Bringing Him Home

by Penny Brandon

  "I'm gonna need crutches," he gasped, ignoring the warning in his head that told him to give this up and lie down.

  "Look, maybe we shouldn't do this right now. I don't think you're ready."

  Kyle glanced into Jared's worried frown. "I'm fine," he lied again. "I'm just going to need your help." He was ready. He had to be ready, because he knew if he didn't leave with Jared now, he might not get the strength to leave with him at all.

  Slipping his arms into the supports of the crutches Jared brought him, Kyle wrestled himself across the hospital room and into the hallway. Jared followed him, silent and obviously not happy, but though this was Jared's idea, it was Kyle's decision. He needed to do this, needed to give Jared the chance Jared had given him. He also needed to put his demons to the back of his mind once and for all.

  Jolted awake, Kyle silently cursed the suspension on the small utility truck Jared now drove instead of the 18-wheeler, though initially he'd been grateful Jared had seen fit to make a swap, because bandaged the way he was, Kyle knew there was no way he'd have been able to climb in and out of the bigger truck's cab.

  Pain radiated from his ankle making him feel sick, while a dull throb from the rest of his body made him feel like he'd gone five rounds with a heavyweight boxer. He released a deep-seated groan and carefully shifted, trying to find a more comfortable position and giving it up as a lost cause when his leg cramped and his chest started to feel like someone was sitting on it.

  "Hey, you okay?"

  Jared's smooth voice sounded over the heavy noise of the engine and the constant hiss of tires over the road. Kyle opened his eyes, the darkness beyond his window giving him a good indication he'd been asleep for at least a couple of hours. He took in a deep breath and faced forward. Bright headlights lit the trees lining the highway, reminding him of the last thing he'd seen before he'd been hit by the car. He shuddered and closed his eyes again before blinking them open and turning to look at Jared.

  Jared's darkened gaze rested on him, eyes wary and full of concern before he pulled his attention back to the road. "You okay?" he repeated.

  "Fine." God, he was going to have to stop saying that. Anyone with a grain of sense could tell by his voice he was lying.

  Jared's gaze flicked over him again. "You look like shit."

  Kyle sighed and tried to sit up a little, biting back his moan of pain this time. "How far before we reach home?" he asked, kind of needing to take a piss and kind of needing to find out how long he had left before his life was turned upside down--not that it already hadn't.

  "We're nearly there. You've been asleep for hours."

  Nearly there? Fuck. Looking out the window, Kyle didn't recognize any of the landmarks, but then it had been twelve years since he'd been here. Twelve years in which things had time to change.

  Kyle couldn't believe he was doing this, that he was going home. No, it wasn't his home, hadn't been for such a long, long time. But it had been a place he'd grown up in, lived in, had, at one time, been loved in. That, of course, had changed the second he'd told his family he was gay. It hadn't occurred to him that they would react the way they had, that they would literally throw him out and refuse to see him or allow him to contact them again.

  Traumatized, on his own, it had taken Kyle several years to get over the bitterness, the heartache, the loss, but he had, and he'd put the pain behind him. He'd begun to feel like he was whole again, that he could hold his head up high and be the man he was meant to be. Until he'd found out where Jared lived. Then all the old insecurities, the hurt, the failure he'd felt as a teenager had come crashing back to make him feel unwanted, unloved all over again.

  He hadn't handled it very well.

  Kyle glanced at Jared and wondered how he was going to tell him, when he was going to tell him, because Jared needed to know before someone recognized Kyle and possibly put two and two together.

  Possibly. He didn't know if anyone in the town knew he was gay or why he'd abruptly left. He doubted his parents would have told anyone, but the town was small and filled with small-minded people, and rumors would have circulated. Rumors edged with speculation that would be brought back into the open the second someone saw him--and made worse when they saw him with Jared.

  Jared was not going to like it, but right now Kyle didn't know what to do about it. He closed his eyes, worried about Jared's reaction, worried just as much about his own. Could he do this? Could he face returning to a town he hated and swore he would never set foot in again?

  Too soon Kyle felt a change in the truck's grip on the road, and he opened his eyes to look out the window, wary, curious. "You've got to be fucking kidding me." The growled appeal had Jared shooting him a worried frown.

  "You okay?" Jared asked, concern lacing his tone even as it hid a touch of irritation.

  Kyle stared out the window. Destiny or cruel coincidence? Kyle had to wonder as Jared maneuvered the truck along a well-remembered driveway. Under the wide sweep of the headlights, a small ramshackle house came into view, exactly the same as when he'd left it twelve years ago. The porch sagged a little more, and it looked like it hadn't been painted in a decade, but it pretty much hadn't changed. Kyle bit back a grimace and another curse. He was coming home, literally.

  He waited for the pain to hit, the humiliation, the past memories to swamp him, and was surprised when none of them did. He felt nothing except a curious numbness.

  Jared pulled the truck around to the back of the house, where a new outbuilding had been constructed. It looked like one of those old Dutch barns, but it was created out of color-bond steel sheeting. Despite its size, the dark green color allowed it to blend in to the surroundings, or what little of the surroundings Kyle could discern out of the darkness. Jared parked the truck beside the barn and switched off the engine. He looked tired but elated, Kyle realized. Clearly Jared liked coming home. If only Kyle could feel the same way.

  It took several minutes for him to maneuver out of the truck, even with Jared's help. Jared hovered beside him, matching his steps to Kyle's careful shuffling. Aches that he'd managed to put to the back of his mind came back to taunt him. Arms, chest, back, thighs, they all burned as his muscles protested his determination to get from the vehicle to the house.

  He avoided looking at the small patchy garden that spread on both sides of the back porch, evaded gazing at the dilapidated twin chairs that seemed abandoned and neglected, shunned noticing the sagging wooden planks that made up the broad veranda, and deliberately closed his eyes as Jared pushed open the old timber door with its peeling paint and cracked glass.

  "Kyle?"

  Kyle didn't want to see the inside of the house, felt physically sick at the thought of it, but when he opened his eyes to see Jared staring at him, real concern in his gaze, Kyle gasped in surprise. The inside of the house was not the same; in fact it had been completely renovated, so nothing remained of the interior he remembered from childhood. A little stunned, he stood on the threshold until Jared spoke to him again.

  "Why don't you go straight to bed and lie down. It's late anyway, and you look tired."

  Kyle dragged his gaze from the polished wooden floors and the smart, clean kitchen that lay to the right of the doorway and quickly glanced around the living-dining room. Gone were the little poky rooms that had made up the layout of his previous home, and in their place was one large, open-plan expanse that looked fresh and inviting. Kyle stepped through the doorway, looking around him in amazement.

  Large leather couches filled the living room, a huge flat-screen television adorned one wall, a neat table and chairs stood close to the kitchen, and a door, situated at the front of the living area on the left, led to what Kyle could only assume was Jared's bedroom.

  "Not what I expected," he said while absently limping into the middle of what he remembered being the old hallway.

  "Expected?" Kyle awkwardly turned to see Jared standing behind him. He shrugged, unable to give Jared an answe
r. It wasn't the time to tell him about the house or his association with the town; that was going to have to wait until he was able to control his emotions and hold up against the tirade he knew would be aimed at him once Jared learned the truth.

  He sighed and lowered his gaze. "You mentioned something about a bed?"

  Jared wrapped warm fingers around his upper arm and gently urged him toward the door he'd spotted. Kyle led himself be guided, too tired to complain or argue. He needed to get a good night's sleep, and then he'd confess.

  The bedroom, like the rest of the house, had been renovated until it was unrecognizable. Kyle was certain this had once been the living room, and the arch that led into a fully fitted bathroom was once the kitchen. A large, king-size bed dominated the room, the covers a dark chocolate brown, masculine, minimal, and if this was Jared's bed, dangerous. He would have loved to sleep in the same bed with Jared but wasn't sure that was a good idea, not right now, not while things were up in the air between them, not until he'd had time to explain why he'd run away.

  "Where are you going to sleep?" He didn't want to ask the question, but he needed to know what Jared's intentions were. If Jared wanted to sleep in the same bed with him, Kyle wouldn't stop him, but he didn't think it fair he encourage it.

  Jared's response was a sharply indrawn breath and a dark scowl. Those multicolored flecks in his eyes darkened with a hurt more definable than anything Kyle had seen so far. Shit!

  "Don't worry about me." The clipped words were not meant to ease Kyle's conscience, and they didn't.

  "You can sleep here if you like. I don't want to put you out." Trying to make amends, Kyle hoped he sounded sincere, but by the way Jared started stripping him, using a hell of a lot less care than when he'd dressed him, Kyle didn't think Jared believed him.

  The T-shirt was yanked off his head as Kyle stood immobile. It probably would have been easier to leave it on, but with the way Jared's jaw was clenched so tight, Kyle didn't have the nerve to say anything. When Jared pulled at the waistband of his jeans, Kyle gritted his own jaw, the slight jarring motion of the jeans being pulled down his hips causing pain to once more flare up from the dull ache it had been. He eyed the bed, and as Jared knelt to peel the jeans off his legs, Kyle sat down on the edge, grateful to get the weight off his good leg and to help Jared in the removal of his clothes.

  "Jared--"

  "Don't, okay. Just leave it." Jared stood, looking down at him, his eyes, for once, an unreadable force. "Get some rest," he said, turning, his back stiff, his shoulders tight, his limbs, his body rigid, indignant.

  "Oh for fuck's sake! Jared!"

  Jared turned, his anger tangible. "What?" he asked, his voice deep and thick with unexpressed emotion.

  Kyle hesitated, knowing whatever he said now could either make or break them, but he didn't know what Jared wanted or even why he'd asked him here. Kyle bit his lip, afraid but needing to make some sort of attempt at a reconciliation or truce or something.

  "What, Kyle?" Jared asked again, his expression now halfway to contempt.

  "Don't walk away angry."

  Jared's eyes widened, and he crossed his arms over his considerable chest, stretching the T-shirt almost to the breaking point. "What makes you think I'm angry?"

  Kyle almost choked trying to hold back his sudden urge to laugh. "Maybe it's because I've pissed you off and you look like you're going to blow your top at any moment."

  "Yeah, maybe," Jared allowed, the edge of his mouth lifting just a little. To Kyle it was a lot. Suddenly knowing what he had to do, he held out his hand, which Jared looked at suspiciously.

  "Come to bed with me. Sleep with me."

  The raised eyebrow he was given caused Kyle's stomach to drop.

  "Sleep with you?"

  "Unless you've got something else in mind." Did he just say that? And not just say it but adding a sexy purr to his voice that couldn't be misinterpreted? Kyle blinked, staring at Jared with butterflies now residing in his stomach.

  The little lift of Jared's mouth inched higher. "I don't really think you're in any condition to do something else."

  Kyle looked down his sore and aching body. Jared was right. Despite the tingle starting in his balls and his cock beginning to think this was a great idea, Kyle knew he wasn't in any shape to make love. But he wanted to, he needed to. For Jared.

  "How about we try and find out."

  For a moment, Jared looked like he was going to refuse; then he muttered something under his breath that Kyle didn't catch but that sounded suspiciously like gonna kill me. Kyle grinned. He never knew relief could feel so sweet, and a little of the confidence he'd lost came back, specifically at the sight of Jared's body, tight and pumped full of expectation. Jared's cock was hard behind the zipper of his jeans and his face was flushed, and as Jared reached for him, his warm fingers sliding beneath Kyle's chin, Jared's hand shook slightly.

  Jared let loose a small sigh, then placed both hands on Kyle's face. Kyle watched, his gaze never wavering until their lips met. Then he fluttered his eyes closed and let sensations of touch and taste take over. Jared's breath was hot, his tongue moist as it stroked along Kyle's bottom lip and then pressed for entry. Kyle opened for him, moaning as Jared's tongue deftly explored his mouth. The kiss was soft and slow, a relearning of texture and flavor. Jared's tongue teased his, sliding gently across the sensitive tip, slipping out and wetting his lip before coming back in for more. Winding his arms around Jared's neck, Kyle pulled him close, trying in some desperately stupid way to tell him he didn't want to let him go, had never wanted to let him go.

  Jared moved closer and slid warm hands down Kyle's chest. The touch was exquisitely soft, and Kyle knew it was simply because Jared didn't want to hurt him. Right then Kyle didn't care about a little pain. Removing his arms from around Jared's neck, Kyle fumbled to find the hem of his T-shirt, pulling it roughly up to expose Jared's back and shoulders, forcing Jared to let go of his mouth so he could get it all the way off. The smile he was given lit Kyle up from the inside. He smiled back, though he knew his smile wasn't half as effective as Jared's had been.

  Jared leaned forward again, moving to trail his lips along Kyle's jaw. The tip of Jared's tongue flicked against his earlobe, and then sharp teeth nibbled on the sensitive flesh. A shiver raced down Kyle's spine, and he moaned again, stunned when Jared laid the flat of his tongue against the entrance to his ear and then dipped inside. Kyle groaned and reached for the stud on Jared's jeans. Hard fingers helped him, sliding soft denim down long legs. Kyle curled his lips into a grin as Jared's thick, hard cock pushed against his black boxers.

  "Get rid of them," he said, indicating the skimpy material that did nothing to hide either Jared's erection or the fact that his balls were full and heavy. Jared's gaze caught his, and with something like a tease, Jared hooked his thumbs beneath the band and slowly shimmied out of them.

  "Like what you see?" Jared asked, hands on hips, cock jutting out from the juncture of his thickly muscled thighs, and a laugh in his eyes that Kyle had almost forgotten seeing there.

  "Definitely." And he did. He liked everything about Jared, from the top of his dark head to the tips of his strong toes. He carefully scooted up the bed and pulled a pillow from under his head and stuffed it beneath his hips while awkwardly shucking out of his briefs. Jared looked at him askance.

  "It would be easier the other way," he said. "Can't you get on your hands and knees?"

  Kyle shook his head. He didn't think he could; the pressure on his ankle would be too much, and he couldn't put a lot of weight on his arms, but that wasn't why he decided not to put himself in that position. He didn't want to be taken from behind.

  "No, I want to look in your eyes."

  Jared would have to know why Kyle wanted them to make love that way. The feeling he'd got when buried inside Jared had been a revelation, a turning point. It compared to nothing he'd experienced before, neither physically nor emotionally, and he w
anted Jared to feel the same, to understand what it was they could still have if Jared would forgive him.

  Jared stared at him for a moment, then nodded, and once again Kyle felt a semblance of relief. This genuinely wasn't going to be the easiest of ways to get his ass reamed, but he really wanted to look in Jared's eyes while they made love, because despite the new feelings that were going on in his heart and mind, he still wasn't sure what was going on in Jared's.

  Jared climbed onto the bed and knelt between Kyle's open thighs. The click of a bottle of lube being opened caught Kyle's attention, and he glanced down his body and watched as Jared poured liquid onto his fingers. Without saying a word, Jared eased Kyle's thighs farther apart. Kyle tensed a little, anticipating the press of Jared's digit through the tight muscle that guarded his body. He knew Jared wouldn't hurt him, but still, Jared's wasn't going to stop at just one finger, not this time. The warm slide of gel at his hole had him tensing even more.

  "Relax."

  "I am."

  Jared raised an eyebrow. "This is relaxed?" he asked, pushing just slightly and meeting resistance.

  Kyle closed his eyes and willed his body to let Jared in, but before he could do anything, Jared loosened his hold and removed his finger. Eyes flying open, Kyle's heart stuttered, thinking Jared had given up, but warm lips came down on his before his brain registered the shift in Jared's weight.

  "Don't freeze me out," Jared whispered against his mouth.

  "I'm not. I want you in me."

  "You sure?" Soft lips and grazing teeth nibbled along his jaw and down to his throat.

  Kyle arched his neck, offering himself, submitting. On his back, legs spread, Jared leaning over him, teeth at his throat, he was at his most vulnerable, yet he trusted Jared. "Yes, I'm sure," he answered, though Jared seemed to have already accepted his consent, because he'd started working his way down Kyle's chest, taking little bites of the flesh not bruised and soothing over it with a soft swipe of his tongue. Light tingles brushed over Kyle's skin, swirling patterns that joined and coalesced at his groin. His nipples hardened even more, painful nubs that begged to be touched. Either sensing Kyle's need or slaking his own, Jared stroked a wet and wonderful tongue across a tight bead of bundled-up nerves that had Kyle gasping for more and that Jared seemed happy to give. The encouragement was probably what Jared was waiting for, because he once again slipped warm fingers between the firm cheeks of Kyle's ass and pressed forward. This time Kyle was ready and welcomed the invasion. Jared's finger slid slow but deep until Kyle felt the edge of Jared's knuckles press against him.