Maybe This Time--A Whiskey and Weddings Novel

by Nicole McLaughlin

  “I know, but still.” Plus, she wondered where TJ was. She should check her phone. Standing up, she walked over to the chair where she’d left her clothes, to find that Charlotte had washed and folded them. Yoga pants and a tank top. Now possibly the only clothes Jen owned in the whole world. She didn’t even have a bra, because she hadn’t been wearing one when she left her apartment.

  Thankfully when Charlotte and Dean had arrived, Charlotte had gone to grab a jacket she’d had in her car for Jen to wear so she could stop crossing her arms over her chest in embarrassment. It hadn’t even occurred to her to grab a bra when she’d left.

  What a harrowing thought, to realize you may not even own one single bra. Jen glanced down at what she’d slept in. A pair of sweats and a T-shirt that Charlotte had given her. Diane had received the same thing. They really owed her for coming to their rescue.

  Deciding it was better to wear this out into the kitchen to say good morning, she turned to her mom. “I’m going to go out. You coming?”

  “Maybe in a little bit.”

  Jen nodded, and then opened the door. Before she headed to the kitchen, she made a quick detour to the restroom and took in her appearance. Ugh.

  Red eyes stared back at her from the mirror. She looked like she’d just been through hell. Which, she figured, was a fair statement, all things considered. Her hair was clean, but she’d slept on it damp, so it was crazy. But there was nothing to be done. She had no brush. No makeup. That thought alone almost made her weep.

  Thankfully Charlotte had given her an extra toothbrush, so she quickly brushed her teeth. That would have to be enough.

  When she opened the bathroom door, she immediately recognized TJ’s voice coming from the kitchen, which gave her a sudden feeling of excitement, but also panic. She stepped down the hall, through the living room, crossing her arms over her chest to conceal her lack of an undergarment.

  TJ was sitting at Charlotte’s small island on a stool. They were all drinking coffee. It smelled like heaven.

  Dean saw her first. “Morning, sleepyhead. How you feeling?”

  TJ jerked around and was off the stool, wrapping his arms around her before she could even take a breath. And then she actually couldn’t breathe, because he had her in a vice grip, with her arms at her sides, and his strong arms around her entire body. If she was going to pass out from asphyxiation, this would be the only way to do it.

  “It was killing me to let you sleep. I was dying to see you,” he said against her hair.

  Angling her hand, Jen tapped him on the hip.

  “TJ … I think you’re hurting her,” Charlotte said from the kitchen.

  He immediately let go and stepped back. “I’m sorry.”

  “It’s okay.” She smiled, a little embarrassed at his display of affection. But when she glanced back to the kitchen, Dean and Charlotte had left them alone. Glancing back at him, she saw he was staring down at her with an odd look on his face.

  “What is it?” she asked, suddenly feeling self-conscious.

  His lips quirked. “I’ve never seen you with no makeup on.” Before she could reply with some self-deprecating retort, he went on. “I’ve never seen you look more beautiful.”

  She was speechless.

  TJ put his hands on her face, leaned down, and kissed her softly. “Is this okay?” he whispered against her lips.

  “Yes.” It was more than okay.

  She could feel his grin, before he kissed her again. Wrapping her arms around his waist, she kissed him back, finally feeling something beyond despair and sadness. This was what she wanted.

  His tongue twisting with hers. His lips on her face, jaw, and neck.

  Once he’d kissed her thoroughly, and for long enough to make her warm and melty, he pulled back. “I’ve been up since we talked.”

  “You’re kidding. I’m sorry.” Jen gently pulled from his embrace and walked into the kitchen. A mug sat beside the coffee maker, so she used it. “I should have waited to call you.”

  “Jen, no. I already made it clear how I felt about that.” He followed her into the kitchen, leaning a hip on the counter as she filled her mug. “What I was going to say is that I’ve had all morning to think about what we should do.”

  She opened the refrigerator to look for some sort of milk or creamer. “TJ, I don’t need you to worry about this. My mom and I have each other. We’ll figure something out.” How or what, she had no idea, but him feeling responsible for helping her was one of the reasons she’d hesitated to contact him last night.

  “I know I don’t have to worry about this. But I want to. And my thought was that … you and Diane should stay with me for the weekend.”

  She looked up at him. “Are you serious?”

  He pushed off the counter “Yes. It makes perfect sense. Where else would you go?”

  “I actually hadn’t thought that far ahead yet. But I honestly don’t know.” She bought herself some time to think by taking a sip of her coffee. He took the opportunity to step closer and touched her elbow.

  “I have two extra bedrooms at my house. You have nowhere to go, and it’s already Friday. Stay the weekend.”

  “I’ll talk to my mom. See what she wants to do.”

  He nodded. “Okay, good.

  A laugh escaped her lips. “Not even an official date and we’re talking about me staying the weekend. With my mother.”

  He grinned. “I can’t think of anything more official than that.”

  * * *

  The first thing Jen and Diane did was call their insurance companies, at TJ’s insistence. “It’s Friday. Let them hear from you as soon as possible so you can get this going.”

  That was the kind of thing she normally might have procrastinated on, but she was glad he’d made a fuss, because at least now she knew what she was dealing with. And as it turned out, Jen had gotten the cheapest insurance. No surprise. They informed her that she would receive replacement value on her possessions up to twenty thousand dollars, but they would need documentation, and pictures would be even better. Her policy had covered no interim housing. Basically, she was homeless, but she’d kind of already deduced that when her apartment caught on fire.

  Her mom on the other hand, had been a little wiser. Her policy not only covered housing in a temporary apartment unit for six months, and replacement value, but also for her salvageable things to be professionally cleaned.

  “Not fair. How much were you paying for that?” Jen asked after they’d both finished.

  Diane shrugged. “Fifty bucks a month.”

  “Damn. Mine was thirty. If I’d have known…”

  “No big deal,” TJ said. “At least you get the replacement value. And you have a place to stay. We can go in there as soon as they give you the all-clear and take some photos.”

  She didn’t push him on the place-to-stay comment. After the insurance phone calls, they’d driven back to the complex in daylight. Jen and her mom had both agreed that they needed to see what had happened. It was a harrowing site. Diane’s building was gutted, since that was where the fire had apparently started. Jen’s side wasn’t nearly as bad, since the two were separated by open breezeways, but the flames had traveled through one unit on that end to the north side of Jen’s place, destroying it, and effectively turning on all the sprinkler systems in the building just as Jen had heard from another tenant the night before. According to the fire chief they spoke to, the smoke and water damage was bound to be extensive throughout the entire structure. It was likely that almost all of Jen’s possessions would be in need of cleaning, or beyond repair. The man had also mentioned that they believed there was asbestos in the ceiling, so there was a chance they wouldn’t be able to go in for even longer than first thought. Maybe not even for a week.

  Even though they’d expected the visit to be difficult, all of that had been hard to hear. And even harder to see, although her mother seemed to handle it better than one would have expected. Jen assumed it had a lot to do with the fa
ct that for most of her life, Diane had been a wanderer. They’d had so many temporary homes, and they’d always traveled light. There probably weren’t a lot of sentimental possessions, but they had both lived at Shady Meadows for about six years, so it was difficult with or without the loss of stuff. It had been their home.

  As Jen kept randomly thinking of something she’d lost, her sadness would renew all over again. Her signed copy of Outlander, the pictures and playbill of Grease from high school, and her favorite pair of boots. That one alone had nearly made her cry.

  But she was also secretly grateful that she’d had a moment to retrieve her special box. It contained what mattered most. The things that could truly never ever be replaced. Her father’s letters and their one photo. The only piece of him she’d ever had. She hadn’t shared that with her mother, since it was uncertain how she would react.

  The day didn’t seem to get any better until she and her mother had gone to Target to get some of the bare necessities. Toothbrushes, makeup, underwear, bras, and a few articles of clothing for each of them. Because her mother hadn’t even made it out with her purse, Jen had opened a new store credit card before they started shopping, just so they could get what they needed. She knew her mother would pay her back when she got her insurance money, but the whole thing still made her feel a little nervous. Those were the kind of decisions that had gotten her into the bind she was in today. She’d been surprised they’d even issued her a credit card.

  Thank goodness they had, though, because by far the best part of the day was the shopping. They’d truly seemed to enjoy each other’s company, something that Jen had never experienced. Her mom had even laughed a couple of times as they’d tried on clothes, then quietly allowed Jen to help her choose a pair of shoes. Even suggested a few things for Jen, which she’d actually liked. As great as it was, it almost made Jen sad, because now she knew what she’d been missing. What she would lose, if her mother didn’t beat this cancer. For the first time in a long time, they’d felt like a true mother and daughter, not just two women tolerating each other.

  On the way out to TJ’s, Jen picked up some pizza. It was the least she could do, besides, she and Diane hadn’t really eaten all day and they were starving. As soon as they pulled into the driveway, TJ came out the front door. The sight of him had Jen holding back a smile as she got out of the car.

  “Need help?” he asked, heading for the bed of her truck.

  “We do, actually. We had to buy quite a bit.”

  “I bet.” He instantly grabbed a half dozen plastic bags in his big hands. “Diane, you go on in. I’ll take care of all this.”

  “Thank you, TJ. And I’m very grateful to you for letting us stay the weekend.” Jen watched her mom squeeze TJ’s arm as she walked around the truck. Diane’s insurance agent had guesstimated that he’d have living arrangements for her by Monday, so the weekend idea had worked out perfectly. Her mom had casually mentioned that Jen could stay with her in whatever place the insurance company provided, but as great of a day as they were having, the thought of living with her mother for any extended amount of time sounded kind of awful. She had, however, appreciated the offer. Then again, there was a chance Jen wouldn’t have a choice but to accept it.

  “You go in, too,” TJ said to Jen. “I can come back and get the rest.”

  “That’s ridiculous, I’m right here.” She scooped up the final three bags and they walked up to the house.

  “This is just beautiful.” Diane was sitting on the porch swing waiting for them.

  “Thank you,” TJ said. “I just had it built last year.” He went to the front door and opened it for them, letting Diane and Jen go in first.

  The rubber plant was still in its spot, with its little fairy, which made Jen smile. In general the home was pretty gender neutral, with earth colors like white, gray, and hints of blue. But that fairy was decidedly feminine. It wasn’t ostentatious so if you didn’t know it was there, you may not notice it, but Jen knew. And she loved it.

  “You want all this on the table so you can go through it?” TJ asked.

  “Uh, sure. I guess so,” Jen said.

  Diane interjected. “Why don’t we take it to where you want us to sleep? I’d hate to make a mess in your kitchen.”

  “Whatever you want,” he said. “Won’t bother me either way.” He looked at Jen and gave her a subtle wink. “I guess it might be easier to take it up in bags, though.”

  It was decided, so they both followed TJ up the stairs. Jen hadn’t been up here yet, and to say she was curious was an understatement. At the landing, he took a right, but Jen’s eyes went left, into what had to be the master bedroom. The bed was unmade, bright white sheets and a gray blanket tossed back. That surprised her. TJ seemed like a make-your-bed every morning kind of guy. Of course she and Dean had woken him up in the wee hours of the morning.

  “Here’s one bedroom,” he said. It was plain, with light-gray walls, a queen-size bed with side table, and a small dresser, and that was about it. “Sorry they aren’t fancy. Thankfully, I got some basic furniture when I moved in, but I just today took the mattresses out of the plastic and made the beds. These rooms have never been used.”

  Jen couldn’t help imagining him rushing home to make up beds for her and her mom. It was possibly the sweetest thing she’d ever heard of. “Thank you. This is just fine,” Diane spoke up, sitting down on the bed. “It feels better than my own.” Nobody mentioned that she no longer owned a bed.

  TJ set all the bags on the mattress beside Diane and then turned to Jen. “Okay, other room.” He nodded toward the door and she followed him.

  “This is the bathroom.” He pointed to a room at the end of the hall, and then pivoted to the room closer to the master bedroom. He flipped on the light and stepped in. “And this is the other room.”

  It was slightly smaller than the first one, but still nice. It had the same dresser and side table as the first room. The only difference was a plant sitting on the dresser. The calathea and its fairy. The sight of it made her eyes begin to burn a bit.

  She felt TJ step up beside her, his chest touching her shoulder as his hands settled on her arms, then his nose brushing the curve of her ear. “I’m glad you’re here,” he whispered.

  Turning her head, she glanced up at him, and his mouth settled on her forehead. Closing her eyes, Jen relished this moment. The feeling of being cared for. Even though he’d made her feel that way before, it still felt foreign. But it was beginning to be a little less terrifying since he insisted on making a habit of it.

  Trust was something Jen was unfamiliar with, but she was starting to see what it might feel like. Vulnerable and uncertain, yes. But with TJ, also a sense of relief. Comfort. Optimism. Things she’d almost never felt before with any sort of consistency.

  “I’m glad too,” she said. “And I love the plant in here.”

  He touched her face. “I wanted you to feel at home.”

  “I do. I’m just … still not used to this. You helping me. Touching me … like this,” she whispered, glancing at the door.

  Never missing even her most subtle cue, TJ reached back and pushed the door shut so they’d have privacy. Then he looked down at her and responded. “Well, you need to get used to it, Jen. Because I’m happy to do it. You have no idea.”

  She sucked in a breath. “I hate that it’s because my life has been such a mess lately.”

  He shook his head. “Jen, everyone has times like this. And I don’t care what the reason is. I’ll take any opportunity to be what you need.”

  Her stomach growled and they laughed silently, foreheads close to touching. “Right now, I need some pizza. I brought some. It’s on the seat of my truck.”

  “You didn’t need to do that. But I’ll go get it. Grab your mom and meet me in the kitchen.”

  She nodded as he stepped toward the door. Before he left, he looked back at her. “Just so you know”—he glanced at the bed—“I’d be just fine if you chose not to sleep i
n here.”

  And then he was gone.

  There was only one way to interpret that.

  Seventeen

  Later that evening, after they’d eaten and sorted out all their things, and Jen had done a load of laundry, she said good night to her mother.

  “I’ll see you in the morning, Mom. Do you want your door shut or open?”

  “Shut. In case I snore.”

  Jen smiled, still amused by the sight of her mother in her new cat pajamas. Seeing her in such a flimsy top reminded Jen of something. “Mom, you need to call the doctor and let him know you don’t have access to your medicine. They will definitely want to get you some right away.”

  “Oh, yes. I already did that,” Diane said.

  Jen tilted her head. “When?”

  “Earlier today. I’ll ask Terri if she can run me over tomorrow to pick it up.”

  “I can take you.”

  “Oh, okay. We can talk about it tomorrow.”

  Jen nodded. “Night, Mom.”

  “Hey,” her mother said. Jen turned back. “Why aren’t you sleeping in his room, if you guys are seeing each other?”

  Jen hesitated, then sighed. If she wanted a close relationship, she’d have to be honest. “That wasn’t true, Mom. TJ was kind of protecting me from your judgment. He and I … this is all sort of new.”

  Diane stared at her from her seat on the bed. “He likes you a lot.”

  Jen shrugged. “Maybe.”

  “Maybe my ass. He does, and it doesn’t surprise me one bit. Any man would be lucky to have you, Jen, and TJ is obviously a good one. You should give him a chance.”

  Considering that, Jen smiled and nodded, then pulled the door shut. She turned to head to her own room, then stopped at the doorway and listened. She could hear water running from the master bedroom as if TJ was brushing his teeth or washing his face. It was easy to picture him standing at the sink, bare chested, sexy as hell.

  Without thinking, she walked to his door, gently pushed it open, and stepped quietly into his room before shutting the door behind her. The bed was still unmade, a soft lamp lit on his nightstand. The room smelled spicy, like his cologne, and she was tempted to just lie down in that big bed and wait for him. Instead, she peeked in through the bathroom door.