Finding Hope (A Chance and a Hope Book 2)

by SJ McCoy

  “Too old? At thirty-three? I’m thirty-six.”

  “Yeah, but it’s different for guys, isn’t it?”

  “I suppose so, but not much. If we had a kid this year, I’d be fifty-five before they were eighteen, and you’d be …” The way she was looking at him made him stop. He realized that he was talking about them having a child together.

  “Hypothetically speaking, of course.”

  He nodded. “Of course.” He took a big gulp of his wine. What the hell was he thinking? He was relieved when his phone started to ring in his pocket. He wasn’t going to answer it, but at least it provided a distraction.

  “You should get that. I don’t mind.” She got up and took some of the dishes back to the kitchen.

  Chance pulled his phone out of his back pocket, wishing he’d remembered to put it on vibrate. It was Missy. He frowned. Sometimes she called just to chat, but since their dad had his stroke, Chance liked to answer her straight away, just in case something was wrong. “Hey, Miss. What’s up?”

  “Hi, Chancey. Nothing’s up. I was just wondering how you’re doing. You’ve been grumpy since you got back from Oregon.”

  “I’m fine. I’m always grumpy, you know me.”

  She laughed. “Yeah, but I’ve been worried about you. I keep wondering about Hope Davenport. I saw a story about her being with some country singer and then she disappeared out of the news again.”

  Chance nodded. He didn’t know what he could say without saying everything.

  “You’re going to call me crazy, but I keep hoping that she’s with you, up there in Montana.”

  Chance laughed. He had to.

  “Oh, my God! She is, isn’t she?”

  “Yup.”

  “Oh, Chance! Why didn’t you tell me? I’ve been so worried about you.”

  “You worry too much. There’s nothing to tell.”

  Hope came back out and placed the lasagna on the table.

  “Hang on.” Chance covered the phone with his hand. “It’s my sister, Missy. I won’t be a minute.”

  Hope smiled. “Take your time and say hi to her for me. I can put this back in the oven if you like?”

  “No. I …” He could hear Missy laughing down the phone.

  “Say hi back to her for me, tell her I can’t wait to meet her.”

  “Will do. I’ll talk to you soon.”

  Missy laughed. “No, tell her now, so I can hear.”

  Chance chuckled. “You’re a piece of work, you know?”

  “I take after my big brother. Just tell her, and then you can get back to your dinner.”

  Chance smiled at Hope. “She says to say hi back to you and that she can’t wait to meet you.”

  Hope smiled, and Missy chuckled down the line. “Thank you.”

  Hope reached out for his phone, and Chance surrendered it with a sigh. There was no use resisting or thinking that he was in charge of anything when it came to these two women.

  “Hello, Missy.” Hope smiled at him as she spoke. “Thank you. I can’t wait to meet you, too.” She smiled down at him. “I’d love to. Do you think I’ll be able to talk him into it?” She laughed. “I like the way you think. We’ll figure it out between us. … You too … Okay … Bye.”

  Chance was surprised to see her end the call before handing the phone back to him with a wicked smile. “I don’t get to say goodbye to my sister?”

  Hope laughed. “She said it was probably best for both of us if I hung up.”

  Chance shook his head with a rueful smile. “I’m sure it is. What’s she scheming?”

  “She wants us to go to Summer Lake to visit.”

  Chance nodded slowly. That might not be a bad idea. But then again, it might be a horrible idea. Did he really want to take Hope to the place he and Chloe had shared, to the town where they thought they’d live out their lives?

  “She said if you don’t like the idea, I should tell you how much your dad and Alice would like to see me again.”

  Chance rolled his eyes. “That’s below the belt.”

  “She also said to remind you that she fights dirty.”

  He had to laugh. “She ain’t kidding about that.”

  Hope came around the table and put her hand on his shoulder, bending down to drop a kiss on his lips. “I’m not trying to make you take me there. It’s just a bit of fun. I like Missy, it’s nice to be able to gang up on you with her, but I understand.”

  He pulled her down into his lap and kissed her deeply. Why was she so understanding? And why was it that when she did understand his doubts and his weakness, he wanted to step up and prove to her that he was better than that. When they came up for air, he smiled. “We should go. I’d like you to see the place. And she’s right, Dad and Alice would love to see you again.”

  She grinned at him happily. “When?”

  “That one’s a bit tougher. Next time we meet up, we could meet there? It’s much closer for you to get to from LA.”

  He felt like he’d said the wrong thing. A look of disappointment flashed across her face, but she covered it quickly.

  ~ ~ ~

  Hope smiled, trying to hide her disappointment. For a moment there, she’d stupidly thought they might go to visit his family in the next few days. She needed to reel it back in. As far as Chance was concerned, this was a two-week visit, and that was all. She should be grateful that he was talking about meeting up again and taking her to see his family. She shouldn’t want to rush him into more so soon.

  After they’d eaten, they sat out on the deck watching the sun go down. The sunset was amazing, the sky turning from blue to crimson to gold before the dusk finally fell. She turned to look at Chance.

  He nodded. “The sky out here fascinates me; I can watch it for hours.”

  She smiled. “Me too, it’s one of the things I love most about this place.”

  “And yet you don’t come here anymore?”

  “I do now.”

  He met her gaze. “But apart from me, there’s nothing for you here, is there?”

  She sucked in a deep breath. It was as though he was reading the thoughts she’d had earlier. “I haven’t been here, and so I don’t have anything going on here. I’m sure I’d find things to do.”

  His brows came down. “What do you mean?”

  Oh, crap. She’d been answering her own question about what she could do if she stayed here. A question that he hadn’t even asked. “I mean, you make me want to be around you. If we’re going to keep seeing each other in any meaningful way then we kind of need to be in the same place. I can leave LA; you can’t leave here.”

  To her surprise, his face relaxed, and he nodded. “So, we’ve both been thinking about the same things again, but as usual, you’re the one who’s brave enough to talk about it.”

  She smiled. “I think dumb is a better word than brave. It’s probably smarter not to bring it up till we know where we might be headed, but I can’t help it. I wonder what we could do. And, honestly, if we’re not going to be able to make it work, I’d rather we figure that out now.”

  Chance nodded sadly. “You’re right, again.”

  “Glad you noticed.” She tried to make a joke out of it, but the conversation had turned serious. “What are you thinking?” The look on his face worried her.

  He sighed. “I’m trying to talk myself out of jumping to a negative conclusion.”

  “Good, and while you’re at it, please would you talk yourself out of making any decisions that you think are best for me?”

  He gave her a rueful smile. “Are you mind reading?”

  “No, but I know you well enough to worry about your line of reasoning.”

  “Which is?”

  “Obviously I don’t know for certain, but I’d guess that you think since you can’t leave your life here, it wouldn’t be fair to ask me to leave my life in LA, so you’re considering whether you should break things off with me now—and tell yourself that it’s for my good.”

  He nodded. �
�That’s pretty much where I was going.”

  Her heart sank. “But you don’t get to decide what’s best for me.”

  “I know, and even if I did, I don’t think I could go through with it.”

  “Why?”

  “Because I don’t want to lose you.”

  Wow! She couldn’t help the smile that spread across her face. “I don’t want to lose you either. So, how about instead of taking it all upon yourself to figure out what’s best, you work with me? Can we be a team and figure out how we can both get what we want?”

  He nodded. “I’d like that, but I don’t know how to be a team.”

  “Neither do I, but we can figure it out as we go along. If we just keep talking to each other. Let’s just be honest about everything, not make decisions by ourselves that affect the other.”

  “Okay. In that case, can I be honest about something that affects you?”

  She nodded, wondering what was coming.

  “I saw Carter today. I told you that all the brothers take a turn to host dinner each week. This week is Carter and Summer’s turn. He came to ask if I wanted to bring you.”

  “And do you?”

  He shrugged. “I don’t know. Yes, part of me does. I want you to meet them; I want them to meet you. I want to show you off, I won’t deny it, and part of me wants to belong in a way I never have. I want to go there as part of the family, bringing my girl with me.” His smile faded. “But is it fair, is it right? How comfortable would you be?” His arm tightened around her shoulders. “And how am I going to feel in January when you’re not here anymore, and every time I go to dinner with them, I remember the one time you were there?” He gave her a sad smile. “I could sit the little bear in your chair next to me, but it wouldn’t be the same.”

  She wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. “Thank you for telling me. I can’t decide all your parts for you. I can’t tell you what to do for you, but I can tell you that I’d like to go. I’d like to meet them, and I’d like to feel like a part of your life, your girl, even if it doesn’t work out for us in the long run.” She smiled. “Like all the tourists who never get to come back to Yellowstone again the rest of their lives, at least we’ll have the bear.”

  He chuckled. “It’s better to have loved and lost, then? Is that what you’re saying.”

  “I am, but I can only say that for me. I don’t know if you can feel the same way. You’ve already loved and lost.”

  “I have, and for all it’s cost me over the years, I wouldn’t change it. I wouldn’t give up the short time that Chloe and I had together just to avoid all the pain I’ve lived afterward.”

  Hope nodded. She mustn’t let herself get carried away; he wasn’t really talking about loving her. Was he?

  Chapter Thirteen

  When Chance rode back into the yard after work on Thursday, he was a little irritated to see Mason and Beau standing outside the barn talking. He didn’t want to hang around wasting time with them. Hope had come down to the cabin to meet him so they could go to Carter and Summer’s place together.

  Beau smiled at him when he slid down from Rio. “Is Maverick still out? Seems he’s been lame longer than I was.”

  “He’s fine again now. I just want to ease him back in. I’m going to take him out mornings next week, start him out on half days.”

  Beau nodded. “It’s a good thing you’ve got Rio as a backup.”

  Mason pursed his lips. “But we could use another backup or two. Shane’s going to need Rio for ranch guests soon; the season’s starting to pick up.”

  “I told him to just let me know when he needs him,” said Chance. He’d been thinking about looking for a second horse to call his own while Maverick was out lame. His thoughts went back to Hercules, the horse he’d ridden in Oregon. He’d love to bring him out here, but he wasn’t a cow horse.

  Mason held up a hand. “It’s all good. I need to get out of here. Gina wants to get up to Carter’s place early. We’re hoping to get Phoenix fed and down to sleep before we all eat.”

  “Good luck with that,” said Beau with a grin. “You know damned well that Corinne and Summer are going to be cooing over her the whole time and wanting to get her up and hold her.”

  “Yeah. We can hope, though.” Mason turned to Chance. “Speaking of Hope, are you going up the valley to pick her up?”

  “No, she’s waiting for me at the cabin.” He tethered Rio and uncinched his saddle. “I need to take care of this guy and get home for a shower. We’ll see you up there.”

  Mason nodded and left them to make his way up the path to the main house. Beau stayed and waited until Chance met his gaze. “Dare I ask how it’s going with her?”

  Chance nodded. “It’s going great. She’s awesome.”

  “I’m happy for you. Is it … serious?”

  Chance shrugged. “We’d both like it to be, but there’s so much standing in the way of that.”

  “Like what?”

  Chance let out a short laugh. “Like where we both live, our very different backgrounds, her dad, my past … shall I go on?”

  Beau chuckled. “No need. I think I get the gist of it, but it sounds to me like all those things can be overcome. Except maybe one.”

  Chance raised an eyebrow, wondering which one.

  Beau sighed. “Where you live doesn’t matter so much, if what you want most is to be together. Your backgrounds don’t matter to the two of you, so whatever anyone else thinks doesn’t matter. Her dad could be a big obstacle, but rich girls have run off with country boys since time began. He’s an obstacle, but not an insurmountable one. The only thing that can stop the two of you is your past.”

  Chance blew out a sigh. He knew it was true.

  Beau nodded. “But it’ll only stop you if you want it to. It’s your choice. Just remember that when the going gets tough, always remember that you get to decide. And I’m going to say this, and then run.”

  Chance smiled. “What?”

  “Chloe would want you to be happy. She loved you. Don’t make her your excuse not to be happy, don’t blame her.”

  Chance closed his eyes and swallowed down the anger that surged up. “I would never blame her! It’s not her fault she died!”

  Beau held up a hand and backed away. “Like I told you, I need to run. I’ll see you at Carter’s in a little while. But think it over. Hate me for the words if you want to, but give them some thought anyway.” He turned around and made his way down the new path behind the barn that led to the house he’d built down by the creek.

  Once he’d gone, Chance blew out a big sigh, making Rio turn around to look at him. “It’s okay, old fella.” Chance rubbed his nose.

  Once he’d finished brushing down Rio and turned him out, Chance made his way to the cabin. He was relieved when he saw the Land Rover parked around the side. He’d been worried when it wasn’t parked out front. He walked by it, going straight to the back porch, which seemed to be Hope’s favorite place to hang out. She was sitting there looking more beautiful than ever in a pair of faded jeans and a pink shirt. She smiled when she saw him.

  “Hey, honey. I’m home.”

  She laughed. “Not for long. We’re going to have to leave soon if you don’t want to be late.”

  Chance raised an eyebrow. She seemed on edge. Was she mad at him for being later than he said he’d be? “Yeah, I’m sorry. I ran into Mason and Beau at the barn while I was taking care of Rio.”

  She shook her head. “I’m not worried about that. I’m worried about being late.” She was turning her bracelet around and around on her wrist.

  Realization dawned, and Chance had to smile. “You’re nervous?”

  She hung her head and peeked up at him from under her eyebrows. “Yes.”

  He laughed and went to squat down in front of her. He tilted her chin with his thumb, forcing her to look him in the eye. “The mighty Hope Davenport is nervous?”

  She rolled her eyes. “There’s nothing mighty about me. I
’m a coward when it comes to meeting people. Especially important people.”

  He laughed. “We’re talking about the Remingtons; they’re my brothers in all but blood.”

  She nodded, her eyes wide. “Exactly! And that’s what makes them so important. What if they don’t like me?”

  He laughed. “They’re going to love you. You’ve already met Shane; he thinks you’re awesome, the others will, too. And the girls are great.”

  “I’m sure they are, but they’re all friends, they all know each other. I’m this intruder in their midst.”

  He took hold of her hand and gave it a squeeze. “They’re not like that. They’ll welcome you with open arms. They’ll all go out of their way to make you feel comfortable. Trust me?”

  “I have to.”

  He sighed. “No, you don’t. I can call Carter and tell them we can’t make it.”

  She shook her head rapidly. “No! You can’t do that. I really do want to meet them. I’m just being silly.”

  Chance nodded though he tried to soften it with a smile. “It’ll be fine. I need to jump in the shower if we’re not going to be late, but I promise you, you’ll enjoy it.”

  When he was ready, they got in the truck. At the top of the driveway, he stopped before turning out onto East River Road. “I wouldn’t take you if I didn’t think you’d enjoy yourself. If I didn’t think you’d like them, or they’d like you. But I need you to know, that you’re my number one priority. If you want to leave, we’ll leave. You need to give me some kind of signal to come rescue you.”

  She reached across and took hold of his hand. “Thank you. I know I’m being silly. I’m sure they’re awesome, but knowing that you’ve got my back means more than you know. I haven’t felt like anyone’s had my back my whole life. Well, except Oscar.”

  “In that case I like him,” said Chance with a smile. “Playboy or deviant genius or whatever he is, I don’t care. If he’s got your back, then he’s all right in my book.”