by Leaona Luxx
“What happened?”
“He’s not here. Our bedroom, he fuckin’ tore it to hell. Nothing survived.” I tremble, knowing that’s not Chord. He’s the sweetest.
“Shit.” He sigh. “Where is he?”
“I don’t know.” I blow out a breath. “It doesn’t look like he’s been here in days.” I walk over to the fireplace, there’s broken glass. “He killed a bottle of Jack.”
“Killed it?” he asks.
“Yeah, considering there’s no stain on the floor, I’d say it was empty before it hit the side of the brick.” Damn. I’ve messed up.
“You gonna try to find him?”
“Yeah, I’ll try to call him.” I bite my lip, looking around.
“What if he doesn’t answer?”
“I’ll go find him.” I wince. “Except, I have no cab fare.” I scratch my head.
“Call first and then go from there.” He’s right. No sense in panicking, yet.
I swallow hard. “Let me go, I need to get my man.”
“Good luck. Call me if you need me.”
“Will do.” I end the call. “First, let’s clean up while I work on gettin’ my nerve up.”
I work on the house. It’s a mess and the demolition zone that is now our bedroom needs more than what I could do on my own. I carry as much as I can down to the garage, putting it in a pile.
I take a deep breath and make the dreaded call. It rings before going to an automated message, ‘this number is not receiving calls’. What in the hell does that mean? I text him, but it bounces back. “Is his phone not working?”
The fire I thought was dead ignites with a new found kindling. “We’re not doing this, babe.”
I grab my purse and the keys by the door. Shutting it behind me as I stare at the machine in front of me. “Here’s the thing. I need to find him, and you’re gonna help. Be good to me. I might break you, but it can’t be any worse than what I’ve done to him.”
I hit the key fob, opening the door to the new Land Rover Chord bought for me. I start it up, biting my lip as I back out of the garage. I ease it to the edge of the driveway. “Yeah, I know. I don’t have a license but they don’t know that, so help me out here. I need to find my man.”
I creep onto the road and drive carefully to the end of the street. Coming to a stop, I bite my lip again as the traffic on Highway Seventeen flies by me.
“What in the hell am I doing?” I wince as I inch out between the cars. “And I’m out. Let’s do this.” I’m so proud of myself. I giggle thinking of Chord helping Silas get his license. He has taken such good care of us.
Turning my signal light on a little too early, I get shot the bird as I pull off. “Yeah, whatever. I made it,” I exclaim. I park at the back of the lot, trying to scope out Chord’s SUV. It isn’t here.
I take a deep breath before grabbing the door. “You’ve done harder things than this, go in and find him. He needs you, and you can’t live without him.” I step through the door to find the place empty.
I walk back to Chord’s office, the lights are off. Flipping them on, I see Silas’ fridge by the couch. He still has toys everywhere, and my heart races. Chord loves him so much. “How could I leave you?”
“That’s what we’ve all been wondering?” I jump as Thayer’s voice startles me.
“Shit, you scared me.” I hold my heart as I spin around.
She folds her arms. “What do you want, Sarah?”
“Chord.” I bite my lip, holding my hands up before she says another word. “Listen, I know I fucked up, but I love him and I will make it right.”
“If that’s how you show love, I’m not sure he needs it.” Her jaw clenches.
“I said I fucked up. I know I’ve hurt him, but I’ll be damned if you’re gonna stop me from loving him.” I fist my hands as I shake. Thayer and I have never argued, but I draw the line with Chord.
“Maybe he’s better off without you.” She steps toward me.
“The hell he is, he loves me.”
“Not anymore,” she seethes, lashing out at me. It cuts me deep and may be the worst I’ve ever been dealt.
I blanche, holding my tears at bay. “He doesn’t?” I stumble back, finding my balance against his desk. “I’ve lost him?”
“Thayer, chill the hell out.” Lea steps between us.
“She’s not going to hurt him anymore.” She points at me.
“Chord’s a big boy, he can decide on his own.” She turns back to me. “Sarah, sit down.”
“I’m sorry, I know y’all love him and want to protect him, but I never meant it. I hate myself for hurting him.” I find the seat behind me, slowly sitting.
Thayer shakes her head. “Well, that’s a start.”
Lea sits beside me, cocking her brow at Thayer. “Chord’s pretty rough, Sarah. It’s been a hard few months for you both.”
I turn to her, my face wet. “I know, I do. Everything happened so fast, and I didn’t mean anything I said.”
“He didn’t either, but the damage is done. I’m not sure it can be fixed this time, sweetie.” Lea lays her hand over mine.
My eyes flash to hers. “Please, don’t say that. I can’t make it without him.”
“You may have to, if he refuses to try to work things out.” I clutch my chest, and my heart hammers at my ribs.
I rub my lips together as sweat pools on my forehead. “Would he do that to me? I mean, I know he’s hurt, but it’s me.”
“I don’t think he would’ve ever thought you would do that to him either.” Lea scrunches her nose. My stomach knots.
Thayer steps in, flopping down into a chair. “Listen, he’s scared. He lost everything in a matter of weeks. He didn’t know whether you were coming back or not.”
“It was an argument, a horrible fight, but I never said I didn’t love him.” My forehead wrinkles as my pulse accelerates.
“Did you say you did? Did ya leave a note? Or maybe, you could’ve called in the almost two weeks you’ve been gone,” Thayer spits at me.
I scoot to the end of my seat, looking Thayer in the eyes. “I’m sorry I hurt you when I left the first time. No matter the circumstance, I hate I hurt you. But by god, don’t act as if I don’t love your brother. He has been my one constant, but I lost sight of that. There’s nothing I wouldn’t give to fix it. I was broken and in turn, I’ve hurt the love of my life.”
“I’m sure Thayer can understand the power of snap decisions.” Lea glares at her.
She sits back in her seat. “He was shattered the first time, do you know that? Have you ever asked any of us, what it did to our family when we lost you?”
“No, I haven’t because Chord wanted to move forward. Pick up where we left off. But looking back, I know we should’ve spent a little more time talking about how it affected us to be apart.”
“Love, grief, and time...those three bitches are beautiful and hateful, we run the world creatures.” Lea smirks.
“You got that right.” I sigh. “Y’all, I get it. The things we said during our argument should’ve never been an issue, except for one.”
“Which one was that?” Thayer cocks her brow.
“The fact he never told me he needs me and, once in a while, I could tell him how much I need him.” I wipe my eyes.
“Shit.” Thayer sits up. “So what’s your plan, sister?”
Lea and I snap our heads around. “You called me sister.” I grin,
“Shut the hell up, don’t let it go to your head.” She smirks.
“Thayer, as soon as I get my man back and locked up. You, Lea, and I are gonna have a long talk over a big glass of wine.” I wrap her hands in mine.
“Wine? Hell, we’re Southern girls, break out the Jack and I’ll bring the Coke.” Lea laughs.
“I would but my future husband cracked the Jack.” We all laugh. “Oh, our bedroom is demolished. We need an entire new bed and a lamp. A chair, mirror, and maybe a light fixture.”
“Malone said it was bad, da
mn.” Lea wrinkles her nose.
I sigh. “I had no idea how hurt he was. Is.”
“He’s staying at Elise and Cal’s.” Lea presses her lips into a thin line.
Thayer twists her mouth. “So what’cha thinking? How you gonna shake him outta this and make him your man again?”
“The hell if I know, but I think I’m gonna start with an apology.”
“Better place than any at this point,” Thayer says.
“Well, there is something.” I bite my lip. “It’s a start, but I need something big. Huge.”
“Sarah, if I can help, I’m there.” Lea smiles. “He loves you. Malone and I both know it.”
“Thank you, I’m gonna need it.” I turn to Thayer, and she eyes me skeptically.
“Fine but if you hurt him ever again, I’m gonna kick your ass,”
“I’m well aware. And if you need to start getting rid of that anger, I know this chick named Kimberly. I want to hurt her.” I narrow my eyes.
“Ugh, she’s the worst.” Thayer rolls her eyes.
“Seriously, I hate her,” I seethe.
“Tell us how we can help.” Lea smiles as One walks through the door. He looks from me to Lea and back.
“Ladies, are we okay in here?” He leans against the door.
“Oh, yeah. You missed the excitement. Thayer’s gonna kick her ass, and Sarah’s gonna kick Kimberly’s ass. We’re all mad, and we’ve all cried. Now, we’re gonna make plans for Sarah to win Chord back.” Lea winks at him.
He raises his brows. “Whose ass are you gonna kick?”
“Baby, I only want your fine ass.” She crosses the room, pressing her lips to his.
“You fight dirty.” He grins boyishly, exactly like his brother.
“Oh, shut up. You like it.” Thayer giggles.
“Now I know where Chord gets it from.” My cheeks flame thinking of him.
“Hey, now. Calm down over there, you gotta get him back first.” Lea laughs.
“But that’s a start. No man alive turns down his woman if she’s willing to give him some good lovin’.” One chuckles.
My face flames. “Y’all, hush. I need to talk to him before I jump him.”
“It could work.” Thayer’s face is hysterical.
“Lea, I think we need a new bedroom suite.” I bite my lip. “And we have a few repairs, One.”
He rubs the back of his neck. “If he finds out I did this, he’s gonna be mad.”
“By the time I get him back in our bedroom, I promise you, it’ll be the last thing on his mind.” I smirk.
One throws his hands up as Thayer leans over and high-fives me. “Hell yes. Let’s do this.”
“I’m out.” One backs away.
“Let’s order a new bedroom suite, and you can pick the design this time.” Lea settles in with Chord’s computer.
“I love the blues and grays so I was thinking, a pewter wrought iron bed. Maybe he’ll not break this one.” I chuckle.
“Let’s hope not.” She sighs. “I love this one.” She turns the screen to me.
“Perfect. Can we get it by tomorrow?” I frown. “I’m gonna use the money he put into my account for this. I know he’s still paying technically.” I shrug.
“We can, I’ll have it there as soon as possible.” Lea nods. “I get it. Letting go of being independent isn’t easy, but it’s a start of letting him know you’re depending on him in a way.”
“Yes, he wanted me to know he was taking care of us, but I never gave in. I think it’s time I show him, I know he’s a good man and can take care of his family.” I sigh.
“It also helps to tell him you believe in him. And that you’re together,” Thayer says.
“Yep. Now, I need a big, ‘please forgive me, I’m an idiot’.”
“We need to ask a man.” Lea’s eyes are wide as we laugh.
“Good idea, but I think I might have something.” I stand, taking out my checkbook. “Can I leave this with you, I need to get moving.”
“Sure, this is a good thing.” Lea smiles.
“Let’s hope so, I love him. I’m nothing without him.” I hug them both and take off. I have a ton to do.
I make a couple of stops before heading home. If I’m gonna do this, it has to be done right. I’m going all out to win his heart back. I pull into the garage, walking over to some boards we have left from the build.
“This could work, maybe One can help me with it.” I bite my lip, trying to see the design before I start on it. I get a brain storm, so I hurry in the house and get it down on paper.
“I’ll need help. I can’t do it all on my own, and I know this is the only way to bring him back.” I get to work on my list, making sure I’ll have everything I need. It’s long and seems almost impossible, but I’ll make it work.
I shoot off a few quick texts, working on my help list. I decide to call One over, I need to see him in person. No one can know about this. I dial his number.
“Hello, Sarah.”
“I need you.” I hold my breath.
“Funny, I thought you were in love with Chord?” He chuckles.
I giggle. “Oh, hush. I need help with the bedroom and the bannister, when can you do it?”
“Hardy and I can run over this evening, it’s not as bad as it looks,” he says.
“I’ve gotten most of it cleaned out, but you’re right, it isn’t that bad.”
“You moved the bed on your own? You shouldn’t have done that,” he admonishes me.
“One, I’m responsible for it. Besides, it works into my whole ‘get my man home’ scenario.” My gut rolls. I hope it gets him home, anyway.
“We’ll be there around six.”
“Thank you.” I breathe a sigh of relief.
“Have you talked to him?” he asks, his voice low.
“No, I have a few more things to do first, but I will soon. I promise.”
“Alright, see ya later,” he says.
“Later.” I hang up, making my next call.
“Pennington Law.” Donna’s so sweet.
“May I speak with Walker?”
“Who’s calling?” she asks.
“Sarah Ha-Sutton.” Shit.
“Please hold.”
“Sarah, how are you?” Walker’s the best. He’s made me feel right at home.
“Not so good, but that’s another story. I need some help.”
“I’m in the business of helping,” he says.
“Is there anything I can do to expedite Silas’ birth certificate?” I chew my nail, waiting on him to answer.
“I actually happen to have some news on that, but Chord hasn’t returned my call.” I can hear papers shuffling.
“We had a fight, and I left.” I roll my eyes when my stomach twists. “I messed up, bad.”
“If there’s one thing I know about that family, they know how to forgive.” He sounds as if he knows.
“Let’s hope so. I’m not sure he will though.”
“Well, I hope what I’m holding in my hand helps.” My heart seizes.
“You’re kidding?”
“No, I can drop it off tomorrow,” he offers, making me love him so much more.
“Walker, I’m not sure what you’ve done in your past, but dude, you’re a helluva a man. I can never thank you enough for what you’ve done for us.” I dry my eyes, trying to control my falling tears.
“I thought you’d have heard by now, I was an ass,” he murmurs.
“You’ve redeemed yourself. And now, you’re helping me to do it.” I sigh. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome, Sarah. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He ends the call, and I scream with happiness.
“Perfect.” I twirl.
I head up the stairs to finish cleaning our room. I still need a big ‘forgive me’ but nothing’s coming to mind. I work the afternoon away, keeping my mind busy. I want to be ready for when One and Hardy get here.
I stop in Silas’ room to make the bed. I pick up my dirty clothes and
a few of his. I can’t help but smell them. I can’t wash them, so I open his drawer to put them in there and find his video camera.
My chest aches as I think of my baby. “Let’s go see what you have on here, little man.” I pop the memory card and head downstairs. I shove the card in, but One and Hardy arrive before I can watch it.
I open the door, letting them in. “Hey, y’all. It’s ready to go.”
They bring several tools in, setting them by the stairs. Hardy stops to wrap me in a hug. “Hey, sister. This is a good thing.”
“I hope so, Hardy. I have to get him home.” My heart thunders in my chest.
“This is a good start.” He walks up the stairs as I motion for One.
“Can you follow me?” His brows knit.
“Alright.” He joins me at the bar. I push my rudimentary drawing at him. His eyes flash to mine. “This is for?”
“I can’t tell you right now.” I furrow my brow.
“We can do this.” He nods.
“There are a few boards out by the garage we can use.”
“No, if you’re gonna do this and it’s what I think it is, we’re doing it right. Let’s text Thayer and she can order the material.” He takes his phone and grabs my pen. A few calculations later, he gives Thayer the order.
“Thank you.” I beam.
“I hope you know what you’re doing.” He raises his brows.
“Not in the least, but hell if I ain’t gonna try.” I giggle.
“Lord, help us.” One shakes his head.
“Hush, it’s a work in progress.”
“Speaking of, I’m going to help Hardy.” He turns to leave, but I have one more question.
“One more thing.” He pauses, tilting his head. “Do you know someone who can help me make a DVD with like, music?”
“Your nephew, Lath. He’s badass.” I grin. “His number is probably in your phone if I know Chord.”
I grab my phone, scrolling the numbers. “Yep, here he is.”
“Call him and tell him, ‘Dad said help’.” His smile is so big when he says ‘dad’.
“Will do.” I start dialing his number. “Thank you, Captain.” He chuckles when Hardy bursts into laughter as he carries down the parts of the bed I couldn’t.
I love having a huge family, something Silas enjoyed as well. I’m happy he got to see it. I hit dial.
