Lang Downs

by Ariel Tachna

“I know what you mean,” Jesse said with a laugh. “Go on inside before Kami starts shouting.”

  CHRIS SPENT the morning alternating between anticipating getting rid of the itchy stubble on his face and wondering what else might come of having Jesse shave him. The date comment had slipped out without conscious thought, but it wasn’t like he hadn’t thought about it. Some days it felt like he hadn’t thought about anything else. Not that they could actually “date” out here in the outback, but it hadn’t stopped Chris from fantasizing about Jesse.

  The man was gorgeous, funny, kind, confident… everything Chris could possibly want in a man, and knowing he was gay too, even if he wasn’t the least bit interested in Chris, had been enough to set off more erotic dreams than Chris could ever remember having all at once. Then again, when he’d been in town, he’d figured out where to go when he needed relief. A quick blow job in the back room of a bar usually took the edge off. Until his mum died, anyway. It had gotten harder after he and Seth were on his own. Harder to leave, harder to justify the cost of even a few beers, harder to indulge his own selfish needs when Seth was shivering under a blanket that was far too thin in a drafty flat with insufficient heating.

  He shook his head against the maudlin thoughts. Those days were over. For one thing, it was spring heading into summer. It wouldn’t be cold for much longer, even up here in the tablelands. More importantly, though, the station house, while simple, was solidly built and comfortable. Seth would be safe here, even if Chris arranged to go into town for a weekend. Jesse could probably tell him where he could find a place to hook up. He hadn’t worked out of Boorowa before, but Cowra wasn’t that much farther away, and Chris did have his car. Assuming Caine and Macklin would give him a weekend off.

  Or there was Jesse himself. He was gay, unattached as far as Chris knew, and just as alone out here as Chris was. He’d laughed at Chris’s date comment, but he hadn’t actually rejected it out of hand. Chris certainly couldn’t deny his own attraction. More mornings than not since they’d met, he’d come awake hard as a rock with Jesse’s face haunting him. Jerking off with his left hand was about as awkward as trying to shave with his left hand, but he’d done it anyway. He hadn’t had a choice if he wanted his pants to fit right. And now, knowing that in a few hours he’d have Jesse alone in that little bathroom, Jesse’s hands on his face as he shaved Chris, smearing shaving cream, running the razor over his cheeks, checking for stray whiskers….

  “If you’re done daydreaming over there, we have a meal to prepare,” Kami said, snapping Chris out of his fantasy.

  Chris blinked a couple of times and went back to awkwardly slicing potatoes for the au gratin Kami had decided to make for dinner. He could think about Jesse later.

  When he’d finished his hours in the kitchen and Kami ordered him out, Chris debated what to do next. He’d gotten in the habit of hanging out with Jesse and the other mechanics because he liked Jesse and because that was usually where he could find Seth. He didn’t think Seth would get up to his usual tricks with the other jackaroos, but he couldn’t be entirely sure. Today, though, with his slip of the tongue that morning and the thought of Jesse shaving him that evening both in the forefront of his thoughts, Chris wasn’t sure it was such a good idea. He’d end up either saying something else to embarrass himself, or he wouldn’t say anything (to avoid saying something embarrassing) and Jesse would wonder what was wrong with him.

  Fate took that choice from his hands when he left the kitchen and found Seth waiting for him. “Come on,” Seth said. “I have to show you something.”

  Chris followed him dutifully toward the shed where the mechanics were still working on the tractor. He had no idea what Seth might want to show him since he didn’t know one end of an engine from the other, but his brother was clearly excited. Chris would be appropriately excited for him.

  “Look!” Seth said when they entered the shed to a chorus of greetings from Patrick, Jesse, and the other two mechanics. He held up a tiny piece of machinery. “I found the problem!”

  Chris glanced at Jesse for confirmation. He knew Seth loved machines, but to have found something four more experienced men had missed was impressive. Jesse nodded slightly. “That’s great, Seth!”

  Seth started gushing about what he’d done and how he’d figured it out.

  “You don’t have the slightest idea what he’s talking about, do you?” Jesse said at Chris’s shoulder.

  “Not a word,” Chris replied, “but he’s proud and happy, and everyone else seems impressed so he obviously did something right.”

  “He did. Now we can fix the broken piece and put this monster back together again. Macklin will be pleased.”

  That was encouraging. If Seth proved his worth as a mechanic, maybe Caine and Macklin would overlook Chris’s own lack of contributions to the station to date.

  “Smile,” Jesse said. “Seth’s going to think you aren’t happy for him.”

  Chris hadn’t realized he’d stopped smiling. “Sorry,” he said, restoring a more positive expression. “I just seem to be in a down mood today.”

  “It’s got to be hard, not being able to do stuff for yourself,” Jesse said. “I think you’re coping really well.”

  “Really?” Chris asked, tickled that Jesse thought so highly of him. “I barely feel like I’m keeping my head above water.”

  “But you are keeping it above water and that’s the important thing,” Jesse said. “Even when it doesn’t feel that way.”

  “Thanks,” Chris said, his smile becoming more genuine. “That makes me feel better.”

  “You’ll feel even better when we get that rat’s nest off your face this afternoon.”

  “It’s not that bad!” Chris protested, rubbing at the scraggly beard with his left hand. “Is it?”

  “No, it’s not bad at all,” Jesse said. “It makes you look a little rough around the edges. Some guys even find that sexy.”

  “Some guys?” Chris repeated, wondering if he should leave the scruff after all.

  “Yeah, but not me,” Jesse said. “Whisker burn is a real turn off for me. Call me a nancy boy if you want, but it’s smooth skin all the way for me.”

  “Just on the face or smooth all over?” Chris asked, wondering if he’d have to start waxing his chest. The thought of it made him want to wince, but if he had a chance with Jesse, he wouldn’t blow it over that.

  “Body hair is fine,” Jesse said. “It’s got a different texture than a beard, not as sharp.”

  Chris hoped he managed to hide his relief both at not being inherently unattractive to Jesse and at not having to consider waxing in order to have a hope of catching Jesse’s attention.

  “Have a seat if you want,” Jesse said. “Now that we know what’s wrong, we should spend at least a few hours repairing it, but we’ll get you fixed up before dinner too.”

  Chris smiled and took his habitual seat by the tool box. He still couldn’t make heads or tails of the engine, but he’d learned enough to hand Jesse what he needed most of the time.

  FOUR HOURS later, the pile of metal had started to look like an engine again, Patrick, Jesse, and the other mechanics were covered in grease and grime, and Chris was about ready to come out of his skin with anticipation. He’d focused on Jesse’s hands as he worked, watching the way they moved so dexterously over the machinery. He wanted to feel those hands on him. He’d settle for having them on his face, but he’d dream of more now that he’d noticed them.

  Handing the last of his tools back to Chris, Jesse wiped his hands on a greasy rag. “Shall we go get you sorted before dinner?” Jesse asked. “I’d like to have time to take a shower.”

  “Sure,” Chris said, doing his best to hide his growing anticipation. “Or you can shower first if you want. Even if you end up helping me after dinner instead of before, that’s fine with me.”

  “I’ll help you first,” Jesse said. “Let me just wash my hands.”

  Chris shifted from one foot to the other, trying to
conceal the tension in the pit of his stomach. Jesse took his time scrubbing his hands with the industrial strength soap they kept in the machine shed to cut the grease, taking extra care with his fingernails and around his cuticles. Chris had never paid such close attention before, so he didn’t know if Jesse always spent this much time cleaning up or if this was extra effort for Chris’s sake. Chris couldn’t decide which option he preferred. It spoke well of Jesse that he made the effort to get his hands clean at the end of the day, but at the same time, Chris wanted to be special enough in Jesse’s eyes to merit extra cleaning.

  Finally, Jesse turned off the water and dried his hands. “That’s about as clean as they’re going to get.”

  Chris couldn’t see any trace of grease left. “Looks good to me. I, um, I guess we should go back to the station house. All my stuff is there.”

  “It’ll be more comfortable there than trying to do it in the bunkhouse with all the other jackaroos around,” Jesse agreed. “No need to give them something to talk about.”

  Chris remembered the way the jackaroos had speculated on Caine and Macklin’s relationship. “Do they do that a lot? Talk about the bosses?”

  “No,” Jesse replied as they walked toward the house. “They rag on each other far more than on the bosses. Neil shuts down any discussion of Caine, even joking ones, faster than you can blink, and the others don’t fight him on it. The love lives of the other jackaroos are fair game, though. Even Neil’s.”

  Chris grinned. “Neil?”

  “He’s apparently gone on one of the jillaroos who came back again this summer,” Jesse explained. “Since he won’t let them talk about Caine and Macklin, they talk about him instead, and his authority doesn’t seem to extend to keeping them from that.”

  “He better watch it or they’ll stop listening when he says something about Caine and Macklin.”

  “I think that’s why he doesn’t shut them down when they talk about him.” Jesse stopped on the veranda. “I haven’t been inside the station house before.”

  “It’s just a house,” Chris said, opening the door for Jesse. “A nice one, but just a house. You’re helping me out. I’m sure they won’t mind.”

  They left their boots at the door and climbed the stairs to the bathroom. Chris handed Jesse the shaving cream and his neglected razor. “I put a new blade on it earlier today so it should be sharp.”

  “Good.” Jesse sprayed some shaving cream into his palm. “You might want to take your shirt off so I don’t get this all over your clothes by accident.”

  Chris frowned, not wanting Jesse to see him struggling with the buttons, but Jesse was right. He couldn’t shave himself without dripping water and shaving foam everywhere. He’d be soaked through and then have to deal with the shirt after it was wet. He popped the first button one-handed, but the second one was more difficult.

  “Here, let me help,” Jesse offered. He rinsed the shaving cream off his hand quickly and reached for the buttons. Chris froze at the brush of hard knuckles against his sternum as Jesse worked his way down the front of Chris’s shirt. He’d torn his shirt off over his head in the heat of passion before or even had a hookup pull it off, but no one had ever undressed him like this, slow and careful like he mattered. He swallowed around the constriction in his throat, hoping he wouldn’t sprout wood while Jesse’s hands were near his belt. That would be too embarrassing.

  Chris started to pull away when Jesse finished undoing the buttons and reached for the collar of his shirt to help him pull it off, but he wanted the sensation of Jesse undressing him, even if only to shave him. By the time Jesse got his shirt off, Chris’s skin tingled from the cool air and the brush of Jesse’s hands, and his cock had woken up and taken notice of the proceedings.

  “Okay, let’s see about getting you cleaned up,” Jesse said. The ease in his words relieved Chris’s worry that Jesse would be as tense about the situation as Chris was. Chris turned back around to face Jesse, his heart pounding as the other man smeared shaving cream over his cheeks and around his mouth. His hands were gentle, taking care not to get the foam in Chris’s nose or on his lips, which only made Chris’s lips tingle more. Jesse’s face was so close as he bent in to start shaving Chris, the rasp of the razor loud in the otherwise silent room.

  Chris did his best to keep his breathing slow and steady so he wouldn’t jostle Jesse’s hand and end up with a cut on his face, but his pulse raced even faster when Jesse tilted his head to the side so he could work his way along Chris’s jaw and down his neck. He couldn’t stop the shiver that went through him when Jesse ran his fingers over the shaved skin, checking for stray whiskers.

  “Cold?” Jesse asked sympathetically. “It is a bit cool in here, now that I think about it.”

  “I’m fine,” Chris said, his voice hoarser than usual.

  Jesse’s fingers caught on a patch of stubble he’d missed. He leaned closer as he ran the razor over it again, and Chris caught a whiff of sweat, machine oil, and cologne. He couldn’t place the scent exactly, but his body reacted to it. He gripped the edge of the sink behind him with his good hand as he resisted the urge to reach for Jesse. Not until he had some indication the other man wanted Chris the way Chris wanted him.

  “Okay, that side’s done,” Jesse said, his voice sounding different enough to Chris’s ears that he looked up. Jesse’s green eyes were darker than usual, and his gaze seemed even more intent. Chris swallowed hard.

  “Thanks.”

  “Turn the other way now.”

  Jesse’s fingers felt hot on Chris’s freshly shaved skin as they guided his head to the right so Jesse could start shaving the left side of Chris’s face. The razor connected and scraped across Chris’s cheek, but Jesse’s fingers stayed where they were, not holding Chris in place, just… touching.

  Chris closed his eyes. Watching Jesse shave him was too much. He’d end up doing something stupid like blurting out how much he really wanted Jesse to kiss him right now, or maybe throw him down on the bathroom floor and fuck him silly. He’d take either one and be thrilled.

  The razor’s movements stopped, followed again by the brush of Jesse’s fingers over the newly shaved skin. He shivered again, a little gasp escaping. His eyes flew open, searching Jesse’s face for any sign he’d heard it, only to find Jesse far closer than when he’d closed his eyes. Jesse’s thumb brushed over Chris’s chin, the nail just skirting his lower lip, and Chris lost his battle for control, another little moan sounding in his throat.

  Jesse hovered at that slight distance for a moment, his eyes searching Chris’s face—for what, Chris didn’t know. Whatever he saw must have reassured him, because he closed the space between them, his lips covering Chris’s in a tender kiss.

  Chris froze, afraid to move for fear of running Jesse off, but the contact continued, Jesse’s lips moving lightly over his, asking for a kiss in return but demanding nothing. It was everything a kiss was supposed to be and nothing like anything Chris had experienced in his backroom pickups. His lips parted of their own accord, offering Jesse more if he wanted it. Jesse’s tongue swiped once over Chris’s lower lip, but he didn’t invade Chris’s mouth or otherwise change the tenor of the kiss.

  Needing something to steady himself, Chris reached instinctively for Jesse, drawing him closer with a hand to his hip. Jesse moved in, his body hemming Chris in, leaving him feeling surrounded. With a different man, he might have felt trapped, but he wanted to be exactly where he was far too much for that to bother him now. Jesse’s shirt rasped against Chris’s skin, the buttons pulling a little as they got tangled in Chris’s chest hair. The little tugs only served to remind Chris that he was half-naked while Jesse was still fully clothed. Saying anything about it would have required ending the kiss, so he let his good hand speak for him, tugging at the tail of Jesse’s shirt to loosen it from his waistband.

  “Chris, are you upstairs?”

  Caine’s voice shattered the moment. Jesse pulled back enough to let Chris answer without releasing him
completely. Chris struggled for something to say, but getting his voice to work at all was a challenge.

  “Yes,” he finally managed to call back down to Caine.

  “Okay, just checking. I saw boots and weren’t sure whose they were.”

  “I should go,” Jesse said, his voice warm as he leaned forward and rubbed his stubbled cheek against Chris’s smooth one. “We don’t want the boss to come upstairs and find us making out. Can you wash the last of the shaving cream off by yourself?”

  Chris wanted to say no so he could keep Jesse there a little longer, but that was selfish, and Caine was downstairs and could come upstairs at any time. While Chris didn’t think Caine would have a problem with Jesse helping him shave, he didn’t know how Caine would feel about Jesse doing other things to him, and that’s what certainly would have happened if they hadn’t been interrupted.

  “I’m sure I can manage,” Chris said. “I’ll see you at dinner?”

  “I’ll be there,” Jesse said with that warm, crooked smile that did things to Chris’s insides. “And after dinner, we’ll find somewhere a little more private to finish what we started. If you’re interested, of course.”

  Interested? Hell, yes, he was interested!

  “Tell me where and when,” Chris said, not even caring how breathless and eager he sounded. “I, um, I don’t have any condoms.”

  Jesse chuckled, the sound so masculine and self-assured that Chris felt his toes curl in anticipation. “We’ll figure something out.” He leaned back in and kissed Chris again, quickly. “See you at dinner.”

  Seven

  JESSE WAITED until he was outside putting on his boots to start whistling, figuring he didn’t need to attract Caine’s attention on his way out. He hadn’t done anything wrong. Chris was of age, and everything that had happened had been mutual, but Caine might not see it that way, and arguing with the boss was a sure way to kill the buzz of desire from the kiss and from the thought of meeting Chris later to see what else they could get up to.