Awakening, 2nd edition

by Kuili, Ray N.

  “What does it have to do with scale?” Brandon began to boil up slowly. “I ’m not a dictator. I ’m a manager. I manage people. I don ’t order to them to shoot at each other. Okay? My job is to manage, to lead. Not to conquer lands and sit on a throne.”

  “They, too, led and managed. They just happened to have more people.”

  “So what? Who cares how many people they had? We ’re comparing apples and I don ’t know what . . . footballs here. Why are you bringing this up? A manager can be a tyrant, but not the other way around. Why are we talking about them at all? They were in different business es . Different busine ss es !”

  Stella smiled.

  “So are we. Not sure about you, but I, for instance, work in Big Pharma. Anyone else around here in the drugs business?”

  “Well, if you put it th at way . . .” Alan grinned.

  “Seriously. No? See, we all are in different businesses. Yet somehow we ’re all in the same room learning the same things.”

  “So far we haven ’t learned much, ” Paul muttered bitterly. “But keep talking, guys. It ’s entertaining. Ed ’s notepad is already half full.”

  Everyone turned towards Ed, who immediately gave them a wide smile and began gesticulating franticly, as if trying to convey the message , “I ’m not here, I ’m invisible, pay no attention to me, don’t speak to me . . .”

  “Fine,” Alan said decisively. “Let ’s go with this then.”

  He turned to the flipchart, and a new line appeared on the paper: “A leader always provokes strong feelings.”

  “For example, strong disgust, ” Stella commented merrily. “Do you have a problem with the word fear ?”

  “I don’t have any problem, ” Alan shrugged off her comment, “b ut this definition is generic enough to accommodate anything.”

  “Hey, we don ’t need just anything , remember?” reminded Chris. “We need details . We need specifics. Generic doesn ’t cut it.”

  Alan didn’t seem hurt by the fact th at his definition had been dismissed so casually.

  “Fine. Can you make it more specific?”

  “Absolutely. How about this: A leader is always respected, feared or loved.”

  “Much better, ” Stella said. “We ’re getting somewhere.”

  “Let’s be more radical, ” Alan proposed. “A leader always progresses from being loved to being respected , and then to being feared.”

  He thought for a moment.

  “And then to being resented, ignored and , ultimately, fired.”

  Despite several chuckles in the room, Chris wasn’t in the mood for a joke.

  “Let’s try to stay serious, shall we?”

  “Let’s try to have lunch, shall we?” Paul offered. “So far , instead of fear and respect , all I ’ve developed are strong pangs of hunger.”

  They had to wait for lunch, though , as it turned out it wasn ’t supposed to be served for another half hour. But they used this time well, and another two lines appeared on the flipchart. These were curious, unexpected lines, which at first glance didn ’t seem to have anything in common with the word manager . Nor did they have anything in common with it at the second glance. And the longer they argued , and threw words back and forth, and looked for definitions, the clearer the ghosts of the past materialized before their eyes—the shadows of rulers and raging waves of people following them. And the rulers emerged from these waves, starting at the very sea level , growing up, maturing, slowly gathering immense power and finally turning into the menacing monuments to remain in history forever. Born to lower -class families, deprived at birth of any power, seeking it, desiring it, longing for it, craving for it more than anything . . .

  And Brandon no longer talked about his profession. Instead, he strode back and forth across the room and stroked his mustache , listening to the others. Names of dictators and kings, presidents and generals were flying in all directions.

  “Now that was a leader!” Chris said , cl e nching his fist. “A n obody, out of nowhere ; a street rat—and made the entire nation follow him! And if he didn ’t have bold goals , then I don ’t know who did.”

  “His own goals, mind you, ” Alan add ed, with a brief glance at Joan.

  “Precisely—his own, ” Chris agree d .

  As for Michael, he just leaned back in his chair and contributed occasional brief remarks, while studying speakers with his slightly ironic dark eyes.

  They changed the subject for lunch. Following Chris ’s proposal at the dining table , they talked about anything but the w orkshop. “Otherwise, ” Chris said, “we ’ll burn out quickly.” No one objected and the menacing shadows slowly faded back to the past and finally vanished. Only Brandon was less talkative than usual and kept silent most of the time. The o thers chatted about anything and everythi ng.

  They talked about Thai cuisine. Robert turned out to be a real expert on the subject and astonished everyone with his story of how he had been served meat in a little village somewhere near the border with Laos. “No way!” Joan doubted loudly. But Robert tilted his head in such a way that at once it became obvious: yes , it had happened this way, and it had happened this way to Robert and no one else.

  They talked about cocktails and dog breeds. The latter happened to be Alex ’s area of expertise and for some time he and Kevin compar ed the characteristics of the German Shepherd and the St. Bernard. Then it became apparent that , despite Kevin ’s passionate support of Alex ’s arguments in favor of the German Shepherd , he did not have and never had had a dog. As a result of this discovery, the argument wou n d down rapidly.

  They talked about movies and agreed that nothing worthy had come out this year yet , and that some actors should be seriously considering retir ement . “Some producers , too, ” added Alan. “And some actresses!” blurted out cheerful Ross, but Joan immediately explained to him how deeply inappropriate his thoughtless comment was, and he took it back with a suspiciously wordy apology.

  They touched lightly on the upcoming elections, but at the first sign of different political views , Chris interrupted the potentially dangerous discussion and suggested they pick another subject. Everyone agreed. Instead of politics , they went on to discuss the recent tax cut, and there were no disagreement s of any sorts.

  With taxes and crème brûlée, the lunch came to an end .

  “Back to writing?” Ross asked enthusiastically once they had all returned to their seats in the boardroom .

  “That we can do, ” answered Robert. “Now, remind me again, when are we going to start picking our fearless leader?”

  The question brought a flabbergasted expression to Ross ’s happy round face.

  “Isn’t that what we ’ve been doing all this time?” he asked.

  “All this time , we ’ve been writing, ” Robert answered politely. “Started at 9:00 a.m., still at it now.”

  “Yeah,” Ross mumbled, losing his enthusiasm quickly. “Guess you ’re right.”

  “Michael,” called Joan. “You started it off , didn ’t you? So tell us what ’s next.”

  Ross livened up.

  “Right! How does this help to define the process , Michael ?”

  Michael looked at him with interest, as if Ross had just proposed he sing a song.

  “The process?” he asked . “You must ’ve gotten it all wrong. I didn ’t try to define the process. You did. Chris did, Alan did. As for me, I thought it ’d be interesting to talk about the qualities of a leader. Can ’t say that I expected us to spend half the day on it, but it ’s been rather educational.”

  “Half the day , ” Chris said , “being the point here; w e ’ve only got four days. Let ’s wrap this up.”

  “No problem, ” Michael agreed. “We ’ve covered it well enough.”

  “I thought it was a good discussion, ” noted Kevin.

  “No argument about that, ” Chris replied. “But it ’s time we get down to business.”

  “You mean back to the process discussion?” clari
fied Joan.

  Chris nodded.

  “Back to the process.”

  He suddenly rose—sturdy, confident, with a proud, striking face.

  “Whether we like it or not, without a process we ’re going to lose. All of us. Literally ; there will be no winner. They, ” he pointed back to the far corner, his eyes still on the group’s faces, “are counting precisely on this happening . Trust me ; they ’ve calculated it well in advance. They thought we would just beat around the bush and would never dare to call a spade a spade. But we ’re better than this. We know we need a process. And we need it by tonight.”

  He looked around the room demandingly.

  “This is our first real decision. Unless we define the process today , we can all pack our stuff and go home this very second. I hope everyone understands this. Until we have a process , we ’re stuck, no matter how things look. So . . . do we all agree that our top priority is defining the set of rules we ’re going to use to pick a leader? Looks like it. Alex . . . did you have something to say?”

  “Nope, you’re good.”

  “Fine. Do we all agree that we must define this set of rules today ? Seems like we do. Concerns ? Objections? No? Then from now on , we concentrate on this topic only until we have our process defined. Now, who has a specific proposal on what this set should include?”

  At first, the flow of proposals was anything but impressive. There was Alan ’s proposal to have everyone describe how he would lead an imaginary company. The proposal was met with a loud “Hmm ,” a supporting nod from Michael, and Chris ’s “That ’s good . That ’s good . . .”

  There was Joan’s proposal to share some stories about tough decisions they ’d had to make in the past. There was Kevin ’s proposal to describe what everyone had learned during the last year. There was the somewhat controversial remark from Robert, who said that what they were going to discuss during these four days was completely irrelevant and the only thing that mattered was the voting process. This comment didn ’t draw much support; however , the word voting quickly became the key word, and five minutes later proposals began to flow in.

  However, about an hour later, it became apparent that all of them were proposing more or less the same idea. The domin ant theme was to have everyone go through one or more tasks then pick the winner using a simple voting process. “Remember, no self-voting! This is critical!” Kevin kept insisting. Nobody argued with him on this, though it wasn ’t clear what made him emphasize this point so passionately. The plot was thickening.

  There was an alternative, though, proposed by Ross.

  “What if we drop common tasks altogether?” he asked. “We leave the voting part and let people choose themselves what to focus on. All you need to do is to stand up and say , ‘If you elect me I ’m going to do this and that.’ It ’ll be just like real elections.”

  “No kidding, ” Brandon grumbled. “Just like real elections.” Ross ’s face became so puzzled that Brandon elaborated , “Some people promise what they ’ll do if elected, while others vote for them.”

  “And?” Ross asked, still confused.

  “And both sides know there won ’t be a damn thing done once the elections are over.”

  This remark put the discussion about an alternative way to an untimely end.

  “All right,” Chris concluded finally with satisfaction. “We ’re done with the big picture. Now let ’s get down to the dirty details. Tasks, my friends. We need a list of tasks. Alan, if you don ’t mind, would you please take care of writing them down? I ’d do it myself, but your writing is so much better than mine.”

  And once again Alan stood by the flipchart, although this time he hesitated even longer before getting up. And once again proposals and recommendations flew in.

  Chris paced the room with wide strides , catching every word, clarifying, articulating, arguing, convincing. He talked to everyone at once and to each one personally ; he didn ’t let people sit silent, he slashed the air with his wide palm, leading and shaping the conversation in every possible aspect. He was obviously in his element and even Alan gradually lost his somewhat visible frustration and shone as Chris shouted out , “Perfect! Pe-errfect!”

  But another two hours later, when the firmly written words covered a couple of sheets, everyone ’s excitement began to subside. The tasks written on the flipchart weren ’t bad. In fact they were good , and combined together represented a very solid way to evaluate a manager. The problem lay somewhere else.

  Robert put it laconically, answering, “Time,” in response to Ross ’s half-rhetorical question , “So is anything missing here?”

  Time. They had a catastrophic shortage of it. More precisely, they didn ’t have it at all.

  It would’ve taken at least two days for someone to complete all the tasks on the list. Applying some very simple math , it was easy to convert this number of days into a completely unmanageable twenty-two . All attempts to identify one or two main tasks led to miserable results that satisfied no one. Despite all the efforts, the stubborn twenty-two showed no intention of turning into four. (“Forget four! It ’s three, only three!” Joan argued fiercely .) Once the situation had been fully understood, whatever remained of the initial enthusiasm evaporated completely. They were locked in a trap, which had been waiting for them patiently from the very beginning. It was a very miserable and depressing place in which to be , and its stale air had the most devastating effect on the mood. Occasional proposals emerged every so often , only to be discussed lethargically and to end up being written in the same lethargic manner on the flipchart, but the momentum had been lost completely. Even Chris had lost some of his spirit and kept playing the part he assigned to himself rather on autopilot.

  “This is hopeless, ” Stella sighed finally. “It ’s a dead end.”

  “And your alternative is ?” asked Chris, his voice sounding a bit hostile.

  Stella lifted her arms.

  “I don’t have one. I only know we need something else.”

  “That’s a no-brainer, ” Brandon said with disappointment.

  With this statement, he had hit the poor nail on the head. A heavy silence shrouded them for a few long moments.

  And then Michael spoke. Not loudly, but not quietly either —without Chris ’s forcefulness, and yet firmly and confidently.

  . . . Let’s keep it simple. We ’ve had the solution in front of us for a while, but it has been too simple, too obvious for us to pay any attention to it (this statement definitely turned everyone ’s attention if not to the miraculous solution, the n at least to Michael). Every single one of us can easily describe how he or she would manage an imaginary company. And , by the way , this is not a bad idea. It just doesn ’t help us achieve our goal of choosing a leader. Same goes for the idea of conducting an imaginary job interview. Or coming up with a stressful situation that would test our abilities to keep composure and make right decisions under the pressure. I have to say , though, Alan, that I ’m not sure that all of us would be very good at this, so it was definitely a worthy proposal.

  But let’s recall what we ’ve been tasked with. We need to pick a leader . It ’s not about one ’s theoretical behavior in some imaginary situation. Nor is it about one ’s imagination or acting talent. I think you ’d agree that conducting an impressive imaginary job interview in front of ten people requires certain skills that may not be as critical for a leader’s everyday work. We ’re choosing a leader based on the kind of person we see here, in this room. Based on what this person has learned from his past, based on who he—or she—is today , and based on whom he or she wants to become tomorrow. Based on this person ’s past, present and future.

  We have three days. Let’s dedicate them to these three components. Tomorrow we’ll spend the day looking at the past ; e veryone will have a chance to tell others how he or she grew to be the person we see here today. Let ’s all share why we decided to become managers, what attracted us to this profession, where we began, what mistak
es we made . By the way, Joan, I really liked your proposal—we ’ve all made our share of stupid mistakes, and whoever denies it is probably still making them frequently to this day. Let ’s talk about the lessons we ’ve learned from making these mistakes, and how we ’ve been applying this knowledge. And by tomorrow evening , all people in this room will have present ed their past—only what they want to present and the way they want to present it . . .

  Michael spoke calmly, but not monotonously, moving his eyes from one face to another, sometimes smiling, sometimes growing completely serious. As if he knew that nobody would try to interrupt him, to stop him. And they were listening: Brandon , nodding in agreement ; Kevin pondering over something ; Alex sitting with an impenetrable face ; Stella squinting and swinging her leg ; Chris splitting for some reason his attention between Michael, Robert and Brandon . And from the far corner , Clark was attentively observing the monologue.

  As for Michael, he spoke and whatever everyone thought during his speech, nobody was making the slightest attempt to interrupt him.

  . . . We’ll spend Thursday talking about the present. About our jobs (no details, of course) and about ourselves as managers. About the challenges we face and the ways we deal—or fail to deal—with them. About the things we like and the things we despise. About our worries and happy moments, our victories and failures. About the things that make those who work for us—or those we work for—like or hate us. About everything that in one way or another makes up our everyday lives.

  And, finally, Friday will be the day we look at the future. On that day , we ’ll be talking about our aspirations, assuming of course that we all aspire to something higher. What we want to achieve. Why. When. How. Where. What steps we plan to take tomorrow. And what steps we took yesterday. What can slow us down. What can help us. The w here, why and how of our professional lives.

  Three days of short—thirty- to forty -minute—speeches. To some degree, confessions. Or skillful self-promotions; it all depends on how you look at it. Just like Brandon proposed, we will determine the order of speeches by a simple draw. You can listen. You can take notes. You can ask questions . Just wait till the end, since everyone should have an opportunity to say everything he or she wants to say. We ’re going for a mix of the hard boundaries and complete freedom of speech.