Everything I Have (Everything I Want #3)

by Natalie Barnes

  Sophia angles her head all the way back so she can kiss me deeper, her sweet tongue tasting my mouth. Her long hair brushes over my arm. I give her succulent bottom lip a quick tug before pulling my mouth away.

  With my eyes still closed, I rest my forehead against the top of her head, trying to control my breathing. It’s so fucking hard to stop with her once I get a taste. God, I want her so fucking bad right now.

  “Come on,” her gentle voice says to me as she tugs on my hand.

  I blink my eyes open and my girl smiles up at me. So fucking beautiful.

  Once we get into the room, Sophia pulls off my hoodie.

  “I think I’m just gonna jump in the shower real quick,” she says, tossing it on the sofa.

  Damn, I would give my fucking right eye to join her right now. Locking my jaw tight, I tip my chin up.

  “Okay.”

  I’m trying my fucking hardest to give her one last smile, so I give her the one I now gets her hot every time; that panty dropping grin, as she sometimes teases me. Something flashes in Sophia’s eyes again, and she spins around and takes off, going through the sitting area and heading straight to the bedroom.

  When the door closes, I roll my neck around my shoulders, cracking it. Scratching my chin, I head over to the mini bar and grab a Coke and candy bar, then take off over to the sofa. The water pipes begin to scream through the old walls. A few minutes go by, and they go silent. Bending over, I rest my forearms on my thighs and lower my head.

  Someone bangs hard on the door a couple times. Raising my head, I just stare at it. I don’t really know how long I just sit there motionless like that, but after hearing the knock again, I push my hands off my knees and stand, walking over to the door.

  My damn hands are so fucking sweaty that I almost lose my grip on the handle. Opening it, a larger man stands behind a scrawny, middle-aged man wearing a black coat and pulling a rolling case beside him. I raise my eyebrow in suspicion. This must be who Lux sent. I glance past him and the larger man nods his head at me.

  “This is Doctor Baraick, ” he says. “We were notified that he has an appointment with you.”

  Giving him a reassuring nod, I push my fingers off the door, opening it wider for him to come in.

  Doctor Baraick looks back nervously at the security before stepping inside.

  What?

  “Where would you like the ultrasound to be done?” he asks, clearing his throat.

  I scan the room in confusion. I’m assuming she has to be lying down for this. Glancing back at the doctor, who is now standing by the couch, I tip my head to the side, angling toward the bedroom.

  “Bedroom’s through there.”

  He turns his head back and nods.

  “All right. I’m going to draw some blood after the ultrasound. I should have the results back within 24 hours after I drop it off at the lab.”

  The doctor takes control and makes his way over to the bedroom.

  “Is it all right if I set up now?” he asks once he reaches the door.

  I heard the water turn off right before he got here, but I want to make sure Sophia is dressed. Fuck. When we get back to L.A., her doctor is definitely going to be female. I don’t care if I sound jealous; I don’t want some guy checking out and touching what’s mine. Just the thought of this dude makes me pissed.

  Tapping my knuckles against the wood, I try not to glare at the guy. I give it a second before turning the knob slowly to peek inside. I pause for a moment as I catch my fucking breath. Sophia is sitting at the edge of the bed brushing her hair, wearing these tight as hell jeans with a dark blue, long-sleeved Weezer t-shirt. My lips curl up at the side. The way she looks, sitting there so small and gracious with her perfect posture pushing her chest out. Damn…

  “Doctor’s here.”

  “Tristan?”

  Focusing my eyes back on her, she’s giving me this tongue in cheek smile. Shit. Sophia always has a way of taking me from the now and running somewhere else with her.

  Shaking my head, I open the door farther.

  “He’s gotta set up.”

  Sophia sets her brush down beside her and gets up. Folding her arms over her stomach, she walks over to the window.

  I wave the doctor in and he rolls his case over to the bed. When he lets go of the handle he steps over to her and reaches his hand out, introducing himself.

  “Good afternoon, I’m Doctor Baraick. You must be Sophia, right?”

  He gives her a small smile, and I fucking swear his own damn heart probably stops when Sophia beams up at him, taking his hand into her small one.

  “Yeah,” she giggles.

  Those fucking giggles, fuck! I can’t help but grin at the sucker. His body stills for a moment when Sophia pulls back her hand.

  “Yes, um…”

  I’m over here in the corner cackling, and they both look over at me. Sophia rolls her eyes and the doctor just looks stunned as shit. He shakes his head a couple times, probably to fucking clear it.

  “I’m going to do the ultrasound first. Then, if you don’t mind, I’m going to take some blood afterwards. I should have the results soon.” He stops and goes back to his case to pull out some papers, which he hands to her.

  “If you would fill this out so I can get your basic information so I know who to send the results to.”

  “Sure,” Sophia nods at him, her hair falling into her face.

  She tucks a strand behind her ear when I come up to her. Wrapping my arm around her, I pull her close into me as we watch the doctor take out a small, laptop looking device, which he sets up beside the bed. The bottom board has this white ball embedded in it with arrow buttons positioned around it, with a mini keyboard above that. Plugging it in to this battery pack he has in his case, he pulls out three different white wands.

  “Um, excuse me?” Sophia speaks up.

  The doctor stops what he’s doing and smiles at her. Sophia points to the device he’s working with.

  “Do I need, I don’t know... a gown or something for this?”

  “Actually, I was going to have you go into the bathroom and take your bottoms off and wrap yourself with a towel, ” he says casually. “Since I don’t know how far along you are, we’ll get a better picture doing an internal exam.”

  What the…?

  Closing my eyes, I pinch the bridge of my nose.

  “A what?” I croak out.

  Sophia pats my stomach reassuringly before she steps away from me, heading toward the bathroom. You’re fucking telling me he’s gonna be using one of those fucking wand things up my girl?

  The doctor begins messing with a few buttons. Staring at the screen, he repeats himself.

  “An internal exam…” He glances over his shoulder and continues. “The fetus is probably too small to detect on an external right now. We’ll get a better view for measurements as well having it done this way.”

  Fetus? Holy shit!

  I need to take a fucking seat. Walking over to the corner of the room, I fist the back of the chair with one hand as I plop myself down on it. When the doctor has the computer up and running, he pulls a bottle out of the case and sets it down on the end table beside the bed.

  The bathroom door clicks opens and Sophia looks nervous as hell. Immediately standing up, I drag the chair I was just sitting in over to the side of the bed for the doctor. Sophia walks up to the side of the bed and sits. Knowing she’s bare assed under that towel has my dick twitching.

  Now, I know this guy’s a doctor, and he’s gotta do an “internal” exam and shit, but that doesn’t mean he gets a show. Grabbing the blanket that’s folded neatly on the bed, I raise it up to cover Sophia better so she can scoot back and get comfortable. When I know she’s set, I bring the blanket back down and crawl over her to position myself on my side.

  Taking her left hand in mine, we wait ’til the doctor finishes washing his hands and puts gloves on. Sophia’s body jerks slightly against mine.

  “Are you all right?” I
ask her, keeping my voice low so the doctor doesn’t pick up on it.

  “Yeah, I’m good.”

  She twists her neck and smiles up at me. Not a full one; she’s nervous, I can tell. But I don’t think it’s so much at seeing the baby, as it is being in this fucked up situation, having something get stuck up inside you by some older dude while you lie on a hotel bed with your boyfriend right beside you. At least, that’s what I would be fucking thinking.

  “Okay, I think we’re ready.” Doctor Baraick pulls the chair closer to the bed. “Sophia, if you will just scoot yourself down here and bend your knees.”

  He says it all robotically. Sophia glances up at me one last time with her lips pulled into her mouth, then scoots herself down. My eyes widen when Sophia opens herself up in front of the doctor. I really want to punch him in the mouth right now. Gritting my teeth, I watch as he puts a fucking rubber on this wand, then slaps a bunch of lube all over it. Sophia has her lips pressed tighter in her mouth as she looks straight up at the ceiling. Damn, this must suck for her.

  “I just need you to relax. I’m getting ready to insert the wand,” fucking guy says all matter-of-factly.

  Sophia barely flinches as it goes in and suddenly, after the doctor hits a few keys, a light whooshing noise comes through. The screen still looks like static, so he begins messing with the ball that’s on the board.

  “You’re doing great, Sophia,” he says, more to the screen than to my girl.

  Squinting my eyes, I lean in a little more to get a better view, but I still can’t see shit.

  “Hear that?” He glances first at me, then Sophia. “That’s the heartbeat.”

  Holy shit! The heartbeat!

  I try to hold my breath so I can hear the sound better. Sophia’s chest gently shudders. My eyes scan from the screen down to her. Her blue eyes are glossy. Grinning, she tries to focus on the screen but a tear slips from the corner of her eye.

  “All right, now I’m going to take a few more measurements and I should be able to better estimate a time frame for you both.”

  Sophia and I stare hard at the screen as the doctor stops every few seconds, pressing this button or using that funky mouse on the keyboard.

  “This right here, that’s the fetus’s heart. See that?” He lifts his finger from the board and points to this little dark spot on the screen.

  My stomach plummets and all air has completely abandoned my body at this moment.

  “Oh my God...” Sophia whispers, her lip trembling as we check out this little dark blob we made together on a ten inch screen.

  How is it even fucking possible to feel so much for something that is barely there yet? I don’t know how to explain it, but this moment right here, right now, has to be the best fucking moment I have ever had in my entire life.

  “Everything looks fine from what I see. By the measurements I would estimate that you’re probably around the seventh or eighth week, but the blood work will be more of a determining factor.”

  He gently pulls away from Sophia. Standing, he walks back into the bathroom, removing his gloves. Sophia grabs the blanket and hurries to cover her waist with it.

  “Whoa.” She lets out in a breath. “That was unbelievable.”

  Taking her chin in my left hand, I kiss her lips slowly, savoring the tremble of her plump lips against mine. She presses her hand against my chest.

  “T-Tristan! The doctor is still here,” she whispers nervously, pointing with her finger over to the door.

  “Babe, I wasn’t gonna fuck you with him still here.”

  Her eyebrows rise at my words.

  “Shh!” she says, her lips kissing her index finger.

  She’s embarrassed. Throwing my head back, I laugh hard at her. Sophia uses the back of her hand to lightly swat at my chest.

  “What?”

  My laugh fades, but she just smirks at me.

  Doctor Baraick comes back into the room, picking up the papers from the desk over by the window and handing them to Sophia.

  “I’m just going to step outside while you get dressed. If you wouldn’t mind taking the time to fill these out, I will do the blood work and after that, you should be good to go until you make your obstetrics appointment next week.”

  “All right.”

  Sophia’s voice is quiet as her eyes watch the doctor’s back, as he loads up his things before leaving the room. Once the door closes, Sophia lets out a breath and scurries out of the bed, giving me a perfect view of that round, tanned ass of hers. Fuck.

  Running my hand down my face, I groan when I see her bend over to slip on her panties. When she bends down again to slip her leg into her jeans, she glances over her shoulder.

  “You love it?” she teases me.

  “Goddamn right, I fucking love it.”

  I fucking hate it when I can’t slide into it, though. As soon as Baraick leaves, I’m going to fuck her. I watch my girl put herself together, throwing her hair up into a quick ponytail. I can’t believe how fucking lucky I am that this woman is mine and having my kid. Every fucking inch of her is priceless. Spinning around on her heel, she buttons the top button of her jeans and shrugs.

  “Well, what are you thinking?”

  She rests her hands on her hips, her eyes searching my face. Swallowing hard, I choke out.

  “You…”

  Chapter Twelve

  Sophia

  The way Tristan was staring at me had every cell in my body pulsating and liquid heat rushing to the depths of my core. Everything after that was a lustful haze. I never did do the blood work. I’m sure after a while, Doctor Baraick got the hint and just left. Tristan wasn’t discreet about anything. Just remembering the way his groans echoed over my skin... Shit. I’m sure I wasn’t either.

  I fell into what seemed like a deep sleep afterwards. It was so fucking nice to be able to crash on a real bed rather than what I’ve been having to use on the bus.

  Now I’m backstage waiting on my Frankie to show, slowly chewing on a cheeseburger Tristan had ordered for me before we left the suite. Honestly, it’s kind of churning my stomach a bit, but I know I need some kind of fucking energy for the show and even though I crashed for like five hours, I’m still exhausted.

  “Hello, hello!” Frankie’s voice chirps as he props the door open with his hip, a large bag hanging off his shoulder.

  Giving his hair a quick tousle, he traipses right in.

  “How you feeling, girl?”

  I shrug, dropping the half eaten burger into my lap.

  “Ah, you know… like shit.”

  Unzipping his bag on the counter, his eyes scan over to mine from the side as he smirks at me.

  “That’s nice,” he says with a lisp.

  Laughing at him, I run my fingers through my hair.

  “So, did you find out anything?” he asks as he starts laying out all his makeup supplies in front of him, giving each piece a quick but careful check.

  I nod my head yeah at him, running my tongue over my lips. He stops what he’s doing and turns to me, giving me his full attention.

  “Well?”

  He crosses his arms, nodding his chin for me to go on, his eyes sparkling. I take my time answering him.

  “Well…”

  “Damn, girl. Get to it. I can’t take it. Is everything fine with the baby? Could he tell?”

  Frankie’s words come rushing out. Smiling at my friend, I stand up.

  “Yes, Frankie. Don’t worry. From what he could tell, everything is fine.”

  I rub my hand up and down Frankie’s arm real quick, reassuring him. Stepping back, I slide my hands into my back pockets and continue.

  “We heard the heartbeat.”

  “Ohmygod.”

  “Yeah. It was…”

  I pause for a moment, watching Frankie’s eyes begin to water. Oh, come on. I would normally tell him to suck it up or give him my shoulder, but now, if he starts, then I’m going to start. Blowing out a long breath, I move my eyes away from Frankie
’s for a second, staring at pointless objects on the counter.

  “He said he thinks seven or eight weeks.”

  “Really?” Frankie squeaks.

  My eyes dart back to my friend as he covers his mouth with his hand, his bracelets dangling from his wrist.

  “I’ll know more next week when we’re on break before Europe,” I let him know before taking a seat again.

  Frankie removes his hand from his mouth and inhales deeply, fanning his eyes with it.

  “Don’t want to ruin my makeup.”

  Aw my.

  “Oh, Frankie. Come here.”

  I stretch my arms up to him and he bends over the chair. I pull him into a hug. I don’t know why, but I need a hug from my friend right now. Frankie circles his long arms around my shoulders and lifts me up.

  “Damn you,” he hiccups softly in my ear. “Now I’m going to have to redo my makeup.”

  He chuckles as he sniffles. Holding my body out at arm’s length, Frankie’s eyes study my face. Trails of mascara running down his cheeks, he shakes his head.

  I swipe away his tears.

  “You’re the best,” I say to him softly.

  “I know.”

  He grins back at me teasingly, and just like that, the little moment we had is over.

  Frankie gets back the pep in his step and begins bouncing to the beat of whatever band is on stage right now. Tonight, we’re playing at someplace called The Rav. It’s a smaller venue than what we usually play on this tour, but I love this. We only get a couple here and there.

  I’m really digging this place. It kind of has this Victorian Goth vibe going on; dark and kind of dirty, but in the way that I love. Smaller shows like these are so cool. I like how it feels more intimate, as if you’re just jamming at a party or something.

  Frankie spins the chair toward him and begins to prep my skin, working his lip between his teeth as he concentrates.

  “You know, there’s a gym at the place we’re staying tonight. Maybe before we leave, we should check it out. I mean... I don’t think you had much of a chance since the last show to stay up on your fitness routine.”