Mr Majeika and the Ghost Train

by Humphrey Carpenter

  HUMPHREY CARPENTER

  Mr Majeika and the

  Ghost Train

  Illustrated by Frank Rodgers

  PUFFIN

  Books by Humphrey Carpenter

  MR MAJEIKA

  MR MAJEIKA AND THE DINNER LADY

  MR MAJEIKA AND THE GHOST TRAIN

  MR MAJEIKA AND THE HAUNTED HOTEL

  MR MAJEIKA AND THE LOST SPELL BOOK

  MR MAJEIKA AND THE MUSIC TEACHER

  MR MAJEIKA AND THE SCHOOL BOOK WEEK

  MR MAJEIKA AND THE SCHOOL CARETAKER

  MR MAJEIKA AND THE SCHOOL INSPECTOR

  MR MAJEIKA AND THE SCHOOL PLAY

  MR MAJEIKA AND THE SCHOOL TRIP

  MR MAJEIKA ON THE INTERNET

  MR MAJEIKA VANISHES

  THE PUFFIN BOOK OF CLASSIC

  CHILDREN’S STORIES (Ed.)

  SHAKESPEARE WITHOUT THE BORING BITS

  MORE SHAKESPEARE WITHOUT THE

  BORING BITS

  Contents

  1. Hamish Gets a Letter

  2. All Aboard

  3. Jody Turns Detective

  4. Where the Weather Comes From

  5. Poor Old Dennis

  6. No More Spells

  7. Wilhelmina Has a Bit of Trouble

  8. Hamish Gets a Job

  PUFFIN BOOKS

  Published by the Penguin Group

  Penguin Books Ltd, 80 Strand, London WC2R 0RL, England

  Penguin Group (USA), Inc., 375 Hudson Street, New York, New York 10014, USA

  Penguin Books Australia Ltd, 250 Camberwell Road, Camberwell,

  Victoria 3124, Australia

  Penguin Books Canada Ltd, 10 Alcorn Avenue, Toronto, Ontario, Canada M4V 3B2

  Penguin Books India (P) Ltd, 11 Community Centre, Panchsheel Park,

  New Delhi – 110 017, India

  Penguin Books (NZ) Ltd, Cnr Rosedale and Airborne Roads, Albany, Auckland,

  New Zealand

  Penguin Books (South Africa) (Pty) Ltd, 24 Sturdee Avenue, Rosebank 2196, South Africa

  Penguin Books Ltd, Registered Offices: 80 Strand, London WC2R 0RL, England

  www.penguin.com

  First published by Viking 1994

  Published in Puffin Books 1995

  24

  Text copyright © Humphrey Carpenter, 1994

  Illustrations copyright © Frank Rodgers, 1994

  All rights reserved

  The moral right of the author and illustrator has been asserted

  Except in the United States of America, this book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, re-sold, hired out, or otherwise circulated without the publisher’s prior consent in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser

  British Library Cataloguing in Publication Data

  A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library

  ISBN: 978-0-14-194436-4

  1. Hamish gets a letter

  Somebody had stuck a poster on the wall just outside St Barty’s School:

  Opening next week

  ADVENTURE GALAXY

  The most exciting theme park in Britain!

  Fairy-tale Castles – Space Rides

  Roller-coasters – Haunted Houses

  Don’t wait to come and try it!!

  Most of Class Three were gathered round the poster. ‘That looks exciting,’ said Jody.

  ‘You bet,’ said Thomas. ‘Pete and I went to an adventure park for our birthday treat.’ (Thomas and Pete were twins.) ‘It was the best day of our lives.’

  ‘The rides were absolutely fabulous,’ agreed Pete. ‘There was a thing called the Giant Catapult, which shot you right up into the sky. It was really neat. I loved it.’

  ‘No you didn’t,’ said Thomas. ‘You were sick all over me.’

  ‘And you were terrified in the Haunted House,’ said Pete.

  ‘Those Haunted Houses are boring,’ said Jody. ‘Just people dressed up as skeletons, jumping out at you and shouting “Boo!” ’

  ‘This one was different,’ explained Thomas. ‘It was all done with lasers, and there were really horrid shapes coming at you out of the walls, making screeching noises.’

  ‘You were so frightened you shut your eyes and stuck your fingers in your ears,’ said Pete.

  ‘No I didn’t,’ said Thomas, and they began to have a fight about it, which was only stopped by the bell ringing for the start of school.

  When they got to their classroom, Mr Majeika was there, waiting to take the register. Mr Majeika had once been a wizard, and sometimes strange things happened when he was teaching Class Three. But most of the time he had to do the same boring things as other teachers, like taking the register, and getting cross with people who were late or badly behaved.

  This morning, Hamish Bigmore was late. Mr Majeika didn’t seem to be cross about this. ‘I think he likes it when Hamish is late,’ Jody whispered to Pete, ‘because then he doesn’t have to put up with Hamish being rude to him, and causing trouble all the time.’

  ‘Now, everyone,’ said Mr Majeika, when he had finished the register, ‘I’ve got a letter here, from the people who are opening the new Adventure Galaxy theme park, just down the road. They say that anyone who wants to can have a free ticket for the opening day.’

  Class Three cheered, and everyone said they would like tickets, so Mr Majeika began to hand them out. It was now that Hamish Bigmore walked through the door.

  He had a pocket computer game in his hand. It was playing loud music, and was making bleeping noises, and Hamish didn’t take his eyes off it even for a moment, as he walked to his place and sat down.

  ‘Hamish,’ warned Mr Majeika, ‘put that thing away at once.’ Hamish Bigmore didn’t even bother to answer; he just went on playing the computer game. ‘If you won’t do what I say,’ said Mr Majeika, growing very angry, ‘I shall have to – have to –’

  The trouble was, he didn’t know what. During his first term teaching Class Three, Mr Majeika had turned Hamish into a frog, and it had been very hard to turn him back again. Since then, he had tried other magical punishments for Hamish’s bad behaviour, but each time they had gone wrong.

  ‘I’ll tell you what you can do, Mr Majeika,’ said Hamish, grinning – and still playing his computer game while he talked. ‘You can send me into this game, so I can really play it myself, and not just press buttons. How about that?’

  Mr Majeika shook his head. It was just the sort of thing he found himself doing, when he muttered a spell over Hamish without stopping to think. He could imagine all the bother there would be if Hamish got into the computer game. There would have to be spells to fetch him out again, and probably they would bring all the creatures and things in the computer game out into the classroom too, and it would be ages before everything was back to normal.

  ‘No, I’ve got a better idea,’ said Mr Majeika. ‘If you don’t put that thing down at once, Hamish, I won’t let you have your free ticket for the opening of Adventure Galaxy.’

  Hamish seemed to be so surprised that he did stop playing the computer game. ‘Adventure Galaxy?’ he said, his mouth dropping open. ‘You must be joking, Mr Majeika. You don’t really think I want to go to that playground for little babies?’

  ‘It isn’t for babies, Hamish,’ said Jody. ‘It sounds very exciting.’

  ‘You think it’s exciting, do you?’ sneered Hamish at Jody. ‘Likkle baby Jody likes fairy-tale castles, does she? And likkle pretend haunted houses, where likkle pretend ghosties say boo to her? All right, likkle Jody, you go off to likkle Advent
ure Galaxy, and leave me here with something a bit more grown up.’ He started playing the computer game again.

  Mr Majeika was getting so angry that he knew in a moment he’d lose his temper, and there would be a spell, whether he meant to do it or not. Fortunately, just then, the classroom door opened.

  It was Mr Potter, the head teacher of St

  Barty’s, and he was holding an envelope. ‘Excuse me, Mr Majeika,’ he said, ‘but I have a letter here for Hamish Bigmore. It’s marked “Urgent”, so I thought I’d bring it in at once.’ He gave it to Hamish, and went away again.

  Hamish stopped playing the computer game, and opened the envelope. ‘Who’s it from, Hamish?’ called Thomas.

  ‘Perhaps it’s a love letter from his girl-friend,’ giggled Pete.

  ‘Hamish hasn’t got a girl-friend,’ said Jody, ‘except Wilhelmina Worlock.’

  Everyone laughed. Wilhelmina Worlock was a witch who sometimes turned up at St Barty’s School, and made a dreadful nuisance of herself. The only person who liked her was Hamish.

  Hamish didn’t reply; he put the letter in his pocket, switched off his computer game, and said to Mr Majeika: ‘I’d like to come to Adventure Galaxy, after all, please.’

  Nobody had ever heard Hamish say ‘please’ before. Mr Majeika was so surprised that he stopped being angry, and gave him a ticket. Hamish Bigmore behaved himself for the rest of the day, while Mr Majeika got on with teaching Class Three.

  After school was over, Jody hurried up to Thomas and Pete. ‘You know my joke about Hamish and Wilhelmina?’ she said. ‘Well, I was right. Hamish left the envelope on the floor, and it was addressed in her handwriting!’

  2. All aboard

  On the day of the free visit to Adventure Galaxy, Class Three arrived at the theme park early in the morning, even before the gates had opened. Mr Majeika was with them. ‘It was nice of Mr Potter to say we could do it as a school trip,’ he said, ‘but I don’t think there’s anything very educational about this place.’ He was looking doubtfully at the enormous rides they could see through the gates.

  ‘There’s one thing you’ll have to learn, Mr Majeika,’ said Jody. ‘Not to be sick when you get whizzed right up in the air, and then whizzed down again.’

  ‘I don’t think I’ll be very good at that,’ said Mr Majeika. ‘We used to have a game we played when I was a wizard. Each of us sat on a broomstick and whizzed through the air, and we tried to knock each other off. I always felt terribly sick.’

  ‘It sounds like the Dodgem Cars,’ said Pete, as the gates opened. ‘Come on, Mr Majeika, let’s see what you’re like driving a Dodgem.’

  But when Mr Majeika saw the Dodgem Cars, he said they were too frightening,

  and wouldn’t go on them. ‘That looks much nicer,’ he said, pointing at an old-fashioned roundabout, on which painted wooden horses were moving up and down at quite a gentle speed, while an organ played jolly music.

  ‘That’s just baby stuff, Mr Majeika,’ said Thomas. ‘Come on, we’ll take you on some really exciting rides.’

  Melanie, who was always finding something to cry about, burst into tears. ‘I want to go on the galloping horses!’ she wept.

  ‘All right, go on them, then,’ said Pete, ‘but don’t expect us to come with you.’

  Melanie sobbed even louder. ‘I’m too frightened to go by myself!’ she howled.

  ‘I’ll come with you, Melanie,’ said Mr Majeika, and the two of them climbed on to one of the galloping horses. The music began, the horse moved, and the

  roundabout turned faster and faster. It was very exciting. When it stopped, Mr Majeika felt quite giddy.

  ‘Oh, that was wonderful!’ cried Melanie. ‘I wish I could gallop away on this lovely horse.’

  ‘What a good idea,’ said Mr Majeika, who wasn’t thinking properly on account of feeling giddy. He muttered a spell, and in a moment the wooden horse had come to life. With Mr Majeika and Melanie still on its back, it leapt off the roundabout and galloped across Adventure Galaxy, weaving between the rides and the stalls selling sweets and refreshments. Since it was still quite early in the morning, there were very few people about. Mr Majeika quickly came to his senses, and realized that there would be awful trouble if he and Melanie stole one of the horses. So he made it go back on to the roundabout, and said a spell to turn it back to wood again. The man in charge of the roundabout (who had been counting money in his little office) hadn’t noticed anything odd.

  Of course, everyone in Class Three wanted a ride – a real ride – on a roundabout horse too, and they were very sad when Mr Majeika said no. The only person who didn’t seem interested was Hamish Bigmore. He kept looking around him, as if he was trying to find something.

  ‘What’s up with Hamish?’ Thomas asked Jody.

  ‘I don’t know,’ said Jody. ‘I bet it’s something to do with that letter he had from Wilhelmina Worlock. That’s why he wanted to come here. But I don’t see any sign of Miss Worlock, do you?’

  ‘No,’ said Pete, ‘thank goodness. We’ve seen enough of that dreadful old hag to last a lifetime.’

  Class Three walked through Adventure Galaxy looking at the other rides, but after the magical happening with the horse, everything seemed rather dull. Suddenly, Hamish got excited and began shouting: ‘There it is!’ he cried. ‘The Ghost Train!’

  Sure enough, a big sign over one of the rides said GHOST TRAIN in spooky writing. But it was rather a little train, and when Thomas and Pete peered behind the ride, there didn’t seem to be anywhere for it to go. ‘The really good Ghost Trains run on a very long track,’ said Pete. ‘But this one is tiny.’

  ‘Anyway,’ said Thomas, ‘it’ll only be people dressed up as ghosts, shouting “Boo”. It doesn’t say anything about lasers, or exciting things like that. Let’s go and see if there’s a Giant Catapult. That’ll be much more exciting.’

  ‘Oh no, we must go on this,’ said Hamish anxiously.

  ‘Must, Hamish?’ asked Mr Majeika suspiciously. ‘Why must we? Are you up to something?’

  Hamish shook his head hastily. ‘Oh no, Mr Majeika,’ he said. ‘I just thought everyone would enjoy it.’

  ‘He is up to something,’ Pete whispered to Thomas. ‘But I can’t think what. He’s probably got some friends hiding in there, who are going to throw buckets of goo over us, or something silly.’

  ‘You know Hamish hasn’t got any friends,’ whispered Thomas. ‘But I’m sure he’s got some trick up his sleeve.’ He turned to Mr Majeika.

  ‘Do be careful, Mr Majeika,’ he said. ‘There might be real ghosts in there.’

  ‘That would be fine,’ said Mr Majeika. ‘I know lots of ghosts, or at least I used to when I was a wizard, and they’re mostly frightfully nice. Come on!’

  There was no one in charge of the Ghost Train, but a notice said: Please take your seats, dearies, and the train will move when the bell rings.

  ‘ “Dearies” is a bit odd,’ said Jody. ‘It sounds the sort of thing Wilhelmina Worlock would say.’

  Just at that moment, the bell rang. ‘Quick, everyone!’ called Hamish, and they all climbed aboard – all except Melanie.

  ‘I’m frightened!’ she sobbed. ‘Jody, please look after me.’

  Jody sighed, and got off the train again. ‘Come on, Melanie,’ she said, ‘we’ll go and buy you a nice teddy bear balloon. See you all in five minutes!’ she called to Class Three.

  Off went Jody and Melanie, and the train started to move. Suddenly, Hamish Bigmore jumped off it. ‘Just remembered

  something I had to go and do!’ he called to Mr Majeika and Class Three. ‘Goodbye, everyone! And I really mean goodbye!’ He began to laugh a very nasty laugh.

  It took Jody and Melanie a little while to find a stall selling teddy bear balloons. They bought one, and came back to the Ghost Train.

  Except that the Ghost Train just wasn’t there. Where it had been standing, there was just an empty space.

  ‘Oh dear,’ said Jody. ‘I don’t like t
he look of this.’

  Melanie burst into tears again.

  3. Jody turns detective

  ‘There’s no point in crying,’ said Jody. ‘I expect the Ghost Train has been moved to some other part of Adventure Galaxy. We’ll just have to go and look.’

  So they went and looked. But there was no sign of the Ghost Train, and the more she thought about it, the more Jody reckoned it would have been impossible to move it in just a few minutes. It was very strange.

  ‘There’s Hamish!’ sobbed Melanie. ‘I bet horrid Hamish has something to do with it.’

  Hamish was wandering around with his hands in his pockets, looking pleased with himself.

  ‘What’s happened to the Ghost Train?’ Jody called to him. ‘Where’s Mr Majeika and Class Three?’

  Hamish grinned. ‘They’ve just gone on a much longer journey than they expected,’ he said, laughing nastily.

  Jody grabbed hold of Hamish’s arm. ‘What have you been up to?’ she said angrily. ‘What have you done with them? When will they be back again?’

  ‘I don’t know anything about it,’ said Hamish, trying to stamp on Jody’s toes.

  ‘You just said you did!’ shouted Jody. ‘You said they’d gone on a long journey. When will they be back?’

  ‘I don’t know if they will be,’ sneered Hamish nastily. ‘A friend of mine is looking after them for a bit, and if you’re nasty to me, she may never send them back at all!’

  ‘I can guess who that is,’ said Jody, trying to twist Hamish’s arm. ‘You had a letter from Wilhelmina Worlock.

  She’s behind this, isn’t she?’

  ‘It wasn’t a letter, it was just a Christmas card,’ said Hamish, who was obviously lying, since it wasn’t Christmas. ‘Let go of me, or I’ll turn my Death Ray Gun on you.’ He took a plastic gun out of his pocket and waved