situation was coming. Clearly Michelle had been watching the hotel room.

  “Was okay.” Antony shrugged, trying to seem nonchalant. Michelle scoffed at him.

  “Just okay?”

  “Was it supposed to be something else?”

  “Just thought a full weekend uninterrupted with the man you love would be a little better than okay.” Michelle snapped, slamming the pile of case reports on the desk. Antony blushed a deep red.

  “Michelle-”

  “Do not.” Michelle said sharply, holding his hand up to Antony. He deflated as the pair of them locked eyes. He dropped his head, looking back at sorting the reports he had just sorted. “You are not that good of an actor. I know you, Antony.”

  “I did not mean for this to happen.” Antony said sincerely, taking a step towards Michelle. Michelle stood tall with his back to Antony, clutching the pile of reports to his chest.

  “Just hope this does not compromise the mission.” Michelle said in a corporate tone. It felt like a punch in the chest to Antony.

  “Michelle-” He tried again as the Italian walked passed him, getting a hand on his shoulder to stop him walking. Michelle shrugged him off.

  “It’s Stella to you, agent.” Michelle bit, not even looking at Antony as he walked out of the room and away from him. Six months. It was just supposed to be six months but already it was falling apart in his hands.

  - - -

  “Let me get this straight.” Desmond said, sitting with his back against the wall near the door. Jody and Stuart had also slid to the floor, Stuart’s head resting lightly on Jody’s shoulder. “You’re tasked to kill me, but within meeting me and drugging me for an evening you fall in love with me, and then chose to jeopardize your entire career for people you know will kill you before they let you leave to be with me?”

  “Don’t forget the part about constantly lying to your face and leaking our mission data to those people who would kill him if they knew he’d ‘fallen in love’.” Jody
added in a dark tone. Desmond nodded at him.

  “Right.”

  “Honestly, maybe this is why you never detected him. He’s shit at his job.”

  “Does seem that way.”

  “Have killed so many people in the same way.” Antony muttered bitterly.

  “Sure you have.” Antony’s head snapped to Desmond.

  “You not wonder how I knew who you were? Who to target? Who we assumed would be the easiest to pick off?”

  “Careful now, you’re really not in a position to be digging the needle in.” Desmond warned.

  “How good are you at your job to not realize you’ve been in love with an agent of the opposition for seven year?”

  “If I’d have been tasked to kill you I can guarantee you wouldn't currently be sitting here.” Desmond threatened. Antony matched his look.

  “Could you?”

  “The better question is why didn’t Argent kill you?” Stuart piped up. All three men looked across at him, causing a light blush to hit Stuart’s cheeks. He sat up. “If they knew you loved Desmond and wouldn’t kill him, why didn’t they put a bullet in your head and go kill Desmond anyway?”

  “That is a very good question.” Desmond said, turning back to Antony. Antony let out a sigh; they really were going to go through everything.

  - - - - - -

  Six months after the first meeting…

  “Mission report, Abascal.” Lorenzo said, checking the meeting minutes and not looking up as Antony got to his feet. Antony took a deep breath, looking straight at the men ahead of him and not those around him.

  “Sir, I am asking for an extension on the Sharp case.” Antony said with all the confidence he could muster. He heard a scoff from beside him and was sure it came from Michelle. But that didn’t matter. Antony needed more time; he couldn’t kill Desmond, his sweet, kind, caring Desmond who had opened up his whole life for Antony. He needed more time to find a way around this mission without having it end in Desmond’s death.

  Lorenzo pulled the glasses off his nose, looking up at Antony.

  “Extension?”

  “Yes, Sir.” Antony nodded.

  “You have had six months. How much more time do you need?” Danic asked, looking bemused. Antony closed his eyes.

  “Two years.” The room went in uproar, only silenced by Lorenzo smacking the gavel against the desk.

  “You want a two year extension on his life.” Lorenzo said, his question sounding much more like a statement. Antony simply nodded; his voice lost in the intense stare Lorenzo was holding him in. “And what would justify such a merciful act?”

  “It’s so much more to get from him.” Antony rushed. He had to drop his eyes when Lorenzo kept staring; it felt like the older Italian was trying to read him.

  “Is there? I think we have a substantial amount of information on the Storming program. I’m not sure what else the mission could offer.”

  “I can get insight, live insight. We can know their moves before they make them. We can block everything they try. Will be like a fly on the wall. Can relay anything you want on them. Can get it from him.”

  “The target is to be removed before your discovery.” Lorenzo reminded firmly. Antony swallowed.

  “Will not be discovered.” He said as confidently as he could.

  “The idea was to remove their agents, not allow them the potential to intercept one of our key agents.”

  “He is a key window to all their activity.” Antony pressed. “You see what I get in six months, imagine what I can get in two years. We can topple them from the inside. Rather than just knowing our enemy we can completely destroy them.” Lorenzo was still studying him carefully. Antony wasn’t sure if he had managed to conceal the real reason he was fighting so hard for Desmond’s life, but he was hoping he had. If they knew he loved Desmond he would be a compromised agent. They certainly wouldn’t let him live if that were the case and then someone else would be sent in to kill sweet, gentle Desmond.

  Lorenzo thought long and hard about the decision, making Antony’s palms sweat. He closed his fists, hoping to hide his nerves from those around him.

  “Fine. Two-year extension granted. I want weekly updates and I want you moving in with him within the next twelve months. Will have much better access if you surround yourself with the target.”

  “Thank you, Sir.” Antony nodded, exhaling a huge breath of relief as he sat back down. Antony fought hard to keep the smile off his face. He had saved Desmond’s life. Now he just had to find a way to keep him alive past that point.

  - - - - -

  Three and a half years after the first meeting…

  “You called, Sir?” Antony asked as he was let into Lorenzo’s office. Lorenzo didn’t acknowledge he was there, just carried on with the paperwork he was writing out.

  “You were supposed to kill the target a year ago.” Lorenzo said calmly.

  “Desmond…” Antony muttered under his breath. Antony wasn’t sure but Lorenzo may have heard him, as he took that moment to stop writing abruptly and pull his glasses off his face.

  “Why is he not dead?” Lorenzo exasperated. Antony rang his hands together.

  “It’s not as easy as-”

  “Try again.” Lorenzo cut across with a bored tone. Antony frowned at him. “I’m sure it was a well rehearsed speech but I would prefer the truth.” Antony swallowed dryly as Lorenzo got to his feet. “Why is the target still alive?”

  “Trying to make it look like an accident-” Antony dropped his head as he spoke quickly.

  “I want the truth!” Lorenzo roared, causing Antony to flinch. “You have killed so many in the past. Make them all look like accidents very easily. Why is this scum agent so much harder?”

  “He is not scum!” Antony hollered back, his patience with everyone referring to his Desmond as dirt coming to an end. However, losing his patience with the head of his team may have not been the best idea. Lorenzo folded his arms, his face cold as stone.

  “So is true. You have fallen in love with this opposition and now will not kill him.” Lorenzo stated. Antony dropped his head. “You are a compromised agent.”

  “No!” Antony begged, tears pouring down his face. “I’m not! I’m not compromised! I still bring you everything! I still tell you all they are doing! I give you all the information on Storming! I’m still your agent!”

  “But you love him. And you cannot kill him. A direct order and you are disobeying it.”

  “Please, please, he does nothing! Please do not make me kill him!”

  “I will send another-”

  “No!” Antony screamed; leaping across the desk and knocking Lorenzo away from the phone he was reaching for. The man was panting hard with tears falling down his face but he securely had Lorenzo pinned to the floor. “Will not let you kill him.”

  “Then you are a compromised agent-”

  “No. I work for you. I betray his trust for you. I hurt him every day for you. I am not compromised.” Antony gritted, his hold on Lorenzo’s collar tight. There was a moment of silence where the two men just looked at each other, panting for breath. Antony swallowed his tears, letting go of Lorenzo’s collar. “Let me get him for you.”

  “Do not want his kind here.”

  “He’s amazing at his job-”

  “How dare you sing the praises of another agent here! How dare you speak well of those scum!” Lorenzo raged, shoving Antony off him. “If you cannot kill him someone else will.” He stated, reaching for the phone. Antony pulled the phone off the desk, smashing it against the wall. Lorenzo only saw red as he pinned Antony against the wall. “You are now working in direct opposition to this company’s goals. Tell me why I should not kill you right now.” Lorenzo snarled, pulling his gun from his holster and pressing it against Antony’s temple.

  “There is something big…. Happening now…” Antony said fearfully, his eyes locked on the cold metal pressed against his head.

  “Something big you were hiding from us?�
� Lorenzo glared, pushing the gun closer to Antony. Antony shook his head.

  “Check… Bag…” Antony gasped as Lorenzo shoved him to the floor. The gun never came off Antony as Lorenzo crossed the room and tipped Antony’s backpack onto the desk. He collected up the mission file stamped ‘TOP SECRET’

  “What is this?” Lorenzo asked; flicking through it with the gun still trained on Antony. Antony stayed on the floor.

  “I’m not sure of the specifics… But looks like they are homing in on Leone…”

  “Indeed…”

  “Let me… Let me feed you information on this… We can keep Leone hidden… We can know what they are planning and stop it… Please… He is my link to this information… Is… Is not love…” Antony told his shoes. Luckily, Lorenzo was too engrossed in the file to be looking over at him and see the lie. “Let us stop this… Then I kill him.”

  “If you do not,” Lorenzo said, flicking the safety on the gun and putting it away as he collected up the file. “Someone else will.” Antony let out a deep breath as Lorenzo walked out of the office to copy the file. He still had time. He still had time to find a way to save Desmond and him from the lives they had ended up living.

  - - -

  “I don’t know, Antony, sounds like you had a pretty good deal there. Just keep stealing from the guy you supposedly loved, consistently put his life in danger by leaking his plans and next moves to the opposition, and they won’t make you kill him.” Jody glared.

  “How did you fuck it up?” Desmond said, more softly. Antony frowned at him.

  “What?”

  “Jody’s right; that’s a mega deal. You’ve got nothing to lose. So what caused them to change their mind?” Antony held Desmond’s look for a long while before he dropped his head.

  “You surprised me.”

  “Come again?” Desmond frowned.

  “You surprised me with a holiday for our anniversary. Two weeks; us, the sand, no distractions.” Desmond remembered it well; he’d scored some overdue holiday with Henson and managed to get two whole weeks of not being on call, not being needed. It was just them and their remote location bathed in sun. It had been bliss.