Dangerous Kisses

by Trish Milburn

  The image sent a shudder through Sydney. She bit her bottom lip to keep it from trembling. She didn’t want to die, but how long would she have to put her life on hold, wondering if her every move was being watched by someone whose mind had twisted into something grotesque? Tears threatened but she blinked them into submission. She almost lost the battle against them when Jake cupped her cheek with his strong hand.

  "We’ll get him," he said.

  "What am I supposed to do until then? You don’t know what this story meant to me."

  He dropped his hand and moved away. "It’s just a story, just a job."

  "Like protecting people is just a job?" She heard the hurt lacing her question but was at the point of not caring.

  "That’s different."

  "Why?"

  "Because we save lives."

  "And all journalists do is get in your way, right? We’re just a bunch of nosy good-for-nothings whose whole purpose in life is to be the bane of your existence."

  "I didn’t say that."

  "You didn’t have to." She turned and stalked toward the stairs. She had her answer without even asking the question. If he detested what she did for a living, how could he ever feel any fondness for her as a person?

  She was near the top of the stairs before his hand wrapped around her arm, halting her retreat. "Wait." His voice came softer and more pleading than she’d expected.

  "Why should I?"

  From his spot two steps below her, he stared into her eyes. The depths of his seemed to harbor a storm, a fierce battle between forces she could not name.

  "Because I don’t think you’re those awful things."

  "You don’t like reporters, Jake. I could tell that the first day we met."

  "I have reasons."

  "What reasons?"

  He released her and closed his eyes for a moment. "It’s not important."

  "It is to me."

  "Why?"

  She took a deep breath and tried to control the jitters, making it difficult to stand still this close to him. "I care what you think."

  One of the forces warring within his gaze won over the other. He moved closer to her and framed her face with his hands. His mouth descended toward hers, her heart drummed against her ribs, and her hands slid up his chest. She lost herself in his kiss — so warm, so intoxicating, so surprisingly gentle.

  Even though she didn’t want to, she pushed away. "No. Quit trying to avoid answering me."

  Almost as surprising as the power of the kiss was the sudden move he made past her to the deck of the boat. Damn it, he was impossible to figure out. Did he want her or not?

  By the time she recovered enough to follow him, he was releasing the boat from the dock.

  "What are you doing?"

  "I thought we’d go for a ride."

  She glanced toward the parking lot where the Metro officer sat watching them slowly drift away from the marina. Though Jake had made the decision without consulting her, for once she didn’t object. Maybe if they spent more time alone, she could figure out a few more things about this man who sheltered his thoughts and feelings. What was the reason behind his dislike of reporters? Did he feel anything for her other than physical attraction?Give it time, give him time, she told herself as they drifted farther and farther into the open water. Maybe if she didn’t push, he’d finally open up.

  They remained silent until Jake anchored off one of the bigger islands in the middle of the lake. She glanced over at him, wondering about his plans.

  "Thought we’d roast a few hot dogs," he said. "Don’t know about you, but I’m hungry."

  She helped him stuff the hot dogs, buns, ketchup, chips and Mountain Dews into a plastic grocery bag, then followed him to the edge of the boat. When he descended into the gently lapping waves, he reached up for her.

  "I can get down," she said, afraid she’d topple him into the lake.

  "I’m a strong guy, Sydney. I won’t drop you."

  So she climbed over the side of the craft and dropped into his arms. He’d told the truth. His strong arms wrapped around her as he carried her toward dry sand. Her feet didn’t even get damp.

  "Your feet are going to freeze," she said.

  "They’ll dry by the fire."

  Within a few minutes, he’d gathered downed limbs and driftwood and started a roaring fire. As he sharpened the end of two more limbs to roast their hot dogs, she watched him, enchanted by the alluring picture he made in the orange glow of the fire. She let the world beyond the firelight fade away. There would be plenty of time for worrying later.

  "Have you done this before?" she asked.

  "Roasted hot dogs?"

  "Come out to this island."

  "A few times, when I want to get away from the noise of the marina. Some people equate having a boat with getting stupid-faced drunk and partying all night."

  "You could always arrest them."

  He chuckled. "That’s a great way to make friends with your neighbors. Plus, they haven’t pushed anyone overboard yet."

  She scooted closer to the fire as the night chill at her back deepened. "This is probably a good place to camp."

  "Do you like to camp?"

  "I used to. We’d go every summer when I was little, before Mom died. There wasn’t much time after that. Dad worked a lot."

  "To make up for your mother’s income?"

  "Partially, but I think he worked to try to forget. I think he feared stopping long enough to feel."

  The words made her realize she’d been doing the same thing all her life, going ninety miles an hour so no one could catch her and hurt her.

  Maybe it was time to slow down, no matter how much it scared her.

  They remained silent as they roasted, then ate their hot dogs.

  She wiped ketchup from the edge of her mouth. "Mmm, I’d forgotten how good hot dogs over a fire could be."

  Jake smiled at her, chuckled a bit, stealing her breath. If he smiled like that all the time, he’d have been grabbed and married long ago.

  "You should smile more often, Detective Radley. It makes you look human."

  "Thanks, I think."

  They both stared into the fire as it popped and sent sparks sailing toward the sky. For the first time in she couldn’t remember how long, a kind of peace settled over her.

  "I didn’t talk to your boss to get you kicked off your story." Jake’s sudden comment brought a bit of the outside world back into their midst and dashed the peaceful mood. He hesitated for a moment, as if he dreaded saying anything more, wished he hadn’t brought up the topic. "I had a message when I got back to the office. From him."

  She didn’t need to ask who "him" was, and it wasn’t Bill. A lump rose in her throat, making it difficult to swallow. Her stomach threatened to reject the meal she’d so enjoyed.

  "What...what did he say?"

  "He was there, Sydney. He was somewhere nearby while we were looking for him."

  She inhaled sharply. How did this maniac keep getting close enough to watch her? Her skin crawled, and a cold chill raced down her spine. She glanced out into the inky darkness beyond the light of the fire. Could he somehow be out there, in a boat of his own, watching her even now? The possibility made her nauseated and furious all at once.

  She stood and walked to the water’s edge. Even the gentle lapping did nothing to soothe her. "Have you checked out all my neighbors? I’ve never been uncomfortable around any of them, but no one suspected Ted Bundy either."

  "We talked to them once, but we’re going back through again."

  She shuddered at the thought of one of her neighbors being a cold-blooded killer. "What if we set a trap?"

  "What do you mean?" He asked it slowly, suspicion ripe.

  "I go somewhere alone, out of the way, only I’m not. You all are set up ahead of me."

  "No. It’s too dangerous. Too many things could go wrong."

  There was no use arguing with him. And the truth was the scared-to-death part of her was glad
he’d nixed the idea. Still, she’d do it if it meant an end to the strain of constantly being guarded and flinching at every noise. If it would stop this predator from killing innocent young women.

  "I’m so tired of this. I just want it to be over."

  Jake came to stand behind her. He stroked her hair, trying to soothe her.

  "Why did he call you?" she asked as she continued staring into the unknown.

  "Maybe he gets a thrill out of eluding the cops and wants to rub my face in it."

  "You’re not telling me everything, are you?"

  For a few moments, he said nothing, then "Oh, hell." He paused, then sighed. "Seems he doesn’t like the personal aspect of our relationship. He said something about guys like me and girls like you."

  Sydney turned to face Jake. "What did he mean by that?"

  "He’s fixated on you. I think it’s partly because you fit the physical description he’s looking for, but you’ve been elusive and protected, so now he’s angry in addition to being attracted." His eyes stared at her, dark and serious. "That’s why we are taking all the extra precautions. I’m afraid if he caught you, it’d be worse than the others. He might take his anger out on you even more than he did with Stephanie and Maggie."

  Cold slices of fear scraped down her back like claws. When she shuddered, Jake pulled her to him and rubbed up and down her spine as if to chase away those chills.

  "What makes people like this?" she whispered, her throat thick with fatigue and disturbing thoughts of torture and death.

  "Something’s not right in their heads. It can’t be."

  They stood together for several long, silent seconds before she spoke again. "I feel like he’s out there now, watching me."

  Jake kissed her forehead. "He won’t get to you. I swear it."

  "Your father would be proud of you." When Jake’s back stiffened, she moved away enough to look into his face. "I’m sorry if talking about him hurts you, but I wanted you to know that I think you’re a good police officer."

  He glanced away, stared into the night. "That means a lot to me," he said, then looked back at her. "And surprises me considering you were pretty ticked at me when I got home tonight."

  "My friend Becky says I’m too hard on you, but she doesn’t know what it’s like for me. No one does."

  "What?"

  She slipped out of his embrace and walked toward the fire, rubbing her arms for warmth. The chill came not from the night air but the past. "I can’t stand being powerless. It doesn’t matter if it’s a minor or major aspect of my life, I have to be in control. The morning I found out my mother died, I changed. For a long time, I was afraid of the dark. I couldn’t go to sleep unless my father was sitting beside me, and I had nightmares every night." She shook her head, remembering those horrible months. "The poor man. For a year or more, he never got a full night’s sleep. I’d wake up screaming for Mom, and Dad would hold me until I cried myself back to sleep."

  Jake stepped up behind her and wrapped his arms around her shoulders. She closed her eyes and soaked in the power and tenderness those arms possessed, allowing herself to want to relive the comfort every day.

  "As I got older, I eventually slept through the night but I was determined to never be vulnerable. I’m the world’s worst passenger in a car. I hated group projects in school. I’m a card-carrying control freak." She tried to laugh, but it came out more a shaky whimper. She bit down on her quivering lower lip. "Because my mother had no control over how she died."

  "None of us do."

  "No, but we’re able to make decisions about how we live. My mother didn’t have that chance."

  Tears overflowed and trailed down her cheeks. Jake turned her in his arms and wiped away her tears.

  "That’s why Bill made me so angry today. More and more control has been taken out of my hands since that chocolate showed up on my desk. This story, one I’m a part of, was just the last straw. I know everyone is just trying to protect me, but I felt like my life was spinning out of control when the last thing I was in charge of was taken away. Can you understand that?"

  "Yes, but you’ll never be able to control everything. You don’t have to control this. I’m here with you."

  She ran a hand over his face, one she could get used to seeing when she woke up in the morning and went to sleep at night. That hint of dependence should have scared her, but it didn’t. Instead, it intrigued her, tempted her, and when his lips took hers, she kissed him back, this time in a kiss a bit more demanding than the others. Deeper, longer, hotter.

  Without a word, he led her back toward the boat. Her heart beat in her ears, buzzing like hummingbird wings as he led her down the steps into the cabin. When they reached the side of the bed, however, Jake froze.

  "What’s wrong?" He tried to retreat, but she gripped his hand more firmly. "Oh, no you don’t," she said. "This baring of souls is a two-way street, mister. Tell me what’s wrong. I won’t go berserk if you tell me you’re not interested, although it’s strange to go around kissing people you’re not interested in."

  "I’m interested." He stared at her with a hot, hungry look in his eyes. "That’s the problem."

  She forced herself to meet his gaze, to not look away. "Because I’m still a reporter?"

  "No."

  "Then what’s the problem? We’re both adults. I don’t expect a proposal on bended knee in the morning."

  "You deserve more than I can give."

  "And what exactly are you offering, Detective Radley?"

  "This." He took her face in his hands and kissed her like a man getting his first taste of a woman after being locked away for years.

  His hands skimmed over her, promising unthinkable pleasure. Her head spun from the intensity of the yearning it generated in her center.

  When he lifted his mouth from hers, he gulped in air and closed his eyes. "That’s it, Sydney. That’s all I can give you."

  "I’ll take it," she whispered.

  He stared at her for several seconds, those warring factions clashing deep in his eyes. Then he kissed her again, a kiss laced with desire, relief and expectation. Caught up in the feel of his mouth possessing hers, it took her a minute to realize he was unbuttoning her blouse. Her heart thudded like a wren’s caught in a cat’s maw. But this was one predator to whom she was more than willing to submit.

  His warm hands slid beneath the cool cotton of her blouse and cupped her breasts. She sighed in pleasure at his simple touch. She should have known she needed this kind of closeness with another human being, with Jake.

  She slid her hands up his chest and fumbled with the buttons on his shirt. It was difficult to think or function properly with him kissing her like that — like he wanted to absorb her. With her mind reeling and her hands exploring, Sydney thrilled each time Jake peeled away another layer of her clothing. When she stood naked, Jake lifted her against him and placed her in the bed. She watched with wide eyes as he discarded the rest of his clothes.

  Her breath caught. If a man could be beautiful, Jake Radley was. Strong muscles stretched across his chest and stomach. Lean hips promised strength. Her mouth went dry as her gaze wandered lower. Long legs supported the rest of his powerful body.

  "You’re staring," he said.

  She looked up to see a crooked smile on his face. She wanted to utter a sassy comeback, but her true feelings tumbled out. "You’re wonderful to look at."

  His smile faded, replaced by a hunger that matched her own. He slid under the covers and pulled her against him. She closed her eyes and moaned. Oh, the feel of him. So much power harnessed in those muscles. She glided her fingers over every one, aching to examine everything Jake had to give.

  Jake’s hands stroked her stomach, kneaded her breasts and skimmed her thighs until her mind shut down and she glided along on a wave of pure sensation. When he positioned himself above her and gripped her hips in his hands, her eyes popped open.

  "Are you okay?" Concern clouded his desire-drugged eyes.

 
How could she tell him that at this moment she’d never wanted anything, anyone, as much as she wanted him? How could she utter those words without scaring him away and possibly losing the last of herself?

  "I’m fine."

  He surprised her by rolling onto his back, taking her with him. She sat atop him, a little self-conscious. She tried to cover herself, but he clasped her wrists in his hands and guided them to her sides.

  "Don’t. You’re beautiful, Sydney. Don’t cover up that beauty."

  Tears popped into her eyes. Oh, God, she was falling in love with him, more with each passing minute. She wanted to tell him, but she clamped down on the words before they ruined the moment. He’d told her all he could give her was his body, and she’d gladly taken it. She wasn’t going to throw unwanted emotions into the mix. It might be wrong, but she wanted to know what it felt like to have Jake inside her, holding her closer than she’d ever been held before. She’d deal with her emotions when she was alone.

  Jake skimmed her breasts, then lifted himself to kiss them. She weaved her fingers through his short hair and leaned her head back, basking in the feel of his mouth on her breasts. The wet, warm feel of him made her muscles tighten and yearn for more. Denied the ability to tell him she loved him, she took his face in her hands and kissed him with as much power and intensity as she felt in her heart.

  She left him gasping when they pulled apart. Their faces only a couple of inches away from each other, he stared straight into her eyes. "I want you, Sydney, more than I’ve ever wanted a woman."

  It wasn’t a confession of love eternal, but she grabbed his words and held them to her heart. He dropped back onto the bed, his hands cradling her hips.

  "You’re in control," he said.

  Those damn tears threatened again. He knew what she needed, and he gave it to her freely. He wouldn’t be sorry.

  With a lift of her hips, they joined. She held her breath and closed her eyes as her body accommodated his length. A slight movement from him plucked a vibrating chord within her, and she began to move, bringing him with her. He stayed beneath her, giving but allowing her the command of the situation she so desperately needed. Something inside of her softened at his generosity. It allowed her to roll onto her back, giving the power back to him.